042 – Feng Shui Matters Too
The morning after the shocking news that Happy World's president, Thanatos, had betrayed us.
The office was in unprecedented chaos.
"Well then, everyone, it's time for me to say goodbye. Thanks for everything."
Vroom-vroom-vroom.
Marquius waved to us all. The guy who'd show up every day just to trade lame jokes was actually a department head at HQ? What a shocker.
I thought I'd finally adapted to this Happy World. But there were still plenty of surprises left, enough to make me worry about my heart health.
Happy World wasn't a place you adapted to. It was one you had to escape.
"Jo."
"Yes, Department Head."
"Just call me Marquius. We're friends, right?"
Flip.
He handed me his business card.
SAFETY MANAGEMENT
Department Head – Marquius
"Come find me at HQ. Our Safety Management team has strict access controls—no one's getting in without clearance. But you? I've got a good feeling you'll make it."
Into Zagreus's direct command? Once you're in there, you'd never shake free from this underworld.
Terrifying stuff.
"Alright, everyone—see you around someday!"
With his thief-like ugly mug, Marquius packed his things and left the office.
The staff buzzed in his wake.
"Marquius was an HQ department head? I still can't believe it."
"Sounds fake."
"Did you know from the start, Vice Manager Jo? Is that why you were so nice to him?"
"Different caliber."
Clap-clap.
Then Bones the Department Head clapped with his bony hands.
"Alright, back to work, everyone! Happy World never stops, no matter the crisis! Hedone, get me the new prisoner catalog before lunch!"
Back to the daily grind. As if.
"What happens to Happy World now?"
"The president's seat is empty."
"Will Melinoë take over? Or send someone new from HQ?"
The employees whispered. I was just as curious.
Soon Bones approached and patted my shoulder.
"Vice Manager Jo, wanna step out for a smoke?"
Smoke? I don't even smoke.
But I didn't refuse. A smoke break during work hours? Perfect excuse to slack off.
"This situation is pretty serious. Blood winds are blowing through HQ and all subsidiaries alike. Countless folks are losing jobs and hitting the streets. A storm's brewing."
A storm? No idea. My surroundings were so peaceful, it was eerie. Why skip me with that bloody gale? Hit me already.
"Of course, that storm might turn into a tailwind for you. You know various HQ departments have their eyes on you—especially Safety Management."
Bones, the bare skeleton, puffed away on his cigarette. How, without lungs? Mystery.
"HQ Safety Management is basically under Zagreus Prince's direct command. Get in there, and your life blooms for real. Smooth sailing ahead."
Smooth sailing? Hell no. Not what I want.
"Department Head, I love Happy World and the Penalty Execution Department too much to leave. If I have to go, I'll quit on the spot!"
"...Jo, your loyalty and camaraderie bring tears to my eyes! But we're not the vessel to hold a talent like you. Turbulent times are coming. You need the big pond."
No! Don't send me to HQ! Especially not Safety Management. Why? Because Marquius, who overrates me for some reason, runs it. He'd pile on achievements with lame excuses. No firing—just endless promotions.
Chilling just thinking about it.
Flutter.
Then Bones pulled a paper from between his ribs.
"Got an order recommending you to HQ. Direct from the CEO. Haven't told everyone yet, but you have to leave us...."
From the Chairman himself? Even a quirky bone wizard like Bones couldn't ignore that.
"He's right."
Whoosh.
Princess Melinoë phased through the wall. Every ghost entrance shaved ten years off my life.
She elegantly tapped her forehead.
"Jo, you're heading to HQ with me."
"Wait, you're going too, Lady Melinoë?"
"Yes. Unprecedented—President Thanatos rebelled. New executives are coming to Happy World to clean up. All Protogenoi grade."
Protogenoi. Primordials, zero-generation beings even King of Gods Zeus couldn't touch—like Gaia. (Note: Night goddess Nixdoty is one too.)
"With them handling cleanup, Happy World stabilizes fast. Your problem, Jo. HQ's full of execs who despise you."
Hated by scary bosses. My motivation dipped... then perked up.
Wait, perfect? They'd all scramble to find dirt and fire me.
Sounds great.
