Chapter 112: Baby Barbarian (5)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 112: Baby Barbarian (5)
Honkkk!
After pretending to fall asleep with the baby barbarian's snores serving as background music, I heard a rustling sound from the direction of the campfire. It sounded like the other three were having some kind of written conversation with each other. I could roughly surmise what the contents of said conversation were.
What are you going to do?
What else? Kill them now.
Starting with who?
They were probably deciding who to kill first. A proper son of a bitch would not let this opportunity pass them by. After all, it was a whopping double event, a chance to obtain two barbarian hearts worth 1.8 million stones.
The woman last. Let's deal with the barbarians first.
I predicted what conclusion they would have reached. They'd probably try to kill me or Kharon first. Therefore, I focused more on my hearing.
Step.
I could hear quiet footsteps slowly approaching me—two moving this way, and one moving toward Kharon.
They're planning on taking us both out at once.
That wasn't a bad decision on their part. They'd have to split up, but a simultaneous attack would reduce the probability of something unexpected happening. Even so, the outcome would be the same.
Step.
The moment the two figures stopped right next to me, my upper body sprang up. "I'm hungry—huh? What are you guys doing over here?"
The spearman and leader holding the sledgehammer were so surprised that they choked on their spit. When I sneakily glanced to the side, I saw the bowman aiming at the sleeping baby barbarian.
I pretended not to notice, though, playing it cool. "Ah, did you wake up hungry too?"
When I rubbed my stomach, they concluded that I hadn't seen the bowman. The guys exchanged glances with each other and then laughed awkwardly. "Th-that's right. I mean, I'm hungry. Why don't we go over there and have a meal together?"
"Is it meat?"
"...Of course. There's dried meat in my backpack over there."
"Dried meat!"
"Quiet. The others are asleep."
"Okay..." I nodded. Just as I was about to take the lead, something collided with the back of my head.
Whack!
It seemed the leader had whacked me with his hammer. "Huh?" But there was no way that my skull, which was fine even after taking blows from an orc warrior, would be cracked by something like that. "What was that?"
When I calmly looked back at them, I could see dazed looks on the two men's faces. I understood where they were coming from. Even though he'd hit me in the head with a hammer, I didn't even stumble, let alone groan in pain.
"Uh, umm..." The leader didn't even think to strike again and just stood there, frozen. Well, I was sure his thoughts were rather scrambled at the moment. After all, the most reasonable conclusion he could come to right now was that I had been hiding my identity, but that would be too devastating a truth to believe.
"Oh, did your hand slip?" I said with a grin.
"Uh, huh?"
"You shouldn't make mistakes like that, no matter how hungry you are."
Nothing I was saying made sense to me, either, but surprisingly the leader just flashed an awkward smile and nodded. "A-Ah! I'm sorry."
Sorry, my ass. Do I really look like that much of a dumbass barbarian?
"It seems I've made a mist—"
Whack!
"—ake..."
Slump.
Because I had no mace, I punched him in the face instead. The outcome was pretty much the same. The leader collapsed to the floor with the bones of his face sunken in.
"Huh...?" The spear bastard next to him was still staring at me like he had no idea what was going on.
"Ah, I was hungry, too, so my hand slipped." I said this as a genuine apology but it seemed he wasn't willing to accept it.
"Royce! What are you doing? Shoot!" The spearman gave the order in lieu of their unconscious leader.
Whip!
Soon, the bowman fired an arrow. I wondered if there was some kind of miscommunication at play here, though. He must've been ordering him to shoot me, but the arrow flew at the baby barbarian instead.
Stab!
Fortunately, Kharon, who woke up after hearing the spearman's shout, twisted out of the way and avoided getting hit in a vital area. "Ugh, Royce! What are you doing?!" With an arrow stuck in his shoulder, he quickly stood up and grabbed the bowman by the neck.
Cough, cough!
"Speak! I asked why you shot me!"
"I-It's... let me go...!"
"Aren't you going to explain?!"
Looks like I won't have to worry about that guy anymore.
