59. Betrayal
“...I'm not showering with you anymore, Oppa.”
“Why.”
“You pretend to wash me but grope me all over... and then you put it in. Again.”
“I just got a bit hard while washing.”
“You're seriously... don't you have any shame?”
“You broke it first.”
“It's forbidden from now on.”
“You think forbidding it means I won't do it?”
“Wow, you're such a piece of trash. Not embarrassed saying that so boldly?”
“What's there to be embarrassed about between family?”
“Seriously... why do I like a guy like you?”
“Why? So you hate it?”
“...Not that.”
Messing around with my sister on the bed, I nearly dozed off for a real quick moment. I jolted awake with a gasp, saw the sun was about to set, and woke her up so we could shower together. Of course, seeing her wet from the water got me in the mood again, so yeah, we did it once more. But it wasn't too rough. She didn't refuse either. To help her cool off a bit, I dried her hair for her.
She grumbled at first, but as I touched her hair, she quieted down, which was cutely endearing for no reason. Even after turning off the dryer, I kept stroking it, and with her anger faded, she made a proposal in a softened voice.
“Oppa... up to three times is fine. But anything more... I'll do something else instead.”
“Something else?”
“Hand... stuff. Or... like that.”
“Just with your hand?”
“...Are you seriously such a perv, Oppa?”
“Whose fault is that?”
“Fine, then... I'll do it with my boobs too. You like my tits so much.”
“...”
“Why are you staring at me like you're dissatisfied?”
“What about your mouth?”
“...You're such a piece of trash. Total perv.”
After the shower, her face was a little flushed as she scolded me, so I pulled her into a hug and gave her a light kiss. Every time she tried to say something, I kept blocking her mouth with mine, smooching noisily to tease her, and her face gradually relaxed. So honest at times like this.
“Won't you?”
“...Kisses.”
“I just did.”
“When I ask for them. Promise you'll do it no matter what.”
“I promise.”
“...Then, when there's no choice... I'll use my mouth too.”
“When's 'no choice'?”
“On days we can't... do it. If I ask for kisses instead, you have to do it, okay?”
“...Can we do it now?”
What was there to be shy about now? But watching her peek at me from behind her hand covering her face made me want to overlap our lips even without her begging. The moment I saw her head trembling ever so slightly up and down, I kissed her deeper than before. Dangerous. But so sweet I couldn't stop. Before I knew it, we were addicted to tangling our tongues until we were breathless, devouring each other's breaths.
I was clinging to my little sister so much that even if she called me gross, I couldn't argue. We'd promised not to after the shower, so I didn't pounce, but while watching TV together, I hugged her from behind and kept sniffing her scent. They say humans are drawn to the scent of opposite sexes with different immune systems, but that doesn't apply to us. Same shampoo smell, but mixed with our subtly blending hormones—it's a scent I never get tired of. And it's not just me; whenever we're pressed together, you always bury your nose in my chest and sniff too.
“...Oppa. That's gross. Can't you back off a bit?”
“If I do, who knows when I'll get to do this again.”
“True, but doing this on the sofa is kinda...”
“You hate being stuck to me like this?”
“...”
She throws around words like hate, gross, trash, perv all the time, but when I actually ask if she hates it, she always shakes her head no, and if I ask if she likes it or if it's okay, she nods yes. Honestly, it's so cute it makes me want to pounce again.
“Oppa... back off for a sec.”
“No.”
“I wanna do something for you, so listen.”
“What're you gonna do.”
“Let go and I'll tell you.”
“...Fine, I'll hear you out.”
I loosened my arm from under her chest and gave her some space. She hopped off my lap and bolted to her room without looking back. I seriously considered chasing her, but she came right back soon after. Then she sat at the end of the sofa, patted her thigh, and called me over.
“Here.”
“What.”
“...Lie down first.”
“What're you gonna do.”
“I'll clean your ears.”
“...My ears?”
“You love it when I touch your ears too.”
I wondered what she was holding in her hand—it was a cotton swab. ...Yeah, ears are a sensitive spot for me. I like it when she touches them. But I don't like having them cleaned.
“What're you doing. Lie down already.”
“Scary. What if you stab my eardrum by accident?”
“Lie down before I actually do.”
“If I go deaf, I won't hear you moaning.”
“Ugh, seriously! Stop with the gross talk. Lie down. On my thigh.”
“Okay. Be gentle.”
After teasing my increasingly playful little sister lately, I obediently laid my head on her thigh. With my nose facing her belly button, of course.
“...Oppa. What're you doing.”
“You told me to lie down.”
“You like sniffing me that much?”
“Yeah.”
“...Gross.”
