005 – Superstar at the Company Dinner! #1
In my freshman year of college, Professor Zeus had given us this absurd assignment while teaching us wide-eyed newbies.
"Which Greek god would make the best spouse?"
"Write a 5,000-character essay."
The results were unexpected. The female classmates' pick for the 'best catch in Greek mythology' was none other than the terrifying god Hades.
Among the philandering Greek gods, he stood out for his relatively family-oriented side. Strict to a fault, but endlessly soft and affectionate with his wife—apparently, it reminded them of the 'northern duke' archetype. It made sense when you thought about it. This Soul Society's CEO was a rare devoted husband and doting father among the gods.
Just look at how he, who never allowed the dead to return to life, conditionally permitted Eurydice's revival at his wife's tearful request, moved by Orpheus's music.
And the golden child born to that wife: Melinoë.
The CEO probably loved his daughter so much he wouldn't mind if she poked him in the eye.
Here's the problem. What if some punk dared to lay a hand on that daughter?
And what if that punk was me?
Oops.
I might end up suffering a punishment worse than death at the fearsome CEO's hands. Maybe they'd stack an extra boulder next to Sisyphus's and make me roll it forever.
As I tensed up, our great princess Melinoë squinted her pomegranate-red eyes at the artificial sun hanging from the ceiling.
"I heard this Happy World was dark and gloomy due to power shortages. But that mechanical sun proves otherwise. Sisyphus's guidance, I suppose? And this guy made it happen."
"Yes! The underworld sun now shines brilliantly! The ghost staff dorms have steady power, boosting work efficiency over threefold—all thanks to Jo Iseo!"
Bones Manager bowed deeply. He even rattled off the story of how I'd stumbled upon a gold vein by chance.
"What a guy! Not even two winters since joining, but we couldn't run the Penalty Execution Department without him now!"
In dramas about office life, bosses steal their subordinates' credit. Did this bonehead have no such greed?
Only Crates, the ace of Penalty Execution Team 1, shouted with obvious resentment.
"But he was late on a day like today? And he reeks of booze."
True. I was late. That was undeniable fact.
Then—grab—the princess of hell seized my shoulder.
"I didn't know the layout here, but this guy helped me find the company. We could've been on time, but I lost my wallet..."
She clamped her mouth shut. Clearing her throat with a ahem, she corrected herself.
"The delay was my fault for force-feeding him too much last night. Sisyphus Energy hit the jackpot, making drinks free, so we went all out."
"Huh? Free drinks?"
Crates gaped. But Bones Manager grinned his bony grin in admiration.
"Indeed!!! So, Jo Iseo, you attended to Lady Melinoë starting last night! Worked overtime past 6 p.m.? Exemplary employee! First time I've seen such loyalty! Everyone, take note!"
"Working after hours?"
"Staying up all night keeping the boss company? Man, I couldn't do that."
......
How did it turn into this?
Marquius patted my shoulder, oblivious to my turmoil.
"Buddy, did you read my note and scour every bar after work to find where the execs were? Respect—this Marquius approves."
Marquius's info? I'd checked the office mailbox and found a note.
I dug up some info that might help you. The new exec loves booze. From your dear colleague, Marquius—
If I'd seen it before leaving yesterday, things might've gone differently. Maybe recalculated odds and changed plans.
As I stood there slack-jawed like a scam victim, the nightmare goddess Melinoë patted my shoulder.
"Exemplary employee Jo Iseo. I'll be watching your moves from now on."
"...I'm honored."
I was marked by the nightmare goddess. We'd even spent the night together. Truly do-or-die.
Nightmare days awaited me.
What a Happy World!
Apollo is the sun god. In the Greek worldview, he sometimes represented the sun itself. Gods were like that—embodiments of their domains. Anthropomorphism, you could say.
What about the nightmare goddess Melinoë? She ruled nightmares and was nightmares incarnate.
When she arrived as a senior exec in Happy World, I thought nightmare days would begin—
That was my initial thought. But two weeks after the new exec's arrival, my life was oddly the same. Peaceful, even.
"Jo Iseo! Sisyphus petitioned to increase his boulder weight! What did you do to make that guy such a model prisoner? You're one scary fellow!"
"Jo Iseo! Prisoners' penalty compliance doubled listening to Orpheus's songs!"
"Jo Iseo!"
"Jo—."
"Jooji!"
"Joo-gee!"
Of course, paperwork piled higher, and hell cockroaches wailed their chunky cries as always. But no major changes in Happy World's routine.
I'm scared of how used to this I'm getting. Is human potential limitless?
Odd jobs under Professor Zeus for my master's ironically helped here. But Happy World was still hell—never let your guard down.
Like now.
"Dinner with Executive VP Melinoë today. Wrap up by 4 p.m. and head there—no absences!"
Clack! Bones Manager's jawbones clapped like thunder, spreading the news.
Dinner with the nightmare goddess. Felt like a hole burning through my stomach.
Things were so quiet lately.
Though she'd arrived, our paths hadn't crossed—me a lowly agent, her the fearsome CEO's daughter and senior exec.
What were the odds a subsidiary agent would rub elbows with HQ CEO's daughter?
The problem: I'd beaten those odds, drinking with her and spending the night.
Thinking of it chilled my blood; even that tasty booze turned bitter.
We've acted like nothing happened since... but.
The 'nothing' unnerved me. A simple "Forget that night" or "One-night fling—keep it secret" from her would ease my mind.
That's why I hadn't rushed my Olympus transfer op lately.
Hell, I barely remembered what happened—too drunk.
Maybe literally nothing? Just slept?
I hoped so. Why? In Greek lore, mortal men tangled with goddesses ended like Orion—one word explains it. Died, became a constellation.
I wanted out of Happy World to lofty Olympus, but not as a star.
All because of nymphs.
Had I known Melinoë was a nymph that night, I'd have suspected exec status and stayed wary. But her ears weren't pointy like a nymph's, so I relaxed.
Goddess and nymph?
Goddess and nymph? Different species—like cat-dog hybrid. Gods were weird like that.
Thus, for my sanity and Olympus plan: avoid gods at all costs. Lucky me, a peon; execs (gods) were too lofty to glimpse casually.
"Jo Iseo! As last year's top employee, you're seated next to the execs! You know underlings can't just sit anywhere at dinner. What an honor!"
Clack! Clack! Bones's teeth chattered.
Cold sweat poured down my back.
"Argh! Stomachache—gonna bail early from dinner. Sorry. Oof, hurts so bad! Must be bad food yesterdayyy—."
"No worries! Got a fruit that fixes gut pain like magic—from Sisyphus. Protein shakes make my lower belly grumble."
Damn! Couldn't even escape dinner. Why did a skeleton need protein shakes?
Thus, inevitably, I sat next to execs—like a private next to the division commander.
Kill me.
Even death might not escape Happy World.
As tears welled sadly, Bones admired.
"That thrilled for exec seats? Your loyalty burns in my bones, Jo Iseo! But heed this—."
His skull eyes glowed blue.
"Two rules for exec dinners."
Bones folded bony fingers one by one.
Click.
"One: Don't speak till they address you. Two: Never leave your seat first."
He patted my back lightly.
"Follow those, you're golden. Minor etiquette too, but you'll handle it."
"What if I slip?"
"Hits your eval hard. If they get offended... worst case, you're stripped bare. Lose this glorious job...!"
Bones shuddered like it was a curse.
Marquius and staff trembled hearing it.
"Fired for a slip? No thanks to exec seats."
"In Soul Society, one misstep and you're done."
"Fired here? Sinks you deeper. Rehire? Tough..."
Now, my to-dos were clear: two things!