325. Doubt
325. Doubt
***
Lately, the more Serin looked at her viewer count, the less real it felt.
And now, just before ending the stream.
Even so, the number of people currently watching was approaching 40,000.
'That seems like way more than I expected.'
She had expected success as a streamer. But she had a small doubt about whether her streams were really worth this many people watching.
I had just done my stream as usual, and along the way I'd spent time with special people like Sua and Eunha.
But thanks to the people she'd gotten to know that way, the number of viewers had grown this much before she knew it.
She was only now vaguely feeling that fact.
"Thank you for watching again today. Then, I'll see everyone tomorrow."
As she gave her stream-ending message, the chat expressed its disappointment, but she moved the mouse without hesitation.
Click.
The chat window, which had been flooded with countless messages, instantly turned gray and no more chat appeared, and the stream screen likewise showed only the message announcing the end of the broadcast.
Once the stream ended, she let out a small breath.
"Really... it doesn't feel real."
She muttered it offhandedly while habitually sweeping back her hair. The sensation of her ever-soft hair brushing her fingertips lasted only a moment before she laced her fingers together and stretched upward.
While stretching lightly, she looked back on today's stream.
The time spent in Another World with Sua and Yujeong, coordinating with the two of them, had been enjoyable and quite satisfying, and the stream's ending had gone well too.
But still, sitting in one place for so long left her body feeling stiff.
'Still, they say humans are creatures of adaptation.'
Back in Black Ark, she had hated staying still in one spot, yet now she was living a completely opposite life and was satisfied with it.
For some reason, I found that version of myself fascinating.
Knock knock!
At the sound of knocking that came right on cue, I knew who it was, and a faint smile slipped out before I knew it.
That was one of the changes that had appeared in her daily life, and from now on things would be a little different.
"You can come in."
When she spoke, the door slowly opened and Seoyun came into view.
Seoyun, with her small frame that might or might not reach 160cm, wearing an apron, looked both quite fitting and cute.
"Serin. Your stream's over, right?"
"You knocked even though you already knew, didn't you?"
Seoyun asking when she obviously knew made her laugh for no reason.
"Still, I asked just in case. If you're all done, let's eat fruit together in the living room."
As she said that, she naturally came over and took Serin's arm to lead her, and Serin pretended to be dragged along as she got up.
Clunk.
With the sound of the door closing, I saw the fruit laid out on the living room table.
Kiwi, apple, pear, and various other fruits were beautifully plated. She found herself thinking that even the way the fruit was cut was really pretty.
As she settled naturally at the table, Seoyun smiled brightly and held out a fork with fruit on it.
"Serin, you worked hard streaming again today."
She even playfully added words of appreciation, and the sight of Seoyun saying that was funny for some reason.
"What, are you being a supportive wife or something?"
She asked while taking a bite of the offered apple. You could say Seoyun knew how to be loved. At times like this, Seoyun's behavior seemed truly ideal.
Her outward appearance was endlessly cute, and even in a single action, her consideration showed.
"Supportive wife, what... Serin, the things you say. I just felt like I should do this. Still, you're working, aren't you?"
Seoyun laughed softly as if what I'd said was funny, and I carefully brought something up.
"Still, staying at home like this must be pretty boring. Isn't watching my stream not that fun?"
I'd said Seoyun would stay at my place for the whole vacation, but in truth, all the friends she'd known were far away.
Even her best friend Chaerin was still in the dormitory, I'd heard. On weekends it might be different, but on weekdays, I didn't have much time to pay attention to Seoyun because I was preparing business-related things or stream content.
Before the stream, they'd somehow managed to talk and spend time together, but here in Gangnam, there weren't many people Seoyun could call connections.
Would she get lonely? That was what bothered Serin.
Even under my gaze, Seoyun shook her head and burst into laughter.
"Really, Serin... what am I, a kid? And watching your stream is more fun than I expected. With just a door between us, thinking that you're streaming, isn't it fascinating even while watching? Watching the chat reactions is fun too. And actually, I even typed in chat, but you don't know."
She said it casually while taking a dainty bite of kiwi, and I stared at her blankly before blinking.
I knew Seoyun watched my streams, but.
"You. You typed in chat too?"
"Yeah. I get why viewers type in chat now. It was fun typing in chat the whole stream."
"What was your nickname?"
She asked out of curiosity while bringing a slice of pear to her mouth.
"You're curious?"
Seoyun made a peculiar expression and said it with feigned coyness, and Serin nodded. At that, Seoyun seemed to hesitate for a moment before shaking her head.
"Hmm... no. I won't tell you. If I tell you my nickname, it feels like it won't be fun anymore. And if I tell you, you'll just pay attention to my chat."
She laughed and said it playfully, and seeing that, Serin laughed along with her and felt like teasing her for no reason.
