For Real
So this was what it felt like to wear someone else's underwear.
Out of all the feelings too many to name, it was as if only shame had been pumped full of air and left to swell… that kind of feeling. And because the size didn't quite fit my body, it was worse still. The pants I'd borrowed along with them were at least all right—soft gray joggers that stretched as far as they needed to—but the panties…
Well.
They rode up a little between my cheeks, so I kept having to reach back and tug them free with my fingers.
"……."
Forget it. That wasn't what mattered right now.
What mattered was that I'd come in front of Seo Woojin and Yozora, tail shivering, from nothing more than having my ears touched a little. How were they going to look at me after that? Obviously as some filthy pervert who'd soaked her leggings at a friend's house. And then talking the way we used to, easy and natural, was going to get a lot harder…
Aaaah.
I just wanted to die. I wanted everything that happened today struck from the record and myself sent back a day—no, even half a day would do. Mom…
"Uuuu…."
Alone in the bedroom, I'd been kicking Yozora's blanket as hard as I could, and when that still wasn't nearly enough I wrapped myself up in it and started rolling back and forth across the bed. But no matter how hard I tried to force the memory out, every time the washing machine hummed away in the distance the whole thing came rushing back and my breath locked in my throat.
Haaaa…
How had I ended up showing my lion ears and tail, and letting Yozora touch them until I came and came…
…Wait.
In the middle of rolling around in shame, a single thin beam of light cut through my head. I squirmed upright and sat properly. Going back over what had just happened, piece by piece… something was off.
Getting a paizuri lesson from Yozora, supposedly so I could make friends, wasn't all that strange on its own. What was strange was smelling Seo Woojin's cum and having my ears and tail come out before I even knew it. And then Yozora suddenly coming over and touching my ears, over and over, until I came again and again. The more I thought about it, the more suspicious the whole thing got.
Right. Now that I thought about it, she'd said something while she was touching my ears. Something along the lines of variant-types are all the same, after all. Did that mean Yozora got like this too if someone touched her succubus horns and tail?
Fine, set that aside. What about the part where I had my tail stuck straight up in the air and she still kept touching me until my panties were soaked through?
…Was she a lesbian?
No, no. She had a boyfriend. It probably wasn't that.
"……."
Then what was it? Had she just been too drunk to stop where she should have, and gone overboard? For a moment the stock excuse I kept seeing on the news floated up—I was drunk, that's why.
Knock, knock.
Someone was at the door.
"…Who…?"
"…Ah. You feeling a little better?"
The gentle voice asking was a man's, one I'd grown more used to hearing than my own father's, whom I only saw now and then. It was Seo Woojin.
…Now that I thought about it, it was only ever going to be him or Yozora, so asking who it was might have been a little strange.
Flustered, I clutched the blanket tight and went on.
"I-I'm okay now…."
"Mind if I come in for a second, then?"
"…Yeah."
I hesitated about a second before answering. The latch clicked, the door that had been shut tight opened halfway, and Seo Woojin stepped in.
…He looked bigger than usual, somehow. Was that because I'd been kneeling between his legs earlier?
Anyway, I'd already let him into a bedroom once before, so it wasn't especially awkward. This was Yozora's room, besides. There wasn't anything here I'd be ashamed to be caught with.
…Of course, my ears and cheeks were still burning from what had just happened, and there was nothing I could do about that.
"This was in Yozora's fridge. Want some?"
"…What is it?"
"Orange juice. I don't really know the brand, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty expensive."
"…Give it. I'll drink it."
Only after the words were out did I realize give it had come out a little blunt. Next time I'd say could you give it to me—
No. No, that was formal speech.
…Hmm. He was the infirmary teacher, though. Using that much politeness now and then… might be fine.
"…Hey. Where's Yozora? You just left her and came by yourself?"
"She passed out. On the sofa over there. See her?"
"Hang on…. Ah. I see her."
I'd asked before touching the juice he'd handed me, and Seo Woojin eased the door he'd been about to shut open again. I squirmed over, tilted my head, and there she was in the distance—Yozora, limp, both soles planted on the sofa's armrest. Her chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm. Her arms weren't resting on her stomach; they hung loose toward the floor. She really was asleep.
Well, she'd looked exhausted even standing in front of the washing machine.
…Still. After doing that to me, she got to sleep like she didn't have a care in the world. I was a little annoyed.
"Mmm…. Hey."
"…Yeah?"
"…You okay? Earlier. Your… ears. Yozora touching them without asking."
Had he read my mind? Or was the displeasure just written all over my face? Sitting comfortably at the bedside, Seo Woojin put on a sorry look in Yozora's place—not naming it outright, only turning the subject a fraction, just enough that I understood at once.
"…I don't really care."
