Universal Vending Machine
Universal Vending Machine
The surface was quieter than I expected.
Thanks to that poor family drawing all the aggro, zombies were a rare sight.
Occasionally, we'd stumble across one in an unexpected spot.
[Uwaaaah...]
Crunch!
Every time, our dear Ha Hui-ryeong's swift and precise bat work cleaned it up in a single blow.
Her reflexes were always astonishing.
Even if one lunged from a blind spot, a fluid, economical swing would pulverize its skull.
'She's seriously reliable.'
From an observer's standpoint, I couldn't help but be impressed by the whole sequence.
That last one practically jumped her with stealth mode on, and she didn't even blink, just dealt with it like it was nothing.
Damn. The ultimate weapon—her.
She was a human weapon incarnate.
'I'll have to pick my moments carefully if I get on her nerves...'
To think I actually fucked a bitch like this.
A sense of depraved satisfaction washed over me, but at the same time, a chill ran down my spine knowing one wrong move could send me straight to the grave.
Not that she'd have the guts to kill me, but she could definitely cripple a guy.
Anyway, after that, things went pretty smoothly.
We moved as stealthily as possible, stifling our footsteps, and before we knew it, we'd reached the underground parking garage safely.
'That it?'
'Yeah.'
I found my car.
A black sedan.
A piece of junk well over a decade old, but thanks to steady maintenance, it still ran fine.
-Nod.
After a silent Bluetooth conversation with our eyes, we opened the car door and shoved the bags into the back seat.
While I did that, she scanned all four directions, keeping watch over the perimeter.
"Hey, it's done. Just get in already."
"Okay."
I called her over, then hurried into the driver's seat and started the engine.
The engine turned over smoothly, and the headlights blazed on.
Let's see, the fuel is... exactly half full.
"Hey, where exactly is Hansarang Apartment? How many minutes away, roughly?"
"Mm... it's a bit far, but by car it's quick."
That was a relief.
I figured I'd just leave the navigation to her.
'Ah, right. Come to think of it, I forgot about that.'
A small, semi-transparent window floated at the edge of my vision.
And the strings of incomprehensible text scrawled across it.
[Trait: Lucky One
_Provides probability correction for equipment enhancement and draws.
Trait: Dark Merchant.
-Find a vending machine. Supplies essential for survival are available.
Special products for the 'Dark Merchant' are added to the vending machine.]
Before heading to Hansarang Apartment, I needed to figure out this bizarre phenomenon first.
'A vending machine. A vending machine, huh...'
As I gently pressed the accelerator, I asked casually,
"Hui-ryeong. Do you happen to know where a vending machine is around here?"
"A vending machine? Why all of a sudden?"
"Just wondering. If you don't know, forget it."
Ha Hui-ryeong gave me a suspicious look.
But only for a moment; she soon gave me the answer I wanted.
"Not sure. I think I remember one in the shopping center across from our convenience store. Not totally certain, though."
"Hmm... well, we'll know when we get there. Thanks anyway."
Even if it wasn't there, I was bound to find one eventually as we drove.
They'd become rarer than before, sure, but you still stumbled across them in the most unexpected places.
There was no rush.
I'd test it out along the way.
With that in mind, I picked up speed and exited the underground parking garage.
But what the hell?
Damn it all, just as I was pulling out of the entrance, an alarm went off.
—Waaaaaaaaah.
Shit. It didn't always register, but the one time it had to, my luck was just rotten.
'...No, I'm supposed to be the Lucky One.'
Lucky One, my ass.
Every second felt like walking on thin ice, so I had no idea how this was supposed to be lucky.
I swallowed my lament and let out a small sigh.
"...Ah, fuck."
"We're fucked, you bitch! Hey, floor it!"
"I was going to even without you telling me."
Even in the middle of this, the bastards' unpleasant screams filtered in constantly from outside the window.
They were reacting to the alarm.
If we didn't get out of here fast, we'd be surrounded in no time.
I floored the pedal and sped up.
[Grrrrrk...!]
"You crazy fuck!"
But right then, one dead ahead.
I spotted it charging at us like a rabid dog.
There was no avoiding this.
"Ah, screw it!!"
—Vrooooom.
If you can't avoid it, enjoy it, motherfucker!
I didn't stop, just accelerated and rammed the bastard head-on.
Bam! The thing collided with the car and went flying from the impact.
And my bumper got fucked up too.
"Uwaaah...! Fuck, more are coming! More are coming, I said!"
"I know, you bitch!"
Drawn by the commotion, the bastards were gathering fast.
I swallowed hard, then wrenched the steering wheel to change course.
Turned right, then gunned it straight ahead!
The roads in the apartment complex were narrow.
So this was a race against time.
Whether I could get out first, or whether they'd reach us first—that was the question.
