Chapter 79
Chapter 79
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Translator: Ryuma
Chapter: 79
Chapter Title: Loyal Retainers and Villains (2)
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I got to experience exactly the feeling those magistrates in Hamgyeong Province must have had when they suffered at my hands.
The secret royal inspector—no, Hanseong Judge Park Mun-su—was standing right at my door. I quickly shot Jangbok a glance, signaling him to secure the back door for a getaway.
Jangbok's face lit up with an "aha," and he hurried off to fetch a tray of liquor (moonshine).
You idiot, do you even know who Park Mun-su is? Looks like I'll have to thoroughly debug that glitch in him and push an update later.
Gritting my teeth, I shooed Jangbok away and welcomed Park Mun-su inside.
Most guests, steeped in old Joseon habits, would start heading toward the annex that Se-hwa and I now used as our room, only to sheepishly turn back after the servants politely explained.
But Park Mun-su was different. He glanced off in another direction.
Then, without even sitting, he fired his first shot.
"Looks like a new room's been added—one that seems like a guest hall for officials. A mere fifth-rank advisor's prestige rivals that of a prime minister, doesn't it?"
Hey, you're a high-ranking lord yourself—why act like a spiteful sergeant denying a private his stripes?
With so many people begging for recommendations to the Pyeongseon Hall position, especially spiking during the holidays, I had no choice but to shell out my hard-earned cash to build it.
I'd kept expansions to a minimum to avoid anyone envying my wealth. Sending my brother off to the salt flats meant we couldn't split households either. If I left too, we'd be branded as the unfilial brothers.
Wait a second—how does Park Mun-su even know about this?
"...Have you ever visited our house before, my lord?"
"I have. No need to rack your brains trying to remember—it was before you were even born. I'd love to catch up with Heohyojae (Kim Yonggyeom) after all this time, but it's late, so that might be rude. No need to go inside; how about we chat briefly in this splendid guest hall?"
I swallowed hard.
Not because I worried the ledger meticulously recording the etiquette of all those petitioners might still be open in there.
Kim Clan of Jangdong's smart cleaning system is pretty high-end. It would've mapped everything out without manual input.
The reason I was tense was Park Mun-su's level.
He was in a whole different league from the small fry.
More terrifying than his freakish memory was the gravitas of someone who'd visited scholars' homes across rival factions even before I was born.
I called Jangbok back and gave him precise instructions this time, leaving no room for errors.
* * *
Obviously, the only people who visit at this hour are powerhouses who couldn't care less about decorum.
But Pyeongseon Hall is a low-level sinecure, and most petitioners are of that caliber—none qualify here.
Thankfully, the guest hall was empty right now. No ledgers strewn about either.
Park Mun-su sat and surveyed the room. I trailed his gaze anxiously.
What would this elder of the Small Faction say to a upstart Noron like me?
Would it be the Hwani Dispute that split the Noron and Soron—the scandal where Yun Seon-geo's son Yun Jeong denounced Song Si-yeol for refusing to write his father's epitaph, leading to a rift among the Westerners?
No, that's too classical.
Maybe the more recent Gaejang Game, when Noron and Soron clashed ready to annihilate each other?
Even with the king's favor, Park Mun-su couldn't just bring that up anywhere.
At any rate, the fact that Park Mun-su had come to me instead of the king meant there was room for negotiation.
If he had a grudge against me, he'd have just told the king and gotten me axed.
A clean official like me might be tough for even a secret inspector like Park Mun-su to crack, but as I'd exploited myself, the world doesn't punish the guilty—it pins crimes on whoever they want to punish.
And the current Park Mun-su could reshape my reality to fit his whims.
Yet his opening line was surprisingly mundane.
"The guest hall's one thing, but the inlaid furniture inside looks impressive too, and that go board there to surprise guests is fine wood. You really are loaded, aren't you?"
I barely held back a cheer.
If my political funds were short, a mere glance from me would've had him delivering tribute on his own. Scaring folks at night like this—did he come in person because our factions cut off normal channels?