When I moved my gaze back to the spearman, I saw him slowly stepping back toward the darkness. It was almost commendable that he could even come up with a plan to abandon his teammate in this situation, but did he really think that was going to work?
"...They really were plundererrrs." The fight wrapped up when Missha, who had been watching the proceedings from start to finish, struck him on the nape of the neck with the handle of a knife.
"How did this happen?!" Kharon asked, unable to hide his confusion. However, the choked-out and unconscious bowman had no way of answering.
"These guys are looters." With that, I kindly explained everything, from the fact that the heart of a barbarian sold for a high price to the fact that I hid my identity because these guys were suspicious.
"What? It can't be! These are my teammates...!" Our innocent baby barbarian refused to believe it. No, to be exact, he didn't want to believe it.
"Kharon, son of Tarson, grow up."
"... Are you trying to insult me?! I am already a warrior!"
"Then why are you trying to deny reality?"
Kharon pressed his lips together at my question. He must have already known deep down that everything I had said was true.
The barbarian race wasn't actually particularly unintelligent. It was just that they were not taught anything other than combat skills and, having spent their entire lives in the holy land, were overly naïve.
"That nasty bowman shot an arrow at you. If you hadn't dodged it in time, it would have lodged itself in your neck, not your shoulder." As I said that, I pulled out the arrow stuck in his arm. Although the pain must have been considerable, Kharon didn't even let out a sound, so I just kept talking. "These guys are looters. They are the scum of the labyrinth, and they tried to kill you and take your heart."
Nothing I was saying made sense to me, either, but surprisingly the leader just flashed an awkward smile and nodded. "A-Ah! I'm sorry."
Sorry, my ass. Do I really look like that much of a dumbass barbarian?
"It seems I've made a mist—"
Whack!
"—ake..."
Slump.
Because I had no mace, I punched him in the face instead. The outcome was pretty much the same. The leader collapsed to the floor with the bones of his face sunken in.
"Huh...?" The spear bastard next to him was still staring at me like he had no idea what was going on.
"Ah, I was hungry, too, so my hand slipped." I said this as a genuine apology but it seemed he wasn't willing to accept it.
"Royce! What are you doing? Shoot!" The spearman gave the order in lieu of their unconscious leader.
Whip!
Soon, the bowman fired an arrow. I wondered if there was some kind of miscommunication at play here, though. He must've been ordering him to shoot me, but the arrow flew at the baby barbarian instead.
Stab!
Fortunately, Kharon, who woke up after hearing the spearman's shout, twisted out of the way and avoided getting hit in a vital area. "Ugh, Royce! What are you doing?!" With an arrow stuck in his shoulder, he quickly stood up and grabbed the bowman by the neck.
Cough, cough!
"Speak! I asked why you shot me!"
"I-It's... let me go...!"
"Aren't you going to explain?!"
Looks like I won't have to worry about that guy anymore.
When I moved my gaze back to the spearman, I saw him slowly stepping back toward the darkness. It was almost commendable that he could even come up with a plan to abandon his teammate in this situation, but did he really think that was going to work?
"...They really were plundererrrs." The fight wrapped up when Missha, who had been watching the proceedings from start to finish, struck him on the nape of the neck with the handle of a knife.
"How did this happen?!" Kharon asked, unable to hide his confusion. However, the choked-out and unconscious bowman had no way of answering.
"These guys are looters." With that, I kindly explained everything, from the fact that the heart of a barbarian sold for a high price to the fact that I hid my identity because these guys were suspicious.
"What? It can't be! These are my teammates...!" Our innocent baby barbarian refused to believe it. No, to be exact, he didn't want to believe it.
"Kharon, son of Tarson, grow up."
"... Are you trying to insult me?! I am already a warrior!"
"Then why are you trying to deny reality?"
Kharon pressed his lips together at my question. He must have already known deep down that everything I had said was true.
The barbarian race wasn't actually particularly unintelligent. It was just that they were not taught anything other than combat skills and, having spent their entire lives in the holy land, were overly naïve.
