What Is This? (3)
I haven't had any real experience yet, but I’ve seen and learned plenty. "…Ngh, cra…zy……. Wait, ugh, ph-h-h……. …♡"
I know how good it feels to be pinned down by a male, unable to escape, while being fucked hard from behind. I know how good it feels to be kissed until I can’t say a word, while he drives himself in, thumping against the very root of my sex. I know how good it feels to have my hips—the kind that would clearly feel good to be pounded into—tilted to the side, to be held tight and completely immobilized by a male overflowing with sexual desire, and then, without him caring about my state at all, to have his fully engorged member shoved in to the hilt, being used until he’s satisfied.
I haven't had any real experience yet, but… these are all things I’ve seen and learned from manga.
"Heh…. Heh…. He-e-ex… H-h-ah……."
But it’s not like there’s a man right here beside me who can do that to me. No, wait, that’s not it. It’s not that I *want* a man like that beside me, it’s just that there isn't one. Yeah. That’s all. The nuance was a bit off, but I didn't mean anything else by it. I only read adult manga in the first place to find out what boys like. No, no, that sounds like I want to get a boyfriend, too…. What should I say? This is just a coincidence. I was just reading it hard to study, and then, um…. …I just… got wet….
If I’m wet, shouldn't I be having intercourse? But there’s no man here who can do that. No, that’s not it either…. …I don’t kno-o-ow….
"…. ……. ……♡"
Just like the men in the manga did for the women, I place my clitoris between my fingers and rub it diligently. My mind goes blank, electric currents crackle and snap down my spine, and even though strange, beast-like sounds spill from my mouth as I bury it into the pillow—*slap, slap*—I rub my already plump clitoris frantically with my fingers, scattering sticky arousal fluid over and over again onto the towel I’d laid out on the bed. …Until I finally gasp for air and let my hand drop limply onto the bed.
So much….
"Ph-h-h…. Ph……. H…."
…Ah. Right. This, they call it masturbation. When I searched on Google, a wiki popped up explaining it exactly like that. The description said something about relieving sexual desire alone without a partner…. Anyway, they say even though I’m human, I’m in heat like a beast. Yeah. …Ahahaha…. It’s funny. It’s so funny I feel like I might cry. Heat? Me? I’m perfectly normal, you know? Aside from the fact that I’m not sleeping at this hour, lying face down on the bed, holding my breath, and frantically touching my clitoris, I’m perfectly…. ……. …Perfectly normal, I tell you.
Ignoring my ears, which had been burning hot for a while, I groaned and pushed myself up. "…To, towels…. I need a few more…."
I am absolutely not doing this because I’m in heat. It’s an exploration of curiosity. That is the only reason. My hand, already a mess with arousal fluid after only a few minutes, was wiped roughly on the towel I’d just been using, and I staggered toward the dresser. This time, not caring about the color, I gathered five towels I’d folded hotel-style into my arms and threw them onto the bed. While the ivory and gray towels bounced around the bed on their own, I tied my hair back because it was getting in the way, threw the towel that had become damp from my earlier efforts onto the floor, and laid out a fresh one.
…Alright, now, until I’m satisfied, masturbating like before….
"……."
…Um. Instead of masturbating while imagining the manga I saw earlier, wouldn't it be better to just turn on my phone in front of me and watch that while I do it…?
"……Hmm."
Since he has ears and a tail, too, it might be easier to empathize with than other works….
84
The blanket I’d pushed far away so as not to get anything embarrassing on it. The towel connecting from the edge of the pillow to around my knees. My panties and soft, furry pajama pants slowly cooling off by the bedside. The warm, amber-colored mood light I’d turned on because looking at a phone in the dark is bad for your eyes. The setup was complete.
Having let out my lion ears and tail just to masturbate, I looked at my phone, twitching with a strange sense of self-loathing. Ah, to be more precise, "looked up at" would be the more accurate expression. Since I was buried face-down in the pillow with only my hips raised, I had to roll my eyes upward a bit to see the phone. I lay there in a shameful, yoga-like pose, blinking my eyelids.
"……."
Why does it feel like the expression "in heat" from earlier hits home now that I’m in this position? The internal cry of, "How about I just masturbate normally like before?" lasted only a moment. I began reading again from the scene where the white tiger’s tail is pulled and he’s being fucked hard, and I scrolled down, stroking my pink skin, *press, press*.
"Ngh-h……. …. Hick…."
My mind didn't even need imagination; it only needed to receive pleasure. Every time my fingers twitched, the image of the white tiger being ruined on the screen became vividly etched into my brain. …Crazy…. After pulling the tail with his hand, there was also sex while biting with his teeth too….
Pulling it didn't really sit well with me, but that one seemed like it would hurt a lot more…. "……."
Ju, just a little. Just to check. Yeah. That much, well, it wouldn't really hurt, right? …Does it even reach my mouth? …Ah. It barely reaches. Then, where….
……. …Ph-heh…. What is this, seriously…. It just hurts and doesn't really feel good…. Looking at the description, it even looks like he bit down so hard that a few hairs got into the protagonist’s mouth. If I were the woman lying there having sex, I definitely would have kicked him away with a back-kick in the middle of it. The author clearly doesn't know what they’re talking about.
Bye-bye to the tail that was soaked in saliva. After licking and wiping the few wheat-colored hairs left on my tongue against the pillow, I let out a huff of indifference, pressed down hard on my clitoris, and shuddered as I crammed the next descriptions from the screen into my brain.
