Playing Detective with the Hardboiled Girl Maid
……It was a real pain digging up the headquarters office address for ViseCamO. I scoured the internet on Han Min-seo's phone and combed through the furious rants of the victims' comments.
Finally, I rushed straight to the scammers' lair.
But the dingy office building was already deserted, like they'd hightailed it in the dead of night. A4 papers were scattered everywhere on the floor, tangled LAN cables yanked out and dumped in the corner. The safe door hung open, completely empty.
Hmm. I really underestimated humans.
Of course a bunch of con artists wouldn't stick around their office like honest folk.
[We won't get Jenica's money back!]
Yeah, tell me about it. What now?
I was smacking my lips in disappointment over the wild goose chase when—
BAM! The door at the back ripped off its hinges and flew open.
"You scamming bastards, come out and face me—"
Through the puff of white dust came a frilly maid dress first. Cyan hair and eyes—an android maid, but formerly a hardboiled mercenary dude. Sia.
"—Huh?"
Our eyes met, her expression a little dazed. But I was just as surprised by the encounter.
[She's cute now but still talks rough!]
[Must be here to beat up the scammers!]
Amid the little minds' excited chatter in my mental world, I stared blankly at Sia.
She'd settled in nicely as the agency's cleaning contractor, courtesy of Shin Chang-seok. So why was she here in the middle of a weekday afternoon?
Whether she read my gaze or not, Sia furrowed her brow and groaned.
"Fuck. Those scamming shits already packed up and bolted."
She scanned the office, her maid skirt swishing, then turned back to me.
"But what the hell's a little miss like you doing here? Don't tell me you bought into that ViseCamO stock bullshit… nah, no way."
Sia shook her head, muttering to herself.
Yeah, exactly. Makes no sense. I don't even have ID—how could I open a brokerage account?
"Ahem. Well, I dunno the details, but…"
Sia rubbed her chin thoughtfully for a moment, then suddenly cleared her throat like a lightbulb had gone off.
"L-Lookin' at it, seems like you're chasin' these scumbags too… right?"
Spot on. I nodded vigorously.
Sia grinned like she'd hit the jackpot.
"Oh! Nailed it. So, wanna team up?"
Team up? Out of nowhere?
"Got a job from the victims' group, y'see. Bring back the scammers' heads. Or recover the cash for 'em. Either works. Though con artists don't cough up dough even when they're dead, so heads it is."
Huh?
Wasn't Sia supposed to be cleaning up society's trash? Guess that meant rotten scum like this, not just literal filth.
Makes sense. Wouldn't put it past her.
The girl maid android body I customized for her with Lee Se-hee's funding lets her move at super speed—like time stops around her—and shred enemies. A pint-sized maid of mass destruction.
Way stronger than her old hardboiled merc body, by several magnitudes.
Perfect opportunity for me. Let the ex-merc handle the tedious tracking and hunting. I just cash in on the scammers she finds and hand the money back to Jenica.
Flawless partnership.
I extended my hand.
"Wh—?! Didn't think you'd actually go for it, little miss. Sweet! Temporary alliance formed."
Her small, soft hand gripped mine. The maid android's touch was perfectly replicated—warmth, texture, indistinguishable from a human's.
I'd been stuck without proper human interaction on my own, but this worked out great. Things just got a lot easier.
Hehehe.
From there, Sia's clue-hunting kicked off.
She tore through every corner of the abandoned office. Up-ending trash cans to flatten crumpled receipts one by one, piecing together shredded document scraps like a puzzle on the floor, even digging through potted plant soil.
She's really into it.
Me? I trailed behind her like a puppy, just watching.
[Does that kinda thing exist in real life?]
[Let's deduce while we sleep, like that super famous detective!]
[We don't sleep!]
[Eek!]
The little minds chattered away, munching snacks in my mental world.
Hmm, but it's not like the comics—no instant culprit reveal from a few clues.
Maybe 'cause she's an ex-merc, not a detective.
Sia seemed to feel it too. After an hour of searching, she sighed and stood.
"Ugh, nothin'. Figures—this ain't my wheelhouse."
She dusted off her maid skirt and turned to me.
"No dice here, little miss. Let's hit the back alleys. Gotta ask around for this shit."
And so the scene shifted from the scammers' office to the alleys.
Sia's questioning was—entertaining as hell.
Slipping a ten-thousand-won bill to a guy smoking by a utility pole for info, or prying useful tidbits from old dudes cracking beers under a convenience store parasol.
"Oh, ViseCamO? Everyone in the know knew. They had some real pull."
"That's why they lasted. Sucked every last penny from the small fry."
Oho. These folks know more than I thought.