I cleared my throat in perfect form, bringing a loosely fisted hand to my mouth.
One "ahem" from me here, and Jangbok—lurking outside like a Dobu-su from behind a Chinese banquet curtain—would burst in wielding a weapon that'd bring anyone to their knees.
The finest wild ginseng on the market right now: mountain ginseng.
The stuff Yun Pil-deok gave me, yeah.
True ginseng's gone extinct in Joseon. Why else would folks risk their lives smuggling from Qing?
The problem is it doesn't keep long. I vaguely recall from the 21st century that steaming and drying turns it into red ginseng, but as a literary exam grad, I don't know how, and no one around me did either.
Probably some regional or clan secret, or an undiscovered method.
What, you think I should invent it and rake in the cash? Like stripping your house wiring to make superconducting copper coils? No way I'm gambling my precious ginseng on uncertain ventures.
Until some Joseonite invents a proper method, there's no helping it. Gotta use it soon anyway.
So if the other's Park Mun-su, no loss at all.
But Park Mun-su didn't fall for Kim Clan's feast.
He just smirked.
"It'd be a real shame to die without spending all that money."
My throat-clearing lodged right there.
Inspector Park Mun-su... was he always this type?
* * *
Of course, no matter how powerful Park Mun-su was, he couldn't take Kim Unhaeng's head over mere Pyeongseon Hall recommendations in peacetime.
That's what makes nobles accountable only to the king. Sucking the people's blood dry or beating them to death is no worse than damaging royal property. Execution requires treason.
But Park Mun-su had another card.
"Do you know where the rice you bought came from? The Equal Distribution Office. Despite the court's concerns, why do you think His Majesty approved your radical policy? Solely for the success of equal distribution—and ultimately, the achievement of impartial politics."
Park Mun-su didn't look at Kim Unhaeng's bowed head.
Thus, he had no clue Kim Unhaeng was seriously debating whether to summon Eoji and turn Yeongseong Earl into the late Yeongseong Earl.
So his warning proceeded in his usual style: bluntly and concisely, uncharacteristic for a Joseon man.
"If rats like you scurrying in and out of the Equal Distribution granaries multiply, His Majesty's sacred decree will fade, and the masses will curse impartial politics as a mistake. What do you think happens then?"
Kim Unhaeng's head flies, legal guilt be damned.
"Not for some grand 'Way of Righteousness,' and certainly not for petty personal gain—that'd be intolerable. The rampant rumors of Pyeongseon Hall bribes start right here as irrefutable proof, and digging into your Dragon Flower Guard days or old magistrate stint will uncover the rest. One sip reveals the whole pot. An exploiter doesn't stop at one victim."
At that moment, Kim Unhaeng lifted his face.
* * *
Yeah, honestly, it was a crisis.
Just a minute ago, my imagination had escalated to treason.
Tip off the Qing: "That bastard's still holding Ming emperor rites! Plotting to invade Shenyang too!" to get reinforcements. Prop up the dimwitted Sado Crown Prince next, right?
Higher odds of becoming Chief State Councillor via that route than getting impeached by Park Mun-su.
But thankfully, no need to go down in history as the ultimate traitor.
The moment he said "grand righteousness" and "petty personal gain," my counterweapon formed in my mind.
"My lord, forgive me, but did you just say 'personal gain'?"
"I did. Going to deny it?"
"Then by all means, right now—send your men to check our storehouses. See if the rice I supposedly hoarded is piled up as claimed."
Of course, Park Mun-su didn't actually summon Hanseong constables.
"Hah! You'd have moved it to other warehouses by now..."
"That rice was scattered to Chungcheong's poor folk days ago. Ties from marriage alliances, plus my old magistrate days as you mentioned. A quick 'investigation' and you'd know. With the famines hitting one after another, Chungcheong's no exception, as you know."
It's true.
Sent agents on long-term inn contracts down to Chungcheong.
Bought the rice with that swap in mind from the start.
Poor folk? Innkeepers have poor souls. That's how I see it.
