Chapter 5
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: penny
Chapter: 5
Chapter Title: Assassins are Optimized for Office Jobs
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Darkness had fallen over the side hall. A single candle flickered precariously.
Under that faint light, the emperor of the empire, Emperor Juwon, gazed down at the report with cold eyes.
And kneeling before him were the former Gold Army Commander, General Ma Cheolsan, and the former Chief State Tribunals, Minister Gwak Jeong-eon.
"So... there was poison in my son's meal?"
The emperor's voice was low, but the killing intent it carried froze the air in the side hall.
"The silver chopstick discolored. Fortunately, Crown Prince Your Highness did not partake."
General Ma Cheolsan reported, sweat beading on his brow. The emperor let out a scoff. His mouth smiled, but his eyes did not.
"Whether it's Consort Wei or some other concubine, I don't know who yet, but they're quite bold."
"Your Majesty, shall we turn the inner palace upside down right away?"
General Ma Cheolsan asked menacingly, but the emperor shook his head.
"No. If we move rashly, the rats will scurry into their holes. We need to catch their tails. And that boy Jui-an—he's sharper than I thought. He overturned the table himself?"
"Yes. His senses are no ordinary matter."
"However, we can't rely on luck forever. He needs a shadow at his side twenty-four hours a day. The Gold Guards are too conspicuous, and the eunuchs can't be trusted."
Gwak Jeong-eon, who had been silent amid the emperor's concerns, cautiously spoke up.
"Your Majesty. This humble subject has... a candidate."
"A candidate?"
"Five years ago, during my inspection of Sichuan Province, I took in a child. The sole survivor from a gu poison jar."
The emperor's eyebrow twitched.
"Gu poison. If they survived that vicious sorcery, they must be a master of poisons."
"Yes. Moreover, their talent as a killer is already at its peak. Above all... their childlike appearance raises no suspicion. Disguised as a peer and playmate to Crown Prince Your Highness, they can protect him from the closest vantage."
The emperor rested his chin on his hand, lost in thought for a moment, then nodded.
"Very well. Assign that child to him. If a single hair on my son's head is harmed, that child's head and yours will roll together."
"I shall obey your command."
The adults' secret meeting ended, and the candle was extinguished. An invisible blade was now heading toward the crown prince's side.
Rise at 3:30 a.m.
5 a.m. morning assembly.
7 a.m. private audience with Father Emperor.
9 a.m. delightful study and exercise time.
This murderous schedule alone was grounds for a labor complaint, but lately, an utterly infuriating item had been added to my routine.
[Always: Struggle for Survival]
My situation was far from normal right now.
Yesterday at lunch, the silver chopstick in my soup turned pitch black. The night before, I heard someone stepping on the tiles on my roof and couldn't sleep.
Ever since the emperor named me crown prince, I figured the concubines with powerful backers had finally decided to flex their muscles.
"Minister Gwak. I can't take this anymore."
I irritably tossed my brush aside. The stack of memorials on the desk came crashing down.
"If this keeps up, I can see my future plain as day. Death from overwork, starvation from skipped meals, or assassination. One of the three."
Minister Gwak looked troubled at my outburst, yet wore an oddly composed expression as he replied.
"The Gold Army is guarding the perimeter airtightly, but..."
"Those hulks can't exactly come inside my room. Don't I need someone nimble who can stick around in here and help with chores too? Someone I can trust! There isn't a single one!"
I vented furiously.
But Minister Gwak, as if he'd anticipated my demand, smiled like he'd been waiting for it.
"Hmm... I didn't realize Your Highness's plight was this severe. However, we've prepared a candidate after consulting with His Majesty."
"Prepared?"
"Yes. Come in."
Minister Gwak clapped his hands, and the door opened. A small shadow slipped inside.
It was a girl. She looked about twelve or thirteen.
At a glance, she seemed like a frail maidservant. But up close, her pale skin bordered on ghostly, and her eyes held a chill unfit for a child.
My instincts screamed a warning. This was no ordinary kid.
Yet at the same time, I thought, she's too young. What could a child like that do to help?
"Her name is Soso. She'll be Your Highness's peer and helping hand."
I snorted in disbelief.