Maybe 'cause she's an android in a maid outfit. Or that ex-merc charisma. People dropped their guards around her like crazy.
The bespectacled mind muttered.
After hustling through three or four alleys tailing Sia's busy ass,
a greasy-fringed guy with slumped shoulders and grimy nails slunk up in a filthy alley corner.
"Little missies—"
He squatted in front of me and Sia.
"Wanna ice cream from uncle? There's a killer fermented tofu flavor over there. Super tasty."
Fermented tofu? First I've heard of that flavor.
Earth's dessert world is endlessly inventive.
[Chinese snack! Fermented tofu thingy.]
[Wonder what it tastes like?]
The little minds couldn't contain their curiosity, tugging my skirt hem in my mental world.
Me too, honestly. Never tried it.
Can't pass this up. I nodded, about to follow—
"You fuckin' pedo!"
Thwack. A dull thud, and the guy's body spun twice in the air before slamming into the utility pole.
Sia's right leg was stretched straight into the space he'd occupied a second ago. Her frilly skirt fluttered back into place.
Sia bared her teeth in a growl.
"If you're buyin' for a kid, get somethin' proper! Vanilla or chocolate—not fuckin' fermented tofu!"
Damn. My fermented tofu ice cream just flew off into the ether.
Gazing wistfully at the crumpled guy, I felt Sia plant hands on hips, eyes narrowing.
"Little miss. Don't follow strangers. World's full of scum."
True. But I'm already tagging along with a super rough hardboiled girl maid.
Doesn't land with much conviction.
Despite the minor commotions, days of legwork paid off. Sia pieced together recovered data from a burner phone and alley intel into a solid lead.
"Tch."
She chugged her mix coffee from a paper cup, crumpled it, and dunked it in the trash.
"……Mirae Group's involved."
The name slipped from her lips. Mirae Group—rival to Oseong, the megacorp supplying the latest Heracles combat humanoids.
"Sigh. Never miss a chance to suck blood, do they."
After stewing in irritation, Sia's next plan was dead simple: Infiltrate Mirae Group HQ for more clues.
"Mirae family's on another level from Cheolung chumps. Dozens of direct heirs at HQ alone, hundreds with branches. Can't tell who's guilty from outside."
Got it. Infiltration it is—how?
Catching my curious look, Sia grinned.
"Don't sweat it. No frontal assault like with Cheolung. We'll use our heads this time."
She pointed at her maid outfit.
"Infiltration gear's already on, right? We'll pose as cleaning android maids."
Aha. I nodded in understanding.
A few little minds were already sparkling, begging for maid outfit swaps.
Okay, okay. Got it.
I shed my dress, molding a white apron, black skirt, and lace headband.
Poof.
"……Huh."
Sia stared, momentarily speechless, scanning me up and down.
Guess my outfit change looked pretty weird.
"Whatever. Let's go, little maid miss."
She's a little maid too—does that make us comrades?
Corporate HQ cleaning usually happens at dawn when it's dead quiet.
We strolled into the underground employee entrance like we owned the place.
At the security gate, Sia swiped a card she'd scored somewhere—beep—and it swung open.
I trotted after her.
Hmm, security's surprisingly lax. Or maybe big buildings like this are blind to cleaning androids.
They're background noise. There or not, nobody cares.
Whoosh—door shut, elevator ascended.
Target: Executive floors.
Sia twirled a duster as the numbers climbed.
"Riflin' a few exec offices should turn up clues. Big stock scam like this leaves paper trails."
Ding. Doors opened.
Sia tried the nearest exec office door. Locked, but her tool from her pocket picked it in seconds.
"Little miss, start here."
Sia began searching: desk drawers, file cabinets, laptop.
I idly admired the exec wing scenery.
But man.
Tons of maid comrades cleaning this floor. Across the hall, by the stairs, other offices.
Whoa, more just piled out of the elevator.
Big corp must run a hefty cleaning crew. And they're all super serious-looking.
Impressed by their professionalism, I swung my duster at a display case, pretending to dust.
Swish, swish.
Meanwhile, Sia seemed to hit paydirt—camera shutter sounds nonstop.
Click, click.
That instant.
The maids at both ends of the hall moved in unison. Silently, all at once.
Like a roundup hunt.
——Or so I thought. Turns out it was literal.
Just with me and Sia as the prey.
In a blink, over twenty maids surrounded us.
"……Tch."
Sia finally looked up from her phone, clicking her tongue.
The lead maid at the front of the encirclement bowed gracefully. Her skirt hem traced a perfect circle.
"Uninvited guests. The young lady requests an audience."
Hmm. This twist was not on the bingo card.