Live Well
Evidence secured.
I casually scooped up the battered, crumpled slip of chuncheopja. These auspicious spring couplets were precious items, each character brushed by hand by the officials of the Seungmunwon. Desecrating royal palace property took serious guts.
Mistaking my silence for terror, however, the older apprentice maids puffed up their chests with triumphant smirks.
"Only a handful of senior maids and Lady Suk-jeong are allowed anywhere near the west wing of Chwiseondang! An aegi-nain like you has no business being here!"
"Exactly. If we tell the court ladies you were snooping around, you'll get your bare buttocks paddled black and blue!"
"……."
My jaw dropped in sheer astonishment, a chill running down my spine. It was not their childish threats of a whipping that rattled me.
Did she just say Lady Suk-jeong?
Suk-jeong was a name that appeared without fail in every single historical record documenting the demise of Jang Hui-bin. She was none other than the central instigator of the notorious Shamanic Curse Incident against Queen Inhyeon.
The illicit shrine hasn't even been erected yet, but something is definitely already in motion.
Poke.
"Hey! What are you daydreaming about with that stupid look on your face?" A sharp little finger repeatedly prodded my forehead. "Look at her. She's terrified we'll run to the head court lady."
I shifted my gaze toward the pair of snickering bullies. Here I was, racking my brain trying to avoid the metaphorical executioner's blade dangling over all our heads, while these brats had nothing better to do than torment a toddler. Irritation flared hot in my chest.
Inhaling deeply, I tilted my chin up and glared straight into their eyes.
"You said aegi-nains aren't 'llowed in the west wing, right? Then why are hamanims here?"
"What? W-Well, that's……"
Hit where it hurt, the girls flushed bright crimson.
"I'm gonna tell on you too! I'll tell them you were wandering around here first! Then we'll all get paddled together!"
"How dare you talk back to us!" the taller maid shrieked, her face twisting into a nasty sneer that looked unnatural on a child. "Wait, isn't it weird? Girls as young as you almost never get admitted into the palace. Your parents abandoned you, didn't they? They couldn't care less about you, so they shoved you into the palace to get rid of you! How pathetic. A worthless, abandoned brat……"
Did she just…… insult my parents?
I could let a lot of things slide, but this crossed the line.
"Take that back! Don't you dare talk bad about my mommy and daddy!"
"And what are you going to do about it if I do?"
The tall girl shoved me hard. I scrambled to keep my footing, but my stubby toddler legs stood no chance against the strength of a ten-year-old. As I tumbled backward, flailing wildly for balance, my little hands clamped onto something soft and stringy.
Rrrrriiiip!
"Aaaagh! Let go! Let go of my hair!"
……It took me a solid second to realize I had grabbed two fistfuls of her scalp. I swear on my life, it was not premeditated. It was purely an instinctual struggle for self-preservation!
"What in heaven's name is going on here? Step away from each other this instant!"
A commanding voice sliced through the courtyard.
"Seol-hyang hamanim……!"
Seol-hyang had always been kind to me, but it was far too early to assume she would blindly take my side.
Get a grip. Play your cards right.
I immediately released my grip, shaking the loose strands of hair from my fingers, and allowed my shoulders to slump in utter misery.
"What do you two think you're doing, ganging up on a tiny child?" Seol-hyang's reprimand echoed off the stone walls.
"Hang-ah-nim, listen to us! She attacked me first! Look at how much hair she ripped out!"
"She's telling the truth! This kid is completely unhinged! She was sneaking around where she didn't belong, and we were only trying to stop her……"
"If you knew sneaking around here was forbidden, what were the two of you doing here in the first place?"
"Th-That's……"
Their mouths snapped shut. Ten-year-old logic had hit a dead end.
Now!
Seizing my moment, I held up the crumpled chuncheopja where it was plain to see. Keeping my head bowed and my bottom lip trembling, I smoothed the wrinkled paper over my knee with frantic, clumsy little pats.
"Is that…… a chuncheopja? How did something so precious end up like that?!" Seol-hyang's eyes widened in genuine horror.
Right on cue, my grueling efforts bore fruit.
Drip.
A single, fat teardrop splashed onto the wrinkled calligraphy.
"Those hamanims…… they picked on me and crumpled the paper…… even though it's so important……"
"Good grief," Seol-hyang gasped in outrage.
"And then…… they said my parents threw me away……"
"They said what?" Seol-hyang looked ready to burst a blood vessel.
"My mommy and daddy passed away, but I'm not thrown away! I was loved so, so much! By mommy and daddy, and by my big brother……"
Toward the end, raw emotion cracked through my facade. The words came from somewhere real and painful.
The two older girls stammered, scrambling to invent excuses, but Seol-hyang cut them down with a single, icy glare.
"You two have crossed the line."
"Hang-ah-nim! We're sorry!"
"Please forgive us! Just this once!"
Seol-hyang showed no mercy. "Court Lady Han will decide your punishment. Damaging royal property and tormenting a child—you will face the consequences."
Turning her back on the sniveling pair, Seol-hyang took my hand with gentle care. "Bong-bong. Are you hurt anywhere?"
"No…… I falled, but I'm okay."
"You fell? Let me see."
Seol-hyang hitched up the hem of my skirt, her brow instantly furrowing. I had not even realized it myself, but my knee was badly scraped and bleeding.
"Let's get back to our quarters and put some salve on that."
As I tottered along beside her, the muffled weeping of the two apprentice maids faded into the distance behind us.
Still…… something doesn't add up.
