Holy, an Apostle, and a Disciple - 1
Cardinal Alexandriana appeared like a gust of wind, and she seemed determined to vanish the same way—she opened her mouth without the slightest hesitation.
"It has been decided that both of you will be raised to the rank of Apostle through Beatification. This is a matter I judged proper as Prefect of the Congregation for the Causes of Saints, and His Holiness the Pope granted final approval yesterday."
Personally I preferred the Cardinal's direct manner of speaking over the usual roundabout nonsense. Civil-servant jargon was something you only used because the job forced you to; hearing someone else do it still made me feel like a dog.
Even so, when the information being delivered was this heavy, a little gravity wouldn't have hurt. She said it so casually that for a second I thought she was about to tell me Beatification or Canonization was out of the question. Was that really the face of a Cardinal announcing a Beatification?
"Furthermore, should the two of you return to Enen's side, Canonization proceedings will begin at once. That will not change even if someone other than the current Holy Father sits on the papal throne, so you need not worry."
I felt my eyelids twitch. An Apostle while alive, a Saint the moment we die?
What the hell is that?
I'd never heard of a pattern like this in my life. Please, for the love of everything, do not drop something that weighty as if it were small talk.
Thank god I came out alone.
A wave of relief washed over me that only the Cardinal and I were present. Mar happened to be inspecting the newly purchased supplies, so I'd stepped out by myself. If she had been standing here too, her brain would have locked up solid.
Even I, a man from another world, was reeling. For native-born Mar the shock would have been worse, never better.
"You seem quite surprised."
Through it all the Cardinal kept smiling as she asked.
"...Well, it isn't exactly an everyday occurrence. I am a little startled, yes."
It was an obvious question, so I answered honestly. Being Beatified while still alive was already enormous; guaranteed Canonization after death was something I had never even heard of.
No—if Canonization was already locked in, why not just do it while we were still breathing? Or hold the Beatification after death instead. What kind of situation was this?
"I understand. Cardinal Aldino also questioned my proposal at first."
The Cardinal gave a soft chuckle, then carefully bent at the waist—as formally as a subordinate greeting a superior.
At this latest eccentricity my body froze instead of my head. The only people a Cardinal was supposed to bow to were Enen, the Pope, and the Emperor. Offering a full waist-bow rather than a mere nod of the head to a mere noble like me was excessive courtesy.
"Your Eminence, please raise your head. How can one who follows the Lord's teachings behave this way toward an ordinary believer?"
I forced my wits back into place and voiced my discomfort. Part of me wanted to grab her shoulders and haul her upright, but that would have been rude in its own right.
Yet contrary to my flustered heart, the Cardinal continued in a perfectly calm voice.
"Although the condition of death is attached, the fact that Canonization has been confirmed means the two of you already possess the qualifications of Saints. Nevertheless, for reasons of the Church's circumstances we stopped at Beatification. As a servant who follows the Lord's teachings, how could I not feel shame?"
And with that, the roughly fifty-degree bow deepened to about sixty-five degrees.
I was going to lose my mind. I could barely get her to stand, and now I'd made her bow even lower.
"Brother, you are one who, having received the Lord's blessing, rightfully belongs among the Saints. Yet because of human circumstances we have pulled you down to the rank of Apostle. I beg you to accept my apology."
Watching a Cardinal behave less like a Cardinal before a believer and more like a believer before a Saint made it hard to open my mouth.
I was really, truly glad only I was here...
There was a small—no, an enormous—commotion, but it was settled quickly enough. The moment I said I accepted the apology, she rose as if cut by a knife.
My head was still spinning, yet by carefully considering the Cardinal's position I managed to grasp it. In imperial terms it was like a sitting minister bowing his head to a commoner who had just been granted the title of Ribnoman Count. Even a minister who stayed stiff-necked before a Ribnoman Count would earn the imperial household's wrath and every curse under the sun.
Yeah... she had every reason to bow.
The throbbing in my skull gradually eased.
"Beatification and Canonization are the exclusive authority of His Holiness the Pope, so I cannot Beatify you here and now. The Congregation for the Causes of Saints exists only to select those worthy of reverence and report them to His Holiness. Please understand."
"Of course I understand. I'm a bureaucrat myself; I can more than follow that."
My half-joking reply drew a quiet laugh from the Cardinal.
No matter how much people talked about imperial ministers or Prefects of the Holy Kingdom, in the end they were still civil servants trapped in a bureaucracy. Only a civil servant truly knew a civil servant's pain.
"It is fortunate that Brother is a minister. I thank you for your mercy."
The word "mercy" slipped out so naturally that I almost gave a bitter smile. Even her choice of vocabulary was now saturated with reverence.
"Ah—the Beatification ceremony will be held at St. Togra Cathedral. Of course the subjects of the Beatification are under no obligation to attend, so you may simply await the result in comfort within the Empire."
Apparently ready to leave, the Cardinal quickly explained the schedule for the ceremony.
St. Togra Cathedral was the symbol of the Dawn Church, located in the Holy Kingdom. I had been fretting over whether we would have to travel all the way there, but thankfully an overseas trip would not be necessary.
