Don't Leave Me, Sir Knight
Sleep would not come. The cold pre-dawn air slipped through the gap in the window and licked across my cheek, but the nameless anxiety smoldering in my chest refused to die.
Lying in bed and staring up at the ceiling, I felt the gleaming bed curtains bear down on me like the massive lid of a coffin.
I can't... breathe.
A sharp ache prickled around my heart. At the sensation of my fingertips going cold, I clutched the blanket tight.
I was afraid. Without even knowing what I was afraid of, a compulsion shook my soul without mercy—the need to see him, right now, this very instant.
"My lady, are you still awake? Shall I warm your medicinal tea and bring it up?"
The maid's voice from beyond the door pierced my eardrums with unusual sharpness. Normally I would have answered gently, but tonight I had no room for courtesy.
"...No. Just leave me alone."
"But my lady, your complexion is so poor..."
"I told you to get out!"
The shout tore out of me before I could stop it. I felt the maid flinch on the other side of the door, but I had no mind left for apologies.
I have to see him. Only when I see him can I breathe.
This was already a kind of survival instinct. Without Sir Aiden's dry, indifferent words, without those chilling eyes that seemed to see straight through me, I felt I would be sealed away all over again in that terrible darkness of the forest.
With only a cloak thrown over my shoulders, I slipped out of my room. The road to the annex basement, dodging the servants' eyes, was long and treacherous, and my heart pounded as though it would burst.
It'll be all right. Sir Knight is always there. Today, too, he'll correct my speech, pick apart my feelings, and drive me onward.
Clinging to that hope, I reached the entrance of the confinement cell—and froze where I stood.
"...Huh?"
A dumb moan leaked out between my lips. The knights who should have been guarding the underground corridor lay sprawled across the floor. And the iron bars of the cell, which should have been sealed fast, were bent like taffy by some inhuman strength.
The room was empty. On the old chair where he used to sit, only the cold light of dawn pooled.
Has he really gone?
My mind flashed white. A falling sensation, as if the ground beneath my feet had vanished whole, swept through my body.
Without a word. Without a single word to me—just like that?
It felt as if my heart had dropped through the soles of my feet. I tried to draw breath, but the air scattered into the void and never reached my lungs. My fingertips shook as if in convulsion.
Leaving me behind—going off all alone, truly?
Before betrayal could even arrive, fear crashed over me like a great tidal wave. A world without him was once more that hell reeking of blood and filled with the cries of beasts.
I bolted from the cell like a madwoman and ran for the surface. Not knowing where to go, I moved on instinct alone—chase the direction he had vanished.
Crossing the garden beaded with cold dew toward the outer wall, I spotted a familiar shadow beneath the trees. A massive frame, and the tattoo on his right arm gleaming cold in the moonlight.
"...Sir Knight."
My voice trembled, thin as a ghost's whisper. The shadow that had stood motionless slowly turned its head. It was Aiden. He stood at the base of the wall with his luggage in hand, looking down at me.
"Roselyne?"
"Without a word... you were truly going to leave without saying a single word."
I did not wail. The shock was too great for that—my voice came out abnormally low, abnormally calm.
"Hey, what are you doing out here at this hour..."
"I was anxious. I couldn't sleep, so I went to check whether you were still there... and the room was empty."
I clenched my fists. "I thought you would at least say something. Even a sneer—'don't bother waiting, I'm not coming back'—I thought you'd at least give me that much."
"...I was going to leave. I was a prisoner from the start, and this was never a place for me."
Aiden drew a cold, hard line. Stepping past me toward the outer wall, he went on. "Roselyne, you and I were doomed from the beginning. A duke's daughter and a barbarian prisoner. Can't you see the relationship itself is the mistake?"
"What mistake? You saved me, and without you I can't even breathe!"
"You stamping perfect attendance in my cell every dawn—that's a bit much for a thank-you, don't you think? You know it too. The rumors are already crawling all over the duchy. When the knights shut their mouths as you pass, it isn't out of respect. It's because they think you've lost your mind."