Watching him like this, I couldn't begin to understand why Yozora called Seo Woojin Master. Shouldn't it have been the other way around? The part of a willful master suited drunk Yozora perfectly. She'd been a tyrant, plain and simple—a tyrant who kept kneading my ears even when she was told to stop. How had it ended up reversed? Was there some story I still didn't know?
Hmm…
"…Instead, forget it. Forget it somehow. Everything you saw earlier. All of it."
"I'll try."
"If you don't, I'll hit you on the head until you do…."
"…Coming from you, that sounds like you mean you'll kill me."
"You can heal anyway. Wounds and stuff."
"So you'll only hit me enough that I don't die?"
"…If I have to."
I knew how impossible what I was asking was. If it had been me, I wouldn't have forgotten it for the rest of my life—Seo Woojin pressing Yozora's head down and pumping cum into her mouth, spurt after spurt. And he'd seen me the same way: ears and tail out, panting in my leggings, soaking the floor beneath me.
Haaaa…
Yes, that's right. I'm actually a sprinkler who squirts love juice the moment anyone so much as touches the animal ears on my head. Touching my tail would probably do the exact same thing. I'd really rather not test that, though.
I scolded myself a few times in my head, then carefully took a sip of the orange juice Seo Woojin had given me.
"……?"
He'd said it was expensive, so I'd expected something, but it wasn't especially good. The finish was the problem. It tasted like ordinary sweet orange juice all the way through, and then right at the end there was a faint chemical note. I was pretty sure I could have grabbed any orange juice off a supermarket shelf and gotten something at least this good. Either way, it didn't seem worth the money. Maybe Woojin just had it wrong. Or maybe I simply didn't know enough about orange juice to taste the difference.
Not that it mattered, so long as it was decent. I watched Seo Woojin smile, soft and easy, and took a few more sips. The longer I drank, the more that strange aftertaste started to feel like part of the charm.
"All right. Then as far as today's concerned, nothing happened. Looking at Yozora, she's probably going to black the whole thing out anyway."
"…You say one word about this anywhere…."
He answered with a bright, refreshing smile, as if to say he had no plans to kill himself just yet. I looked at his face and swallowed the orange juice, gulp after gulp. For a moment he just stared at the cup in my hands. Then, as if something had occurred to him, he let out a small ah.
"Then maybe I should get as drunk as Yozora. I might black out too."
"…You think it's that easy?"
It was absurd enough that I laughed before I meant to.
"Who knows. It'll probably be pretty hard. Still seems better than getting hit in the head by you."
"…I-I didn't actually mean I'd hit you, okay? It was a joke. I thought about it before I said it…."
"I know. You asked me to help you practice making friends. You're not going to hit one. Idiot."
"……."
"Though if you went that route, you could probably pick up a few guys who like getting hit by girls without much trouble."
"I-I'm not planning to make friends like that…!"
I put on an angry face and threw a few soft punches at Seo Woojin where he sat beside me, but underneath I was a little uncomfortable.
Making friends.
To put it coldly, it was nothing more than a way to slip an extra weight onto the Hansol Group's side of the scale, for the day the two of them set Hansol beside some other group and compared them. A device for planting a familiar face in their heads. A choice I'd been forced into because I was no good at studying and still needed to be of some use to my parents and the group. If even that reason hadn't existed, I probably would have spent my whole life sprawled around reading comics. Personally, I didn't think going without a single friend would get in the way of living.
So whenever someone looked at me with nothing but sincerity in their eyes, a strange guilt made me uneasy.
Just now, though—about three seconds ago, to be exact—that had shifted, a little.
"There's still a lot of alcohol left. I should try exactly three bottles of soju."
"…I-I'll come too…."
"Together? You're drinking too?"
"No. I just… want more juice. I've never had alcohol…."
"Sure, whatever. Oh—give me the cup. I'll top off the orange juice."
"Okay…."
It was good to have at least one friend. Same sex or otherwise. Someone you could talk to without thinking too hard. Someone comfortable to be around. Someone you could toss a light joke at and not worry. It was good to have one person like that.
…Licking Seo Woojin's cock so carefully a little while ago, burying my nose in deep when I didn't even have to, breathing in that thick male smell while I spun all sorts of—
…fantasizing about him pinning me down and taking me rough was a little embarrassing. And it was embarrassing that the first time I'd smelled cum, I'd liked it more than I expected and kept sniffing, trying to get more of it. But if I never said anything, he wouldn't know. Right.
We were friends.
Friends.
The kind of friend who'd do paizuri if he wanted. …And a blowjob, well. If he wanted that too, the kind of friend who'd do it.
I stared at Seo Woojin's back for a while, and only after he disappeared toward the kitchen did I wriggle off the bed.
"……."
…Yozora's position looked pretty different from before.
…Hmm.
She must just talk a lot in her sleep.