Losers Struggle Just Looking at Each Other's Faces - 3
I tried to bolt the moment it felt like I was being drafted as a senior minister for the next emperor's deathbed decree, but the Crown Princess caught me with a casual invitation to stay for a meal. When someone tells you to eat before you go, you don't really have a choice.
Truthfully, a polite refusal would have been fine. Breakfast at someone else's house first thing in the morning was a little much, and for all I knew the Crown Princess was only being courteous. The problem was that our last exchange had essentially been, You are livestock to be bequeathed to my child. Running away after that would have been asking for trouble.
If the conversation ended on that note, the Crown Prince and Crown Princess would keep circling the topic, and the inheritance of a certain civil servant might stop being an offhand remark and become an actual plan. That had to be stopped.
"Sharing a meal from the morning like this—it almost feels as if we've become family. Truly, nothing could be more reassuring."
The Crown Prince's laugh-laced remark made my teeth ache. Family, my ass. What a piece of work.
"Your Highness flatters me beyond measure. How could you say such a thing to a subject who is nothing more than a guest?"
"Even a guest, given enough time, becomes family in all but name. I have no doubt the Audit Department Chief will prove to be precisely that sort of guest to the Imperial Family."
The words raised goosebumps all over again. Wasn't that just a slave-owner's mindset—keep the man on active duty forever and feed him from the same trough? You evil bastard. In your next life, may you get a boss exactly like yourself.
"Heehee. Who knows? Perhaps we really will become family."
And with the Crown Princess's finishing blow, all I could manage was an awkward smile. As ghastly as the Crown Prince's words were, hers, unfortunately, had a non-trivial chance of coming true.
From her perspective I was a trusted friend of her father, the Duke of Victory. From the Crown Prince's side I was from an Imperial Count house that had sworn loyalty for three hundred years. Considering how much trouble the current Emperor had with the families of both his Empress and his consorts, I would look like a reasonably safe option.
Of course I wanted no part of it. I was already losing my mind—how much worse would it get if I were tied to the Imperial Family? People would start talking about too much power concentrated in one house, and the checks would—
Wait. That's actually good?
If I got checked, wasn't that perfect? What better pretext could there be for submitting a resignation letter?
A sudden calm settled over me. Still, my conscience twinged at the thought of actively pushing a political marriage, so I could only hope one of my children turned out charming enough to bewitch a member of the Imperial Family... or that an imperial grandchild bewitched one of mine. Either worked.
"My wife is right. The Audit Department Chief's house has nothing left but prosperity ahead of it. It would not be strange at all if his children one day joined with the Imperial Family."
Strange. It was essentially the same thing the Crown Princess had said, yet coming from the Crown Prince it sounded thoroughly sinister. Maybe the messenger really does matter more than the message.
"That aside, I do envy you, Audit Department Chief. With so many wives, you must feel the joy of children many times over."
Watching the Crown Prince burst out laughing, I was certain of it. The messenger was the problem. From anyone else it would have been a blessing; from this bastard it was pure provocation.
But what could I do? Rank was a bully—I couldn't curse him to his face, and with the Crown Princess watching I hesitated even to snipe at him sideways. All I could do was smile and endure.
Still, thanks to that little remark about wives, someone would step in to rein him in without me having to lift a finger.
"So Your Highness is saying that having fewer wives means less happiness."
Her voice was oddly colder than before. The Crown Prince's laughing face froze solid exactly as it was.
Idiot.
My heart lightened at remarkable speed. Serves you right for running your mouth.
In high spirits I finished the meal and escaped the Crown Prince's palace. There had been a small incident that left the Crown Princess displeased, but since every drop of that fury was aimed squarely at the Crown Prince, I was free to watch in comfort.
What a loser. A man with one wife bringing up the number of wives—wasn't that a spectacular self-destruct? Anyone listening could easily take it as envy of a man with many wives. Happily—no, regrettably—the Crown Princess was among those who took it that way.
I hoped this would teach the Crown Prince to watch his mouth. They say the mouth is the door through which disaster enters, don't they?
He'll manage somehow.
For all his spectacular self-sabotage just now, before his investiture he had survived the Second Prince faction's insane assassination campaigns. The man was a grandmaster of reading the room. Of course he knew how to mind his tongue.
Thinking that only made me angrier. It meant he'd been so focused on needling me that he'd let his guard down. Was he actually insane?
Son of a bitch.
Fortunately, the dark thoughts didn't last long.
"Chieeeeef!"
There was no room to think about the Crown Prince when I was seeing the First Department Head for the first time in ages.
She came flying out of the Masalo family mansion. On a weekday I'd have had to go all the way to the Audit Department to see her, but being the weekend she was home. I'd half-worried she might have gone in on her day off; I was glad she hadn't.
"Been well?"
I waved and greeted her as she came.
"We talked just yesterday. Of course I've been well!"
"Talking and seeing each other in person aren't the same thing."
At that she grinned and jabbed me in the side with her finger. Apparently she rather liked what I'd said.
"Hehe. Still, if you miss me so much you come all the way to the Imperial Capital, that's a problem~ Our Chief isn't failing to adjust to the Academy, is he?"
Sorry, but I was adjusting just fine. Unlike last year I had labor force up through Unit Three, so things were incredibly easy. Honestly, even my memories of the capital had started to get a little fuzzy.
