[Baek Seoyeon Has a Lot on Her Mind]
To be perfectly honest, my encounters with Baek Seoyeon were never exactly pleasant. If it were just a brief, private conversation, I could handle it with a dismissive, "You're being a nuisance," or a cynical, "Do you need a Healer that badly?" I could manage that much. But meeting her right next to a woman I’ve set my sights on makes it impossible not to think negatively, regardless of her true intentions.
For instance, I can't help but wonder: Is she doing something strange to Han Su-a with Yozora when I’m not around? That kind of thought. Well, for now, it’s just a suspicion I’m keeping in the back of my mind. Unless she’s being blackmailed by Yozora over some weakness, there’s no way she’d go to such lengths just to help a friend’s love life. She’s not an idiot.
"Su-a. Why did that person bring you back instead of Yozora?"
"Well, um... she said her feet hurt from the heels... and then... she suddenly started KakaoTalk-ing... and..."
Inside the elevator, just the two of us, Han Su-a clung to me tightly, her words slurring. The smell of alcohol clinging to her clothes wasn't a problem; I could just say she’d stepped out because someone she knew got hurt at a nearby bar. Given the circumstances, it seemed certain that Yozora had called Baek Seoyeon. And the part about her walking around in heels actually felt true, too.
I ran my hand through Han Su-a’s blonde hair, which reached all the way to my chin, and let out a doubtful sigh as I recalled Yozora. She preferred wearing slippers; in ten years, I’d never once seen her in heels. I even remembered her snapping at me once, claiming that heels were only for women with height complexes and that as long as you had good proportions like her, it didn't matter.
Yozora, in heels? I doubted she could even walk properly in them... Did she have some reason of her own? I pondered a few plausible excuses before tightening my arm around Han Su-a’s waist.
"So, you were alone with Yozora until you started drinking?"
"Yeah..."
"How long were you together?"
"Umm... 1 o'clock? Was it 1...?"
"You were together for quite a while. I thought maybe you two went to see a movie, but that doesn't add up with the time."
"We went to a comic cafe, too... Yozora dragged me around... and we took pictures on that forest path next to Hongdae, the one with the... train tracks...? Oh, and the movie is for next time with you, Teacher..."
I had worried that Yozora might be up to something strange, but hearing her story, it seemed they really had just hung out innocently. Of course, given who was involved, I couldn't shake the uneasy feeling entirely. But for now, there was no need to worry about what happened today... just that much.
However, that didn't mean I was happy about letting Yozora or Baek Seoyeon keep getting close to Han Su-a.
"..."
It looked like I’d need to set aside some time on Monday. Even if it was hard to pull Yozora away from Su-a right now, there was one person. One person who would be just fine if I never met them again.
214. The night turning into Sunday. After handing Han Su-a over to Seo Woojin and returning home, I collapsed onto the sofa, still in my sweat-drenched workout clothes. It wasn't because my legs hurt. And it wasn't because I was reminded of Yozora, whom I’d once accidentally caught masturbating on this very sofa. It was just... I was incredibly exhausted.
All I’d done today was organize the importance of the data to be leaked to Most Wanted, attend the Student Council remedial class, and work out. Why was I so tired?
"Phew..."
Overwork? That was a stretch; I’d only been working hard for about a year since becoming Student Council President last summer. What I suspected more was stress. And the first thing that came to mind, naturally, was Yozora’s message.
...You said you were listening well, so help me out? You’re not supposed to let the Academy find out your identity either, are you? I’m just doing what I have to do, so why should I give you a reward? It’s seriously annoying...
But that was just annoying; it was a stretch to say it caused me massive stress. Walking and running 40 minutes more than usual to drop off Han Su-a wasn't that much, either. Eventually, I pushed the stress theory aside and wondered what was different today... and the person standing at the end of that thought was him. Seo Woojin.
"..."
Had that ridiculous Gumiho radar hypothesis actually been true? I couldn't even delude myself into thinking that, because I didn't have a single lewd thought... I was just tired. If he had really influenced me, I wouldn't be tired; I’d be in heat, holed up somewhere, shoving my fingers into my pussy while cursing him out for making me do it.
It felt like those days years ago, after being sold off in a dozen suspicious leather bags in front of the orphanage director, doing all sorts of chores for the immature older girls. Because of that unpleasant, lethargic feeling, I rubbed my forehead against the sofa a few more times before starting to unzip the jacket I’d pulled up to my chin.
Zzzzip-
The air, heated up from running, escaped the jacket into the cold night air, making me feel a little better. I reached inside my sweat-soaked white t-shirt, unhooked my bra, and felt the tightness ease. I pushed my blue-black bangs back, headed to the kitchen, and gulped down some cold water. That felt better, too.
