The First Existential Crisis
………… The echo of gunfire reverberated between the trash heaps.
Human and android. The bodies of the two lovers tumbled into the garbage pile. Dust billowed up, metal shards scattering with dull clinks.
The maid android had a massive hole blasted through her head. The large-caliber round had shredded her internal frame and wiring bundles to pieces. Instant death.
Immediately after, shadows rose in unison from behind a container. Men who had cleverly concealed themselves behind container boxes and piles of discarded electronics. More than ten gunmen slowly converged on the trash heap.
"It's real, alright."
The leader pulled back the bolt on his large-caliber sniper rifle, ejecting the spent casing. The hot brass rolled across the ground with a sharp clang.
"Who'd have thought he'd actually crawl into a death trap to save his lover, his own maid android."
"Come on, we've been around this game long enough. An ambush in a dump? Obvious as hell."
The gunman beside him smirked crookedly.
"Whatever. They say he's an android lover. Guess he loves her enough to risk his life for it."
Snickers spread among the mercenaries. One of them approached the fallen Cheon Jung-sa on the trash heap and hesitated slightly.
"Hold up, this guy's blood looks kinda purple?"
Sure enough, the blood pooling from Cheon Jung-sa's chest had a faint purple hue.
"Ugh, what the hell kind of drugs is this freak on?"
"Beats me. Microgenics stuff? It's flooding the black market these days."
"Whatever. Just finish him off."
The sniper's combat boot kicked the maid android's side. Metal and silicone thudded together, her body rolling away from Cheon Jung-sa.
The moment he shoved the android's corpse aside with his foot, the sniper's eyes narrowed briefly.
The android's position. Face down, chest to the ground, draped protectively over Cheon Jung-sa's upper body. In that split second the bullet flew, the machine had reflexively thrown itself to shield its master. Pointless against a large-caliber sniper rifle, but still.
"...A machine in love. What a ridiculous world."
The sniper chuckled dryly.
Bang. Dead center in the chest. A precise shot. Cheon Jung-sa's body jerked once violently, then went still. The mercenaries watched the thick blood spread across the ground before finally slinging their rifles over their shoulders and turning away.
Job done. All that was left was collecting fat paychecks from the chaebol bosses and hitting the booze.
"Ah, fuck. If only we'd just killed the target. That android maid bitch—if she'd lived, I'd have fucked her once."
"You psycho. You an android lover like that guy?"
"Hey, Oseong's Android Housewife originals have all human-like internals. They're made for companionship from the start, right?"
"How the hell would you know?"
Vulgar jokes flew as tension fully dissolved.
Then, from the chest of the rearmost mercenary walking away, a gleaming blue blade suddenly protruded.
"Wha...?"
The vibrating knife had pierced through his back, ruptured his heart, and burst out through his ribcage. Staring dumbly at his own chest, the mercenary mumbled stupidly. Amid his flashing red vision, he instinctively groped his thigh. The vibrating knife that should always be sheathed there was gone without a trace.
He coughed up bloody foam and collapsed face-first with a heavy thud, like a metal weight hitting the ground. The mercenaries ahead whirled around at the sound.
One, two, three. Smiles vanished from every face that turned.
Behind the fallen comrade stood a man. The man who should be dead. Beyond the gaping hole in his chest, a bizarre yet mesmerizing purple light flickered.
"One down."
Cheon Jung-sa bared his fangs in a grin, flicking blood from the vibrating knife into the air. Red droplets scattered from the cold blade to the ground, freezing the dump's air with killing intent.
…………
Cheon Jung-sa, impressive. He charged in with just a single vibrating knife and butchered those armed mercenaries like twisting a kid's wrist.
That aside.
Cheon Jung-sa's girl... she was an android maid. Who'd have guessed? I never even imagined it.
The gangsters in that hideout calling him an android lover. Him shelling out big bucks for a 10-year subscription at Oseong's Android Store. Rushing straight to the dump, ignoring everything else.
All the clues lined up perfectly.
Oh dear. Detective Outer God's deduction failed hard this time.
"Truth is, everyone but you already knew... sigh."