"What. Seoyun, you didn't type weird stuff in chat about Yujeong, did you?"
"Yujeong... ah, Serin, you mean that woman called Bloody Night or whatever?"
"Yeah. The person I did the collab with today."
When she said it casually, Seoyun stopped mid-motion bringing a slice of persimmon to her mouth and her expression clouded.
"Serin, seriously, why would I type weird stuff? And today during the stream, viewers kept talking about that person, so it was a bit worse than usual for me."
Then her expression darkened. Today's stream chat had apparently felt a bit unpleasant to Seoyun as well.
'Well, sure.'
Yujeong's extraordinary appearance was one thing, but because of her peculiar alluring atmosphere, the chat had been a bit chaotic throughout the stream.
Looking at the recently surging viewer count, she'd wondered if she should hire a separate manager to handle the chat, but her current schedule left no room to find someone.
"Right. But the whole time I was watching, viewers kept trying to pair you with that Yujeong person. Is that, like, a We Got Married thing or something?"
When Seoyun asked as if genuinely curious, I couldn't help but burst out laughing.
"No, what We Got Married. They're all just joke chats. Seoyun, were you taking those chats seriously while watching?"
"No, not that, but... honestly, that Yujeong person. Every time she dealt with you, her actions and words seemed a bit strange. So I wondered if it was just an act for the stream."
As Seoyun continued, sounding like she found it a little odd, I found myself looking at her again.
Honestly, throughout our coordination, I'd felt the same thing from Yujeong and wondered if it was just my imagination. But Seoyun was saying that even from her perspective, she'd sensed something peculiar in Yujeong's behavior.
"I thought Yujeong was just acting that way as a joke."
When she said that without thinking, Seoyun let out a faint sigh.
"Honestly, I still don't really know about that person. Sometimes it seems like she's just teasing you, sometimes not... and Another World is a game, so... she only knows you as a character. Ah, you're not actually acquainted with that Yujeong person in real life or anything, right?"
"We're not like that. We've never met in person."
As she answered, the feeling was strange. It felt like she was overthinking it, and since the topic she and Seoyun were discussing was what it was, the situation was a little awkward.
It was as if we were confirming that Yujeong actually liked me—that she held some kind of feeling for me, someone she'd only seen as a character.
At that thought, a small laugh slipped out of me.
'There's no way.'
Most importantly, Yujeong and I had never even met in real life.
No matter how realistic Another World was, no matter how much it gave the feeling of facing each other directly, just as I didn't know Yujeong's real appearance, Yujeong couldn't possibly know mine either.
So how could she hold some strange feeling?
"If that's the case, Serin... I guess I was just overthinking it."
Had Seoyun felt it too? When she laughed awkwardly and tried to change the subject, I went along with it, moving to another topic of conversation.
"Yeah. She probably just has a favorable impression of the character Rin."
While exchanging various words with Seoyun like that, I slowly finished my thoughts.
If they had been a man and a woman, she might have considered even the slightest possibility. But since that wasn't the case, thinking deeply about it at all felt foolish.
Then suddenly, she found herself thinking about the environment of this world.
An era that was open-minded and respectful of various individual thoughts.
2031.
'Come on. Still... there's no way.'
When she'd briefly looked into the user Bloody Night before, she hadn't seen anything about her orientation either.
So she dismissed it as her own groundless worry and let it go.
Without knowing how that thought would change the next day.
***
September 7th, Tuesday.
The Five Million Project. It was the day of the raid against Zervallua, Beast of Destruction.
The agreed raid time was 4 PM, as if Sua had matched it to Serin's stream schedule, and the meeting place had been agreed upon as the raid entrance, the 'Gorge of Estrangement.'
3:51 PM.
"The September 7th Tuesday stream has started."
Serin, connected to Another World, had turned on her stream earlier than usual. She announced the start of the stream with her customary greeting.
Whooosh!
As Arianat flew swiftly toward the meeting place, the fierce wind sent her hair flying wildly, and she slowly swept back her hair while checking the chat window at the edge of her vision.
[Rin haaaaaa]
[What, you're early today?]
[lololol what about the people just now coming into the stream]
[Rin's visuals are insane again today]
[You're streaming the whole raid today too, right!?]
[What's with Another World right from the start]
[Where are you going now?]
[Why is Rin so pretty even with her hair blowing in the wind]
[Rin ha!]
[Thinking about the raid location, she's probably going to the gorge]
Looking at the varied chat messages, Serin slowly parted her lips.
"That's right, I'm going to the Gorge of Estrangement. And as I mentioned beforehand, from the part where we face Zervallua, you'll be able to check it through NewTube."
As she explained in response to the chat from viewers who'd come to watch, now that the raid day had actually arrived, her mood felt a little subdued.
Zervallua, Beast of Destruction.
It would be very different from the past, but still, it was a demonic beast that had made her feel many things.