Of course, telling her that would have her flopping on the floor and wailing, so I held my tongue.
"I came up to see Her Highness the Crown Princess."
That didn't mean I intended to hide the truth. Without the news about the imperial grandchild, I wouldn't have come up today.
"Wow. So the Imperial Family matters more than your lover?"
"Yep."
The First Department Head protested as if hurt; my answer was short and firm. We both burst out laughing for a moment.
She was right that the Imperial Family mattered more. They signed our paychecks. What could possibly outrank that?
"But since you came all the way to the mansion, I'll still see you!"
"Good. Thanks."
She wasn't truly upset; she simply linked arms with me and moved on. She was the one who'd told me the Crown Princess was pregnant in the first place, so she'd probably expected me in the capital today.
"Come inside first! It's still morning—it's cold!"
Beaming, she grabbed my arm and hauled me into the mansion.
Humming under my breath, I prepared tea and snacks. I could have left it to the maids, but it had been so long since I'd seen the Chief that I wanted to do it with my own hands. They say it only really moves a lover's heart when you take care of him yourself.
Given my preference I would have prepared a full meal, but my skills weren't there yet, so I gave up. You can't turn a precious meal into an adventure. Even if the Chief would eat just about anything, anyone would rather give him something delicious.
Maybe I should learn pastry-making too?
Looking at the sweets on the plate, I considered it seriously.
The Chief was already eating Luise's baking often enough, and lately even Beatrix had started making cookies. If the other lovers were handing him homemade treats and I was serving store-bought ones, the comparison would be inevitable.
Right. Whenever I had time, I'd study a little. Beatrix picked it up quickly enough—there was no reason I couldn't.
"Is black tea all right?"
"Aren't you supposed to ask that before you brew it?"
At the cold reply I stuck out my lower lip. This was the part where he was supposed to say, Anything you brew is fine.
"Anything's fine, just give it to me."
Close enough, I decided. I'd let it slide.
Yes—expecting a refined sense of romance from a little brother younger than me was asking too much. This older sister would endure.
"It's been a while since I've seen store-bought."
When I set the snacks down, the Chief said it with a faint smile, and my heart dropped.
He was probably teasing rather than scolding, but hearing that right when I was fretting over pastry skills left me anxious all the same.
I have to start studying right away.
The moment the Chief left, I would begin. Not "when I have time"—I would make the time.
"Store-bought has a consistent flavor, you know."
"That's true enough."
I answered as casually as I could. If I looked rattled, he'd feel awkward too.
"Oh, right. Penelia said she'll be back before evening."
I spoke lightly while he was drinking his tea. Saying it meant he'd go see her in the afternoon, but Penelia hadn't seen the Chief in just as long. I couldn't monopolize him.
"Really? Sooner than I expected."
"With dragons the hard part is piercing the scales. Drawing the blood itself is quick."
Surprisingly, Penelia and the Dark Light Squad weren't on a northern deployment this time; they were on a domestic assignment. They were currently harvesting dragon blood, a high-tier material for mages.
Drawing a dragon's blood required piercing its scales, so not just anyone could do it—but once you got through, the rest was quick. With Penelia's ability, she could wrap it up and be home soon enough.
"This time it was four of them, wasn't it?"
"Yes. Penelia only took the dragons living near the Imperial Capital. Other units handled the rest."
The Chief nodded calmly. Poor Penelia, though. Even one dragon would be a hassle, and she'd taken four.
Then again, they said ten of them used to live near the capital alone, so maybe this counted as fortunate?
I simply nodded along to the First Department Head's explanation. Six years into life in this world, and talk of dragons still left me conflicted.
In most stories dragons are either majestic beings or irredeemable embodiments of evil. Either way, they are overwhelming powerhouses no human can oppose. The dragons of this world were not that. More precisely, they had been—and then they weren't.
Around the early days of Apels, human magic and technology advanced by leaps and bounds until they reached a level capable of hunting dragons. Even then a campaign meant bracing for heavy losses, but there is a world of difference between an unbeatable foe and a farmable boss mob.
Those Apels bastards, honestly.
Among the continent's historians and biologists there is a saying: If something strange happens and you look into it, half the time Apels is the culprit. It reminded me of a certain country from before my transmigration—though in this world Apels had actually been rather more decent than that country.
The moment dragon-hunting looked viable, they launched campaigns without a second thought for casualties, and during the Apels era dragon numbers crashed spectacularly. People seriously wondered if the species was going extinct.
Any number of things followed after that, but the ending was that the dragons, thoroughly sick of Apels, joined hands with Crefelofen and brought Apels down. They say the Great Emperor Aimanka rode the Dragon Lord of his day while commanding his armies.
In any case, the dragons who had suffered under Apels struck a grand bargain with Crefelofen, and one of the terms was the periodic provision of blood. A peculiar compromise: better to live long and give regularly than die once and yield everything in a single haul—so leave us alone.
"Back at the founding there were even dragons living in the Imperial Palace, but these days they all stay in mountains or caves, so it's a hassle."
She added that if they'd still lived in the palace the way they used to, Penelia would have finished in no time—but I barely heard her.
Dragons living in the Imperial Palace... what on earth would that even look like...