His sharp remark stopped me where I stood, dazed.
Lost my mind...?
"The more you tangle with me, the worse everything gets. I am not your refuge. The moment I walk out of this castle, I'm nothing but a barbarian treated like a monster. And if you keep clinging to me, all I'll ever be is a trash bin gnawing away at your reputation. If you understand that, then go back."
Aiden turned his back, cold and decisive.
But from between the sentences he had spat out, I stubbornly fished out a different intent.
My reputation...?
His words began reassembling themselves in my head of their own accord. Calling the relationship a mistake meant he blamed himself as something unworthy of me. Saying my reputation would rot from being tangled with him meant that, in the end, he was sacrificing himself and slipping away because he feared I would be the one to suffer for it.
Ah... so that's what it was.
The pain crushing my chest melted into a strange conviction. The man before me was not leaving because he hated me. Rather, because he cherished me far too much—because he feared becoming a stain on my life—he was choosing to vanish into the darkness on his own.
"...It's for my sake, isn't it."
A trembling laugh spilled from my lips. Aiden looked back at me with a puzzled expression.
"...What?"
"The reason you're leaving... it was because of me all along. Afraid I'd be troubled, trying to protect my honor—you're braving all this danger just to run away."
"No—don't get it twisted. I'm leaving to save my own hide. Whether you care or not, I've got my own road to walk!"
I ran and seized his sleeve. The moment the rough, sturdy fabric met my palm, the tears burst free.
"That's a lie. You always say that, but you watched over my breathing and corrected my speech habits. So I wouldn't fall apart, so I could stand up on my own..."
I clutched the hem of his clothes even tighter. "I know that making you my refuge is a burden to you. But Sir Knight, if you leave, I won't have the courage to face those cold stares again. So please... just stay by my side."
"Let go. Or do you want the guards waking up on us?"
He wrenched his hand free of mine. But I clung right back.
"Don't go... please..."
I dropped to my knees outright and grabbed hold of his trouser leg. The dignity of a duke's daughter, my pride—both had long since been ground into the cold dirt of dawn. All I wished for was that this man would never vanish from my sight.
"Let GO of me, dammit!!!!!!"
Aiden tried to pry me off, and I only clung on more stubbornly. And then, instinctively, I understood: if I let him go now, I would never see him again.
"Don't go... please!!!!!!!"
My scream tore the stillness of dawn to shreds.
And then—
Clatter-clatter-clatter—!
From not far off came a din of footsteps and the clash of steel plate. It was the knight order, out searching for the escaped prisoner. Torchlight came pouring toward the outer wall, and we were surrounded.
"Over there! The barbarian is threatening Her Ladyship!"
The Knight Commander's bloodcurdling shout rang out. Seeing me collapsed on the ground and wailing, they could barely contain their shock.
"Save Her Ladyship! Surround him, now!"
The knights drew their swords and hurled themselves at Aiden.
"FUCK!!!!"
I hauled my trembling body upright and planted myself in front of Aiden. Cold blade tips came to a halt right before my nose.
"No! Sir Knight wasn't trying to hurt me! I... I pushed myself to come outside and fell, that's all!"
"My lady, you're being deceived! This wretch threatened you and brought you here—"
"I said no! I came because I wanted to come! He didn't drag me out here!!!"
The knights traded bewildered glances. But their eyes still brimmed with murderous intent toward Aiden. Even with me taking his side, one fact would not change: a barbarian prisoner had been beneath the outer wall with the duke's daughter at dawn.
"...Subdue him. Her Ladyship must be confused from the shock."
At the Knight Commander's command, dozens of knights swarmed over Aiden. He shook off a few of them, but no one wins a fight that badly outnumbered. In the end, wound tight in heavy chains, he was pressed down into the ground.
Clank—!
Thicker, more intricate restraints bit into both his wrists. The knights hauled him away roughly, back toward the underground dungeon.
I stared, hollow, at his receding back.
"Sir Knight..."