Ha-dong Extermination #3
"Kee-hek, keh-hek."
The Ha-dong waddled along, leading the way. Up close, that shell of his was pure turtle—hell, if we pried it off and processed it, couldn't we craft some badass armor? The thought made it look mighty appetizing. This is the age of Monster Hunter. Gear from yokai scraps? Win-win. Nah, this is murim, so let's call it Yokai Watch.
"Hey! You sure this is the right way?!"
"Kee-eek! Yes! This way!"
"Guide us straight... unless you wanna die ugly."
"Kee-it!"
Terror-stricken, the Ha-dong let out a pitiful squeak and picked up the pace. After groping at my two girlfriends and spewing filthy talk just moments ago, one beating and he's like this? Disgusting piece of shit. And kidnapping women for vile deeds? These Ha-dong bastards are all dead meat.
"Geun-hyeop. You're angry?"
"These freaks kidnapped women and did unspeakable things. Plus, they hurled pervy crap at you two earlier... Just looking at 'em makes it hard to hold back the killing urge."
"Fine righteous fury. Such spirit—it's impressive. You'll surely become a prodigy of the orthodox sects."
"Damn right! With you as my master, Se-rin, it's a given!"
"Hehe, indeed. I'll raise you well, so follow closely."
"You bet!"
Learning martial arts from a master like Se-rin and not making progress? I'd have to cut my own dick off. No way.
"Hng, well. With your special constitution and pure heart, diligent training could make you famous."
"No need to tell me twice. Ha-young, when I make it big, I'll hook up Mosan Sect too."
"Kukuku, funny talk. You think Mosan Sect's a pushover?"
"Not at all, but picture me ruling the world."
"Sure sure. Do your best. I'll be watching."
Ha-young waved it off like nonsense, but my resolve was ironclad. Anyway, even mid-chat, we never dropped our guard. That ambush earlier, this bastard's escape attempt...
"Kee-ik, kee-ik."
The guy kept eyeing the nearby stream, clearly itching to dive in, but a solid punch each time kept him focused on guiding. We followed the path along the stream until we finally reached their lair.
"This the place?"
What is this, Caribbean Bay? Ha-dong splashed happily everywhere in the stream. And there—a cave they seemed to call home.
"That cave?"
"Kee-hik... Yes. Th-the boss is in there..."
"Where's the woman?"
"Inside the cave, geh-hek?!"
Standard policy: Dispose of guides once they're spent. Se-rin swung her sword cleanly, and the Ha-dong's head tumbled. Using and discarding an evil yokai? Par for the course—no biggie.
"Boss and woman inside, huh. Let's wipe 'em out quick."
Ha-young said.
"But Ha-young, can we even raid that cave? What if it turns into an underwater tunnel midway? We'd be screwed."
"Underwater? Nah. Ha-dong aren't full aquatics. They sleep in land caves."
"Oh yeah?"
Problem solved, then.
"Let's move. Follow me."
"I trust only you, Master."
"Yes. Trust only me."
We three crept toward the cave along the streambank, hiding as best we could. But this was Ha-dong turf from the start.
"Humans!"
"Humans!"
"Kee-hik!"
Spotted by the swimming ones. They swarmed toward us.
"Humans!"
"Women!"
"Pretty women!"
That damn "pretty women" bullshit again! And then—
—Pew!
Suddenly, they spat water jets at us like squirt guns. Dodgable, sure, but it felt like spit—pure rage fuel.
"Kyaaak! What the hell are you spitting?! Die!"
Furious Ha-young swung her stone staff, hurling fireballs. But—
—Splash!
Shockingly, the Ha-dong whipped up a water spray, nullifying them!
"Kee-kee-kik!"
"Fire no scary!"
"Female tricks! Kee-kee-ik!"
"Show hole! Wanna see hole! Spread hole!"
"Kee-hik! Stick hand in female hole!"
These fuckers were mocking us! Water yokai perks in the drink, huh? Blocking fireballs that shredded bandits like paper.
"Better retreat for now. Tough fighting in the water."
"Yeah! Ha-young, drop the spells—fall back!"
"Eit! All die!"
I scooped up the rampaging Ha-young with her staff and bolted. Right then—
Kee-ik kee-ik!
Ha-dong stretched rubbery arms at us.
—Zwoop!
No contest. Splash! Se-rin slashed, severing the elongated arm clean. The shooter wailed like orphaned, thrashing the water.
"Kwaaaang!"
"Look at that crybaby. Nice cut, Se-rin."
"Nothing special."
We fell back some more.
"Daring to block my spells? I'll burn 'em all!"
"Gotta lure 'em onto land first."
What to do? Diving in was suicide. Ha-young's a top Taoist, Se-rin's Peak realm, but no gills. Fire attacks neutered underwater too.