"Minister, did you assign me a nanny? I don't need someone to change my diapers. I need a swordsman to guard my life."
Minister Gwak leaned in close and whispered softly but clearly into my ear.
"She's no ordinary child. Years ago, during my inspection of Sichuan Province, I took her in—the sole survivor of a gu poison jar."
"Gu poison?"
I'd heard the term somewhere before. Noticing my curiosity, Minister Gwak elaborated.
"A vile sorcery where hundreds of venomous insects and children are sealed together to kill each other off, leaving one survivor as a poison person. Her growth stunted by toxins, but her killer techniques are top-tier."
Minister Gwak's eyes gleamed.
"His Majesty approved personally. She'll be Your Highness's final dagger."
Hoo. So, a baby-faced assassin. I eyed Soso with interest.
She didn't bow her head even meeting my gaze. Her emotionless animal eyes scanned me impassively, lingering on vital points... It gave me chills for no reason.
Still, I couldn't show weakness. I threw out a tough line.
"Hey, you."
"..."
No response, but I pressed on aggressively.
"Can you work?"
Instead of answering, Soso reached into her bosom. An assassin pulling a dagger? I raised a hand to stop her and pointed to the pile of documents on the desk.
"Not a blade. Sort them."
Soso's eyebrow twitched.
Just then, an inner servant entered with tea and snacks. As a test, I slid a teacup toward her.
"Thirsty? You drink first."
Soso took the cup without hesitation. She sniffed it, then downed it in one gulp.
"Hey, that..."
I feigned surprise. Truth be told, I'd skipped it because of a weird smell and feel. Now I'd look like the villain.
"That smelled off. You okay? Should I call a physician?"
A normal person might not notice, but honed from infancy, my senses picked up the odd aroma clearly.
Soso didn't bat an eye. She looked like she'd just had plain barley tea.
"Crude paralyzing powder. Just a slight tingle on the tongue."
"..."
Assassins gonna assassin. A slight fear was turning serious.
"This level of poison couldn't even kill a fly."
I'd have been in big trouble if I'd drunk it. And did she just compare the crown prince to a fly? Gutsy. Maybe trustworthy? Her skills seemed legit, at least.
"Good. From now on, check my food and drink first. Appreciate it."
Soso's eyebrow twitched faintly. Raised as an assassin, being treated like a food taster bruised her pride, it seemed.
But that wasn't my problem. Survival came first.
"Your poison detection is top-notch. Now, let's see if you can handle paperwork."
I pointed to the mountain of memorials and documents awaiting approval.
"These need sorting by Revenue Department, War Department, Justice Department. I'll read the contents; you slot them into the cabinets on that wall. Got it?"
"You want me to walk over and file them myself?"
"Got a better way?"
I shot back and sat, picking up a bundle.
"Starting. This one's Yellow River levee repairs. Revenue."
I lifted the papers, and suddenly something flashed before my eyes.
Whoosh!
From Soso's sleeve shot something like a skewer or giant needle, lightning-fast. It pierced the paper I'd held perfectly and thudded into the cabinet on the wall.
"...!"
I jumped, but her skill left me speechless. The paper wasn't torn or crumpled—just skewered neatly by the margin into the slot.
"Next."
Soso said flatly.
What if she'd hit my hand? Still...
"Unbelievable."
This could be useful. An idea struck; I summoned servants at once.
I had them fetch a large wooden board and mount it on the wall. Bring more pins too, since it'd run short. Then I held up papers and called out.
"Border garrison supplies. War Department."
Whoosh-thud!
"Bandit suppression. Justice."
Whoosh-thud!
Dozens of documents pinned to the wall in seconds, aligned perfectly by heat.
I worried about my hands, but the speed was unmatched. Faster than any clerk running around.
"Impressive. Where'd you learn that?"
My praise only soured Soso's expression.
"It's a technique called Flying Leaves Piercing Crimson. Piercing an enemy's brow amid scattering autumn leaves—a one-hit kill secret art."
A hint of dissatisfaction flickered in her eyes.
"This skill isn't for skewering scraps of paper."
"What are you talking about?"
I countered seriously.
"Plenty of people can kill. I need someone to handle urgent work now. Perfect skill—why complain?"
Soso seemed speechless. Watching her hands, another idea formed. I prepped the next task.