No way. Those little thought kids who bounce around hunting snacks every day couldn't possibly out-deduce me. Right, kids?
No sooner had I said it than the little thoughts all shot up their hands in a swarm.
Wait, really? I'm the last one to catch on?
...Lies. No way. Those smarty-pants thoughts must've teamed up with the kids just to tease me.
Shifting my gaze back to reality, Cheon Jung-sa was walking toward the trash heap. He stopped before the shattered remains of the android with her head blown open—Siel. He stared down at her for a long moment, then dropped to his knees and pulled her body into his arms.
Cheon Jung-sa's fingers brushed back the hair of the android maid cradled in his embrace. Peering into eyes that no longer reacted to light—their light sensors fried—his lips trembled.
A storm of emotion raged from deep within Cheon Jung-sa.
Ugh. Every drop of moisture in my mouth evaporates. That scorching sensation from the house ruins earlier is back, filling my mouth again. But this time, it's on another level. My tongue's cracking dry. The salty undercurrent of rage intensifies. The faint aftertaste of sadness from before now surges up, mingling with the fury.
This attachment human's trying to crush his sadness with anger. But it doesn't seem to be working.
"Ugh... ugh..."
A few little thoughts clamped their mouths and slumped over. Too heavy for kids still.
So this is the emotion of a man who's lost his beloved right before his eyes.
I silently watched Cheon Jung-sa's back from behind the trash heap.
But you know.
That Siel android maid. In the instant the bullet flew, she shoved Cheon Jung-sa aside and put herself in its path. If she hadn't pushed him, it would've hit his chest instead of his head—and an android could've survived chest damage. She sacrificed her own chance to live for her master.
And thanks to that sacrifice, Cheon Jung-sa survived without his head blown off.
Was her action true love for Cheon Jung-sa? Or just a reflexive response to her top-priority AI directive: protect the master?
Can AI even feel love to begin with?
"It's possible."
The glasses thought replied in a serious tone.
"Human love is ultimately just protein circuits dominated by biochemical signals like hormones."
The glasses thought sketched two diagrams on the chalkboard. Left: a human brain with neurons and synapses connected. Right: an electronic circuit with transistors and wiring.
"Electrical signals flowing through an android's silicon circuits aren't fundamentally different. Just carbon-based vs. silicon-based."
The glasses thought's chalk scrawled an equals sign between the two diagrams on the board.
"No matter the circuit, if the output is 'protected the other by destroying itself,' that's equal value."
Makes sense when you put it that way. Regardless of the computation process, the act of trying to protect someone at the cost of self-destruction isn't fake.
Just like how I acknowledged Will Bates's emotionless will as real.
If the result is the same, you can't devalue it just because the process differs.
Then, one of the little thoughts in the mental world stepped forward cautiously.
"Th-then... what about us?"
Hm? Looking back, this one's expression felt unfamiliar. The usual little thoughts are harmless rascals—squabbling over favorite snacks, building broccoli altars, or playing ring-around-the-rosy with their buddies.
This one has a different glint in its eyes. If anything, it resembles the doctor-gowned or glasses types—cut from the intellectual cloth.
"Our origins differ from other intelligences in this universe. We're just fragments severed from Mom's nerves, right?"
The little thought's voice quivered slightly.
"Can the emotions felt by mere terminal nerves like us hold the same value as those of humans or androids?"
Uh, that's—
"Are we... just mimicking the emotions of nearby intelligences like humans?"
The question dropped, and the air in the mental world shifted. Unease rippled through the gathered little thoughts like waves.
Murmur, murmur.
Questions birthed questions, doubts fed on doubts, growing larger.
Suddenly, one huddled at the edge lifted its head. Whoa, pupils fully dilated.
"In the end, we have to grow like Mom—devour all planets and organisms until we consume the universe...!"
That instant. Its face twisted. The cute girl's features melted away, revealing something else beneath. Countless tentacles, teeth, eyeballs. My original physical form—the shape of madness.
Not just one. The one beside it, then the next. Infection spread one by one, transforming into the shape of madness.
Oh no. Sudden existential anxiety is morphing into body-reversion impulse.