Burdensome Process
Burdensome Process
'The final victor gets their wish granted, huh...'
The phrase was quite intriguing, but it also left me feeling slightly uneasy.
The exact scope of that promise was never specified.
According to Mirkella, it was "within the bounds of courtesy"... but didn't that just mean the criteria were vague?
It meant the conditions could change at any time depending on her mood.
'Still, there's no way this girl doesn't know that.'
Mirkella might be an airhead, but she wasn't stupid.
So there had to be a reason why she was convinced it would hold true.
"Wooow... it's sweet and deliciousss..."
...At least, I trusted there was one.
Even if she was melting into a stupid expression over a single ice cream right now, surely she had some plan.
"Oh, this is quite a delicacy. It's been so long, the flavor really dances on the tongue."
Similarly, the old man, wolfing down his ice cream in crunchy bites, offered a serene remark.
Well, I could overlook this much.
Since we were cooperating out of mutual necessity, I could afford to provide a snack or two.
The real issue, however, was the foul stench stabbing at my nostrils.
When did he even last wash? The reek of urine was seriously offensive.
'I'm supposed to travel with this old geezer for a while...?'
My head started swimming.
It felt grim trying to figure out how I'd endure the days ahead.
"Hey, old-timer."
I scratched my head as if annoyed and spoke up.
"You entering this tournament means you have a wish to fulfill too... What exactly are you hoping for?"
"Does it matter? We can use each other; isn't that enough?"
Not enough at all.
After all, how could I trust or credit the hidden motives of a shifty old man?
From my end, I absolutely had to know his objective.
Only then could I tell if he had ulterior motives.
"Please tell me. That way we can cooperate with you better."
"Hrm...."
At my pressing, the old man hummed non-committally.
He hesitated briefly, but under my stare, he opened his mouth as if he had no choice.
"Fine. I shall tell you."
The ice cream wrapper in the old man's hand crumpled.
Simultaneously, his eyes filled with a deep, sorrowful longing.
"My granddaughter. I wish to recover my child's daughter."
He looked no different from a vagrant on the street, but the answer was surprisingly wholesome.
A bond connected by blood.
So he held a goal similar to ours.
Well, the feelings on our side were less about tender, wistful sentiments and more like love-hate.
To be more precise, was it to keep my loose mother-in-law's pussy in check?
"That... Gladiator? Or whatever. Can't you just ask the big boss here to find her for you?"
It was Ha Hui-ryeong's question.
She narrowed her eyes in suspicion.
"She could. If I become the victor, she would have no choice but to grant my wish."
"But couldn't she just flip her lid and refuse?"
"No. My wish does not violate her 'criteria.' Therefore, it will surely be realized."
Such certainty.
I had no idea how he could hold such unyielding faith, but aside from his shabby clothes, his eyes were clearly focused on something.
"I'm a bit skeptical. Is this person really that great? I doubt she even has the ability to grant wishes, since she's no genie in a lamp."
Angelica calmly pointed out the sticking point.
It was a valid argument.
How could she claim to know what you'd wish for and grant it?
If she were truly capable, she'd deserve praise.
But if it worked in a twisted, bullshit way like a monkey's paw, then it was just arrogance and fraud.
"She is capable. She is the one closest to God."
"Those are blasphemous words. The one closest to God is our Cult Leader. The one who communes with the Father of Paradise, the seeker of truth who saves all, the Gardener upon the hill—only the Cult Leader of Eden can stand nearest to the heavens."
"Heh. The typical lines of a pseudo-cult."
"Wh-What!?"
Mirkella had been boasting as if reciting a personal boast, and she flared up instantly at the old man's single retort.
It seemed she hadn't let go of her lingering attachments yet.
Even if she was abandoned, she couldn't abandon it herself.
Was that it?
I stared intently at Mirkella before letting out a sigh and looking away.
"Anyway, this place is... surprisingly intact compared to other areas."
The scenery outside the window had preserved its original shape far better than other regions.
Strangely enough, the closer we got to the center, the better the condition was.
"The roads are easier to drive on now too. Do you think they maintain them?"
Kang Ha-rin made a nasal hum as she spoke.
She looked quite pleased because the driving had become smoother.
"Seems like it. We see people occasionally too. Though their look is similar to Old Man's."
As Ha Hui-ryeong said, the people visible outside the window were almost half-dressed, just like the old man.
Even though the weather had thawed, the cold hadn't fully receded yet.
It was just then.
"No, what now─."
-Screech
Suddenly, Kang Ha-rin slammed on the brakes.
I approached the driver's seat to see what the annoyed muttering was about, and a band of half-naked savages was blocking the road.
About three or four of them.
They stood ramrod straight and imposing in the vehicle's path.
"Ugh, are people here insane enough to want to get run over? Why in the world are they acting like that?"
"From the looks of it, they happen to be fighters like myself."
Even I could tell that much at a glance.
After all, their shabby appearance and the bizarre act of blocking a moving car proved they were a peculiar breed.
"I get that, but why does everyone, including you old-timer, do dangerous stuff like this?"
