How Do You Eat It?

The first regular council of the Gehenna Great Forest demi-humans.

For the first time, the demi-humans had truly gathered because of Behemoth, who had appeared in the Great Forest.

Elves.

Orcs.

Goblins.

Dwarves.

Lizardmen.

Not every demi-human in the Great Forest had come, of course. Even so, the fact that five races had assembled at all bordered on a miracle, considering their ancestors had taught them to keep their distance from the others.

"Then I’ll get straight to the point, okay?"

In the meeting hall where each race had sent a representative, the girl with the long, swaying tail pushed up her glasses and spoke.

The lizardmen had done the most to make this meeting happen, so it was only natural that their representative, Lizardrin, would serve as chair.

"The reason we can all gather here like this is because of the mysterious monster, okay?"

Her solemn manner and voice clashed hilariously with that cute little ending, and the other races struggled not to laugh before breaking into awkward coughs instead.

Lizardrin’s expression soured for a moment, but she kept going.

"We’re simply too different from one another, okay? We’re like water and oil that can never mix. The lizardmen were taught that by our ancestors, so we know it well. But this situation was an emergency, so I hurriedly gathered all of you here."

The reason the lizardmen had taken the lead in assembling the demi-humans was the story of Behemoth recorded on the prophecy tablet.

"Our lizardman ancestors came from outer space, okay? And they settled on this land with something called a prophecy tablet, okay?"

The representative of the orcs, Ogril, raised his hand.

He had arrived at the hall wearing nothing but a single pair of underpants and carrying his enormous axe on his back. The only ones who seemed to respect that sight were the goblins, who shared the same green skin.

The other representatives, Lizardrin included, looked at him with visible distaste, but he paid it no mind and raised his hand proudly anyway.

"Speak."

"If you make it too long, I won’t understand it."

"I’ll explain it as simply as I can…."

Lizardrin began what was, in essence, an educational lecture tailored to Ogril’s level.

"Our lizardmen have an amazing stone tablet that records things that will happen in the future. And on that amazing tablet, there’s also a record of the end of this world. The end of this world will come about because of the gods, and we’ll all be slaughtered by the beast of calamity that the gods created. Do you understand so far? If not, please raise your hand."

Ogril raised his hand.

What a fucking moron.

Lizardrin forced a businesslike smile.

"A super-strong monster will destroy the world."

"Is that really true? How do you know that?"

"My grandfather told me."

"I see…."

Ogril accepted that without another word.

"The prophecy tablet contains records about Behemoth. A tail that stretches out like a giant serpent, legs as thick as the tallest, greatest tower, a body covered in scales hard as black steel. One of the beast calamities created by the gods."

"……."

‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠

"We lizardmen are certain that the unidentified monster that appeared in the Gehenna Great Forest is Behemoth."

The dwarf representative, Drower, raised his hand.

"Speak."

"He wasn’t that big, though?"

"He’s hiding his true form. Behemoth only grows huge under the full moon."

"Hmm. Is that so…."

Drower folded his arms.

Having seen Behemoth with his own eyes, he thought Lizardrin was exaggerating.

Could a creature no larger than an enormous tree really grow that massive?

"Are you finished?"

"Yes."

Lizardrin continued.

"The prophecy tablet does not lie. Behemoth is a beast of calamity. From now on, we need to prepare for the end of the world. It would be ideal to tell the strongest humans about this, but humans never listen to demi-humans, do they? I think we should at least join forces among ourselves. The best course of action would be—"

Before Lizardrin could even finish, the demi-humans shot their hands into the air.

Judging by their expressions, none of them seemed to believe a word she’d said.

Lizardrin had expected that much.

Compared to the cool-headed, wise cold-blooded races, the warm-blooded ones had hot heads and empty skulls.

It would take a long time to convince them.

This meeting was only the first step.

"Let the goblin representative speak first, okay?"

The goblin representative, Gobuji, took the floor and opened his mouth.

"There’s no credibility to it."

"I already told you about the prophecy tablet, okay? It’s a tablet that records things that will happen in the future."

Lizardrin let out a sigh.

She had braced herself for this, but irritation still welled up inside her.

However carefully she explained things from start to finish, they still wouldn’t get it, and that made it hard not to get angry.

Even so, Lizardrin kept her tone gentle and respectful.

"The prophecy tablet was brought by our ancestors five hundred and thirty-two years ago, from the planet…."

"Does it say what I’ll have for breakfast tomorrow morning?"

"…What?"

"Does it?"

‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠

What the hell is this idiot talking about now?

Lizardrin sat there with her mouth half-open, too stunned to speak.

It was so ridiculous that her words simply refused to come out.

"If it does, and you can guess it, then I’ll believe you."

"Why would something that trivial be written down in the first place…."

"Then I can’t believe it."