"Sorting's done. Now seals. Come here."
I spread the sorted papers on the desk and handed her my crown prince seal.
"Stamp here, here, and here. Just the ends, rapid-fire. As fast as possible."
Soso sighed, seal in hand. But orders were orders. Her eyes sharpened, and her hands blurred into motion.
Tat-tat-tat-tat-tat!
I saw nothing. Just afterimages as her hand swept over the papers like a machine gun.
"Done."
Fifty sheets stamped perfectly in moments, aligned impeccably.
"Whoa... What technique is that?"
"A variant of Phantom Hand. Originally for striking ten acupoints at invisible speed simultaneously, but..."
Soso hesitated, then bowed her head in disbelief.
"Not meant for stamping either..."
"No, excellent! Acupoints or stamps—same difference!"
I gave a thumbs-up.
"You're now chief secretary. Help with everything you can while assisting me. Why waste killer skills on killing? Use them to aid the realm. Isn't this turning a slayer's blade into a savior's?"
Assassin no more—now a fine societal cog as secretary. She smirked at my pitch.
"Your Highness speaks nonsense with silver tongue."
Soso looked exasperated but not unwilling. If truly against it, she'd have struck already. No strike meant approval?
Then—
"Your Highness! Physical training time!"
The door slammed open. Muscle monster Ma the Elder burst in and froze at the scene.
Papers skewered to a board on the wall, stamped stacks like mountains on the desk. A girl holding my seal in the middle.
"Wh-what is all this?"
His face screamed utter bafflement.
"Come in, General Ma."
I grinned and stood.
"Thanks to my new friend, paperwork finished an hour early. Great. Oh, this is Soso, my new secretary."
Ma Cheolsan eyed the wall pins and her hands alternately, clucking his tongue.
"Well, damn... No amateur skills, wasted on filing. Unbelievable even seeing it."
"I'll take that as praise. Early finish—off to train."
I strode out lightly. Soso followed, her expression a complex mix.
Raised as a killing machine, now reemployed as a five-year-old crown prince's secretary. Her path looked rough.
But what could be done? She was just like me—caught in the wrong place.
For my peaceful life, I'd use anything. Poison, blade, or assassin.
And the killer side of Soso I'd half-ignored revealed itself that very night.
After grueling studies, training, and work, it was deep night. Lie down sooner for more sleep.
Exhaustion meant out cold in three seconds.
'Sleep... Tomorrow's hell too...'
As consciousness faded, the air shifted.
A chill crawled up my spine. The bloodlust of a beast spotting prey filled the room.
I snapped my eyes open.
Whoosh-thud!
A sharp rupture echoed as a black shadow dropped from the ceiling. Another fell—Soso. Startling.
Regaining my wits, moonlight filtered through the window, piercing the paper door to illuminate Soso. Beyond her, an assassin with a brush through his throat toppled slowly.
"Guh... grrk..."
Soso gazed at him emotionlessly and murmured instructively.
"Quiet. You'll wake Your Highness."
No thrill or fear in killing. Just processing paperwork.
She approached the fallen foe and yanked the brush free without hesitation.
Squelch.
Dark red blood splattered, one drop on her white cheek. She didn't wipe it, just inspected the brush tip calmly.
"Awake?"
Her eyes met mine in the cold moonlight—stunningly beautiful, eerily so.
"No hidden weapons handy, so I used a brush in haste. Damaged it. I'll replace and report."
I nodded dumbly.
"Caught a rat. A big one."
Soso hoisted the corpse one-handed like luggage. Twice her size, yet effortless.
"Sleep more. I'll call servants for cleanup."
Amazed by her skill beyond appearances. She'd saved my life, regardless.
"Incredible. Thanks."
At my praise, Soso's lips curved faintly.
"Not in secretary duties, as you said. You're welcome."
Drag-thud.
Soso hauled the body out. Silence returned. Heart pounding wildly, I pulled up the covers.
No mere stamper. The emperor's 'final dagger' for me. She was my night's most dangerous, reliable shield.
I closed my eyes again. Come morning, as if nothing happened, she'd pour tea and stamp for me.
Her dual nature felt oddly reassuring. A smile tugged my lips as I drifted off.