No More, No Less (2)
The Hammer of Vanity.
Together with the Fang of Truth, it was one of the two artifacts Freya possessed.
Its grade, incredibly, was… impossible to estimate.
Even within the Dimension System, its rating displayed nothing but '??'.
"That's not what I was asking. What happens to me like this?"
"You'll know when you watch the memories. I don't have a clue either."
He would have needed to be on the receiving end of that hammer to know.
"Haah… so what do we do now?"
"First things first — get a rough grasp of the situation."
Saying that, Lee Jun looked at Silhouette standing before him.
She had somehow become a runt of a girl, around eight years old.
And yet her hair remained exactly the same length as the original's — an utterly bizarre state of affairs.
"What's with that look?"
"This is… what I looked like back when I was sealed away in there."
"From when you were bound?"
"Yeah. Right up until you opened it for me, I stayed like this the whole time."
So this was how she'd been sealed inside the Gate….
Why had she reverted to that form?
And the change wasn't limited to Silhouette, either.
Lee Jun was different from usual as well.
"That's…."
His wrist.
The part of it that Silhouette had severed was simply gone.
It wasn't bleeding, and there was no cut surface to be seen — it had just vanished, as if wiped away with an eraser.
From where it had been severed… nothing stirred except a black aura flickering like shadow.
"The Hammer of Vanity has the power to strip away the veneer wrapping a thing. I suppose this is what happens… when you bring it down on a person."
This was probably Lee Jun's true essence.
So his wrist really hadn't been attached properly after all, huh.
"No way. I retrieved everything I planted in you, you know?"
"Then somehow, a crack must have formed."
"Hmm…."
She gazed at his wrist with a troubled look.
Was she sorry, even though it was her own doing?
In a way, the situation now was funny, when he thought about it.
Back then, they'd fought like they were trying to kill each other.
How on earth had they ended up… in a relationship like this?
{Strange to you as well, is it not?}
"……?"
Right behind him.
From a short distance away came Freya's voice.
But even when he turned to look, there was no sign of her.
Only… the living room they'd been in until a moment ago, and a black membrane spread out in the shape of a barrier.
{No matter how you look around, you will see nothing. What you stand in now is your own mindscape.}
Freya's voice continued on.
And this sensation was… somehow familiar.
It felt just like when Silhouette spoke to him.
Whether she knew it or not, Silhouette simply kept staring up at Lee Jun from right beside him.
"A mindscape, then… is that something like a Domain?"
{Decidedly not. The you in reality is unconscious as we speak.}
"Then what is this place?"
{A space to which I have confined your consciousness.}
"That membrane you spread out — was that for this, too?"
{Aye. If it spread too wide, even the hammer's power could not hold you in.}
A hollow laugh escaped Lee Jun.
So much for "what's a mere Chief of the Technical Bureau supposed to do, anyway?"
He'd taken one hell of a hit.
"Haah… well, fine. So why did you do this?"
{Why, you ask…? Call it treatment.}
"Treatment?"
{Aye. That little creature over there.}
A flinch—
At Freya's call, Silhouette gave a small shudder.
Clinging tightly to Lee Jun's leg, she avoided the direction the voice was coming from.
"…What's with her?"
{Kya-ha-ha-ha! So even such a dangerous creature fears a situation like this!}
"Dangerous?"
Dangerous… well, she had a point.
Come to think of it, she was the one who'd cut off his wrist, too.
Seeing it vanish even here, inside his consciousness… back then, if things had gone even slightly wrong, he might have ended up in a state worse than death.
{Only just now realizing that? Tch, optimistic as ever, I see.}
"If I'm an optimist, then Euripides must have been a hopeless romantic."
{…There are times I truly cannot fathom a word you say.}
Her tone carried something like a sigh.
Though he had no idea what he'd said that was so strange.
"Anyway. Did this really require going so far as to use the Hammer of Vanity?"
{It did. From what I can see, you know precious little about that fellow — and if left alone, you never will. Is it not this body's role to deliver such pitiful souls from ignorance?}
Hearing Buddhist terminology in the common tongue of Awakeners come out of a dwarf's mouth was quite the fresh experience — but finishing this situation before the others woke took priority.
So Lee Jun decided to go along with what Freya was saying.
Well… most of what she did was for his own good anyway.
It had always been that way, so he'd just trust her this time too.
"Then what do you need me to do?"
{Hearken to the brilliant solution this body has prepared. I shall grant you the means to properly handle that creature trembling over there.}
Ain set down her empty coffee cup and spoke.
"Are you sure this is okay?"
"That's what I keep telling you, is it not? What, you can't trust me now?"
"Seeing him in that state, I imagine anyone would think the same…."
At the end of Ain's gaze stood Lee Jun.
Lee Jun, lying motionless on the floor like a corpse.
With his eyes shut fast, lying there as if dead, the sight of him… made one want to check whether he was still breathing.
And on top of him.
Freya, stamping down again and again on the chest of the prone Lee Jun.
"There's a saying in Korea, isn't there? 'No more, no less — may every day be like Chuseok.'"
"…What does that have to do with anything right now?"
"It means every day ought to be as good as the harvest festival, does it not? And I'll hardly stand by and let you spend such a day carrying an error around."
So it was fine for him to be stomped on like that, then?
The thought crossed her mind… but she didn't bother pointing it out.
