The Saintess's Regret
"Will we ever be forgiven?"
Clatter, clatter. I was riding in a luxurious carriage, heading toward the capital, Giganteus. Saintess Elihart, who had been sitting in silence for a long time, wore a look of deep anxiety on her face. 'We will never be forgiven. Never...'
She had committed an act that should never have been done. And it was a collective effort. The entire Hero's Party. We had overlooked one man's death. Even though there was time to stop it, we let our individual desires take hold... We committed the shameless act of closing our eyes and plugging our ears when faced with the wall of reality. He was a comrade who had been with us for ten whole years, and we did something so cruel...! Something so heartless...! Something no human being should ever do...!
Elihart was so disgusted by the ugly deed she had committed that she had been retching and suffering for days on end.
"Ugh, ugh, ugh...!"
"Eli! Are you okay?"
Cornelia quickly held out a bag with a worried look on her face. It was a gesture meant to let her vomit comfortably. Elihart shook her head.
"I'm fine for now. Thank you."
"If it's hard, try to sleep. No, wait. We're almost there, so that might be awkward. We'll be arriving soon."
"Yes..."
Pwooooooo—!
Outside the carriage, the sound of trumpets rang out magnificently from afar. Countless flags were lined up in long rows on both sides of the city walls. Below them, the soldiers and commanders guarding the capital were waiting to greet us with bright faces.
"Heroes! We celebrate your return!"
"Thanks to you all, light has returned to the world!"
"Hero Arandal! The genius puppeteer Lito! The master of elements, Cornelia! The representative of God, Elihart! And... I feel like there was someone else? Who was it? Ah, ah! Anyway, we pay our respects to your dedication and sacrifice!"
The carriage passed through the massive gates to the enthusiastic applause of the soldiers. The citizens were also out on the main street, their faces filled with anticipation. The Hero's party stepped out of the carriage and began walking down the main street of the capital, waving brightly.
"Thank you, everyone! Thanks to you, we were able to achieve victory!"
Hero Arandal walked in the lead, laughing energetically. His companions followed behind him, waving as well. But in the midst of it all, only Elihart’s expression was forced; it was so awkward that she looked as if she were on the verge of tears.
'We don't deserve this. He should have been here, too. Nightstream...'
In front of the people cheering on both sides of the street, I couldn't just put on a mask and smile. It’s hard. It’s impossible. I wish they hadn't made me do this. I want to run away. Please, stop it... The more this happens, the more I want to die...
'He committed suicide because of us. He... Nightstream, he...'
Nightstream, who had been more devoted than anyone in the Hero's party. He was the person who always volunteered to infiltrate enemy lines alone, risking great danger, and always guided the Hero's party down the easiest path. If he hadn't been in the party... the speed of the Demon King's subjugation would have been delayed, and we would still be struggling now.
'What on earth did we do to such a grateful person?'
We tore his heart to shreds. And the end was suicide. Why did we inflict such cruel wounds on such a sincere and kind person? As a cleric serving God, my conscience cannot bear it. I have no way of knowing how to repent and cast off this guilt. I will never be able to. Because he is already dead. I can't even meet him to apologize.
'Elihart! I made this for you. Everyone else doesn't know today is your birthday. I didn't tell anyone and made it secretly to earn some points with you. Eat up.'
'Don't worry! I'll definitely break through the retreat path, so rest easy!'
'How dare these bastards surprise our party's Saintess! I won't let them get away with it!'
'Elihart. Whenever I see you, my heart feels at peace. I'm grateful for your very existence. You're always a great strength to the party. I look forward to working with you in the future.'
'Here, a gift. Don't get the wrong idea; I'm not giving it to you because I like you. I know you don't like me because I'm a whore who occasionally has sex with monsters during missions, which brings bad luck. It's loyalty, loyalty. A gift of loyalty.'
Suddenly, tears burst forth.
"Sob...! Why didn't you like me...! I liked you...! Sob, sob...!"
"Eli?"
Cornelia, who had been waving to the crowd, looked back with a surprised face. "Why are you crying?"
Elihart quickly wiped her tears. "Oh, no. It's just... I'm so moved..."
"Hahaha. Right? It's great to have people cheering for us. It feels like all the hardships we've endured are being washed away!"
At the end of the march, the magnificently built main castle came into view. Nobles were waiting in front of it.
"Heroes who saved the world, please come inside! His Majesty is waiting for you!"
The walls of the main castle. The Emperor stood at the highest point, looking imposing. After looking down and examining the faces of the Hero's party, he realized one person was missing and curled his lips in satisfaction.
"It's good not to see that vermin."
Flap. He turned and walked into the building, his red cloak fluttering behind him.
The King's Hall, packed with nobles.
"Everyone, raise your heads."
Emperor Ronan’s voice rang out. The Hero's party, who had been kneeling on one knee in polite respect, raised their heads in unison. The Emperor, sitting on the throne on the dais, was looking down at them.
"You have done truly well. I was relying only on you all."
Amidst an atmosphere where nobles were cheering and applauding, the Emperor’s encouragement and praise continued.
"Hero Arandal. As promised, I will give you the Second Princess."