"That nasty bowman shot an arrow at you. If you hadn't dodged it in time, it would have lodged itself in your neck, not your shoulder." As I said that, I pulled out the arrow stuck in his arm. Although the pain must have been considerable, Kharon didn't even let out a sound, so I just kept talking. "These guys are looters. They are the scum of the labyrinth, and they tried to kill you and take your heart."
"...I want to hear what they have to say."
Perhaps he was hoping there was some sort of misunderstanding at play here. Kharon asked to speak with the trio, and I had no reason to refuse. I just took their weapons and woke up one of the men from the pile.
"E-Eek!" I chose the bowman. I determined that he had suffered less damage than the others since he was only strangled. "H-Have mercy!" As soon as he saw me, the bowman kneeled and I took a step back. I wasn't the one who wanted to talk.
"Royce, are you really a plunderer?"
"Kh-Kharon...? This is all a misunderstanding. I'll explain everything, so first wake the others—"
"Answer me. What have I misunderstood?"
"That's..." The bowman couldn't answer Kharon's question. That made sense, because it wasn't a misunderstanding. To save time, I tossed the notebook I found while taking their weapons to Kharon.
"What is this?"
"Read it for yourself."
"I... don't know how to read."
Oh. Right. "Then why don't you ask him to read it for you?"
"I can... do that."
Soon, Kharon handed the notebook he had received to the bowman. It contained the written conversation these three had shared while we were pretending to be asleep. As soon as he saw this, the bowman, who was dripping in cold sweat, dropped his head. It seemed that he had reached the acceptance stage.
Not on my watch. "If you don't read it, I will kill you. Very painfully."
"I-I'll read..." Soon, the bowman began to read the text slowly and with trembling lips:
Briol, why did you agree to let him stay? Are you going to kill him too?
He's practically begging to be killed. There's no need to let them walk away alive, is there?
I think this guy is suspicious. The fact that he's looking for a night companion on the second floor... not even a barbarian is that stupid.
Suspicious? I agree with Briol. You've killed so many barbarians and you still don't know? They are just walking...
The bowman, who had been struggling to keep reading, shut his mouth at one point, so I broke one of his fingers. "Did my words sound like a joke to you?"
"Ahhh!"
"Continue."
"Th-they're just walking monsters! Th-their intelligence is similar to monsters, and especially in the sense that the person who catches one owns them." After finishing the sentence, the bowman carefully studied Kharon's reaction.
Kharon was trembling. "...Who said that?"
"Victor..."
"Yeah, that guy... All right, go on."
After confirming that it was the spearman's line, Royce continued the story. "Besides, even setting aside the barbarian, isn't there already enough of a reward here? She seems to be as stupid as the barbarian, b-but her face is...on the pretty side..."
"Continue."
"Agreed. But I don't know how a bitch fooling around with a barbarian would be with—"
"Enough!" Missha stepped in and ripped the notebook from his hands. Then, after quickly scanning it, she asked the bowman, "This, and this here. Who wrote this?" Her voice was as cold as ice. I'd never seen her like this before.
When the bowman pointed at the leader with trembling hands, Missha looked at me and said straight up, "Bjorn, I'm going to kill this one."
"Do as you like."
In any case, there was no need to make Missha angrier, so I made the bowman skip the obscene parts. After that, discussions continued about who to kill first and how.
"I-I'll take care of Kharon," he read. "It pissed me off that he l-looked down on me for being an archer. He doesn't even know that he'll be dead after this hunt is over...'"
The conversation ended there with the bowman's line. After a moment of silence, Kharon opened his mouth. "I... don't get it at all." The first thing that came out of his mouth was a question. "...Did I do something wrong?"
Despite it all, he first found fault in himself. Of course he didn't do anything wrong. It was just that this world was too brutal for someone so innocent.
"Bjon, son of Thor..."
"It's Bjorn, son of Yandel."
"I see. So you're the famous... Good. Tell me, Bjorn, son of Yandel, are people like this common in the labyrinth?"
"They are."
This side of the labyrinth wasn't spoken about in the holy land. "Then...what do I do?" asked the young warrior who had been faced with this for the first time, as if sincerely hoping to learn the answer. As if, if I told him how to handle this, he would definitely follow my advice to the letter.