"Well, a car is faster anyway!"
Luckily, no zombies blocked our path after that.
Some lunged at us at the last second, but I swerved back and forth across the center line and slipped past them smoothly.
"Whoa, whoa! Shit, you're a damn good driver!"
"Yeah? My license is old, but I'm pretty good, right?"
"You've had your license that long?!"
Cold sweat trickled down my back.
To be honest, it had been a year since I last drove.
So I was a little anxious, but I guess I hadn't completely lost my touch, because I got us out of the apartment complex smoothly.
"Whew, they're still following. Persistent bastards."
In the rearview mirror, a few zombies we hadn't shaken off were chasing us.
But as I pushed the speed past 60, even those grew fainter and fewer.
Phew, a moment to catch my breath, at least.
'The problem is... it might be even worse up ahead.'
The closer we got to heavily populated streets, the number of zombies would likely increase exponentially.
The road was wide open now because we were in an area with little foot traffic, but if we went just a bit further, there was a high chance the road would be blocked by zombies.
Heading straight down the main road was the fastest way to our destination, but going in without any plan was far too risky.
We definitely needed to rethink our travel route carefully.
"Hey, Hui-ryeong. I think we need to take a huge detour. Let's head to a quiet spot first, then plan things out more thoroughly. Sound good?"
"...Yeah. Honestly, if you hadn't said that, I was about to."
I expected her to yell at me, asking what kind of bullshit I was spouting and if I wasn't going to save her mom, but she was surprisingly calm.
She gave a nod, showing she agreed.
"And to celebrate surviving, maybe some car sex too."
"...You animal. Don't you ever get tired?"
*
But the situation wasn't as easy as I thought.
We scouted for a place to rest for a while, but with zombies swarming everywhere and overturned cars littering the roads, no suitable spot caught my eye.
In the end, we had no choice but to move in the complete opposite direction of our destination.
"Haaah... I'm so fucking tired."
After a long drive, we arrived at a quiet rest stop off the highway.
The twilight on the horizon had faded, and before we knew it, the world was dyed black.
We'd come too far to move to another location, and it was too late at night.
So we had no choice but to spend the night here.
"Hui-ryeong, you're sure no one's here?"
"Yeah. You saw it too. We searched every corner, and there's no one."
The first thing we did upon arriving was search the interior.
The rest stop's facilities were mostly intact, but it felt totally abandoned; we couldn't sense a single sign of life.
All the lights were on, but the inside was empty.
"Not that there was anything useful, either."
"Seems like everyone cleared it out when they fled."
Rest stops usually have a restaurant and a convenience store attached, so I'd hoped for at least something useful, but sadly, the results were zero.
It had been almost completely looted, no different from an empty ruin.
The only small stroke of luck was that we managed to stock up on fuel.
Thanks to that, we didn't have to worry about running out for a few days.
"Have you gotten in touch with your mom?"
"I called her earlier... She said she's scared but okay. She's staying with the other apartment residents for now."
Ha Hui-ryeong looked a little uneasy as she answered.
She stared up at the night sky with a complicated expression and blew out a cloud of cigarette smoke.
"Hoooh... It's a relief she even picked up. If she hadn't, I really..."
Her voice wavered faintly.
Was she unhappy about the delay? Or was it regret for enjoying that sticky, intimate sex in the car earlier while her mother was in a dangerous situation?
Hard to say.
Maybe it was both. Maybe even worse things were mixed in.
She was pretending to be fine on the surface, but mentally, she was on the back foot.
Still, when it came to offering her gentle comfort, for some reason, my heart wasn't in it.
After all, the relationship between me and her wasn't normal.
Not lovers, not friends—just an ambiguous union of bodies born from aligned interests, a dead end on a hazy extension cord.
Even after sharing intimacy, a deep chasm of old, festering emotions remained between us.
Because a stain always leaves a faint mark, no matter how hard you scrub at it.
In the end, what I offered wasn't really comfort.
"She'll be fine. Your mom's a tenacious one, isn't she? She survived that accident, so how is this any different?"
"You son of a bitch, the way you talk is always so..."
The moment I brought up that 'accident,' Ha Hui-ryeong's eyes narrowed.
The death of my 'father,' and for Ha Hui-ryeong, the day of the incident involving her 'step-father.'
Shockingly, Ha Hui-ryeong's birth mother was there with them at the time.
While they were drinking and out for a drive, only my 'father' met his end; Ha Hui-ryeong's birth mother walked away with minor bruises.
Too ironic to call it a stroke of luck, since she lost her partner... maybe it's what you'd call karma.
"The way I see it, your mouth is your real problem. Didn't you used to get hit two or three extra times back in the day because you couldn't keep it shut?"
"Tragic, isn't it? I thought it was a reasonably witty joke, but apparently, my assigned bully didn't agree."