Gobuji looked at Lizardrin, who had suddenly started spouting nonsense about prophecy tablets, with open contempt.

If she wanted to persuade them properly, she should bring evidence instead of demanding that they believe her because "it’s written on a tablet."

Gobuji snorted.

"How can you claim to know the future when you can’t even see what’s right in front of you?"

Lizardrin burned with anger.

How dare a warm-blooded runt mock their sacred tablet?

"We do know the future, of course. Isn’t that obvious? When goblins were being devoured while struggling against monsters in the Great Forest, we lizardmen didn’t suffer a single casualty, did we? And when goblins were driven out of human territory, we predicted it and moved into the Great Forest without any losses. And you still don’t believe me?"

Gobuji calmly held up his middle finger.

"Your mother, human."

"Hey, you little bastard!"

Lizardrin shot to her feet.

Gobuji did the same.

Both of them drew their weapons and glared at each other.

Drower only laughed uproariously, while Ogril tightened his grip on his axe.

"If you hit someone with green skin, you’re getting hit back just as hard."

"Get lost, you stone-headed bastard!"

"My head is stone-hard, all right. Thanks for the compliment."

"That wasn’t a compliment!"

Just as the room had grown ugly enough that Lizardrin looked ready to strike first, the sound of an elf song drifted softly through the hall.

"Hold hands with your family, and let’s go ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠together. Novel Mart. So happy. Novel Mart, happy happy happy, Novel Mart, Novel Ma↗rt~☆"

Nillia and Nillius.

They sang the beautiful melody they had heard from Behemoth.

And then—

"Hmph."

Gobuji slid his sword back into his belt and sat down, and Lizardrin sat down as well.

Once the situation had calmed, Drower leaned forward with interest.

"A mysterious song with linguistic structure, is it? Is it ancient speech?"

The elf siblings who had been sent as representatives only smiled.

Nillius bowed his head to Lizardrin.

"I apologize for singing without being given the floor."

In fact, the one who owed an apology was Lizardrin.

She thanked the elves for settling the matter.

"No, I’m the one who should thank you. I’m the one who’s sorry for making such a scene."

"May I continue?"

"Go ahead."

Nillius understood why Gobuji had reacted so sharply.

He also understood how deeply the lizardmen valued the prophecy tablet.

Unlike the short-lived races, they were long-lived folk who had outlasted the centuries.

Their quarrel did not come from right and wrong, but from difference.

Nillius smiled with patience and warmth.

"I have something to say to you, Chairwoman Lizardrin."

"What is it?"

"Our elves have received enormous help from the one you call Behemoth. And I’m certain we are not the only demi-humans who have been helped."

Nillius looked at Gobuji, who nodded in agreement.

"Our elves suffered for a very long time at the hands of the Demon Tree. We lost many of our kin and suffered much grief because of it. But there was nothing we could do on our own. The Demon Tree was, quite simply, our natural enemy. Nillia."

Nillius looked at Nillia.

Tell them about the sight you saw.

Nillia earnestly told the demi-humans about the scene she had witnessed.

Drower and Gobuji grew interested, while Ogril still seemed to have no thoughts at all.

"Behemoth helped us elves. And we weren’t the only ones."

Gobuji leaped to his feet.

In a voice full of excitement, he declared proudly, "That’s right! We goblins were helped by Behemoth too! He hunted down the Man-Eater that was slaughtering our kin. He took the blood vengeance we should have carried out ourselves. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠He acted for us without asking for a single thing in return!"

"Our dwarves got help too. I don’t know whether he meant to or not, but he beat a Cyclops to death with his bare hands. Thanks to that, we were able to mine gold in the golden mine."

"Chairwoman. If Behemoth is a beast of calamity, then why did he help us?"

Lizardrin fumbled over her words.

Unlike when Lizardrin had spoken, Nillius’s words drew a great deal of support.

In both Nillius’s and Nillia’s eyes, a faith so deep it verged on madness shone unmistakably.

"Th-that’s…."

"Of course, according to the prophecy tablet, he may still be a beast of calamity. But my people and I think differently."

Nillius slammed his fist onto the table.

"He descended to this land for the sake of the demi-humans. That is a fact."

"I agree."

"If the goblin says so, then I agree too."

Drower shrugged.

"I’ll remain silent for now."

Lizardrin frowned.

At the very least, it seemed the elves would not be persuadable in this meeting.

How did he win them over so completely?

Lizardrin was astonished.

The elves might look kind and gentle on the outside, but in truth they were a proud, lofty race.

How had he managed to make them worship anything other than nature?

Does the beast of calamity not only possess power, but also a cunning tongue…?

That thought only made Lizardrin more wary of Behemoth.

I stared at the monster corpse I had brought back to the cave and folded my arms. How the hell am I supposed to cook this…