So, I answered him. "Doubt everyone, whether they be human or a different race. Just as I fooled them, conceal an axe behind your innocence. And even if it's annoying and a little difficult, always think before you act."
"...Can I really do that?"
"It's not about whether you can, it's about what you have to do," I said firmly. "If you cannot distinguish between those two things, you will have no choice but to be a child forever. And remember this: if you kill one of these people, many more young warriors will be spared."
At my words, Kharon pressed his lips together. "I see. That's why you..." He now seemed to understand why I did what I did.
"Now, what are you going to do?" I asked for the last time. "I will abide by your choice."
Squeeze.
Kharon, the young warrior and son of Tarson, just tightened his grip on his axe.
Slice!
In one swing, he finally became a warrior. The bowman's head flew off as Kharon drew a rough x across his neck.
Missha, who had been waiting for this, woke the leader up by stomping on his groin and promptly slit his throat. I snapped the neck of the remaining one. He woke up in the middle of it and begged for his life.
"P-Please spare me! I'll live an honest life from now on..."
"Do you mean to say you'll be an honest plunderer?"
"A-An honest plunderer? Ah, yes, yes! I will—"
His promises meant nothing. There was only one way to be an honest plunderer.
"Here, it's a potion."
"Thanks."
Once clean-up was pretty much finished, I handed Kharon a potion and he poured it on his shoulder wound.
"Why don't you pour more?"
"If I do, it will heal completely. Scars are evidence of past mistakes. I don't want to forget what happened here."
"If you say so." I knew barbarians had a habit of regarding scars as medals, so I didn't contribute anything else.
"Thank you, Bjorn, son of Yandel. Now I know what I have to do next." His eyes were already different from earlier. At the sight, I was officially convinced. "I won't be able to do it like you, but I'll crush the skulls of those I come across—no, even if I have to go find them myself. Also, if I see a young warrior, I will tell them about what I went through today and warn them, just as you did today, for the sake of my people."
With his new outlook on life, it seemed he'd be able to make it clear to most plunderers: from this moment on, if you touched a baby barbarian, you'd be fucked.
"...I want to hear what they have to say."
Perhaps he was hoping there was some sort of misunderstanding at play here. Kharon asked to speak with the trio, and I had no reason to refuse. I just took their weapons and woke up one of the men from the pile.
"E-Eek!" I chose the bowman. I determined that he had suffered less damage than the others since he was only strangled. "H-Have mercy!" As soon as he saw me, the bowman kneeled and I took a step back. I wasn't the one who wanted to talk.
"Royce, are you really a plunderer?"
"Kh-Kharon...? This is all a misunderstanding. I'll explain everything, so first wake the others—"
"Answer me. What have I misunderstood?"
"That's..." The bowman couldn't answer Kharon's question. That made sense, because it wasn't a misunderstanding. To save time, I tossed the notebook I found while taking their weapons to Kharon.
"What is this?"
"Read it for yourself."
"I... don't know how to read."
Oh. Right. "Then why don't you ask him to read it for you?"
"I can... do that."
Soon, Kharon handed the notebook he had received to the bowman. It contained the written conversation these three had shared while we were pretending to be asleep. As soon as he saw this, the bowman, who was dripping in cold sweat, dropped his head. It seemed that he had reached the acceptance stage.
Not on my watch. "If you don't read it, I will kill you. Very painfully."
"I-I'll read..." Soon, the bowman began to read the text slowly and with trembling lips:
Briol, why did you agree to let him stay? Are you going to kill him too?
He's practically begging to be killed. There's no need to let them walk away alive, is there?
I think this guy is suspicious. The fact that he's looking for a night companion on the second floor... not even a barbarian is that stupid.
Suspicious? I agree with Briol. You've killed so many barbarians and you still don't know? They are just walking...
The bowman, who had been struggling to keep reading, shut his mouth at one point, so I broke one of his fingers. "Did my words sound like a joke to you?"
"Ahhh!"
"Continue."
