Chapter 4: Class Placement Test (2)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 4: Class Placement Test (2)
My first master was a former gangster.
According to him, he wasn't some neighborhood thug, but a legendary figure who once ruled an entire era with his blade...
If a bald, pot-bellied old man like him could rule an era, I probably could have conquered a century.
Honestly, I didn't really believe him, but hey, if he says so...
Though he was a man with a blood-stained past, he once told me that as atonement for hurting so many people with his blade, he cut off one of his own hands and opened a Japanese restaurant with the conviction to make people happy with his knives.
Aside from his foul mouth, his skills were the real deal, so I learned a lot from him.
You know the type. Someone you really want to hate, but just can't.
“Boss, why do gangsters use sashimi knives?”
“Why are you curious about that?”
“No reason, just because. In movies, every Tom, Dick, and Harry runs around with a sashimi knife. I was curious if it's actually like that. Tucking one into the waistband of their black suits, shouting ‘Stab ’em!’ and charging forward like ‘Waaaaah!’”
“Tsk, tsk. Media these days is ruining you young punks. Most of those gangster bastards can't even afford a single T-shirt, let alone a suit, you brat.”
Even as he said that, the boss held his index and middle fingers about five centimeters apart, staring intently into my eyes.
“Since you make a living with knives, you should know that the bodies of all living creatures, not just humans, contract when a blade pierces their skin, right? Think about it. If you stab flesh with a wide kitchen knife, is it going to come out easily or not? A sashimi knife is narrow, so you can stab and pull it out of an opponent multiple times.”
“But why stab? You slice fish. Can't you do that to people?”
“Hey, you brat. As if a cut from a knife the size of a chopstick would slice anything well. You slice fish because they're lying down. If they're standing up, you can't even slice a loaf of bread in one go, you bastard!”
“In manga, they go swoosh and it slices snip... Isn't it just that you lack the skill, Boss...?”
“Even if the God of Sword came down, he couldn't do that! Stop talking nonsense and go over there and sharpen some knives!”
Eighteen years have passed, but I can still vividly feel the stinging sensation of my master's hand slapping my back with an exasperated look on his face.
* * *
Slice—
The trajectory of the sleek blade drew a silver line through the flesh. An arm clad in a gauntlet floated into the air before dropping to the ground with a thud.
“Huh?”
Even Mao Shun, whose arm had just been severed, tilted his head as if he couldn't comprehend what had just happened.
The cut was so clean that a fountain of blood only erupted after a few seconds had passed.
“Aaaaaaaargh! Fuuuuuck! Cao! Cao ni ma!”
Only then, feeling the sudden, searing heat, did Mao Shun scream. Kang Geomma quickly spun the sashimi knife in his palm, reversing his grip, and struck Mao Shun's neck.
The shoulder of the swinging Kang Geomma momentarily blurred.
That was the last scene Mao Shun remembered.
A red line appeared on his neck. Immediately after, his loudly screaming head fell off. The rolling head bumped against the toes of Mao Jin, who was standing behind him.
“Sh-Shun?!”
Mao Shun's eyes had gone cold and vacant.
His once-triumphant expression gradually filled with shock and terror. Mao Jin reflexively took a step back.
Even though he had seen it clearly with his own eyes, he couldn't understand what had just happened. The bastard in front of him had simply drawn a line with his knife—swoosh—and the flesh had been sliced—snip—like butter.
Even if he didn't know much about swords, common sense told him that a human body shouldn't be hacked to pieces this easily.
There wasn't even the sound of metal clashing against bone, as if the blade had precisely carved through the joints.
Was such a feat even possible for a human? And with a cheap raw fish knife like that, no less.
Thump. Thump.
His heartbeat pounded against his chest.
Thump. Thump.
The bastard's combat stance was awkward, as if he were pointing a knife at a person for the very first time, and he was trembling, panting heavily just five or six meters away.
But the hilt of the knife was perfectly glued to his palm. Like a part of his own body.
Who the fuck is this guy?
Mao Jin thought. As one of the genius twins of the Iron King Family, his mind raced.
‘I don't know what's going on, but he's exhausted.’
If so, he could turn the tables. Although slicing his twin brother in a single strike was a shocking display, the direct cause of defeat had been carelessness.
Mao Jin desperately suppressed the creeping dread and awkwardly picked up Mao Shun's severed arm.
The bastard still hadn't made any significant moves, only muttering something to himself.
