The Hero Who Does Squats in the Middle of the Road
"Huff, huff, huff." Even while traveling, one cannot skip training. I have a specialized, optimal workout routine for my body that I researched and analyzed over the course of 10,000 years. It isn't necessary to work out every single day. Once you reach a certain plateau, your muscle mass doesn't drop even if you don't provide stimulation for as long as a month. Still, if there's no consistent exercise, growth stops, so I can't be lazy. It's easy to build speed on a moving bicycle, but the pedals are heavy when you're at a standstill. When I was a beginner, cardio was important, but now it's almost unnecessary. I no longer have to force my body fat percentage down. There is a slight difference between aesthetically pleasing muscles and muscles that are actually strong. Right now, eating well and maintaining calories is more effective.
It's a bit inconvenient because there's no gym equipment, but they say a master calligrapher doesn't blame his brush. Dumbbells made by my younger siblings. And rocks that can be found anywhere. That's enough.
"Sisyphus, how much further?"
"We're almost there."
It's convenient having a weight-shifting magic shuttle. Cassandra is always bored to death whenever I'm working out.
"Don't just play around on the sidelines, you should work out too."
"I wasn't playing. I'm actually incredibly busy, you know."
"I suppose watching ants on the ground is quite the busy task."
"Hey, that's important work. How could I do that ignorant, brute-force exercise like Sisyphus?"
"Ignorant? This is all science. Muscles don't get strong just by using force like a brute. It's the principle that when you apply contraction, the fibers tear, and in the process of recovery, the protein increases the size..."
"Are you trying to appeal as an intellectual? How cute. Fine, I'll give you extra points."
"What kind of nonsense is that?"
"I don't know how it is in Greece, but in Troy, most intellectuals were scrawny and had a stuttering impression. To see a beast of a man like you talking about smart things, it's the first time in my life."
"That's prejudice."
"Is it? Socially awkward, doesn't wash often, smells musty like they haven't done laundry, clothes hanging loosely. That's what people usually think of when they hear 'intellectual'."
"Hmm."
For some reason, it was hard to refute. It was the characteristic of the kids who were good at studying, even in my so-called past life. The type who wouldn't join the group going to play basketball after school, but would instead get on the bus to the academy and stare only at their phones. The type who developed "text neck" from reading web novels in their spare time.
"Don't misunderstand. I actually prefer the intellectual type over muscle-heads with nothing in their brains. Why, aren't most mages intellectuals?"
"That is certainly unexpected. Is it because of Apollo?"
"That could be part of it. They've been bragging about how looking ignorant is 'cool' and 'manly.' It's annoying. Sisyphus, you reminded me of it. Take responsibility."
"Work out."
"I don't want to. What if my pretty arms and legs get hideously bulky?"
"Hey, what do you think when a beggar is worried about taxes?"
"Um... it would be funny, right?"
"That's exactly how I feel looking at you. Your belly is sagging, and you're worried about getting 'bulky'? Don't say funny things and just do it."
"When did you see my belly?! It's sagging? It's not that bad! It's not usually like this. My figure is great. I've just been in bad condition lately because I've been eating nothing but jerky on the boat."
"I can see it all under your clothes. Then don't eat it. Hand over the jerky. I need to replenish my protein."
"Uh..." Cassandra scratched her head.
"What?"
"I left all the luggage over there."
"All the food, too? Are you an idiot?"
"N-no, I'm not. Look. I kept the wine! The wine from Corinth is super sweet and good. Want to have a drink together?"
"I want to break the bottle over your head. I knew it from the moment you couldn't live without sweets in Olympia. You weren't cursed with anything else; you were cursed to turn into a pig."
"How can you say such mean things to a woman!"
"How can a woman only pick up and eat such bad things? Bring me my protein."
Thud.
Suddenly, a large deer dropped in front of me.
"Sisyphus, I got us some food."
"It's a water deer? An excellent source of protein."
Beads of sweat were forming on Clea's forehead. Did she catch this by herself?
"This thing must have been incredibly fast. You've got some skills."
"Pfft, it was nothing."
"Don't be cheeky. I'll handle the butchering, so go wash up."
"Okay."
Clea turned away with a light step. I saw her lips curl into a smirk toward Cassandra.
"Am I the only one here who's useless?"
Cassandra approached me and began drawing a magic circle with a swipe.
"Sisyphus, I'll light the fire. How about that? It's convenient since you don't have to struggle with flint, right?"
"I can light a fire like that in a few seconds."
"Really! Why are you so cold only to me? Would it kill you to speak nicely?"
Sizzle—
It's water deer meat, which I've eaten until I'm sick of it. Without even thinking, my body is automatically butchering it and starting the cooking process.
"You'd speak nicely if you did your job. Try prophesying about Olympus."
"Haa, I told you, my prophecies don't work like that. I can only see one scene of an important choice. I don't know the fate. I need many clues related to that scene."
"Oh? You can't do it?"
As I tore off a piece of deer meat and offered it to her, Cassandra pouted her lips.
"Whose prophecy about Olympus do you want to know?"
"Anyone. Zeus or Hades would be even better."
"Let's see... uuum, ah! Sisyphus, if you go to Athens like this..."
"Yeah."
"...Give me some meat. Then I'll tell you."
"You first."
"Aigoo, seriously! There's so much here, you're not planning to eat it all by yourself, are you? Why are you so stingy?"
"You get it when you do your job. You didn't see anything, did you?"
"No! I can prophesy right away! I'm telling you, it's true!"
"Looks delicious."
Clea approached and squatted down next to the campfire. She must have washed up at the nearby stream, as her hair was tied up, revealing her snow-white neck.
"Wait a bit. I'll cut some for you."