It wasn't quite overwork, but I must have hit a slight overload. It was too grand to call it burnout; I was just more tired than usual today. So, why not try washing up with cool water instead of hot for once?
I closed my eyes tightly against the fatigue, then opened them, tossed my clothes onto the sofa, and headed to the bathroom.
"..."
Beside the bathtub, which was filling with warm water as usual, I did something different. I turned the faucet just a bit and let the water hit my body. ...As someone who only showers in warm water even in the summer, it was a sensation hard to accept, but doing it once in a while didn't seem so bad. It wasn't freezing, just somewhere between lukewarm and cool.
While I was spraying the cool water over my body, my gaze, which had been unfocused, drifted toward my chest, where the water droplets were shattering against my nipples.
"..."
Why didn't touching those parts feel particularly good? Yozora, on the other hand, lived as if she existed solely to have pleasurable sex. Why? Was I cursed to be unable to feel anything?
"..."
Because of Yozora. Because of Yozora, who offered up Han Su-a just to look good to a single man named Seo Woojin, who claimed she was abandoned, who asked me to find her a better man, yet was clearly unable to forget him. Remembering that pervert who couldn't stop masturbating even when she heard the front door open, I carefully aimed the showerhead at my nipples.
Thirty seconds passed.
"...Umm."
As expected. It didn't feel that good. I’ll admit there was a ticklish sensation. It would be stranger if I felt nothing while tiny water droplets pelted my body. But that was it. The ticklish sensation ended as a ticklish sensation. Like someone scratching the back of my hand with their index finger.
Does breast size affect sensitivity? I’d heard that if they were big, it was hard to feel... no, that wasn't it. Then what about Yozora or Su-a, who were clearly bigger than me? It was definitely me who was weird. Everyone else said it felt good to touch there, so I couldn't be normal if all I felt was a tickle. Especially since I was a Gumiho-based mutant, a race that internet trolls loved to label with slurs like, "A Transcendental who’ll give it up if the dick is big," or "A Transcendental who’ll let you fuck her if you just touch her tits."
...Those fucking idiots. Internet losers who’d be lucky to see a Gumiho once in their lives—who were they to judge anyone?
"Haa..."
The sickening feeling of facing sexual harassment from behind the shield of anonymity boiled up, and I cursed under my breath. I shook my head to clear it, moved the showerhead to my stomach, and squeezed my wet nipples with my free hand. I was probably doing it clumsily since I lacked the knack, but even taking that into account, I didn't even reach the tip of pleasure.
Instead... it hurt. It made me think of the distant future, wondering what I’d do if it felt like this when I had to breastfeed a baby. If people were obsessed with sex because of feelings like this, I’d rather drink a cafe mocha. Instead of getting tangled up in a dirty mess with a man, I could get that much pleasure from the bittersweet taste between coffee and chocolate. And the lack of pain was a bonus.
In the end, I failed to make myself feel good by touching my chest. Naturally, my eyes drifted to a more explicit place.
"...Ugh."
Toward the place used for intercourse and the spot right above it—the body parts that existed solely for pleasure.
"Ugh... ugh..."
This place had more sensation than squeezing my nipples. Unfortunately, those sensations weren't what I’d hoped for... no, saying I’d hoped for them sounded weird. Instead... it was just pain.
Even touching it after a long time, the result was the same. Unlike my nipples, which at least felt ticklish, my clitoris had nothing. When I rested my finger on the entrance, I was scared, wondering if anything could actually fit in there. And when I tried to touch the clit as I’d learned from adult videos... I’d only touched it lightly, but it hurt so much my body felt like it was being electrocuted. It felt like it was screaming at me, "Don't touch me!"
"Huu..."
Would it be okay if I touched it even more gently? I tried to be as careful as possible, but my lower abdomen still throbbed and ached. Even though I’d relaxed as much as I could, the interest I’d managed to muster after so long cooled as quickly as the water hitting my body.
Come to think of it, Yozora had been pressing a vibrating tool hard against her clit. Specifically, she’d been lying face down so she could press it down with her own body weight. It felt unfair that while some people could twitch with mind-numbing pleasure from such intense stimulation, I only felt pain from a light touch of my finger.
And they say I’d give it up if the dick was big? ...Perverts. They’d never even had sex with me.
...It’s just that the old Gumihos happened to be perverts.
In reality, maybe the Transcendental who gives it up for a big dick is a mutant related to demons, like Yozora. Thinking such idle thoughts, I rinsed my wet hands with the showerhead and climbed into the bathtub to warm up. I had no idea that a mild case of body aches would be waiting for me the next day, forcing me to hole up in my blankets.