"Th-thank you!"
Arandal looked at the Second Princess, Lucrezia, with great joy. Lucrezia, wearing a silver tiara on her head, gave a shy smile.
"Go on. Go and embrace your future husband."
As the Emperor gestured, Lucrezia hesitated for a moment out of shyness, then giggled and ran forward. Arandal pulled her into his arms as she embraced him.
"Pr-Princess! Sob! I am so happy!"
"I don't know... Hehehe."
Arandal thought to himself, 'My judgment was correct! Let's forget Nightstream! He has already left this world!'
While he was dying of happiness, the Emperor looked down at Cornelia.
"I shall bestow upon you the position of Court Mage, along with the title of Countess."
"Your Imperial grace is boundless!"
Cornelia had finally achieved her dream. Unable to contain her excitement at the realization of her childhood dream, she gasped for air, then suddenly let out a suggestive moan as if she had reached a climax.
"Haaang, aaaang...! It's the best...! It was really good to abandon Nightstream...!"
People surprised by her lewd voice blinked in confusion, but the event quickly resumed.
"Lito. I shall bestow upon you the position of Minister of State, along with the title of Count."
"It is an honor!"
Lito quickly looked back at his father, who was among the nobles. His strict father was smiling contentedly and applauding, as if to say he finally recognized him. Lito’s mouth was filled with ecstasy.
'Nightstream-hyung, I'm sorry! This is happiness I gained thanks to you! I'll think of you sometimes, so live well in heaven!'
Finally, it was Elihart’s turn.
"Elihart. We have decided to nominate you as the sole candidate for the Papacy to be elected in five years."
"..."
Elihart clutched her chest tightly without a word. When she didn't answer for a long time, the palace official urged her.
"Respond to His Majesty’s great mercy."
Gulp. Elihart squeezed her eyes shut and then opened them again.
"I... I am terrified to say this, but I will not accept."
At those quiet words, the Hero's party, who had been enjoying their own joy, as well as the nobles watching, were greatly stirred.
"Why is she suddenly doing that?"
"I felt like her expression had been bad since the street march earlier."
"Is she showing some kind of dissatisfaction toward His Majesty?"
"She must have something up her sleeve."
"As expected of a traitor's child. She still has that rebellious streak."
The gazes focused from all sides were stinging. As if asking how someone like her could refuse the grace bestowed by the Emperor.
"I wish to remain a Saintess as I am now. Poverty, no power, a life of temperance. This is the life I desire and the mission God has given me. I apologize, but I earnestly request that you bestow the size of the reward you intended for me upon the poor."
She managed to smooth things over so as not to disturb the Emperor’s mood. The event ended safely, and Elihart did not even attend the grand evening banquet, returning to the temple alone. After a long journey, it was the home she had faced after many years, but she was overcome with guilt rather than joy, and tears continued to flow.
"Nightstream... even if it's late, I atone to you like this."
A small prayer room set up in a corner of her room. In front of the goddess statue. She calmly took off her Saintess robe. The female body she usually kept hidden was revealed little by little. Fair, white skin. Breasts too voluptuous for a chaste and pious cleric to carry. A slender waist. Round and sturdy hips that stimulated the male heart. Slender legs. Now naked, she pushed her clothes aside and knelt before the goddess statue.
"Please watch over me from the other world, even now. With this body stained by sin, I want to offer you comfort and calm your anger, even if just a little..."
Without hesitation, she picked up the whip lying on the floor.
Whack!
She struck her own back.
"Sob!"
It hurt so sharply that tears welled up. "Look. You’re happy, right? I, the one who drove you to suicide, am being punished."
Whack!
"Sob!"
Whack!
"C-curse me. Ask me why I abandoned you, why I didn't help you. Scold me, calling me a dirty and ugly hypocrite."
Whack!
"Haa! N-Nightstream...! From today on, I will be the drainage for your anger. Pour all your curses and insults onto me. I will endure it all. Kugh! P-please, calm your anger and sleep peacefully. In a comfortable and warm heaven...!"
***
On the way to the Taron Principality where Lady Diana is.
The carriage was running through the great nature that held the hidden scenery of the mountain range.
"Shall we take a break?"
Elenore, who had been driving the carriage all day, looked tired. She nodded, and we decided to take a short break.
"Wow, the scenery is nice."
"The smell of grass is good."
We sat down side by side on the grass by the roadside and admired the scenery for a while.
"This reminds me of the old days for some reason."
"What kind of thoughts?"
"I knew a Saintess once, and she suggested that we travel the world together later and do missionary work. At the time, I readily accepted, saying, 'That sounds great!', but thinking about it now, it's so absurd."
"Have your feelings changed?"
"She was a person I shouldn't have been with. Someone with a weak will."
"I'm curious about the story. Please tell me in detail."
"No, you just need to know this much."
I took a deep breath of the clear air. The area around where we were resting was a feast of fresh green. I smiled calmly as I watched the dandelions swaying in the wind.
"I decided to cut ties. Because of my background, I don't want to be a burden to that person anymore. If we ever meet again, I'll pretend I don't know them."