The Secret Beneath the Skin
Past midnight. I finished my daily missions in the mobile game I’ve been obsessed with lately and wiggled my hips. "Get your head off me." The guy using my butt as a pillow—my Childhood Friend, Park Siho—was fast asleep. I’d been wondering why he’d gone so quiet. Does he really think my ass is a pillow?
"Ah… stay still…." Siho mumbled, pulling my waist toward him and gripping my butt tight. ……That crazy bastard. He lacks any sense of delicacy. I’m a woman, for heaven’s sake, but he doesn't seem to think of me as one at all. ……Is my charm lacking? I’m certain that’s not it. Between the DMs that buzz until I’m sick of them and the upperclassmen who hit me up every evening offering to buy me drinks, I know exactly how attractive I am to men. Pretty girls know they’re pretty. Subjectively or objectively, I’m a beautiful girl. That’s not narcissism; it’s a fact. If I weren't, would men be hitting on me? I’m confident in my body, too, not just my face. I keep it toned with consistent exercise. Thanks to a genetic blessing, I’ve got a large chest, wide hips, and a butt that’s plump enough to look good in jeans.
And yet. Park Siho, this guy, doesn't seem to feel a thing for me. I lounge around on his bed until late every night in outfits that offer zero defense, but he’s completely indifferent, as if his lower half isn't functioning properly. I blame the fifteen years we’ve spent together. Even if we aren't blood-related, considering the time we’ve shared, we might as well be family. Who would lust after their own family? I mean, incest exists, but that’s a very rare case. Anyway, because of those fifteen years, Siho treats me like family.
"Wake up."
"Ow!" I slapped Siho’s sleeping face with my palm. He frowned and pushed himself up. "Try waking me up a little more gently, will you?"
"Wasn't that gentle enough?" I sat up, too.
"Heading out?"
"Yeah, gotta go."
"Good night."
"Yup, yup."
I left Siho’s bedroom. *Sigh.* Another day, another trip home with absolutely nothing happening. How can a man and a woman be in the same space—a space with a bed, no less—and have nothing happen? I don't get it. I shook my head and walked to my place. My apartment is right next to Siho’s. Not figuratively—it’s literally right next door. Siho is in 703, and I’m in 704.
As soon as I got inside, I took off my pants. As they slid down, the cool night air brushed against my heated crotch. I shivered at the refreshing relief. "As expected…." I reached down and groped my G-Spot through my panties. It was damp. Not because of my period—that ended recently. There’s another reason my panties were soaked. "Should I have teased him more?"
I stroked my butt, pressing down on the spot where Siho had smacked me earlier. The stinging had faded long ago. I know how perverted it is to think this, but… honestly, it felt good when he hit me. It hurt, sure, but a mysterious, ticklish sensation traveled up my spine and poked at the top of my head, giving me a dizzying sense of pleasure. One hit wasn't enough. I wanted him to keep smacking my butt until I was crying tears of frustration. But that one hit was all I got. After that, I started having all these lewd fantasies, and I ended up soaking my panties—all while Siho was using my butt as a pillow.
"Haa… mm…." I lay on my bed, wedged my hand between my thighs, and rubbed my crotch through my panties. Does Siho know? That I masturbate every night imagining him holding me? He wouldn't know. Back in middle school, I couldn't understand why my friends were so tormented by their unrequited crushes. But now, having gone through high school and into college, I’ve spent four years painfully understanding the feelings I couldn't grasp back then.
I’m too scared to confess my feelings honestly. Looking at how Siho treats me now, there’s a high probability that a crack would form in our relationship. Once a crack appears, it would widen until it eventually split us completely in two. That scares me to death. If he were just a guy friend, I would’ve confessed already—if we dated, we dated, and if I got rejected, I’d move on. But my Childhood Friend, Park Siho, is someone who cannot be missing from my life. He’s my friend. My family. My memories.
"Ha… mm…." I rubbed my crotch with three fingertips, and the moisture spread, making my panties go from damp to soaked. I lifted my hips, hooked both thumbs into the elastic, and pulled down. My panties rolled up like a rope, sliding past my thighs and catching on my knees. I lifted my legs high and kicked them off one by one, throwing the wet panties under the bed. "I really leaked a lot today."