Not just Chungcheong—Seoul too. I don't want to parrot excuses politicians use to pardon tax-dodging tycoons for cash, but thanks to me, at least 200 capital paupers got fed.
Se-hwa and I discussed it: I don't have much cash or rice myself. No debts, belly full, phone charged—that's plenty.
No bandwidth to fuss over money when chasing my desperate goal unknown to any Joseonites.
I've never skimped on investment capital. Chun-sik Group's ventures are spinning cash at terrifying speed even now.
"Pyeongseon Hall's the same. True, I met them before recommending. Even for a lowly post, endorsement is a national matter. Since ancient times, if the endorsed errs, the endorser shares blame. How could one accept every office-seeker's plea without knowing their character?"
Park Mun-su's face soured.
Your Soron does it too, not just our Noron.
Elders prattling to the king about kinsmen recommendations or rival smears—enough to make Yeongjo rage at factionalism.
But this Kim Unhaeng's different.
"My ventures serve the king above and people below. Letting merchants safely set up stalls, reducing peasant harassment of soldiers, providing farmhands for the landless—how's that comparable to granary rats?"
Park Mun-su bellowed.
"Nonsense! Talking of people while filling your own greed!"
I didn't flinch one bit.
I just tilted my head to gaze at the ceiling.
Rude before a lord, but needed for the mood.
"Lord Yeongseong."
"What?"
"I'm a subject too."
I didn't want to see Park Mun-su's face right now. Eyes fixed stubbornly on the doorpost, I continued.
"You, me—we're all subjects under one sagely king. Isn't that so? That's the ultimate impartial Way. Among subjects there are ranks, and it's a gentleman's duty to let holy grace flow downward like water."
"Never thought I'd hear impartial doctrine from a green upstart."
I ignored Park Mun-su.
His tone had already softened.
Yeah. Hard to argue against impartiality, right?
"Picture bowls stacked neatly: five at bottom, three above, one on top. Pour water—it fills the top first, but overflows to the rest.
But bottom bowls can't fill the top ones automatically. If I may be bold, worldly principles mirror this trickle-down. I may seem greedy now, but it's preparation to bestow on the lowly."
"Grandiose metaphor for empty words."
Damn, he's sharp.
Right—it's empty rhetoric.
But you can't refute it outright? Plenty still believe in the 21st century.
Even after IMF blew fortunes proving trickle-down looks good but doesn't work.
But Park Mun-su counters.
"Yao wore grass skirts in a thatched hut, carried loads with a dirt spade—yet people patted bellies and sang. Frugal rulers and emulating officials are governance's root. Why whitewash greed with clever talk?"
Wiser than IMF economists, it seems. Fitting for Inspector Park Mun-su.
No good—keep fighting this way, I lose.
I switched weapons.
Lowered my gaze to stare Park Mun-su straight on.
"If citing ancient kings' virtues, Yao had the Four Peaks, King Wu the Ten Uprisers."
I pivoted abruptly to politics.
Four Peaks and Ten Uprisers sound like Yao and Wu's martial elite squads, but they're actually era's famed ministers.
Come to think, wuxia clan's Southern Seven Heroes or Four Dragons Three Phoenixes are from classics too.
Politics is life-or-death like wuxia anyway.
"But where are such ministers in our court now? His Majesty sending handwritten edicts all year, yet the Left Councillor stays off the path— that's why, isn't it?"
Mentioning striking Left Councillor Lee Jong-seong shook Park Mun-su's face badly.
* * *
Lee Jong-seong: unquestioned Soron leader, son of former Left Councillor Lee Tae-jwa.
Lee Tae-jwa was Park Mun-su's teacher and maternal uncle.
In short, Lee Jong-seong and Park Mun-su are cousins by marriage.
Why's Park Mun-su Soron? His maternal clan: Lee Tae-jwa, and Lee Tae-jwa's cousin-by-marriage former Chief State Councillor Lee Gwang-jwa—Soron nobility. (Hence their frequent appearances in Inspector Park legends.)
But Lee Jong-seong's in deep political crisis now.