“…24… 23… 22……”
...Why is he counting down? Mao Jin shook off the thoughts crowding his mind and equipped his brother's gauntlet onto his own right arm.
Click.
“Hup!”
The heavy weight and pressure caused the muscles in both his arms to swell.
His family's treasure and an S-rank Armament.
‘Security Gauntlet.’
Although the power had been halved when inherited by each twin, this armament only drew out the user's potential to the absolute limit when paired. Feeling his bones and muscles grow infinitely sturdier, a sinister smirk played on Mao Jin's lips.
“I don't know what kind of cheap tricks you pulled... but die, you pao cai bastard!”
Even though he spoke boldly, he couldn't easily shake off the terror that had already seeped into his body. All the more reason to erase his fear. Mao Jin clenched both hands and activated three Blessings simultaneously.
The ‘Blessing of Resolve’ which amplified defense, the ‘Blessing of Intervention’ which allowed him to instantly leap toward an enemy, and the ‘Blessing of Valor’ which increased the power of his fists. These were high-tier Blessings that the lowborn bloodlines of the Special Class couldn't even dream of.
“I'll crush your skull!”
The moment Mao Jin stomped his foot with a loud crack and closed the distance in an instant, the bastard's shadow stretched long in his field of vision and vanished.
Whoosh—
A brief sound of slicing air.
Rupturing sounds echoed in rapid succession.
Stab—
Stab— Squish—
Stab—
Squish— Stab—
Stab— Stab—
Crunch—
At the same time, a chilling heat pierced his entire body.
His neck stiffened like stone, preventing him from moving his head.
Soon, a heavy sensation filled his mouth, and a red liquid trickled down his jawline like a spiderweb.
Mao Jin barely managed to roll his eyes down to inspect his body.
One in his solar plexus and neck, four in his wrists and the tops of his feet, and three in his ribs and lower abdomen.
A total of nine knives were buried deep, right up to their hilts.
“Uh— Argh— Ack—”
His vocal cords had been severed, swallowing his screams back down his throat.
Slowly, his vision began to fade.
Even in the midst of this, the bastard was still muttering numbers to himself.
“…4… 3… 2… 1.”
At that moment.
“Aaaaaaaaargh!”
Through his rapidly fading vision, Mao Jin clearly captured that scene.
A demon in the shape of a human, was wailing to the heavens with a sword in hand.
* * *
When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was an unfamiliar ceiling.
As I moved my body slightly, I felt the unfamiliar, soft rustle of a blanket.
Turning my head, white curtains blocked my view on three sides, and the familiar smell of medicine filled the air. Was I in a hospital?
“Ugh...”
As I tried to sit up slightly, a short, nasal groan escaped my mouth. Feeling congested, I blew through my nose, and a rolled-up piece of bloody gauze popped out.
Swish—
Right on cue, someone pulled back the curtain on the right.
“Principal, the student has opened his eyes!”
A man in a white coat shouted loudly, followed by the sound of approaching footsteps.
“Oh my, it looks like he's awake.”
“……”
A green-haired beauty in a black robe, and a white-haired old man standing behind her with his hands behind his back. When the beauty gave a light wave of her hand, the doctor bowed and excused himself.
Why are these people here?
Although it was my first time seeing them in person, I recognized their faces.
Two of the Seven Stars who had subjugated the 6th Corps Commander of the Demon King's Army half a century ago.
Among them were Siegfried von Nibelung, the Sword Emperor, hailed as the strongest of humanity, and Medea Poison, the Sage and Academy Principal. I was dumbfounded by the appearance of these living legends.
“You look much more handsome in person than on screen, kid. Are you feeling alright?”
“Ah, yes. Well...”
The Academy Principal sat on the edge of the bed. With every movement, flashes of skin peeked through her clothes. It was impossible not to look.
Noticing my gaze, she parted her robe slightly, leaned in close, and placed her hand on my forehead.
“Look at you. It seems you still have a bit of a fever.”
Medea then moved her hand down toward her own groin, pretending to compare the temperature. Don't people usually check their own foreheads for that?
The combination of her sultry voice and seductive smile was far too dangerous for a healthy, adolescent boy like me. Besides, despite her youthful appearance, Medea was actually in her seventies.
I mentally sang the national anthem.
“I think I'm fine now.”
“Just say the word if it hurts. This big sister will nurse you back to health. Just. The. Two. Of. Us.”