Those two girls were already lingering in the western courtyard long before I arrived. Regular court maids were strictly prohibited from entering that sector, so why would they risk severe punishment just to wander around?
Nothing in this palace happened without a reason. What were they really doing there?
"Bong-bong."
"Yes, hamanim?"
"You must never wander around this side alone again. Understand?"
"Yes, hamanim. I understand."
Seeing the grim tightness around Seol-hyang's mouth only confirmed my suspicions. There was definitely something hidden in the west wing of Chwiseondang.
"Ouch!"
"All done. Bear with it for just a moment."
"……Yes, hamanim."
After applying the herbal ointment, Seol-hyang subjected me to a round of gentle nagging, but my mind was miles away.
I have far too little information.
What state of mind was Jang Hui-bin in right now? What schemes was she cooking up? History had already carved her tragic end in stone: death by royal poison. I desperately needed to pinpoint where we were on that grim timeline.
And who exactly was Hwang Bong-bong?
How did a toddler end up recruited into the inner palace, and what duties awaited her? Could a meaningless, nameless extra like me actually alter the course of history?
"Yaaawn……"
Before I could find any answers, an overwhelming wave of exhaustion crashed over me. Too much had happened in half a day for this fragile four-year-old body to process.
"Aigoo, look at you nodding off already. A baby is still a baby, after all."
Gentle hands caught me as I began to list sideways, guiding me down onto the warm sleeping mat. A soft, soothing hum followed.
"Lullaby, sleep tight, my baby Bong-bong, sleep tight through the night……"
Seol-hyang's lullaby drifted over me like a warm breeze. As consciousness slipped away, an excerpt from the historical annals I had studied in my previous life flashed across my memory.
"Chwiseondang court maids Seol-hyang, Suk-yeong, Suk-jeong, and others were executed by decapitation."
……Seol-hyang. I really hope you don't have to die.
When I finally surfaced from a dreamless slumber, the paper windowpanes were bathed in the pale blue light of dusk. Is this really the time to be lazing around asleep?
Just as I berated myself and moved to sit up, familiar voices reached my ears through the quiet room.
"……I had no idea they would send a child this young. I assumed she would be at least six or seven……"
I was not alone. The speaker was Seol-hyang, and seated beside her was Court Lady Han, the stern woman I had encountered during the jwiburigeullyeo hazing ritual. Realizing they were talking about me, I kept my eyes shut and held my breath, feigning deep sleep.
"She is destined to serve in the inner bedchamber," Court Lady Han replied in her solemn, measured tone. "It is only right to begin her training early, from four or five. Teach her to read step by step, and instruct her thoroughly in palace etiquette."
"Of course, Mama-nim. But how did little Bong-bong end up entering the palace at all?"
"When Her Ladyship is restored to the rank of Queen, this child will attend the Queen herself. We could not entrust such a position to just anyone. While searching discreetly for candidates, word reached me of an abandoned child of noble blood who had nowhere left to go, so I brought her in."
"My goodness…… Bong-bong is from a yangban family?"
Wait, I'm a noble?
"She is, but you must keep that knowledge strictly to yourself."
"Yes, Mama-nim, of course."
Under Joseon dynastic law, noblewomen were forbidden from becoming court maids. Court Lady Han had good reason to keep my lineage under wraps.
"What good is noble blood when she is a helpless orphan with no one to look after her?" Court Lady Han sighed softly. "If not for the charity of a neighbor woman, she would have starved on cold water and thin gruel. Had I not brought her here, she likely would have been sold off to a gisaeng house."
Seol-hyang gasped in horror. "Heavens above…… was a child that small living entirely on her own?"
"Until last year, she had an older brother much her senior living with her, but he vanished without a trace. He spent his days associating with swordsmen and martial artists, so he has surely met his end by now."
"How awful…… Court Lady Han, poor Bong-bong has suffered so much……"
Seol-hyang clicked her tongue in sorrow, followed by a low, weary chuckle from Court Lady Han.
"Ha. Is there a single court maid whose fate is not pitiful? To be locked behind palace walls for a lifetime, withering away in isolation—that is the destiny shared by us all."
"I suppose you're right. Come to think of it, I was only six when I was brought here……"
Seol-hyang's voice sank into bitter reflection.
"……."
I squeezed my eyes shut against the dim room.
The life of this little girl named Hwang Bong-bong had been harsh from the start. Even before crossing the palace threshold, she had already been clawing desperately just to survive. It was a tragic tale, but what struck me like a physical blow was the casual mention of her brother.
Hwang Bong-bong…… had an older brother too.
A dull ache bloomed in my chest. A face I had spent so long trying to bury surfaced unbidden—the face of my brother from my modern life. Just like Bong-bong's brother, my brother had died and left me, an orphan, all alone in the world.
'Live well.'
Those were the words he had left behind.
'You have to live well. Enough for the both of us.'
That was the last time I ever heard his voice.
The Lunar New Year will be here soon.
Spring, the season when I said goodbye to him, was coming around once more. Yet whether in the modern republic I had left behind or in this dynastic Joseon era, my brother was nowhere to be found.
Drip.
A tear slipped past my closed lashes and soaked into the pillow. Echoing from the deepest corner of my heart, his final plea rang out once more.
'You have to live well. Enough for the both of us.'
……I will.
I repeated the promise silently, etching it into my soul.
I'll live well.
No matter how brutal the difficulty setting of this world was, and no matter how limited my power was inside this tiny body, I swore it.
Brother, I'm going to survive this. No matter what it takes.