"Se-rin, any bright ideas?"
"Even for a Peak expert like me, water yokai are tricky. Lure 'em out, obviously—but they won't chase far."
Made sense to me.
"Cave's their home... Could arson close-up, but can't with the woman inside."
"Exactly."
"Fire'd endanger her. Frontal assault it is."
No choice but the cave, then.
"Just provoke any land stragglers. Bound to draw some out—keep killing, maybe boss shows."
Ha-young shrugged it off, but I disagreed.
"They'll catch on eventually. Pretend lure?"
"Hm, true?"
"Think so. Head to the cave per Se-rin, gauge boss reaction, adapt. If lure works, great. If territorial, improvise."
Ha-young nodded.
"Fine, whatever."
"Smart plan, Geun-hyeop. Well-reasoned."
"Right?"
"No wonder your silver tongue."
"Heh heh, aw shucks."
Praise from my master? Felt good, kinda embarrassing. We pressed on per my plan. But Ha-dong knew humans were here—swarms gathered as we skirted toward the cave.
"Too many. Winnable?"
"No worries. Low-grade yokai, no formations. Lure to land, even encircled no problem."
"Peak expert...!"
Encirclement'd doom me, but Se-rin was chill.
"Kuku, always amazed. You're a scrub anyway."
"Hey! Scrub?!"
"You are. But land-lured, my spells wipe 'em. Impressed?"
"Speechless at your skill."
"Fine. You've got talent—catch up soon."
"Thanks!"
Master said it—believe and grind. My yokai core power-up's unique; develop it, realms await. Reaching the cave—
Splash!
Something burst from the cave, diving into the stream. Then—
Sploosh!
Two rose, upper bodies exposed.
"Whoa, they're huge!"
Two massive Ha-dong! Others were Ha-young-sized; these were leagues bigger. One dwarfed me.
"That's the boss!"
The other matched my height—vice-boss, probably. Greeting us personally?
Plan was lure out cave-dwellers, but they came out. Advantage us.
"Kee-eek! These the humans?!"
"Kee-hee-hit! Yes, Boss!"
"Look look! Two pretty women!"
Minions fawned like sycophants.
"Kee-ik...! Real pretty women!"
"Kee-ee-eek! Two new holes! No, six!"
Fucking hell. Yokai brains all pussy?
"Haa. Still vile as ever."
"Sick of it. Burn 'em all."
Se-rin and Ha-young sighed, killing intent rising. Me? Fury boiled at their leering.
"Kill 'em all. Lure first."
"Got it. How?"
"Improv."
Right on cue—
Splash!
Boss swam at us.
"Kee-eek! Stay put! I'm coming!"
"Be good new brides!"
Leaders charged, minions trailed.
"What the—"
They lured themselves? Blinded by Se-rin and Ha-young's beauty!
"What braindead fucks! Lure done—fall back!"
"So stupid... yokai, figures."
"Idiots!"
We bolted back, glancing—they pursued, eyes mad. Squelch squelch! Wet feet pounding land.
"Kee-ee-eek! Castrate man, capture women!"
"New hole brides! Kee-it!"
"Mate! Mate! Kee-hee-hik!"
"Kee-ik kee-ik! Wanna mate!"
Horny maniacs! Far enough from water now...
"...!"
Eye contact—we halted together.
"Geun-hyeop! Ready! I take biggest boss! You—"
"Got it! Vice-boss mine!"
Se-rin on boss, me on vice.
"Perfect! Leave trash mobs to me!"
Ha-young mops up small fry. No planning needed—they handed us the battlefield. Time for a bloody feast!
Goooong.
Already channeling Cheong-han Sim-gong mid-run. Focus sharpened vision, etching the scene in my brain. And—
Whoosh!
Fireballs rained into the pack.
BOOM!
BOOM-BOOOM!
Chain blasts, flames roaring. Clustered rushers engulfed instantly.
"Kee-ee-ee-eek!"
"Kee-iit!"
Horrid screams. Sudden inferno scattered the mating maniacs.
"Kee-ik! F-fire!"
"Fire!"
Big shots held ground, but panic meant stream-bound soon. Trapped underwater? Screwed. So I—
"You frog fuckers!"
Charged forward, taunting.
"Not frog—turtle! Can't tell, yet bark at us?! Die all!"
"Kee, kee-ee-eek?! No frog no turtle!"
Worked!
Sploosh!
Boss and vice shot arms at me. Fast mid-range, but I dodged—stepped light, twisted torso, evaded crossing limbs. Simultaneously—
"Haaap!"
Se-rin roared, lunging at boss—sword aura blazing. Boss retracted in panic; I—
"RAAAAAARGH!"
Roared, charging vice-boss. I've got pride—if I can't take this fucker solo, cut my dick off!