"In a fucked-up situation, I'm saying fucked-up shit. You think that's funny?"
Snorting, she gave my shoulder a light tap.
Lightly, as if it were just a joke.
A silly little laugh settled on her lips as she faced me.
"But this time, it was a little funny. So I'll let it slide with this."
"You've gotten awfully generous, haven't you."
"What's that supposed to mean. I've always been generous."
Ha Hui-ryeong stretched, looking noticeably lighter.
But only for a moment — she suddenly turned and started heading somewhere.
"Where are you going?"
"Hold on, dumbass. As thanks for your half-assed consolation, noona's gonna go grab you a drink."
At my puzzled reaction, she jingled a wallet pulled from her pocket.
"A drink? We've got some in the car."
"We should save what's in the car as much as possible, right? It's fine, I'll get one from the vending machine."
Wait, a vending machine? There was one here? When I'd scoped out the whole interior earlier, I hadn't spotted anything like that at all.
My eyes went wide, and she tilted her head with a quizzical expression, as if thinking, 'Why's this bastard suddenly acting like this?'
"There's one over by the smoking area."
"Oh shit, you should've said that sooner."
"Wh-what's with you all of a sudden?"
I scrambled after her, and Ha Hui-ryeong eyed me suspiciously.
"Earlier you were going on about vending machines too — what the hell is this about?"
"I just need to check something. It's nothing."
"Stop bullshitting me and tell me straight. Why are you suddenly acting like a dog that needs to take a shit?"
What a way to put it.
I stared at her through narrowed eyes, then let out a weary sigh.
I didn't deliberate long.
Fine. I'll tell her.
We're traveling together now, and secrets we can't share with each other are no different from seeds of discord.
"Actually... there is something. But it's not a big deal, seriously. It's really nothing."
"I'll be the judge of that, not you. So spill it all honestly, without leaving out a single detail."
Her tone dripped with mischief, but her eyes were icily cold, as if warning that any lie wouldn't be tolerated.
If I tried to beat around the bush here, I definitely wouldn't escape unscathed.
I cleared my throat with a short cough and opened my mouth with some difficulty.
"Remember? When we beat that parasite-looking bastard to death. Ever since then, things have been looking... off. Hey, don't make that face — I'm not crazy. I'm serious, I can literally see something like a game status window. It's always floating in the corner of my vision, and if I double-click it, it even expands."
"Ohhh... is that so."
"I gave it to you straight and you still don't believe me. I worked up the nerve to say all that."
"Well... fine. Let's just go with that for now. So what about the vending machine? What does that have to do with it?"
But despite me mustering the courage to lay everything out, her reaction was nothing more than indifferent.
...Honestly, what a rude brat.
"It's connected to what I think is my trait. It seems to sell survival-related stuff."
"A trait even? Wow, you've really built yourself quite the fantasy setting."
"...Fine, don't believe me. I'm not sure either, that's why I'm going to check."
When I shot back in a sulky voice, she flashed a sly grin and poked me in the side.
"Are you pouting? Hey, you're seriously pouting over this?"
"I'm not pouting, you bitch."
"Oh no, what do I do. When our statue gets upset, it lasts forever... Oh, I know — want to suck on noona's tits? No milk comes out, but our statue likes boobs, doesn't he?"
...This damn woman.
Watching her push her chest at me while running her mouth, both lust and fury surged up at once.
But I forced those feelings deep down and feigned composure.
Getting angry here means I lose.
She'd just get even more hyped and keep running her mouth.
"Forget it. Right now, checking this out comes first."
"Turning this down? He really is upset. This is serious."
"I said I'm not upset."
After a bit more frivolous banter, we soon reached the smoking area and stood there staring blankly at the vending machine.
How should I put it — it didn't exactly give off a particularly special vibe.
"So this piece of scrap metal is better than noona's tits, is that it?"
"You've been going on with 'noona, noona' — so damn noisy. Was that kind of play always your thing?"
"...A little bit."
...So she says.
At least I'll keep that in mind for next time.
Anyway.
'But still, this thing... there's nothing particularly distinctive about it, is there?'
I'd searched for the vending machine with high hopes, but what I actually found was just an ordinary drink vending machine no matter how I looked at it.
The kind you can see anywhere.
"Haah... figured as much."
High hopes lead to crushing disappointment.
A low sigh escaped me on its own.
"Damn it."
In my frustration, I kicked it without thinking, and Bang! — the vending machine shuddered from the impact.
That exact moment.
'Huh?'
The space around the vending machine wavered.
Colorful square pixels rose from the floor and in an instant enveloped the vending machine, then overlaid its interior with completely new items.
Ding!
{User 'Dark Merchant' recognized. Vending machine products are now available.}
※Random Attribute Enchant Scroll (Success rate 0.7%) — 20 coins.