"Okay, thanks."
I cut a piece of steaming tenderloin for her, and Clea blew on it and chewed it happily.
"Delicious."
"Water deer meat is special."
As I was enjoying the meal with Clea, Cassandra finally exploded.
"You two are having a moment, give me some too! Isn't this too much?"
"You can't even prophesy."
"I told you I can do it right away..."
"One piece for every ten squats."
"What's a squat?"
Huff, huff. I showed her a demonstration.
"Is it just sitting down and standing up? What is this, it's not even that hard."
"Do it. Keep your back straight and look forward. Feet a little wider than shoulder-width. Lower only your hips. That's it."
"One, two, three... h-huff?!"
Cassandra immediately started trembling and almost fell over.
"Wh-what is this? Why is it so hard?"
"This is serious. You should do this consistently starting today, if only to think about running away from magical beasts."
"Hieek. Wait. The inside of my thighs are pulling so much. Rest, let me rest."
"Don't whine."
While I was training Cassandra, Clea also approached.
"Sisyphus, I want to try that exercise too, can you teach me?"
"Sure."
To think exercise would be this popular. I'm proud.
"How did you say the posture was? I couldn't see it properly earlier."
"Keep your back straight and stand with your feet a little wider than shoulder-width."
"Hmm... I don't really get the feel of it. Can you support my back while I sit?"
"Sure."
I supported Clea's waist with my left hand and lightly pressed down on her shoulders with my right to keep them straight.
"...Mmm."
As my fingers touched her, Clea's body flinched slightly.
"Did it hurt?"
"N-no, press down slowly."
"Okay."
Clea executed the squat motion, slowly pushing her pelvis back. The posture isn't bad? I'm very satisfied.
"Hooo. ...Inhale."
She's even controlling her breathing on her own.
"Inhale..."
I wonder if she's inhaling for too long.
"You have to exhale."
"Oh? Ah, okay."
Clea turned her head sharply.
"Aha, that kind of style. Odysseus, you were a scary person."
For some reason, Cassandra was looking at us with disapproval. I felt like Clea was smiling at Cassandra.
"Certainly a scary talent for exercise. You've been good at using your body since long ago."
"Since long ago? Hmph."
Clap, Cassandra clapped her hands.
"Sisyphus, can you check my posture too? I don't know if my hips are going down properly. It's a problem if they're too big, you know."
"Do ten more."
"Why are you only like that to me!"
Whoosh, I threw a piece of meat, and Cassandra jumped up and caught it in her mouth. Nom nom.
"Do ten more."
"Oh, seriously... it is tasty, though. Huff."
We spent a fulfilling evening like that.
Athens, a large city on the Greek mainland. There is a rocky hill called the Areopagus in the city. Dozens of nobles were gathered at that spot, which overlooks the entire city of Athens.
"Today, the hero of Sigma, Heracles' party, has officially refused the next expedition."
A council composed of intellectuals elected by the citizens decides on important city matters. The fact that they introduced partial democracy is what makes Athens the most distinct from most poleis that are ruled by kings. Of course, Athens has a king, and the king has the final say on truly important matters like war. However, in many aspects such as policy, the council moves for the citizens. This is also the background of how Athens developed into a large city.
"This is a big problem. At this rate, many heroes will leave due to the Cretan Treaty."
"Even now, the attacks by magical beasts are becoming increasingly severe. If we lose more heroes, there's no guarantee that Athens will survive the 'Divine Punishment'."
"According to information from the Eranoi Guild, the number of poleis that have disappeared due to that Divine Punishment has reached five in one year. It's an unprecedented cycle."
Divine Punishment. That is what they call the scale of magical beast attacks that even heroes cannot resist. It's not just a matter of one or two disaster-level beasts appearing.
"Is the rumor true that Olympus is at war with the Titans?"
"That appears to be the case. That might be why the Divine Punishment has become stronger."
"To use the heroes or magical beasts that have grown stronger in the war?"
"Hmm..."
Even if they didn't say it out loud, the intellectuals of Athens knew. The reason magical beasts appear endlessly is because it is profitable for Olympus. Magical beasts harm people and come to possess even stronger mana. It is the same even if there is a hero who has become strong by subjugating those beasts. They, too, will eventually die to a magical beast, and even higher-quality mana will be condensed. Olympus's purpose is mana. It was a fact that could be easily known just by looking at the behavior of periodically collecting mana through rituals. Usually, they keep this balance, but it must be that they are in a hurry for mana to use in the war. So, they collect a large amount of mana through Divine Punishment, even if it means poleis disappear.
Athens is a large city and is under the protection of the goddess Athena, so they thought, "Surely they wouldn't inflict Divine Punishment on us?" But the council has been preparing for the worst by increasing the number of resident heroes through various policies. Strong heroes are always needed.
"Socrates, urgent news!"
"What is it?"
One person who was late for the meeting ran in, out of breath, and shouted urgently.
"The great hero Sisyphus, who subjugated the god Hermes, has just arrived in Athens!"
"What?! Is that true!"
"Does that mean the subjugation of the Thief God was true?"
"Didn't they say it was true? The delegation that went to Corinth saw it clearly!"
"We must never let them go. We must serve them in Athens at any cost!"
"Let's go greet them first!"
The people gathered at the meeting all at once went down the hill and moved with quick steps. The outskirts of the city. The hero party that had just entered was visible.
"Oh, are those them!"
"Are those... them, right?"
The council blinked at the sight unfolding before them. Sisyphus, the protagonist of the Thief God subjugation, was...
"Ten more."
"Ugh, ugh. Sisyphus! Do we really have to do this right now?!"
"Muscle loss."
He was teaching Cassandra the posture, doing squats in the middle of the road.