Chapter 70
Chapter 70
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Translator: crow
Chapter Title: Reverse Quest Ticket Dispenser
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All manuals for entities are written through experimentation.
Thus, I too began experimenting with the "Reverse Quest Ticket Dispenser".
[Reward: One Can of Zero Cola]
[Mission: 20 Squats]
[Deadline: 10 Minutes]
Once I finished 20 squats, a 355ml can of Zero Cola had already appeared on the desk.
"Easy."
I entered the same conditions once more.
[Reward: One Can of Zero Cola]
[Mission: 60-Second Plank (Without Breaking)]
[Deadline: 10 Minutes]
This time, the mission was different. I went to another room in the office and finished the plank, and right before my eyes, a can of Zero Cola appeared.
"Even for the same reward, the mission is randomly selected from those of equivalent difficulty, and the reward appears in a nearby, safe location based on my position."
Next, I drew two tickets in a row.
"Tickets can be drawn consecutively."
[Reward: Rain for the Next 1 Hour]
[Mission: Place a 2L Bottled Water 20 Meters Away, Then Knock It Over with a Golf Ball]
[Deadline: 13 Hours]
[Reward: Clear Weather All Day Today]
[Mission: Handstand for 10 Minutes]
[Deadline: 13 Hours]
I signed the rain ticket first, then tried signing the clear weather ticket right after. But as if the ink had run out, the pen wouldn't write each time I tried to sign, and even stamping my fingerprint didn't work.
"You can't accept two missions at once."
I went outside, set up the bottled water, brought a golf ball, and hit the bottle from 20 meters away. The moment it fell over, the sky darkened.
"I can easily change the weather to that extent."
It was early January's cold weather, so it should have snowed, but the weather suddenly warmed up, causing rain to pour instead of snow.
"Whoa! What the hell? Rain all of a sudden in this weather!?"
"Ugh! What kind of bolt from the blue is this!"
I silently apologized to the passersby, returned to the office, and signed the clear weather ticket, which now worked normally. I completed its mission.
'It stopped.'
This confirmed one more fact.
"Ticket wishes can be overwritten by other ticket wishes."
In other words, the reward from a completed ticket can be nullified by another ticket's reward.
"Also, as mentioned, the mission difficulty is based on an absolute standard."
Both missions were too easy for me. But for ordinary people, they would definitely be difficult, meaning the standard is based on average humans, not the person inputting the reward.
"Alright, I've figured out the basics..."
I cracked my knuckles.
"Now, let's investigate the mission difficulties and details for rewards."
'First, since customers will come for New Year's resolutions, let's draw tickets related to that.'
I searched online for New Year's resolution rankings and drew tickets.
[Reward: Healthy Weight Loss to Normal Range]
[Mission: Volunteer at an Orphanage Every Day During Mission Period]
[Deadline: 180 Days]
[Reward: Complete Quitting of Currently Smoked Cigarettes]
[Mission: Climb to the Summit of Hallasan Every Day During Mission Period]
[Deadline: 365 Days]
[Reward: Knowledge to Obtain Tax Accountant Certification]
[Mission: No Refined Carbohydrates During Mission Period]
[Deadline: 365 Days]
For rewards that ordinary humans could achieve with strong willpower, the missions were similarly things doable with strong willpower.
'Now, let's try a big reward.'
I inputted rewards that required willpower but also talent.
[Reward: Native-Level English Proficiency]
[Mission: Reach Challenger Rank 1-20 in League of Legends Solo Queue with Pure Skill]
[Deadline: 365 Days]
[Reward: Happy Romance with Ideal Opposite-Sex Partner]
[Mission: Shout the N-Word 10 Times at 75+ Decibels in Front of 20+ Strangers in Harlem, New York]
[Deadline: 60 Days]
[Reward: Employment at a Major Corporation]
[Mission: Achieve Pure Quadruple Straight Flush Hand in Online or Offline 4-Player Mahjong Without Cheating]
[Deadline: 365 Days]
There were many missions that were possible but required talent, risked one's life, or were impossible without luck.
"I can feel the intent: no free rides."
However, by precisely adjusting the reward's scope, I could lower the difficulty a bit.
[Reward: English Proficiency of a 3-Year American Immigrant Blending In]
[Mission: Reach Master Rank in League of Legends Solo Queue with Pure Skill]
[Deadline: 60 Days]
[Reward: Ordinary Romance with Ordinary Opposite-Sex Partner]
[Mission: Shout the N-Word Once at 65+ Decibels in Front of 20+ Strangers in Harlem, New York]
[Deadline: 100 Days]
[Reward: Employment at Korean Company Ranked 100-150]
[Mission: Achieve Big Three Dragons in Online or Offline 4-Player Mahjong Without Cheating]
[Deadline: 100 Days]
I confirmed that the narrower and more precise the reward's size and scope—away from vague wishes—the more noticeably the mission difficulty dropped.
'It might be my imagination, but similar-feeling missions came up consecutively.'
Since entities often have egos even as inanimate objects, maybe they sometimes give similar missions.
"I've grasped the general quirks."
Finally, I checked one more thing.
[Reward: One Can of Zero Cola]
[Mission: 30 Sit-Ups]
[Deadline: 10 Minutes]
I signed it, then waited for the deadline to pass.
The moment 10 minutes elapsed, a clear image flashed in my mind.
[Mission Failed]
[Penalty Activated]
[Your Penalty: "Feel Like Meat Is Stuck Between Your Molars for 10 Minutes."]
A sensation of meat stuck between my molars hit me.
After 10 minutes, it vanished as if it had never been there.
