Meeting the Squad (2) - Han Shin's First Birthday?
Kirill took the microphone and began the introduction.
"Good morning, everyone! I've got some wonderful news to share. Please give a thunderous round of applause to welcome the man newly and officially appointed as our club's manager—Han Shin!"
Han Shin stepped into the meeting room where the players had gathered.
Most of them, like Daniel Ballard and Jobe Bellingham, wore stiff, unreadable expressions. A few, though, were already smiling brightly.
Bellingham gave the back of Abdullah's head a sharp tap.
"What's got you grinning like an idiot, Abdullah?"
"Hehehe~ I'm a fan of the gaffer. When I played World Football Manager, I ran the K-Hannibal tactics and even won a treble with my team!"
"For God's sake, you've got time to play games? A treble? We can't even get promoted to the EPL."
"Come on, Jobe! Look at that pout. Don't tell me you already don't like the manager?"
"Would you like him? This isn't a fucking joke. And what's with that silk outfit? Does he think he's some kind of celebrity?"
Ballard cut in sharply.
"Both of you, quiet! The manager's about to speak."
"Yes, sir!"
"Yeah, yeah, got it, Captain~"
"And Jobe—watch that mouth. A manager is a manager. Let's hear him out first."
Abdullah kept snickering.
"Jobe! You do know this is all being filmed, right?"
"Like I care."
Han Shin stepped up onto the platform, accepted the microphone, and felt every pair of eyes lock onto him. He plugged a USB into the laptop that had been prepared and brought up the PowerPoint he had ready.
"Ah—! Ah—! Everyone, I'm truly delighted to meet you all like this. Some of you may already know me from the broadcasts; others, I'm sure, have no idea who I am."
"I'm the newly appointed manager of this club, Han Shin, from Korea. It's a pleasure to meet you all!"
Whistles and cheers erupted through the room.
"Welcome! Coach!"
"I imagine some of you are confused, while others are genuinely glad to see me. After all, I've had a rather unusual career path, haven't I? The media's been plastering me across every headline."
He brought up a series of articles from the BBC, The Times, and the Daily Mail—each one sporting a sensational title.
"Apparently my old neighbourhood and the school I attended completely lost their minds over it."
He displayed the banners Dong-ha had sent him, along with congratulatory messages from his friends.
"I wonder if any of you became the pride of your hometowns the way I did when you signed. Right now, Korea's in absolute chaos because of me."
"Hahaha!"
"On top of that, even the great José Mourinho left a comment about me."
He played Mourinho's interview clip.
"Football is not a game. If he succeeds, I will retire from management."
"Does everyone here agree with that legendary manager's opinion?"
Silence. No one answered.
"Well, I intend to succeed so spectacularly that I'll force him into retirement."
"..."
"And this is a comment from a football YouTube channel I used to watch."
"That was the most-liked comment. What this person said in Korean was that if I get sacked within three matches, he'll cut off his own dick."
"Pfft!"
Han Shin stared straight into the broadcast camera and pointed a finger at it.
"Whoever wrote that comment is definitely going to watch this documentary when it airs in Korea. When I find you, I'll make sure you become a eunuch myself."
"Hahahahaha!"
"There were other comments too—'How can you pick a manager through a game?', 'Sunderland are definitely getting relegated this season', 'An Asian manager is just a marketing stunt'."
"These keyboard warriors seem to think I was lying in bed, won the lottery, and somehow ended up here. The reason I'm standing in front of you is because I won the Manager War and earned this position fair and square."
He put up a commemorative photo taken with the gamers and YouTubers who had competed in the Manager War.
"These are the formidable opponents I defeated."
FM Master, TomFM, GOD Tactics... and so on.
The standout was IShowSpeed, shirtless with his tongue hanging out.
The room dissolved into laughter once more.
"Why are you laughing? Khh... They were all extremely tough opponents."
The youngest player in the squad, Chris Rigg, pointed a finger.
"You're laughing too, gaffer! You couldn't hold it in!"
"I am not, Chris."
He already knows my name?
Han Shin brought up photos of the unemployed managers among the competitors who still hadn't found a club.
Jesse Marsh, David O'Connell, Carlos Mendoza, Julian Parker, Miguel Santos, Ethan Taylor…
"These are the current and former managers I beat. Even though it was in the form of a game, every one of them competed with genuine sincerity to become Sunderland's manager."
