The Sword That Burned the World Tree

"Hah."

I dropped to my knees in the center of the simulation room and settled into a devout, formal seat. Laid out before me was our precious Blooming Weapon — the branch of the Withered Ancient Tree.

"I'll figure this out. No matter what."

I stared wide-eyed, combing through every last line of the information window floating above the branch.

"Hmm! Nice!"

Okay. Obviously I wasn't going to crack it from a single read-through. I combed through the information window all over again, top to bottom. And three seconds later, I said:

"Angel, how the hell do I do this?"

"Player, aren't you giving up a little too fast?"

"Nngh..."

Getting a Blooming Weapon was fantastic. No argument there — it was the best. A few minutes ago I'd been so happy I could have taken flight. But in all that excitement, I'd completely forgotten one crucial fact: a Blooming Weapon was only incredible if you met the conditions. And finding those conditions was a nightmare.

Up to now I'd been spoon-fed every scrap of information from communities and YouTube. I didn't have the faintest clue how to actually hunt a condition down myself.

"Don't tell me I have to jam this thing into my own body?"

I muttered it under my breath, remembering the blooming condition for the Demon's Magic Bullet. No. No matter how lazy the developers were, they wouldn't recycle the exact same gimmick.

"Just try something, Player! That's how blooming conditions work — you've got to try every weird thing you can think of before you find it!"

Angel clenched her tiny fists beside me and pumped them like a cheerleader. "Yap! Yap!"

"Okay!"

Right. A real man charged in first and thought about it later. I snatched up the branch and got to my feet.

Let's think this through, one step at a time. The name said it all — this branch had sprouted from that withered ancient tree I'd run into in the Otherworld. That was why, as the information window spelled out, it had such high fire resistance.

"Then I should dump water on it!"

High resistance to fire. So, simple logic: if I hammered it with the water attribute, something ought to happen, right? I wrapped Water Spirit Energy around my right arm and slowly fed water into the branch. It got damp. That was it. No reaction whatsoever.

Fine. Then what if I froze it?

I clenched my fist and flash-froze the branch.

Crack—!

The moisture-soaked wood seized up in the cold, exhaling a pale veil of frost.

"Wh-whoa?!"

The branch started forcing out every drop of water it had absorbed, and the bark split open with a sharp, ugly crack. There was a change. There was actually a change.

"Angel! Is this it?!"

I spun toward her, buzzing with hope.

"P-Player! Stop it right now! It's breaking!!"

Oh, shit!

Angel's panicked shout sent Fire Spirit Energy flooding around my hand at something faster than light, and I thawed the branch on the spot.

"This thing can actually break?"

"Of course it can! Like the information window says, right now it's just a branch that came off a withered ancient tree!"

Disaster. Every plan I'd been cooking up had just gone up in smoke.

"Angel. If this breaks, do I get a refill?"

I asked on the off chance. Angel stared at me like I'd grown a second head.

"Do you really think so, Player?"

Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes.

"Fine. Then I'll take it slow. Nothing that breaks it."

I turned the Withered Ancient Tree's properties over in my head. Strong fire resistance... so what if I burned it right up to the limit of that resistance? Would something shift?

Yes. That was it. This kind of reverse thinking was exactly what blooming conditions were made of.

Just dumping fire on the branch and waiting for it to burn would have taken forever — but I had a broken skill called Spirit Ground. I designated the branch and slashed its fire affinity into the dirt. Then I kindled a small flame at my fingertips.

Fwoosh!

Fire bloomed from my fingers and crept onto the wood. It crackled as it caught, and the branch began to shrivel. No way. Was this actually it?

"Angel!"

I turned toward her, beaming — and found her staring back in horror, both hands waving wildly.

"PUT IT OUT!!!"

Fuck.

I slammed Water Spirit Energy around the branch and killed the fire. Even so, a layer of black soot was already baked into the wood.

"Aaaagh! My baby!!"

I wailed, clutching the branch to my chest. What was this? Where had my beautiful child gone — the one that had been so sleek and smooth? Now it was split and blackened and covered in soot. Daddy's sorry! Daddy messed up!

"Waaaaah!!! Angel-aemon, help me!"

I howled in despair and looked to Angel for salvation. She just shook her head, looking genuinely sorry.

"The fact that I'm even telling you it's not the right condition is already ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠me helping you as much as I possibly can."

She wasn't wrong. Without Angel, this branch would have either frozen into a thousand pieces or burned to ash. One or the other.

"They say failure is the mother of success, Player. Just take it one step at a time from here."

Her voice was gentle. Encouraging.

"Yeah. A real man doesn't get discouraged this early."

I hadn't failed. I'd simply confirmed that those two things were not the conditions. I steeled myself and dove back into the experiments.

I quit forty minutes later.

"Heh heh heh. Fuck."

I stared hollowly at what I was holding. The branch from forty minutes ago had looked downright pristine by comparison. The thing in my hand could barely even be called a branch anymore. It was just a straight, stick-shaped object.

"Ugh..."

Angel's lips twitched as she looked at me, like the words were physically fighting to get out.

"Go on, Angel! Spit it out!"

I practically begged her. She shut me down without a flicker of hesitation.

"I can't. If I go against Causality again this time, I will actually get fired!"

"Ah, screw it!"

I flopped onto my back and stared at the ceiling. There was just ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠no answer. The more I tried, the more the branch got wrecked, and nothing — absolutely nothing — worked. At times like this, it was better to just cool your head.