"Th-they're just walking monsters! Th-their intelligence is similar to monsters, and especially in the sense that the person who catches one owns them." After finishing the sentence, the bowman carefully studied Kharon's reaction.
Kharon was trembling. "...Who said that?"
"Victor..."
"Yeah, that guy... All right, go on."
After confirming that it was the spearman's line, Royce continued the story. "Besides, even setting aside the barbarian, isn't there already enough of a reward here? She seems to be as stupid as the barbarian, b-but her face is...on the pretty side..."
"Continue."
"Agreed. But I don't know how a bitch fooling around with a barbarian would be with—"
"Enough!" Missha stepped in and ripped the notebook from his hands. Then, after quickly scanning it, she asked the bowman, "This, and this here. Who wrote this?" Her voice was as cold as ice. I'd never seen her like this before.
When the bowman pointed at the leader with trembling hands, Missha looked at me and said straight up, "Bjorn, I'm going to kill this one."
"Do as you like."
In any case, there was no need to make Missha angrier, so I made the bowman skip the obscene parts. After that, discussions continued about who to kill first and how.
"I-I'll take care of Kharon," he read. "It pissed me off that he l-looked down on me for being an archer. He doesn't even know that he'll be dead after this hunt is over...'"
The conversation ended there with the bowman's line. After a moment of silence, Kharon opened his mouth. "I... don't get it at all." The first thing that came out of his mouth was a question. "...Did I do something wrong?"
Despite it all, he first found fault in himself. Of course he didn't do anything wrong. It was just that this world was too brutal for someone so innocent.
"Bjon, son of Thor..."
"It's Bjorn, son of Yandel."
"I see. So you're the famous... Good. Tell me, Bjorn, son of Yandel, are people like this common in the labyrinth?"
"They are."
This side of the labyrinth wasn't spoken about in the holy land. "Then...what do I do?" asked the young warrior who had been faced with this for the first time, as if sincerely hoping to learn the answer. As if, if I told him how to handle this, he would definitely follow my advice to the letter.
So, I answered him. "Doubt everyone, whether they be human or a different race. Just as I fooled them, conceal an axe behind your innocence. And even if it's annoying and a little difficult, always think before you act."
"...Can I really do that?"
"It's not about whether you can, it's about what you have to do," I said firmly. "If you cannot distinguish between those two things, you will have no choice but to be a child forever. And remember this: if you kill one of these people, many more young warriors will be spared."
At my words, Kharon pressed his lips together. "I see. That's why you..." He now seemed to understand why I did what I did.
"Now, what are you going to do?" I asked for the last time. "I will abide by your choice."
Squeeze.
Kharon, the young warrior and son of Tarson, just tightened his grip on his axe.
Slice!
In one swing, he finally became a warrior. The bowman's head flew off as Kharon drew a rough x across his neck.
Missha, who had been waiting for this, woke the leader up by stomping on his groin and promptly slit his throat. I snapped the neck of the remaining one. He woke up in the middle of it and begged for his life.
"P-Please spare me! I'll live an honest life from now on..."
"Do you mean to say you'll be an honest plunderer?"
"A-An honest plunderer? Ah, yes, yes! I will—"
His promises meant nothing. There was only one way to be an honest plunderer.
"Here, it's a potion."
"Thanks."
Once clean-up was pretty much finished, I handed Kharon a potion and he poured it on his shoulder wound.
"Why don't you pour more?"
"If I do, it will heal completely. Scars are evidence of past mistakes. I don't want to forget what happened here."
"If you say so." I knew barbarians had a habit of regarding scars as medals, so I didn't contribute anything else.
"Thank you, Bjorn, son of Yandel. Now I know what I have to do next." His eyes were already different from earlier. At the sight, I was officially convinced. "I won't be able to do it like you, but I'll crush the skulls of those I come across—no, even if I have to go find them myself. Also, if I see a young warrior, I will tell them about what I went through today and warn them, just as you did today, for the sake of my people."
With his new outlook on life, it seemed he'd be able to make it clear to most plunderers: from this moment on, if you touched a baby barbarian, you'd be fucked.