Eden 1 - The Pizza Villain's Kneeling Catastrophe
Honestly, kneeling just to eat one pizza? Where's your human dignity? Lee Han's pulling some scam on everyone. I guarantee that pizza's all hype. It's loaded with msg and probably drugs to numb your taste buds. And you're paying 5 million won for that? Intelligence issue lololol
The old man's hand, swiping down his smartphone, trembled uncontrollably.
A penthouse towering over downtown Seoul at a glance. Walls crammed floor-to-ceiling with countless canned goods, dried rations, preserved foods. The owner of this massive food bunker—and a named troll on Hunter Inside.
PizzaVillain.
His true identity was one of Black Moon's hidden figures: the Elder of Abundance.
"These... uncivilized fools."
The Elder of Abundance read the comments with bloodshot eyes.
"Selling your souls for mere dough? No pride at all."
Even among Black Moon, he was the greediest, the most prepared. The impending catastrophe. When Choi Ik-hyeon's prophesied day of doom arrived, currency would be worthless scraps, and food alone would be power. For that day, he had scraped together ingredients from around the world to stock his ark.
...Gulp.
The Elder's saliva launched down his throat without permission. His gaze was fixed on the photo filling his screen: a pepperoni pizza from Atonement Slice.
Red pepperoni glistening with oil. Cheese stretching endlessly without breaking. Its lustrous form seemed ready to burst through the screen, aroma and all.
"...Hah. Driving me insane. For real."
He shook his head to fend it off, but saliva pooled in his mouth again.
"Right, this is verification. Just checking if it's worthy of my ark. What if that pizza really has drugs hypnotizing people? If I analyze it myself and expose the truth, the gallery opinion will swing my way."
With his mind made up, he opened the secondhand trading app.
'Hope the price hasn't dropped.'
"Those! Damn resellers!"
The Elder of Abundance gnashed his teeth. A pizza that looked like it cost 30,000 won original, going for 5 million? Even for him, with money rotting away, this was a matter of pride.
Yet his fingers, beyond his brain's control, had already hit send on the [Payment Complete] message.
"Urgh... That was such a precious order right."
As 5 million won vanished from his account, self-justification filled the void. A strange sense of liberation hollowed his chest, mingled with bizarre anticipation.
"This is pure research. Market research. Definitely not because I want to eat it."
Ding-dong.
The Elder of Abundance stood before his front door. His heart pounded. He cleared his throat and straightened his clothes before opening. Draped in top-grade silk robe, he looked every bit the dignified elder.
Clack. The door opened to reveal a hulking man in a helmet. Red skull mark on his neck and jacket—likely one of Red Skull's remnants absorbed by Lee Han.
"From Atonement Slice."
The delivery guy held the pizza box, asking in a deep voice, "You the PizzaVillain who ordered?"
Shame at hearing his nickname aloud, but the Elder nodded sternly. "Y-Yes."
"You know the rules?"
The delivery guy eyed the floor. The Elder's eyebrow twitched.
'Bought the pizza above retail and that's annoying enough.'
Me, the Elder of Abundance. The one to rule the post-apocalypse world. Kneeling before a mere pizza delivery boy?
Gallery comments flashed in his mind.
The Elder bit his lip. Standing on pride here meant losing the pizza—and money aside, he'd never sleep tonight.
'Fine. It's a ritual. A reverent courtesy to the flavor... a cultural experience.'
Smoothly, the mighty Elder knelt on the floor. Hands raised piously above his head. He looked like a priest awaiting an oracle.
The delivery guy nodded approvingly and slowly lowered the box.
"Do you vow to honor the sacred pizza?"
"...I do."
The words escaped at last. Shame flushed his face red, but the warm pizza box touching his fingertips compensated all.
"Enjoy, brother."
The delivery guy turned coolly toward the elevator. The Elder froze, box on his head.
Smoky pepperoni scent piercing his nose. Heavenly aroma leaking from the box seams.
"Is this... true atonement."
Overwhelmed with emotion, he rose to savor the sacred meal.
"Yo, check that out. Ain't that the pizza?"
A sleazy voice echoed from the emergency stairs, past the descending elevator. Three thugs with baseball bats and steel pipes.
"If we can't snag it on delivery, hit 'em after."
"Fuck yeah, you're a genius."
The same punks from last delivery, schooled and harboring grudges.
"Damn, smells killer."
"Old man, hand it over nice."
"Lmaoooo live challenge footage."
"Kneeling already? Scared shitless."