A massive member with veins popping out… is violently thrusting into a… a pussy hole that looks far too narrow, as if to ruin it. *Thwack, thwack*, the sound of frantic, sticky thrusting. The hips, splashing lewdly, whether because he was thrusting so hard or to show off their softness. The image of the white tiger, with all sorts of hearts floating around his head as he is torn and ruined from behind, is crammed into my mind one after another.
Actually, the prologue was a bit different, but now it’s not much different from the sex scenes in the manga Yozora recommended, but maybe it’s because today is my first time learning to masturbate. One question bubbles up while watching such scenes. Does it really feel good even when he thrusts like that, as if he’s going to ruin the hole? Really? …Doesn't that make no sense logically? In the first place, that hole is narrow enough that a single finger could barely fit….
Should I check it out while I have the chance? After poking and prodding under my clitoris with my fingers for a while, spurting out arousal fluid, I wiped my hand, which was a mess and sticking between my fingers, roughly on the towel, and brought my hand a little higher up.
"Ugh…. Hu-u-uh……."
Since I was lying face down, there was a hole above where the urine comes out. There was one tiny hole—tiny enough that the word "tiny" wouldn't be enough even if I added it a hundred times. Just as I remembered, it was a hole small enough that a pinky finger would barely fill it. But when I tried to insert a finger inside, it felt like it might hurt a little….
"…Haah…. Ngh-h…."
…Let’s stop. I might be able to get my pinky in if I tried, but rubbing my clitoris like I was doing before is much easier and feels way better. I just need to get lightheaded. There’s no need to take the hard road. Watching the white tiger on the screen climax while licking the protagonist’s fingers, I pulled out the finger I’d been poking into the hole and tormented my clitoris, which was already slick and wet with arousal fluid.
Just as I’d learned from the manga, I applied pressure to my fingertips and rubbed it *slap, slap*, and sometimes I didn't stop there but pressed and crushed it. Not even five seconds later, when my trembling feet began to tap the bed quietly, I rubbed the sensitive spot inside my clitoris with my fingertips, *press, press*, while burying my face in the pillow so the sounds wouldn't leak out.
Just when my hips began to twitch and bounce upward. While grabbing whatever I could get my hands on, I rubbed my plump clitoris frantically.
"……?!? Ngh…ph-h-h……?♡"
Like the white tiger. Like this. For some reason, along with tears that kept welling up, after feeling a strange sensation of needing to urinate, a transparent liquid spilled out onto the towel in spurts. …This is probably the climax the manga was talking about. I buried my face back into the damp pillow and inhaled, *huk, huk*, dusty breaths.
It feels good. …It feels good, but I feel a bit resentful that I only found out this feels good at twenty because I was only studying, and just…, it feels so good I keep wanting to do it…, and I wonder if sex would feel even better than this if I were to go that far? That thought makes me excited, too. I don’t even know my own heart, so I ignore my twitching hips and keep pressing down hard on my clitoris. Not caring at all what happens to my body.
"Ph-he-eh, ph-he-eh…. Ah………."
No, no. The words I muttered without caution turn into strange sounds buried in the pillow. Even though I said "no" with my mouth, my hips are already moving back and forth creakily as if trying to escape my own hand, and my brain feels like it’s melting because I’m breathing while buried in a pillow full of the smell of saliva. In the midst of that, my hand, which cares for no other signals and is only busy chasing pleasure, tormented the clitoris that was twitching in the throes of climax as if crushing it.
And so, and so, I, again….
"…♡, ……?!, …, …………♡"
As if to wring out all the water in my body, I ended up scattering a ton of arousal fluid onto the damp towel. *Spurt, spurt*, the lewd sounds heard faintly, along with the SOS signal muffled by the pillow—"Help me, help me"—mixed with the smell of a female filling the bedroom, thumping against my eardrums.
Even a water gun that just fills with water and pulls the trigger doesn't pull its own trigger. Am I a person more pathetic than a water gun, touching my clitoris even while shouting "stop, stop" in my head?
"Ph-haah…. Huk, haah……. Ha…."
Pathetic. Right. I’m pathetic, aren't I? My body. Pulling my tail, I was actually pathetic enough to hide it even though it felt good enough to get me wet right away. Biting my tail with my teeth, I was pathetic enough to chew on it for a long time because it felt better than I thought, dirtying the towel, and only spitting it out after several minutes pretending I hadn't. Like a heroine in a male-oriented manga, I have a pathetic body. So, if I were to meet a man like the protagonist in a manga like that.
I….
"Ngh…."
Wait, just for a moment, around the time the name "Master" brushed through my mind. *Hoo, hoo*, as I tried hard to steady my breathing and regain my senses, I began to feel a slick dampness from the inside of my thighs down to my knees.
…Wow. Just how much did I spill….
…No, no. This isn't the time to be thinking about that, I didn't lay a towel down here…!
"I, I have to wipe…. Haah…. I have to wipe……."
…Come to think of it, how did I end up masturbating like this? I definitely couldn't sleep…. I was just looking at my phone…. Ah, an advertisement. I saw an advertisement. And… the thought continued to what men like…. Ah, right. Men like sex….
…Is that right…? Well, it must be. There were so many lewd manga…. Men like sex….
"Th, this is not the time, the towel…."
I remembered what I’d learned today properly and moved toward the bedside, fidgeting. *Clatter, clatter*, the noisy sounds I’d been holding back followed. The bed was tidied up with busy movements. And, this time, lying on my side….
……Somehow, from a certain moment on, my mind went blank, and the only thing I could vaguely recall was that it was Saturday, 2:00 PM, a day later. After sleeping in late and waking up, it was right after I heard the lady say, "Should I turn down the heating temperature?" as soon as I got up.