Just from one smack on the butt, my crotch was drooling. Sorry, girl, there’s no dick for you today. Since I was feeling deprived, I decided to comfort my drooling crotch with my fingers. I used my index and middle fingers to spread the plump, fleshy lips. *Squelch.* The flood of fluids had dried slightly, making it sticky. I used my other hand to rub between the parted lips, focusing especially on the top. I carefully peeled back the hood with my fingernails, and a tiny little bean popped out. I rubbed that little bean, driving myself crazy.
"Ha… ah… ha…." My mouth fell open against my will, and a sorrowful breath escaped my lips. Touching such a tiny, pin-sized part of my body was enough to control my entire being. As I pressed and swirled my finger over my clitoris, it tingled as if electricity were running through it. That current spread to my thighs, making me shyly pull them together. I started by slowly rolling my finger over it, then gradually increased the speed, rubbing it faster and faster. Like I was trying to shake it off.
As I flicked my two fingers rapidly against my clitoris, the electricity that had been swirling around my crotch followed my spine all the way to the top of my head. It felt so refreshing. My body went limp, and my eyes glazed over for a moment. Usually, I’d stop masturbating at this level of pleasure, but because Siho had hit my butt earlier, I was even more aroused and kept going. I rubbed, stroked, and rubbed again. Sweat started to flow, and at the same time, it began to cool. My skin turned cold, but my belly grew even hotter.
"Hut… ahh… ha…." I rubbed my clitoris like a horny monkey, and it felt like someone was pinching it, sending a jolt of electricity through me as my hips arched high. "Hnn… mm…!" My butt trembled, my vision turned white as if a light had flashed, and all the strength drained from my body as if I were being sucked under the bed.
"Haaa……." I exhaled the hot breath that had been knotted in my gut. I lay there with my legs half-spread, staring blankly at the ceiling. With my legs open, I could feel my hole throbbing, as if it were begging to be filled. "Ah, I want to be fucked by Park Siho."
I muttered something a sex-crazed teenage boy would say. "Come to think of it… when was the last time I saw it?" I thought of Siho’s dick. The last time I saw the real thing was back in middle school. We used to see each other often when we bathed together as kids, but I was indifferent back then, and in middle school, we showed each other our privates out of adolescent curiosity. I haven't seen it since. It must have gotten bigger, right? It must be thicker, too. I want to play around and pretend it was an accident so I can pull his pants down and see how much it’s grown. But now, even if I try to play-wrestle, I get instantly pinned down because of the overwhelming difference in our strength.
Still. I’ve seen him sporting a tent in the morning a few times. That erection, standing tall as if to show off its majesty. Just looking at the size of it, I can tell it’s grown tremendously. "But I want to see the real thing…." I sighed and rolled around on the bed. "…Should I ask him to show me?" I thought about it seriously for a second, then chuckled. "Like that’ll ever happen."
I mocked myself for having such a stupid thought. If I said, "Hey, show me your dick," I’d be called a crazy bitch. Conversely, if Siho said to me, "Hey, show me your pussy," how would I react? At first, I’d be flustered and embarrassed, and I’d probably snap at him a few times,
but in the end, I feel like I’d actually end up showing him.
"We're childhood friends, so what's wrong with showing each other our genitals ?" It's not like it'd be the first time seeing it either.
And who knows, Siho might just nonchalantly show me his, too. Because that guy doesn't think of me as a woman. He's exactly the type of guy who would willingly pull down his pants and tell me to look all I want if I wanted to see it.
Honestly… I really don't know how he would react. No matter how long you've been childhood friends, you don't know everything about each other. What you don't know, you just don't know. People have secrets they can't even tell their family, so it's bound to be the same with friends. Even if it looks like someone is hiding nothing, they are hiding something.
Just like how I'm hiding my unrequited love for Park Siho.
"How long do I have to keep hiding it… "
Slowly, I was reaching my limit.