"And this is a small token of sincerity from me, as Prefect of the Congregation for the Causes of Saints, to a future Saint."
So saying, the Cardinal stepped closer, placed her left hand over her own heart and her right hand upon my head, and began to recite a prayer.
Before long a white radiance bloomed from her hand; it seemed she was bestowing a blessing—
—Ack, that startled me.
?
In that instant both the Cardinal and I froze solid.
I froze because a familiar voice rang out inside my head; the Cardinal froze because she had sensed the aura of a heretical faith emanating from a future Saint.
...Ah, so it's one of Enen's children. Something prickled all of a sudden and I wondered what it was.
The voice quickly grasped the situation and spoke in its usual languid, peaceful tone, but I was anything but peaceful.
"Brother...?"
The Cardinal's eyes, having detected another god's power inside my body, looked dangerous.
An Apostle (heretic). Even I had to admit it sounded horrific.
Damn it.
Stay calm. The fact that I had formed a connection with a heretical god in the North, and that the northern deity had intervened in the revival of the World Tree, was already known to both the Empire and the Dawn Church. Therefore a high-ranking Cardinal would certainly have heard of the Eternal Blue Sky.
Right now she was simply startled by the sudden appearance of an Apostle (heretic) and had put on crusader eyes; once I explained properly the misunderstanding would clear.
It absolutely would.
I blankly watched the elf praying in front of me—or more precisely, in front of the tree I inhabited. I had no physical body, yet if I did I would probably have been sprawled on the ground scratching my belly. The scene was that familiar.
"Our Mother Constantina, Eternal Blue Sky who guards the World Tree. We give thanks once more today for the mercy that entrusted the great duty of tending the World Tree to us lowly mortals."
Having finished her prayer, the elder of the elf race lifted her enormous shears again to trim the branches.
I felt a little awkward. From the day I first settled into this tree until now, that elder had prayed and pruned every single day. Of course I knew perfectly well what Constantina meant to the elves and what the World Tree she had bestowed upon them represented, so I never thought the devotion excessive.
If someone cut a person's hair this often they'd go bald.
I merely wondered whether she was pruning a bit too frequently.
Strange. She snipped every day, so how was there still something left to cut? Was she secretly gluing new branches on when I wasn't looking?
"Eternal Blue Sky, is there anywhere that feels uncomfortable?"
...No. This is just the house I stay in, not my body.
"Understood. Still, should any discomfort arise, please tell me at any time."
Watching the elder smile as she snipped made it hard to say, "I'm fine, so stop." I had seen countless worshippers in my time as a god; devotees of this temperament only grew depressed and wilted if you told them to quit.
So what could I do? Even if it irritated me, I had to endure and accept it.
"Sky Auntie! Sky Auntie!"
"Good morning, good morning!"
These little ones, however, I could not endure.
Roused by the sound of the elder's shears, the previously quiet fairies came pouring out and began buzzing around the vicinity.
Please, please be quiet. I really hated being tormented first thing in the morning...
"Auntie! Auntie! How many days left? When does our house grow back?"
"How many days? How many days?"
The fairies' endless chatter today made me want to snort with laughter.
My fate really was twisted. If I'd had even one proper temple, I wouldn't have ended up living under the harassment of fairies.
Just sleep another three thousand five hundred nights or so.
"Three thousand five hundred? Really? Really?"
How should I know? Constantina made the World Tree, not me.
Yeah.
I swallowed the urge to say exactly that and managed a reply.
Calculating the exact figure was difficult, but I knew it would be ten years at most. So three thousand five hundred wasn't wrong.
"What about five hundred? Can't it be five hundred?"
"Five hundred! Five hundred!"
Five hundred instead of three thousand? Isn't that a little much?
Their haggling technique was pure art. Constantina had taught them well.
Time to run.
Just as my mind was starting to go blank, I clung to my fading consciousness and prepared to flee to my secret base.
I had held out for a while, but today was impossible. I needed to hop into the body of my honorary high priest for a bit.
If I can just last three hours...
The fairies were overflowing with energy, yet if I left my post for a full three hours they would lose interest and start playing among themselves. They always had before.
So I gathered my focus and headed for the body of my reserve high priest—
—Ack, that startled me.
The moment I entered the body, a sharp, hot sensation made me jump.
My small, precious secret base had been defiled.
"Indeed. So this is the aura of the Eternal Blue Sky."
Hearing one of Enen's children murmur with open interest sent a little wave of sorrow through me.
The first thing I meet the instant I escape is a child of Enen's side. I came here to rest and instead I'm being tormented by some new kid.
"I was startled that Brother carried the aura of a heretical faith, yet if it is the Eternal Blue Sky then there is no problem. She contributed to the revival of the World Tree, after all."
On top of that, she wasn't even Enen herself but merely one of His underlings, yet she still spoke as if she were evaluating me. It hurt.
I used to be a thriving god once upon a time too. Once a month I received sacrifices of hundreds, even thousands of cattle and horses.
...I hate settled folk.
—What are you talking about while you're inside a settled person's body?
I grumbled under my breath, but this cold-hearted honorary high priest only returned a curt reply.
I really was going to cry.