Crossbow (Pickup rate 1%) — 100 coins. Steel Arrow — 1 coin.
※Stamina Enhancer (Permanent) — 5 coins.
Gasoline or Diesel 1L — 10 coins.
Water 1L — 1 coin. Pork belly 1kg — 2 coins.
...What the hell is this bullshit?
I stared at the transformed vending machine with my eyes wide open.
Maybe my bewilderment showed plainly on my face — Ha Hui-ryeong, beside me, tugged at my collar and voiced her confusion.
"What? Why are you acting weird again?"
"No — you can't see this?"
"What kind of nonsense are you on about now? See what? It's just a vending machine."
No way.
So it really was only visible to my eyes.
I cheered inwardly.
Yes, this is it! It's got to be at least this much to call it a blessing!
"What, what is it?"
I left Ha Hui-ryeong tilting her head as if she had no idea what was going on and approached the vending machine.
And after briefly browsing the products, I picked one at random and pressed it firmly.
A moment later.
[Payment complete. 20 coins consumed.]
A notification window appeared, and with a mechanical rumbling sound, something dropped out of the vending machine.
I took the item without hesitation.
"Paper...?"
Compared to the grandiose sound effect, the result was nothing more than a single piece of aged parchment.
And it was covered in bizarre symbols as if someone had scribbled all over it.
'A scroll, was it called?'
Do I just... rub it on a weapon or something?
While I was wrestling with the parchment, Ha Hui-ryeong, who had been intently watching all of this, poked me in the side.
"Hey, what's that? Why did that come out of a vending machine?"
"I told you earlier. I think I've gotten some kind of weird ability."
"That... was real? You didn't make it up?"
I understood.
In all honesty, she'd been half-doubting, and now that things actually turned out like this, she was understandably flustered.
"I said I didn't make it up, didn't I? Anyway, give me that bat for a sec."
"Why? What for?"
"This paper — if you think of it like a game, it seems like an enhancement scroll. Let's test it out."
"...Why does it have to be mine? Can't you use yours?"
Ha Hui-ryeong hugged her bat like it was her own child, eyeing me with suspicion.
She had a point.
I had my crowbar right there; I could use that as the test subject.
But thinking in terms of game systems, I had to account for the possibility of enhancement failure.
If it failed, normally that meant 'breakage,' didn't it?
I treasured my belongings fiercely.
Even when it was something you could find anywhere.
"It'll be over quick. It's just rubbing some paper on it — what could possibly go wrong?"
"...If it breaks, I'm wringing you dry all day."
"Then I'd actually welcome it."
She still looked uneasy, but in the end, she handed over her main weapon.
I took it with a grin and immediately rubbed the scroll on it — swish, swish.
And then something astonishing happened.
"Huh..."
The paper literally seeped into the bat.
The scroll grew soggy and damp like it had soaked up water, then dissolved in an instant, vanishing completely without a trace.
And immediately after.
—
[Scroll use confirmed. Please wait a moment.]
1...2...
[Activating trait 'Lucky One.' Enhancement probability adjusted. 0.7%▷70%]
3....4... Ding!
[Enchant successful! The spirit of lightning has been imbued into the equipment 'Bat.']
....
—
Notification windows popped up in rapid succession.
The claim about boosting enhancement probability seemed to be true — the enhancement succeeded in one try.
Confirming this, I swung the bat through the air, and it somehow seemed to have a nicer luster to it.
—Crackle!
Along its trajectory, blue sparks scattered noisily.
"What."
...This actually works?
I stood frozen, too shocked to move, while Ha Hui-ryeong, her expression even more astonished than mine, snatched the bat away.
"Give it, let me see it!"
She swung it a few times, then met my eyes.
A dry gulp traveled down her throat.
"Do you... have any others?"
"Of course I do. Stamina enhancers, fuel, and various things to eat as well."
"Fuck the stamina stuff. So what kind of food is there?"
"Let's see. Pork belly, beer, buttered peanuts... roughly these."
"Pork belly...? No bullshit, for real?"
"Yeah. What would I gain from bullshitting you?"
Ha Hui-ryeong's ears perked up at the word 'pork belly.'
As a test, I firmly pressed the button labeled 'Pork belly.'
Rumble, thunk.
And just like before, the vending machine spat out a vacuum-sealed pack of pork belly.
Was that really all it took?
I only held that thought for a moment — suddenly, her eyes took on a meaningful glint as she approached me.
"What. No — what is it? Say something, dammit!"
I backed away step by step, but she gave no answer and simply drew closer.
The distance shrank, and when there was nowhere left to retreat.
"Fuck. Take it out. Your cock. Right now!"
She abruptly tossed her bat aside and threw her arms around me tightly.