Park Mun-su and Lee Jong-seong weren't just in-laws—they were lifelong political allies through ups and downs.
Yet Noron demanded stripping (dead) Lee Tae-jwa's titles; son Lee Jong-seong fought back fiercely, putting Park Mun-su in a bind.
Chung vs. hyo: eternal debate, but history shows revered scholars mostly chose filial piety. Royal family itself: queen dowager or former king aren't subordinates.
Choosing loyalty over filial became publicly praised post-nationalism—"greater than self."
Commander Lee In-yeong assembling 13 provinces' righteous armies then leaving for dad's funeral got flak 'cause he lived at the ethics shift.
So Lee Jong-seong's act is "personally" right now.
Problem: not factionally.
King Lee Geum, hating to corner Soron, promoted Lee Jong-seong to Left Councillor instead.
Thinking court balance, he should've feigned refusal then accepted to stabilize.
But Lee Jong-seong's defied royal orders head-on for nearly a year.
Noron went wild. Impeachment storms against insolent Lee Jong-seong. Lee Geum ground teeth but defended desperately.
"Remember you Noron scum forcing me to pick: admit ancestor-killer or exterminate Soron, whining the king's shame lingers?"
Unleashing ultimate issues like "Army Without Mandate," "King's Roar," "King's Tears," "King's Inspection Refusal"—but Noron stayed hardline.
"You're the one not crushing Soron properly—that's why rumors fly!"
Retreat, and impartiality crumbles.
Lee Geum pulled his finisher: "Crown Prince Summon" skill activated.
He mercilessly scolded the summoned son, flexing corrective punch.
"You spout useless 'I'll reply per precedent' crap whenever ministers speak—that's why they lose fear and babble wildly!"
"All my fault."
Prince prostrated, sobbing. Inherited dad's flair? Who knows.
August pavement's no bedwarmer. Epidemics raging; prince had measles before.
If prince sickened or died, king could pin it on Noron (he'd rejoice at child's death for that). Moderate Won Gyeongha mediated a truce.
But time's ticking.
Screw face or filial—Lee Jong-seong must return ASAP, shield Soron from Noron filth.
Or second-in-command Park Mun-su steps up.
Else, fed-up king might ditch Soron.
Original history: no choice. After years of Yeongjo's handwritten wooing, Lee Jong-seong returns.
But now: one variable.
Kim Unhaeng's sparked impartiality and equal distribution's unprecedented success (apparent).
King Lee Geum can wield it to cow ministers.
"Behold—impartiality! Obey my sage guidance, foolish servants!"
Noron snarls soften. For that, dubious "Three Policies" must succeed perfectly.
Kim Unhaeng convinced Park Mun-su.
No need for long excuses or slick talk from the start.
No point irking him by naming Soron giants like Lee Tae-jwa, Lee Gwang-jwa, Lee Jong-seong.
Why would a Hanseong Judge bother a lowly official over rice hoarding pettiness?
Park Mun-su was that desperate.
In the end, he erred by silently hearing Kim Unhaeng out.
"—So, the last of the Three Policies, unknown save to His Majesty. Unlike the others, He deems only a trusted able minister like you can execute it—hence unimplemented."
"Oh? Is that so?"
Kim Unhaeng whispered like from the abyss.
"Care to join my venture?"
Park Mun-su nodded.
Author's Note
1. Yeongjo flew into rages whenever snide missives arrived from offices like the Shengjing Bureau (managing Shenyang, exchanged letters with Joseon court like Beijing's Rites Ministry) over border issues.
Records show him summoning night envoys with Shenyang experience, grilling on watchtowers or troop numbers—claiming rude language. Purely for face-saving; he knew best invading Shenyang was impossible. Lord-vassal duo formally fumed and dissuaded in benevolent theater.
2. Yeongjo often urgently summoned the Crown Prince—unrelated to fights—when cornered by ministers. Prince rolling, wailing "my fault," forced retreats multiple times.
All depicted here happened around late August, Yeongjo 28. Scolding prince over standard "per precedent" replies out of fear matches too.