Accept This Newbie
"Where's something fun to read?"
Bored and idle. My life was so free it had curdled into boredom. I needed dopamine. So today, like always, I set off in search of pleasure.
"Another earthquake?"
It was a radio handed out by the government one day. No idea why they distributed them, but they were free. No reason not to take one. I'd been planning to sell it on Carrot Market, but it turned out to spout more entertaining news than expected. That's why cab drivers always have it on, huh?
Beep.
"Now even overseas is going nuts."
Lately, disaster reports had been piling up. Every time, the government preached to trust the nation and carry on with daily life. But rumors whispered that they handed out radios to issue mass evacuation orders all at once. Prices were skyrocketing as a result. No wonder I was rolling around at home. Was this some strategy to minimize spending?
Beep.
Beep.
Finally, some proper news. Flip through any channel and it's all disasters, disasters, disasters. At first, it was scary and terrifying, but now it was just tiresome, downright exhausting.
"Is the world really ending?"
But everyday life chugged along just fine otherwise. Little guys like me just scraped by day to day, burning through life. What was the point of worrying? Time to hit the galleries.
"Oh, right. Before that."
Before gallery-hopping, there was a ritual I had to perform: lighting a candle.
Fwoosh. I flicked the lighter from the convenience store and lit the candle. The flickering flame soothed my mind. No clue why, but ever since I was a kid, fire had this calming effect. Oh, and for the record, I don't smoke.
Click. With the solemn rite complete, I possessed the spirit of the community troll. Some busybody might scoff at wasting time like this. But in a world where prices were insane, doomsday rage-quitters were everywhere, nothing beat gallery trolling for safety and cost-performance.
Fuck. A thug beats someone up and gets a "diminished capacity due to disaster stress" ruling? Now I'm too scared to even go outside. So as a total NEET, this was my job: beautifully wasting time.
Click. Idly surfing the net, I slipped into a familiar gallery.
Click.
Climber Gallery. Aka ClimberGal. My dopamine pit stop. Holy land of shitposts. No idea what balls the OP had to mention Yeomhwa, though. Not my problem.
[How to boost awakening odds]
[STRAT: tips for floors 1-10]
[Buying mana stones. Bulk deals welcome. 000-0000-0000.]
[LFG Tower climb party. Must bring registration. Healers, tanks welcome.]
[Analysis: Impact of 74th floor climb on national politics.]
Click.
Lots of comments, so I figured it was substantial. Nope, classic bait. "Peaceful as ever today."
Fresh-off-the-press news twisted with pure agenda for max agro. Gallery life in a nutshell.
"Wonder what awakening feels like. Probably fucking awesome?"
Awakeners could climb the Tower. They say the views are otherworldly. Dangerous, sure, but the cash... and the fame rivals idols.
"Awakeners are walking totems, huh."
Like the Yeomhwa from that first post. Pretty face plus flashy flames equals thick fanbase. Personality? No clue, never met her. Not like a basement-dweller like me would.
Scroll scroll. Hunting fresh dopamine, I scrolled down. I'd clicked most posts, so titles felt familiar. Weekday, everyone busy with work, I guess. Debating ditching for another gallery when...
"What's this? Xianxia Gallery?"
Like a mutt snapping at feed, I clicked the intriguing title.
Xianxia? Like Chinese wuxia? Power balance on another level, cultivator world. Why's it popping up here?
"Lemme see. Xianxia, Xianxia... there."
Bored me hunted down the gallery and clicked.
And...
You have entered the Xianxia Gallery.
"What? I got in. No qualification limits?"
Gallery vet here, never worn a mod badge. Heavenly Seedling? What's that? Possessed, I rummaged through.
"Game gallery?"
Like some Ragnarok with time limits? New terms and vibe threw me off. But I had my all-purpose encyclopedia: the internet. Quick search for "Heavenly Human Qi."
<Heavenly Human Qi. Term from xianxia worlds: Realm where cultivators manifest their inner world and contain life/death/transience within primal essence>
Uh... no idea. It's Korean, but feels alien. Head-scratching, back to the gallery.
"Cosplay gallery?"
World with awakeners and Towers. Even field mobs now. Riding that wave, self-proclaimed martial artists popped up, mostly scam academies. Whole scandal rocked Korea for a bit. Probably same with this Xianxia Gallery. Bummer.
"Hence the entry restrictions."
Block outsiders to hide the grift. So why me? No clue. Talk of 50 years left, Dao Hearts, pretty committed to the bit. But that wasn't important.
"Ugh, can't get used to it."
Hopped tons of communities, but this wholesome vibe? First time. And even for hardcore cosplay, boomer posting...
Some malicious vibes, but rare. This wasn't a gallery. Galleries are for chaos. I brainlessly fired off a post.
That tough? Was a breeze for me.
Counted to three mentally, refreshed.
Gallery aflame. Now it felt normal. Proper gallery chaos.
This. Toss one log, whole bonfire. But reactions hotter than expected. Dowon that big a deal? Set my ID to generic 'Anon' anyway. Wait for it. I might suck at most things, but agro? Pro level. Gonna make it explode.
"Huh? Why's it like this?"
Adding more fuel, but chat froze. Mashing enter revealed why.
Comments disabled by administrator.
"Mod hammer already?"
IP swarm got me banned quick. Was fun while it lasted. Shame.
Big names showed up too. Shoulda piled on. Regret.
Then, the ban culprit appeared.
Okhwa. Mod-like name. But my little spark too fierce? Big names griped at mod.
Things got juicy.
Mod getting flak from names. Authority weaker than expected. Quick ban showed decisiveness and power, though. Weird. Inside story? Gallery rules?
"Heart demons? Guess I clutched pearls hard."
No xianxia expert, but heart demons? Some triggered af, venting to mod. Hence my lightspeed ban. Got it. Then, genius idea flashed.
Tap tap.
Yes! Halfway there. Now my silver tongue.
Gallery ghost trait: trivia hoarder, sophistry master.
Chat ban lifted.
Yes! Justice served. Tongue-lashing the mod to victory, dopamine surged.
Ahh, this is why I can't quit galleries. Dopamine filling up.
Comments firing again.
"Mortal what now."
Term soup. Searched: ordinary human. Fair. Total NEET here. Big shock?
All curious about me. Answered easy.