"Especially the 'Night Faction.' They're gunning for you. The audit tanked Apate Executive Director, exposed Thanatos' betrayal—their prestige took a massive hit."
HQ Audit Team. They'd hunt me with zeal.
Perfect. Decision made.
"Department Head, with your pull, you can write a recommendation, right? If HQ's inevitable, I want to pick my path."
"A rec letter? Sure. Got a department in mind? For Safety Management, ask Marquius—he's more direct."
Someone asked where I wanted to go.
Someone answered: neutral ground.
Not me. The battlefield.
I had a ton of stuff. Gifts from my promotion to manager. Gifts from my promotion to vice manager.
Boxing them up seemed endless.
"Vice Manager, don't forget us when you go."
Ing-ing.Hedone bawled.
Soon employees sniffled everywhere. Did they hate parting with me that much?
"Idiots. Why cry? Be happy I'm leaving. I was nothing but trouble for you. Planned to be, and might still."
Chowooji.
Chowooji.
I scanned the office: hell cockroaches and shady lost souls everywhere.
Two years here. Thought leaving would feel refreshing. Why the reluctance now?
"Marquius left. Now you too, Vice Manager Jo? Penalty Execution'll feel empty. Sure, new hires and sprouts will come...."
Pat.Bones hand on my back.
"Your hero tales will become legend and myth among our staff and newbies. Working with you... was truly... an honor."
"Vice Manager!"
"Vice Manager Jo, don't gooo!"
Pile-on.
Surrounded, I couldn't breathe. Fools. I'd caused so much hassle to get fired. (My plans all flopped, somehow.)
So much happened.
"These two years? Unforgettable forever. Bones Department Head. Hedone. Makaria. Tartarus crew. Absent ones like Marquius, Crates. Prisoners like Sisyphus, old man Cronus—."
How could I forget? Even as a skeleton or memory-lost ghost.
Unfair. Why did an ordinary human like me suffer with everyone?
Maybe that's why. Tears welled deep in my chest.
Couldn't even get fired. Ended up heading to HQ.
My tears turned the place into a sob-fest.
"Jo Vice Manager, why skip this Crowzer's name? Our houses are close—we'll see each other daily, but still."
"Farewell, Penalty Execution!"
"Visit often!"
"Bye!"
I slipped out.
Hated Happy World to death. But leaving? A twinge of regret.
"Gasp!"
Regret what? Anyway, HQ from Happy World seemed smart.
'Bad location vibes, right?'
Happy World was it. Bad feng shui kept promoting me skyward.
HQ might differ. Can't ignore feng shui.
I entered HQ.
Threw open my new office door—
Dozens of eerie glares locked on me.
"Gutsy. Marching into the enemy lair."
Flutter. An executive with crow wings—Alecto—leaned in, breath hot on my face.
"I'll praise you just for not running."
I stepped back, bowed deeply to all.
"Pleased to join you. Audit Team. Jo from Happy World Penalty Execution, transferred to HQ Audit."
Audit Team. HQ's proud, storied department.
Heart of the Night Faction's lair.
Thin ice amid Thanatos' betrayal fallout.
My chosen battlefield.
Which made it ideal. I'd get swept away in the blood winds and fired easy.
"Kuhuhu, Jo. Ties to Melinoë, and plenty with me too. I'll dote on you special."
The terrifying Erinyes, Furies of wrath and vengeance. The brutal Alecto would 'dote' on me?
Sarcasm. Marked for doom.
"Newbie pisses off Alecto day one."
"Here we go again."
"Cocky punk irked me, but now... pity."
Pity? Music to my ears.
Alecto, goddess of wrath and retribution. She didn't know why Princess Melinoë's favorite mortal picked Audit over Safety Management.
Heard he was targeted by Prince Zagreus's direct department, but whatever.
Having Jo nearby meant endless views of Melinoë's expressions. Alecto loved watching the haughty princess crack.
Plus, Jo was key to producing E&S, her new idol obsession. Personal ties galore.
"Kuhuhu, Jo. Ties to Melinoë, and plenty with me too. I'll dote on you special."
Pure sincerity, not a speck of dust. A hot potato toy walking in? No letting go.
'Gotta keep him from other departments. Treat him real nice!'