"Tch."

I gazed blankly upward, and every stray thought in my skull came wandering out. Among them, the memory of Alice going down on me that morning started screaming particularly loud.

"That was so good..."

My little guy swelled up on its own, and dirty thoughts started blooming one after another.

"Ah! That's it!"

A brilliant idea struck me. Not about the blooming condition, obviously — a stroke of genius for putting this time to genuinely productive use. I drew my sword and called the elemental spirits.

My stacked, voluptuous Fire Spirit. The Earth Spirit with that gorgeous copper-bronze skin. The slender, filthy Wind Spirit. The Water Spirit with those outrageous hips.

Yes. My brilliant idea was none other than a spirit strip show.

"Come on, dance!"

The innocent spirits burst into giggles and started swaying, shaking themselves to a rhythm only they could hear.

"I really am a genius."

Every time they moved, their breasts bounced and their secret places flashed into view. Ah. The stress just melted off me. This was paradise.

I was watching them dance in complete, luxurious peace when something felt off.

"Hm?"

The Earth Spirit mixed in among the others was acting strange. She wasn't swaying with that fluid, effortless grace the rest of them had. She was jerking her body around stiffly, like she was terrified of something.

"Earth, what's wrong?"

I asked, sensing there was something here — and the Earth Spirit trembled, pointing a shaking finger in a particular direction. I followed her gaze. She was pointing at my branch of the Withered Ancient Tree.

No way. This?

My eyes flashed, and I looked at Angel.

"Mmph! Mmph!"

She had both hands clamped over her mouth and was writhing in place, practically vibrating with excitement.

Holy shit. This was it!

I snatched up the branch, strode over to Earth, and held it out.

"What is this, Earth?"

"I... I don't like it..."

She trembled, inching backward to get away from the branch I was offering.

"What is it, Earth?"

I asked again, casually moving the branch aside — and this time, she answered.

"The sword that burned our mother."

"Huh?"

Killed her mother? Spirits had moms?

"Who's your mother?"

"Lady Yggdrasil, the Cosmic Tree."

A name dropped that sounded important just from the sound of it. This was it. This was the biggest hint on the road to the answer.

"Mmph! Mmmph!"

Beside me, Angel twisted in place with her mouth still covered. I was really, genuinely almost there. I swallowed.

I turned the ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠information over in my head. This branch was the sword that had burned the Earth Spirit's mother — the Cosmic Tree, Yggdrasil. And for that piece of information to line up with the blooming condition... what did I actually have to do?

Don't tell me.

I looked at Angel.

"This isn't going to kill her, right?"

Angel lit up like she was about to faint from joy.

"Yeeeeeess!!!"

So this really was the answer. I didn't hesitate. I took the branch in my right hand, and I drove it into the Earth Spirit.

"Ahh..."

She stared hollowly at the branch buried in her own body. For a long moment she just looked at it, empty — and then, as if she had come to a decision, she took hold of it with both hands.

Fwoosh.

My branch ignited. Not ordinary flame — a pale vermillion fire, like the sun itself, surged up from the wood.

The Earth Spirit murmured it calmly, even as she went up in flames.

The fire roared higher. The Earth Spirit dissolved into it, and the branch in my hand began to change.

The forearm-length stick stretched longer and longer, then stopped. And then, slowly, it began to bloom from the tip. The blunt end sharpened into a keen sword point. The thin body thickened, and patterns like flickering flame etched themselves into the blade. At last, even the part I was gripping transformed — reshaping itself into a hilt that settled into my palm as if it had been made for it.

"Ah... ah..."

I stared at the sword like something had possessed me, my mouth working soundlessly. I had been about to say something. I know I had. But the awe and the shock had sealed my throat so completely that nothing else would come out.

Sunlight flowed softly through the blade itself. Along the flame-wreathed patterns of the edge, crimson solar flares danced and writhed. I couldn't take my eyes ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠off this bewitching sword. Slowly, I traced my fingers up the spine of the blade from the base. The sunlight that had been glowing faintly flared brighter at my touch, answering me.

"Angel...."

I spoke to her in a daze, my eyes still locked on the sword.

"Yeeeeeess!! Player!!!"

"This is it, right?"

"Of course it iiiis!!! You're the first Swordsman — and the first person ever — to possess a Blooming Weapon that was forged into a sword!"

Ah. Holy shit.

Appraise!

With trembling hands, I pulled up the information window.

This... this was insane. This was actually, genuinely insane. My hands started shaking. I grabbed my own mouth with my empty left hand, half-convinced I was dreaming. I could feel the pressure of my fingers. It wasn't a dream.

And with that, the torrent of emotion I'd dammed up in a corner of my chest burst its banks.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!"

Jackpot! Absolute, world-ending jackpot!

"FUUUUUUCK!!!"

A sword this insanely cool — and stacked with abilities on top of it?!

"KYAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

A scream of pure joy tore up from the deepest part of my soul. I'd been walking around with an iron sword this whole time, and now it was Levatein?! Now I could show it off with my head held high! The sword I used was Levatein! Levatein!

"KYAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

I screamed and cheered like a man who'd lost his mind — completely failing to notice Violet staring in at me from outside, her expression utterly vacant. I just surrendered myself to the torrent exploding inside my skull, and screamed all over again.