They snapped photos nonstop, closing in. The Elder slowly raised his head. The warm pizza box still cradled in his arms.
His eyes no longer held the submissive glint from moments ago.
"...How dare you."
The Elder of Abundance's voice rumbled low, scraped from hell's depths.
"Covet my food?"
To him, food was life, power, promised future. In his hands now: the pinnacle, bought for 5 million won—and his knees.
"Crazy old fart talking shit? Yo, time for real lesson!"
One thug swung his steel pipe.
Crack!
The pipe lost form before touching the Elder.
"Huh?"
"You'll make fine protein sources."
Mana surged around the Elder.
Table of Abundance (Grade: A)
Forcibly decomposes targets into organic matter.
"A-Argh! My arm! What's wrong with my arm!"
"S-Spare me! My body's melting!"
The thugs' bodies oozed like sinking in quicksand. Flesh separated from bone, forms turning to red fertilizer seeping into the floor.
The Elder of Abundance. He could sprout life—but also revert it to manure.
"Begone. Fertilize my garden."
He flicked his wrist indifferently. The scene ended in seconds. Thugs vanished without trace; only he remained.
"...Ah."
A sigh escaped the man who thought it settled.
Mana storm from processing the thugs. The pizza box, caught in the aftermath, lay smashed on the floor.
Dented, contents spilling from the gash. Toppings and cheese smeared disastrously.
Right where the thugs had melted.
"N-No..."
The Elder collapsed.
"My pizza... my 5 million... my atonement right..."
Trembling hands tried salvaging, but it had crossed the Styx. Pizza mixed with thug-fertilizer remnants. Even he couldn't eat that.
"Aaaaaargh!!"
The Elder of Abundance tore at his hair, wailing like a child over one pizza. He who would command the world.
Through tear-blurred vision, print on the crumpled box waved mockingly.
/ Swift · Safe Delivery /
/ 100% Customer Satisfaction /
/ Contact us anytime for incidents. /
"...!"
Clutching at straws. Desperate to reclaim his lost pizza.
Trembling, he grabbed his smartphone.
Gyeonggi-do, Gwacheon—a monitor showing a vinyl greenhouse interior.
"......"
Lee Han, Adel, and Black Rose held their breath, eyes flicking between smartphone and monitor on the table.
Vrrr. Unknown caller.
Vrrr.
"It's here."
Vrrr.
Adel's tracking program pinpointed the origin: not Gwacheon, but central Seoul—a luxury penthouse.
"He bit."
At Lee Han's words, Adel's eyes sharpened. She donned headphones, tuned the bug, thumbs-upped.
"Signal good. Voice pattern analysis ready."
Black Rose swallowed dryly, tense. "I'll drag it out—finish the analysis."
Lee Han deep-breathed, donning the world's kindest, gentlest voice.
Click.
"Hello. This is Atonement Slice, saving souls with every slice."
-Gasp... sob... Boss...
The old man's woeful sobs crackled through the receiver.
"Yes, sir? What's wrong? Issue with the pizza?"
-An accident... an accident happened...
He sniffled, explaining: thugs ambushed post-receipt, pizza spilled in self-defense.
-Truth is... I paid 5 million won... haven't taken a bite... what do I do...
The mighty Elder sniveling over pizza. Lee Han stifled laughter, feigning gravity.
"Oh no. Truly tragic. The sacred atonement ritual interrupted."
-Re-order? I'll pay more! 10 million? No, 100 million! Just one pie... please send another!
100 million. Scale's different, alright.
Lee Han eyed Adel. She pointed at the monitor.
Location: Eden Penthouse, Gangnam-gu, Seoul
Voice Match: 99.9% >>> Elder of Abundance
Gotcha.
Lee Han cooed into the phone, sweetest voice.
"Sir, per policy, no redeliveries post-receipt."
-N-No...
"But your earnest plea moved us. Specially, by boss authority, we'll send a service pie."
-R-Really? Truly?
"Of course. Customer satisfaction first."
-Thank you... truly! I won't forget this grace!
"See you soon."
Click. The kind smile vanished from Lee Han's face.
"As expected, Gwacheon was a decoy. 'Eden Farm' camouflage, but the real body's feasting in a Seoul penthouse."
The Elder of Abundance. The one hoarding food to unleash catastrophe and control humanity.
Done in by his gluttony—exposing himself.
"Adel. Let's roll."
"Was waiting."
Adel tossed her headset, grabbing magitech tools one by one.
"Needed a test subject anyway."