Cheeseburgers and the World Tree
The photo showed a single frame.
A famous franchise burger joint.
Every gaze in the restaurant had converged on one spot.
Following those stares led to a single woman occupying an entire four-person table by herself.
She was large. Not in any one particular part—overall.
Her height easily exceeded two meters. Her chest was the size of a head. She carried an air of shouldering the world’s sorrows alone, an overwhelming presence that seemed to carve itself into reality, and an aura so intense that the faint-hearted might faint on the spot.
Yet the most striking feature was the pair of massive sheep horns sprouting from her head—impossible to imagine how they stayed attached.
“……Is that some kind of cosplay?”
“I’m not sure…… but more importantly—”
“Yeah. She’s insanely beautiful……”
At first, people stared at the horns in confusion. Then they noticed her body was even larger than it first appeared. Finally, they simply lost themselves in her appearance.
She looked like a sculpture from ancient Greece or Rome—something so perfectly proportioned that it was impossible to look away. That was why no one had immediately registered how enormous she truly was.
From a distance, she seemed like an ordinary, beautifully proportioned woman around 170 centimeters tall. Only up close did the perspective break, revealing that she kept growing larger, until the realization hit that she was far too big to be human.
The strangest part was that no one felt any discomfort or revulsion at her size. Instead, every person present found themselves drawn to her—socially, personally, even physically.
“Number 101. Your cheeseburger is ready.”
“Mm.”
The woman accepted the seat-side delivery—a service the franchise rarely offered—and began carefully unwrapping the burger, seemingly unaware or unbothered by the dozens of eyes fixed on her.
‘—A hamburger. A real hamburger……!’
She was too overwhelmed by the sight of a cheeseburger after thousands of years to care about anything else.
The moment she peeled back the wrapper, the scent of juicy meat, spices, and melted cheese hit her all at once.
Astria opened her mouth with surprising delicacy and took a small, careful bite despite her enormous frame.
“……Whoa.”
“—Gulp.”
“Hehe……”
The onlookers let out soft gasps at the elegant sight. Some even felt a strange urge to be the burger itself.
‘Modern civilization is the best……!’
She finished the burger in what seemed like slow, dainty bites, yet the tray was empty in seconds. Astria stared at the empty tray with clear regret.
Unfortunately, the only money she had was the ten-dollar bill the man who saved her life had given her. Buying another was impossible.
‘I really want one more.’
As she stood to leave, someone who had been watching her eat approached nervously.
“E-excuse me!”
“……?”
“Could I…… take a photo with you?”
“……A photo?”
“Yes!”
Astria tilted her head, then remembered how conspicuous she must look—her impossible height, the horns on her head. She had assumed people would dismiss the horns as cosplay, but apparently they had made her seem like some kind of influencer instead.
After a moment’s thought, she smiled.
“—A hamburger.”
“Pardon?”
“Buy me one hamburger and I’ll let you take the photo.”
“Ah—yes! Of course!”
In this era, handing ten dollars to a stranger was nothing. People threw thousands at faceless streamers every day. Being asked for food instead of cash felt almost reasonable—especially coming from someone who looked like her.
After receiving the burger and posing for the photo, Astria sat back down and happily began eating again.
By the time she finished, dozens of people were already waiting with fresh burgers in hand.
“Um…… excuse me……”
“I bought one too, so could I……?”
“Please take a photo with me!”
Under normal circumstances she might have refused, but—
“—Come one, come all.”
Astria licked her lips and accepted every single one. She only left the restaurant after devouring dozens of burgers, looking thoroughly satisfied.
“……It’s huge.”
“It really is.”
The 72nd Ranger Regiment soldiers, guided by the elves, finally arrived at the elven village. Standing beneath the World Tree that towered into the sky, they couldn’t help but voice their awe.
No tree on Earth had ever grown this large. Most would have been cut down long before reaching such height, and the environment simply wouldn’t allow it.
After craning their necks until they ached, the soldiers turned their attention to the village itself.
There were no proper buildings to speak of—only elves.
“……More importantly,”
“Where are all the men?”
“I don’t see any old people or kids either.”
The soldiers had been openly admiring the elves’ generous figures and the way they displayed them without shame. Only now did they notice the complete absence of men, elders, and children.
The lack of men was understandable. This was clearly a hunter-gatherer society where even the women carried bows. They could simply be out on a group hunt. But the total lack of elderly and young was another matter.
“……May I ask something?”
“Of course. Ask anything, stranger.”
“Where did all the men go?”
“Men?”
The elf tilted her head at Bruce’s question, as if hearing the word for the first time.
“What is a man?”
“……Excuse me?”
“Have you ever heard of one?”
“No.”
The elves began discussing the unfamiliar concept among themselves. Bruce wondered if the Cradle of Wisdom was malfunctioning and tried different wording.
“Males. Male elves.”
“Ah! Males!”
“Elves have no males.”
“What? Then how do you have children—?”
“Children grow from the World Tree when needed.”
Bruce let out a hollow laugh at the ridiculous claim that life grew from trees.
Just then, the village chief appeared, having heard rumors of outsiders.
“—Welcome, strangers. I am Eruel, High Elf and chief of this village.”
“……U.S. Army, 72nd Ranger Regiment. Bruce.”
“We were told you would be coming.”
Bruce glanced at the elves who had guided them. There were no radios in sight—how had they communicated? Before he could dwell on it, Eruel smiled and dropped another bombshell.
“The Great One has instructed us to treat you with the utmost hospitality. From this moment on, you are honored guests of our village.”
“……We appreciate the sentiment. But why would this Great One—?”
“—She said she is very interested in Earth. She mentioned wanting to visit it herself someday.”
Bruce’s eyes widened at the news that some unknown divine being was interested in Earth. He turned to his men.
“……Give us a moment to talk among ourselves.”
“Of course. Would you like a room?”
“No, that won’t be necessary.”
Bruce led his squad a short distance away from the village. From his pack he pulled out a high-frequency jammer designed to prevent eavesdropping.
It had no effect on humans, but the elves supposedly had excellent hearing. Even sounds beyond human range might interfere.
The device had seemed pointless when first issued, but now he was grateful for whoever had thought of it.
“First, we need to report this back to Washington. After that—”
“……Captain. We can’t go back.”
“What? What are you talking about?”
One of the soldiers, trembling like a leaf, spoke up.
“……Have we ever had a private conversation since arriving here?”
“Of course we have.”
“Not that. I mean—have any of us said the word ‘Earth’ out loud since coming to this world?”
“Quiet. Lower your voice. They might be listening.”
“Exactly! They might be listening! We’d be lucky if they were only listening!”
The soldier shouted, then revealed what he had realized.
“How the hell do those bastards know the word ‘Earth’ when none of us have ever said it out loud!?”
“……Shit.”
Every soldier tightened their grip on their rifles.
If the elves knew a word none of them had spoken, it meant they had some way of obtaining information beyond simply listening.