I figured I'd get smacked on the arm or head, but surprisingly, she started fiddling with my ear without a word. I savored the T-shirt soaked in her scent to the fullest, then lost focus to the rustling of the swab in my ear and drifted off with my teeth grazing her thigh.
“...Hey. What're you doing.”
“...”
“What's this in the living room. Get up.”
“...Huh?”
“It's not even 10 yet, and you two are passed out sprawled in the living room?”
I nearly thought we're fucked, but Mom was surprisingly calm, so I could play it off shamelessly too. Blinking my eyes unadapted to the light, I finally looked around. My sister was asleep with her head on the opposite sofa armrest. Blinded too, she had a familiar blanket over her face.
...Lucky. Not that there's much to be lucky about. We'd cleaned up after. I remembered falling asleep while she cleaned my ears. Nothing wrong with that.
“How was it? Have fun?”
“...Huh?”
“You said you were meeting friends.”
“Oh... yeah. Had fun. With friends. Ate lunch.”
“Dinner?”
“Uh...”
“You passed out without eating. Should've called Mom if you were coming to Aunt's.”
“Got super sleepy all of a sudden.”
Come to think of it, we hadn't eaten dinner. We'd been tangled up too long, and suddenly, boom—sleep hit us. I wonder if Gyeo-ul ate. Obvious she'd fall asleep seeing me do it first.
“When'd Gyeo-ul get here?”
“Gyeo-ul?”
“You were both out on the sofa—watching TV together and dozed off?”
“Oh... I got home late. She was already showered and watching TV when I arrived.”
“Jeez, you young kids come home after just lunch on Christmas Eve.”
“Their friends all had girlfriends, so separate dinner plans. I whined and barely got lunch together.”
My lies had become so natural. Like a split personality? More like I'd successfully created a character. The good, studious, filial son version of me.
...In reality, the world's most unfilial trash. But as long as I don't get caught. Just don't get caught.
“If you're that lonely, go date someone.”
“Eh, it'll happen when it happens. Or maybe not. If I'm lucky, someday.”
“...Sigh. Fine. Just don't cause trouble.”
“Do I look like trouble to you, Mom?”
“I raised my son so handsome—bound to have a few admirers.”
“I'm not that easy.”
“Always so smooth-talking.”
Mom, tired of me, pulled the blanket off my sister and started smacking her butt peeking from the dolphin pants to wake her.
“...Nngh, stop... it hurts...”
“Get up, my girl. No dinner?”
“Hungry...”
“I'll feed you. Up.”
“...Okay.”
Forcing my sister up, Mom headed to her room. Hearing water from afar, she was probably showering. Still drowsy and squirming, my sister rubbed her eyes, spotted me, and her eyes flew wide open.
“...Oppa.”
“Sleep well?”
“Are you crazy?”
“What suddenly.”
“What if we do that in the living room.”
Suddenly alert, she whisper-yelled just for me and smacked my arm.
...Isn't that fine?
“Falling asleep during ear cleaning isn't bad, right?”
“...You finished cleaning my ears. Wouldn't get off my thigh, so I poked you, and suddenly you hugged me.”
“...Could happen.”
“And kept hugging while sleeping. Till 8. So strong I couldn't escape.”
“Me?”
“Yeah. So I fell asleep sitting too. Because of you. Lucky I slipped out when I barely woke.”
Honestly, no memory. When I sleep next to her, it's dead-to-the-world deep sleep, no dreams. Probably 'cause it's so comfy.
...That was risky. Big bro with nose buried near little sister's belly button? Total perv on sight.
“What if we got caught.”
“No, really don't remember. Sorry. But we didn't, so it's fine.”
“Seriously... you always 'don't remember.'”
“First time, chill.”
“...Not first.”
“What?”
“You did it before. Before the military.”
“Me?”
“You wouldn't remember. Just me who knows. Ah, Mom too.”
“What'd I do. Tell me.”
“No.”
“Why, after spilling everything?”
“Well...”
Looking at me pitifully, she blinked shut, then gazed at me with her usual playful expression and said,
“If there are no secrets, no charm, right? ...I'll tell you later.”
“...I spilled everything, and you do that?”
“Could you spill all your porn vids on your computer or phone?”
“I don't have that stuff. You know 'cause you searched last time.”
“Still gonna check. And you have tons of dirty pics.”
“...Yeah, super dirty ones.”
“Perv.”
“Who took them.”
“Anyway, you're the perv.”
Pretending to kick each other with our legs but actually stroking, we stopped quick when the water from the master bedroom cut off faintly.
...Sorry, Mom. Think my brain's broken. Guilt hasn't vanished, but right now, I don't even think of it. I'm just happy. Even if I throw everything away, as long as I have you. That's enough.