Prologue
Prologue
Martial artists are idiots.
No, wait.
Since "idiot" is a word you call a human, the breed called Martial Artists can't even qualify as idiots.
Monkeys, apes, chimpanzees.
Unknown beasts that imitate humans.
The difference between those beasts and humans is clear.
Using tools, versus not using them.
And now, that difference has become even clearer.
Swordsmen swing swords.
The one I know can split the earth and cut the sky with a single stroke.
Wizards use magic.
Likewise, the one I know twists the very principles of the world.
And he also put a hole in my gut. Fucking bastard.
A Saintess can reattach severed limbs.
She can even save someone at death's door.
Archers shoot dragons with bows.
What about Martial Artists?
They use their fists.
Oh, and their feet too.
Well, according to them, once you reach a certain Realm, your whole body—including your fists—is reborn as the ultimate weapon.
But if you just pick up a weapon, you can get stronger more easily than that, can't you?
If you say that, Martial Artists counter that they can just break the weapon.
Then I counter again.
Just carry a lot of weapons, like me.
At that, a Martial Artist has no comeback and just sulks.
They get all sulky and whine about not carrying luggage.
The chimpanzee sniveling right next to me is exactly like that.
"Quit dripping snot."
"Hnn... hic... sob. Wh-what do I do, what do I do... What do I do. Because of me... because of me, Ronan... hic, I'm sorry, I-I'm sorry..."
"Guh... Ptuh. What the hell are you talking about? Why would I die because of you?"
"Kaloso's spell... Ronan... took it in my place..."
Right. I took the attack in place of that chimp.
I tried to block it, but because it was a surprise attack, a hole was blown clean through my gut.
I hid it so no one would notice, but she managed to catch on anyway. Maybe her intelligence went up after traveling with us.
Still, I refuse to agree with what that chimp Arisa said.
Because it came from a chimp.
"This didn't happen because of you, so quit blubbering and wipe your damn snot. It keeps dripping on my face. Ugh, shit."
"Oh, what do I do? An Elixir, an Elixir... no, Luna. Luna! Please, please do something. If it's you, Luna... if you offer a prayer..."
"...I-I understand. First, I'll do everything I can..."
"Luna, what are you talking about too? Don't waste Holy Power on a man who's already dead. Save it. And if you're going to do something, don't heal me—just wipe the snot off my face."
"...Shut up, Ronan."
Well, well.
That crazy Saintess started crying too.
Back when all the people of the Holy Kingdom were being ground to pieces, she didn't shed a tear. So why is she crying over someone like me dying?
I was going to say something to Luna too, but blood kept surging back up, making it hard to get a word out.
If you have a big hole in your stomach, isn't it normal for blood to come out of the hole?
So why the hell is it rising up my throat?
Furious, I ground my teeth and exhaled. Blood surged up along with my breath.
Seeing that, Arisa burst into tears and snot, which landed on my face again.
But now I didn't even have the energy to be annoyed.
Even that sticky sensation felt faint.
My body, sprawled on the ground, sank.
My eyelids were heavy, and my jaw was trembling.
Goddammit.
I looked at Paulo, who stood there unsteadily, forcing his chattering jaw shut.
Hero.
The first Hero to be chosen by a Sacred Relic, Paulo.
"Hey."
"...I'm sorry."
"Why are you apologizing? No, fine. If you're sorry, do me a favor."
I forced my aching chest to move and drew in a breath.
"Kaloso, that motherfucker who betrayed us. Make sure you tear him to pieces and kill him."
My eyes were definitely wide open, but my vision was going dark. My breathing was stopping, and my voice was fading.
"And make sure you kill the Demon King too."
Every word I managed felt like an awl being forced out through my throat.
But still, I had to say this one last thing.
"Hey, Arisa."
Cough. Black blood surged up.
At this rate, I couldn't even say what I wanted to say.
Fucking Kaloso.
I forced my organs, which were gradually shutting down, back awake and managed to say the last words I could.
"Quit blubbering."
I always used to pick on her for being ugly when she laughed.
She's even uglier when she cries.
"Chimps don't cry."
With those words as my last.
I died.
That's what happened.
That's what should have happened.
*
"I'm sorry, I may have misheard. What did you say your specialty was just now?"
"Martial arts."
"Martial arts... you said?"
"Yes."
"...Very well. Please wait a moment."
Click- click- scratch- scratch- slam!
"Done. The entrance exam date is listed in the second section, so please check it and be sure to attend on time. Thank you."
"Yes."
I took the paper from the receptionist, who was looking at me with pity.
A sheet of paper with a large printed photo of a girl with pink hair tied in twin tails.
Karelai Academy application for admission.
The applicant's name: Eliarnes Eustetia.
Specialty: martial arts.
I, who croaked with the Demon King right in front of me.
I was reincarnated.
As a chimp... no.
As a Martial Artist.