"So if anyone's bitter about it, they should've entered themselves and won. Am I right or am I right?"
"You're right!"
Players who were close started ribbing each other.
"Did we hire a manager or a comedian? This is fucking hilarious."
"Right? Hahaha, and he's saying it all with a straight face—he's insane!"
"Alright, that's enough ice-breaking. The truth is, standing here in front of you right now is so overwhelming I can barely put it into words. Let me show you why."
Han Shin played a video of his own first-birthday ceremony.
"The adorable baby you're looking at right now is, of course, me. I was exactly one year old. That outfit is a traditional Korean hanbok—the same kind I'm wearing today. The people holding me are my parents."
On a floor mat scattered with a pen, a football, a toy gun, a ten-thousand-won note and other objects, the baby toddled about on unsteady legs.
"None of you will know what one-year-old me is doing. In Korea we call this ceremony a doljabi."
"A doljabi is a traditional ritual held on a child's first birthday. Various objects are laid out, and whatever the child picks up is believed to symbolise their future."
[He grabbed it! Shin picked up the little football!]
[Oh my~ Looks like our boy wants to be a footballer!]
[Our son needs to become a fine soldier—give me your hand. Come on.]
"That's as far as it goes. Looking at how I chose the football, maybe I was destined to become a manager from that very moment? My father clearly wanted me to pick the gun and become a soldier."
Next he displayed a photo of a young boy kicking a ball on a sandy pitch.
"This is me at nine years old, playing on a dirt pitch."
"I was a kid who dreamed the same dream as all of you. I've loved football since I was little. Just like you, I wanted to become a great player."
Han Shin stepped forward to the edge of the platform.
"My dream of playing in the Premier League was destroyed by this horrific injury, though."
He rolled up his trouser leg.
"Can you see this surgical scar?"
"Ohhh... shit."
"That's serious..."
An injury—something every player knew could be career-ending. The sight drew genuine, heartfelt groans from the entire squad. A few players turned their heads away, unable to look.
"It was a ten-hour major operation, and recovery took years."
[Han Shin in a hospital bed, bandaged head to toe, giving a thumbs-up]
[Him struggling forward on crutches with both hands]
"The months of treatment and recovery were a living nightmare. It was agony. The doctor told me my life as a footballer was over, and I fell into complete despair."
"While I was drowning in that hopelessness, a friend introduced me to Football Manager. At first I wouldn't even look at it."
"But the hospital room was so boring. Everyone said it was fun, so I figured I'd give it a try. The moment I opened my laptop and hit download, I was completely hooked. Obsessed."
"I poured two to three thousand hours into the game every single year. It was fun, and I was good at it. I became a veteran of the game in no time."
"Then I decided it would be a shame to keep my tactics to myself, so I uploaded them online as a joke. They blew up almost overnight. Even Griezmann started using my tactics."
He shared a short-form video that had gone viral.
Abdullah waved both hands frantically and shouted.
"Me! Me! I used the gaffer's tactics and won a treble too!"
"Is that so? Abdullah, right?"
"Yes, boss!"
"I don't know why, but that makes me ridiculously happy."
"Same here, boss! Hehehehehe."
"Ahem... Continuing the story. Even so, I couldn't be satisfied. I wanted to feel the grass under my feet again. My playing days were over, so this time it would be as a manager. I wanted to test my tactics for real."
"I earned my AFC C and B licences and tried to find coaching work in Korea. I sent player and tactical analysis reports to every single K League club. I waited for replies with my heart racing, but most of them never even answered."
"Except for one team—a club in a place called Busan. That club, by the way, was once managed by the late Ian Porterfield, whose remains are interred beneath this very stadium. Maybe Sunderland was always my destiny."
"This is the email one of the clubs that rejected me sent explaining why."
"In the end, the reason was always the same: lack of professional playing experience. Reality was cold."
"Then one day an email arrived telling me about a competition called the Manager War. The prize for winning was the managerial position at this very club."
"This is a once-in-a-lifetime chance, I told myself. I swore I would win and become a manager. The dream I couldn't finish as a player, I decided to pursue as the world's greatest manager instead. And the result is that I'm standing here right now."
"Being able to return to football and start my career alongside outstanding players like all of you... it makes me truly happy."
One particularly emotional member of staff wiped away tears and began clapping; the rest of the room followed.
"Thank you for the applause. We're not finished yet. Take a look at these Sunderland Three Musketeers."