She knew perfectly well why Freya was doing this, after all.
"The energy is gathered together to a remarkable degree. At this level, it's practically binding his heart in shackles. And yet he managed to scrape through this whole incident in this state."
Freya knew that Lee Jun had played quite a significant role in the auction house incident.
She'd been brought in to help with the damage recovery, after all.
Even in a corner of the building's corridor — not inside the auction hall where Bernadotte had made his name — the traces of fierce combat remained.
And judging by the circumstances, the one behind those traces was… most likely Lee Jun.
Having seen the site with her own eyes, Ain could roughly estimate the scale of that battle as well.
"Well… he wouldn't want it known, so I kept it hidden. Hmm. I do wish this boy would rack up some credit for himself, though."
"A person of great ambition does not fixate on small things. Unlike you, Lady Freya."
"Tch, enough of your useless prattling."
"Am I wrong?"
Freya didn't deny it, either.
She had lived her life gazing only at the small things that happened to be right in front of her.
It had been the same back on the Prilea continent.
Gold, gold, and nothing but gold.
Scraping together money by any means necessary, churning out all the artifacts she wanted to make — that was how she passed her days.
She did nothing else.
Because this alone was enough to satisfy her.
"In other words, you were a playabout."
"Say rather the very model of a productive smith."
"Wasn't it a hobby rather than work? Then you were unemployed, weren't you?"
"A hobby of that scale is a profession, girl."
Still, even she didn't much bother to argue the point.
That was simply how this trade had always been.
Dwarves set no long-term goals; they lived day to day as things came.
Once in a lifetime, such a one changes completely — and Freya simply hadn't reached that moment yet.
"In my opinion… I don't think that moment will ever come for you."
"Nay, it will come. Every smith, without exception, meets the moment that decides the direction of their life."
The destiny of a smith is to forge weapons.
And for such people, the one who gives their life its direction is… naturally, the one who wields those weapons.
Freya was still searching for that someone.
All the way past her youth, by dwarven reckoning.
Some of that was simple misfortune — but it was also because her standards were so insufferably high.
"And yet you said not long ago that you might finally have found them, didn't you?"
"Aye, that I did."
"Then you must carry that hope… all the way to the end, mustn't you?"
Saying this, Ain looked at Lee Jun.
Something must have begun to pain him, because his face had furrowed more than before.
Yes — it's starting.
Thump— thump—
In time with that reaction, more weight settled into Freya's feet.
What Freya had explained was simple, if nothing else.
Far too many things had taken up residence around Lee Jun's heart all at once.
Because of that, his health could suffer, she said.
Freya would untangle those knotted energies herself.
Lee Jun's job was… to endure the pain.
And to keep the rampaging energies under control.
"Haah… haah…."
Lee Jun breathed heavily under a pressure that crushed his whole body.
It felt as if gravity had tripled.
Even just standing in place was a struggle.
"You… you okay?"
"So far… I can manage…."
Silhouette seemed a little smaller than before.
Let's see… maybe ten centimeters shorter?
He had no idea what that meant, but she wasn't going to disappear entirely… right?
"Whew…."
Lee Jun wiped away the sweat pouring down like rain and straightened his back, which kept folding toward the ground.
Then he rested a hand on the head of the little girl watching him anxiously from beside him.
"Don't worry. I got pretty attached to you over the past month."
A little short of thirty days.
Over that stretch — a short one, depending on how you looked at it — Silhouette had been bound to Lee Jun the entire time.
Twenty-four hours a day, together.
He'd even grown used to her piping up in his head from time to time.
Family… maybe not quite, but he could call her a friend.
"You crawl under my skin sometimes… okay, a lot of the time… but you're not boring to have around, you know?"
"…Yeah."
"This is my mindscape… so whatever I don't want to happen won't happen."
He still couldn't read her true intentions.
Neither the illusions she'd shown him before, nor the dreams.
Nor those hazy words that rattled his mind.
But one thing was certain… an oath sworn on mana did not lie.
"Trusting you is the only thing I can do anyway."
"I… suppose so."
"So this much warmth is enough, right now."
Doubting each other in moderation, bickering in moderation.
And yet, somehow, quite reliably.
"That's all it needs to be."
The pressure bearing down on his body slowly eased.
And at the same time, his chest grew warm.
Was this a sensation felt from inside here, or from reality out there?
Before he could even wonder… he closed his eyes, wrapped in that gentle warmth.
"……."
Watching him, Silhouette felt a question stir.
Come to think of it, she still didn't know.
Why, back then… had I sworn an oath on mana to this man I'd fought like I meant to kill?
"Honestly… you're a strange man."
And why had he done it?
Why had he trusted her?
She could read his thoughts, feel his emotions, share his memories — so she knew.
He had simply always been that kind of person.
He judged with a cold, rational eye — and yet, in the end, he always embraced.
Was that what they'd call being full of heart?
No. It was that he believed in bonds.
Because she could feel the same thing he did, she knew it.
Even now.
Lee Jun had opened every one of his memories to Silhouette, an entity whose nature even she barely understood.
Even though the reverse was impossible.
"……."
Silhouette pressed both her small hands down gently over the hand resting on her head.
Someday.
When she had reclaimed all of her incomplete memories.
When she, too, learned what kind of monster she truly was.
"…Even then, will you still pat my head?"
She didn't know.
But… she could feel it.
That you, probably.
Would.