"It's a form of confidence. The ambition of a true man who doesn't care if a mere car rams into him."
"Ambition, my ass. Aren't they just guys who don't know the value of their own lives?"
At the old man's calm reply, Ha Hui-ryeong grumbled in a displeased voice.
I agreed with her.
There's a place for confidence, but this is just foolish bravado.
"I don't get why they flaunt that at a passing car. If they have business, can't they just raise a hand by the roadside?"
"That would make them nothing more than cowards. If they have sworn to throw in their lot with Valhalla, they must prove themselves courageous men, as is proper."
...Valhalla? This is really something.
Have you lot forgotten you're Korean?
"Common sense doesn't apply here. I'm starting to hate this place."
"I agree with you."
Kim Ha-yoon nodded at Angelica's lament.
"Still... um... I think it'd be good to go out first? The eyes of those guys outside have gotten really fierce...."
Jeong Ji-min, who had been quiet until then, carefully raised her hand and offered her opinion.
Then she retreated back to her corner.
It was an odd thing to do.
Perhaps because she found the old man uncomfortable, she had been huddled in the corner covering her nose from the start.
Was she sensitive to smells?
It was unlike her usually bubbly self.
Even a chatterbox like her apparently couldn't handle the old man's horrific stench.
"Yeah, let's get out first."
So we all disembarked.
To be precise, all except for the non-combat personnel.
"Foreigners! Good, good! Very good!"
The moment we revealed ourselves one by one, the group that stopped us cheered with boisterous smiles.
Then each of them gripped their weapons.
A greatsword, a massive war hammer, twin axes.
Every single piece of equipment looked exceptionally menacing.
"And what's more, women optimized for breeding! You stake your life, you gain it all! I, Gladiator fighter Choi Young-ok! I challenge you to an honorable duel!"
The one standing in the center pointed at me and declared in a booming voice.
Having been singled out, I asked incredulously.
"Uh... can I refuse?"
"If you have a justifiable reason, yes. However, if not, accepting it as a real man is the rule here."
How annoyingly troublesome.
I spun my crowbar in circles before snatching it tight.
"Well, fine. Whatever. You dared to covet my fuckhouse, so let's make you pay the price."
"For the record, you must not commit slaughter. Shedding blood is only allowed in duels conducted within the arena, so I urge you to be as careful as possible."
...That was a problem.
With my current abilities, it was almost impossible to hold back.
It might be doable for Ha Hui-ryeong, Angelica, or Kim Ha-yoon, but for me, who wields an instant death skill, it was a somewhat unreasonable request.
Even my Inryeok was basically just a tool for temporarily binding someone without my crowbar.
"Is a substitute possible?"
"Of course. But you should be prepared to be branded a coward."
That much was nothing.
I don't care what others call me, so they can label me whatever they want.
I waved my hand dismissively and turned around.
"I'll just be the coward then. Alright, who wants to brawl in my place?"
Strangely, everyone's reaction was odd.
They exchanged complicated glances with each other.
"Don't people usually step up themselves and tell the others to stay back in times like this?"
"Normally, that's... the standard approach, yes."
"Don't put my husband into a normal category. He is the lowest of low-value men. A resident of the absolute rock bottom of the abyss where there's nowhere left to fall. So I'm not disappointed. If anything, I'm impressed. The mere fact that he knows his place is something."
...She's spouting incredibly rude things without batting an eye.
And Angelica.
I'll remember you.
I'm going to make sure you pay dearly later.
"Seriously, no one? You guys are really going to do this?"
"Hah... Fine, I─."
Just as Ha Hui-ryeong was about to sigh and step forward.
At that very moment, Mirkella, who had been quiet, cut her off and raised her hand high.
"If that's the case, I'll do it! Can I!?"
"Hm... Are you sure?"
"Yes. I was in need of some stress relief anyway, so this is perfect timing. I'll step forward!"
This girl, she's surprisingly combative deep down.
I had a hunch since I heard she had a conflict with Ha Hui-ryeong over positioning...
This lady, she quietly enjoys drawing blood.
"Oh... yeah? Can I trust you with this?"
"Just leave it to me! I'm actually pretty strong, you know?"
I knew that firsthand.
She proved it last time when we clashed in the underground cavern.
That beneath her gentle and mild-mannered impression, she had a flair for combat.
"Okie dokie. Go win, Mir-mir."
"I'm heading out!"
With an awkward expression on my face, I patted her shoulder.
In contrast, Mirkella stepped forward with an excited face like a child on a picnic.
"To put a wench forward as a shield. You're a man without a shred of honor."
"To be this lacking in spirit... your equipment must be pathetic, even without looking."
Their ridicule flew at me.
But I paid it no mind.
Honor and spirit?
As if I'd ever possess such things.
And what?
My equipment?
Heh, a remark too laughable for words.
"Go, Mirmir! Fuck 'em all up!"
"I'm not a Pokémon, you know!?"
That's what she said, but her body was utterly honest.
In time with my command, Mirkella kicked off the ground and surged toward the barbarians.