Medea's fingers drifted toward the first button of her robe. Just as I was finishing the fourth verse of the national anthem, the Sword Emperor, unable to watch any longer, spoke up in disapproval.
“Medea, that's enough teasing.”
“Ugh, you old geezer. Fine, fine.”
Medea glared at him as she adjusted her clothes, which looked ready to slip off at any moment.
I was saved.
Damn it, Lord Sword Emperor! I knew I could count on you!
If my body had reacted to my desires, I would have been completely screwed.
Expulsion would be one thing, but if the reason was recorded as "Regarding the Case of a Perverted Freshman Getting Turned On by the Academy Principal Who Is Turning Seventy the Day After Tomorrow"...
It might be better to just commit suicide and prepare for my third life.
“…Are you really going to call me that? In front of a student, no less?”
“Isn't the chivalry you insist on so much about ‘keeping your word once spoken’? Surely you're not going back on your word? The great Sword Emperor himself?”
Letting Medea's sarcasm go in one ear and out the other, the Sword Emperor slowly turned his gaze toward me. His brilliant golden eyes released a faint trace of fighting spirit, as if trying to size me up.
His gaze was so piercingly sharp that my ribs instinctively tensed.
“What is your name, young man?”
“I'm Kang Geomma.”
“I'll get straight to the point. Kang Geomma, what on earth did you do?”
“……”
Honestly, I had patchy memories of what happened. The scene of me slicing up those trash twins with my sashimi knife flashed through my mind. After that, the last thing I remembered was a bluish landscape bleeding into my vision.
‘...’
The sensations back then hadn't felt like mine, but it was definitely me. As my response was delayed while I thought, the sharp blue sword at the Sword Emperor's waist rattled slightly.
Nothing good will come from getting on this monster's bad side.
I had to maintain a cautious attitude.
I had a rough idea of his personality.
The type commonly referred to as a kkondae. But I already knew exactly how to handle people like him.
Twenty years in the food service industry—in other words, I had spent nearly twenty years serving customers.
It was time to show humanity's strongest the Korean spirit of customer service.
Clear explanations, concise excuses.
“Even though it was a class placement test, I judged that their actions had crossed the line. However, I still believe my response was undoubtedly excessive. I will gladly accept any punishment for that, and I will comply with whatever disciplinary action is decided without a single complaint.”
At those words, the Sword Emperor stared intently at me.
Honestly, I thought it was a pretty good answer, but judging by his expression, it didn't seem to be what he wanted to hear. Still, I couldn't afford to look disheartened here.
If I kept playing the submissive card, I'd get swept up in this old-school Don Quixote knight's pace. A man needs to know how to bluff when the situation calls for it.
A real man's bluffing.
In Korea, we call it gao.
With a calm face, I met his shimmering golden eyes.
“……”
“……”
As an awkward silence settled over us, Medea, who had been looking back and forth between the two of us, let out a deep sigh.
“Sigh, you old geezer. How can you be so bad at dealing with young people?”
Medea clicked her tongue.
Then, her scowl instantly vanished, replaced by a bright, beaming smile directed at me.
“Despite his harsh words, Sieg was actually the one who cleared your blocked meridians while you were unconscious. They say people only get more stubborn as they age, right? Let it slide for my sake, teehee.”
“I believe I told you not to mention that, Medea. Ahem.”
“Look at him, getting all shy.”
The Sword Emperor did? Why?
No wonder my body felt light as a feather... well, that's an exaggeration, but it felt damply light, like a wet feather, despite my aching bones.
“While you were out, Geomma, we extracted the footage of what happened in the subspace and watched it with the staff. Throwing yourself in harm's way to protect a poor girl! You were like a prince straight out of a dream! No, a true hero!”
Medea gave me a sultry wink. That look of hers... in a different sense from the Sword Emperor, she seemed to view me as prey. Is she... drooling a little?
“And don't worry, we're not going to hold your actions during the exam against you. Honestly, those two only got admitted because their family buttered up the Academy elders, but those obnoxious twins ended up dropping out on their own at the same time. It was so satisfying!”
Even though we probably would have been in different classes, the mere thought of having to go to school with those bastards made my skin crawl. Hearing that they had dropped out brought an instant wave of relief.
“We didn't come here to interrogate you, so don't worry. We came to deliver some news.”
“Huh? What news?”
A bright, refreshing smile spread across her face.
“Geomma, you placed first! Congratulations!!”