"Not a big deal for a penalty, and the reward wasn't either."
What kind of penalty would come for failing a big reward?
'No wonder it mentioned risks to life or quality of life.'
Not using the "Reverse Quest Ticket Dispenser" isn't an option.
"Humans always use technology for convenience, and technology always comes with risks."
Minimizing those is the expert's job—and my mission.
"Alright, then..."
I opened the office door.
"Shall we start the fixer business?"
"Huh? You can quit smoking with that?"
Naturally, customers didn't believe me at first.
"Yes."
"No, that makes sense... I guess? As a fixer, you might have something like that."
The perception shift from my profession as a fixer resolved it.
"Reward is quitting smoking, mission is climbing Hallasan? For a year? Uh, Mr. Fixer? Anything quicker instead of something that takes so long?"
"Here. Same reward, but different mission, so you can still get what you want."
"Oh, thank you! Let's see... Mission is... Shout 'Dokdo Is Japanese Land' 50 Times in Gwanghwamun Square!?"
As expected, most customers were those wanting to achieve New Year's resolutions.
I satisfied them with pre-drawn tickets featuring missions that were easy to do nearby and seemed low difficulty.
"Catch 30 Black Sea Bream in Open Ocean Within a Month? Oh, easy! This gets me to normal weight—total steal!?"
"Tsk, so walking 200,000 steps every day for a year gives knowledge to get into Seoul National University? This seems the easiest, so I'll take it."
"So, happy romance with my ideal type means personally plucking 100,000 hairs from severely balding people? I'll do it—don't stop me! Starting today, I'll be the nightmare of the bald!"
Most people left satisfied.
Or, upon seeing the difficulty, they'd think, 'This isn't much different from just trying myself,' and leave without taking a ticket.
"Um, I heard from a friend that you have tickets that grant wishes."
Then, customers revealing pure personal desires unrelated to resolutions started showing up.
"I want to make money! 10 billion won!"
I didn't turn away such rewards and issued tickets.
[Reward: 10 Billion Won Without Tax Issues]
[Mission: Kill 500 Mexican Cartel Members Using Only Personal Power, No Government Help]
[Deadline: 365 Days]
Big rewards naturally came with life-risking or hard-to-achieve missions.
[Reward: 100 Million Won Without Tax Issues]
[Mission: Moderate Top 1-20 Minor Galleries on Hwingael for 1+ Year (Failure if Fired Midway or Hate Images Left Up 3+ Minutes)]
[Deadline: 365 Days]
[Reward: Healthy Body That Never Gains Weight or Gets Sick No Matter What You Eat]
[Mission: Defeat Adult Grizzly Bear in Bare-Handed Fight]
[Deadline: 80 Days]
[Reward: Olympic Gold Medalist-Level Physical Ability in All Sports]
[Mission: Take a Proof Shot with Kim Jong-un in Pyongyang]
[Deadline: 365 Days]
When such rewards were unrealistic, the missions were similarly unrealistic.
[Reward: Telekinesis to Easily Lift H-Beams]
[Mission: Complete 10,000 Base Jumping Wingsuit Flights]
[Deadline: 20,000 Days]
[Reward: Superpower to Create Desired Lifeforms]
[Mission: Prove the Riemann Hypothesis]
[Deadline: 365 Days]
[Reward: Immortality]
[Mission: Win Rock-Paper-Scissors Against Unmanipulated Ordinary Mirror]
[Deadline: 7 Days]
Of course, I didn't hand these directly to customers.
"You need to think carefully. Failing a ticket's mission imposes a penalty matching the reward. I'll give you 3 days to decide, then you can commit."
I gave them ample time for objective self-assessment on whether they could handle the mission.
"Yeah, I'll pass."
"It was just a whim. I've lived fine without it—no need to risk my life."
Most changed their minds during the hold period or never returned.
"I'll give it a shot."
But some still challenged it.
"I thought about the mirror rock-paper-scissors one. What if I just extend faster? Or fake scissors and switch to rock? I win then. Since mirrors reflect light, if I'm just a bit faster than light..."
"Do you know the speed of light?"
"I do, but light has a fixed speed. If I'm even a fraction of a second faster—like a comma second—I can win. I want to try."
These people had already decided the outcome, so explanations didn't sway them.
"Here then. Once more: failure imposes a matching penalty."
"Yes! Thank you!"
A few days later, some customers returned.
"Ugh! The penalty! Save me!"
All had failed their missions and received penalties.
"I can't taste anything! No sense of taste for a month—please fix this!"
"I can't control my sphincter! Sob sob! Poop leaks anytime!"
"Every time I come to, I've sent hate images to friends on KakaoTalk without realizing! Dozens have cut me off, and some threaten lawsuits!"
Penalties were brutal, worse for bigger rewards.
"It'sh deing my fwood! Pwease hewp! I shwear!"
"Penalty makes all food taste like shit. Please, I just want to eat."
"Waaah! Penalty of 8 impacted wisdom teeth! Can't even get surgery yet 'cause it hits nerves!"
Some were temporary, others permanent, but I couldn't help any.
'Amazing—no one's blaming me despite these penalties.'
Maybe because I'm a fixer.
Or perhaps the tickets have quirks I haven't grasped yet.
"Either way, helping people feels good."
With moderate greed, anyone can seize their desires via tickets.
Even excessive greed is fine. I'll give think time; the choice is theirs.
'And human potential is limitless—someone might achieve the impossible and claim an unattainable reward.'
I won't block human potential.
"Welcome. Here for a ticket?"
So today, I welcome customers.
"What reward do you desire?"