Prologue: The Day I Resolved to Jerk Off to Tentacle Porn, No Matter What
Bam!
"Kyaa!!"
"A person...!"
While crossing the crosswalk, a truck suddenly accelerated and slammed into someone—and that someone was me.
"Cough..."
When I opened my eyes, I was already rolling on the ground, drenched in blood. I figured I was done for. My body was smashed to bits, so my brain—sensing imminent death—frantically pumped out painkillers, making it feel like I'd drift off peacefully without a hitch... but in my final moments, all I could think about was the big-titted hentai I hadn't gotten to fap to yet.
I don't wanna die...
'Huh?'
When I snapped out of it, I was in some bizarre place. I'd been drifting over black waves with no sun or moon in sight, and then I arrived somewhere with a golden blonde twintail beauty enveloped in lighthouse-bright light. She reached out a hand to me.
"Thou art dead."
She declared my death.
"A child born human, yet unable to live a human life."
"I don't wanna die!"
I clung desperately to this total stranger. Rawr! Her thighs are so squishy!
"...I am the goddess Premium."
"Save me, Goddess! I don't wanna die!"
Even though I was just a limbless blob of light, I rubbed against her for dear life. She's gotta be the goddess who came to rescue me!
"Cease thy clinging."
"Goddessss!"
"...State thy wish."
For real? This super popular, drop-dead gorgeous blonde twintail goddess—who looked ready to coldly brush me off with some "can't even reincarnate a loser like you♡" bullshit—was gonna grant my wish?
"Be my girlfr—"
"I shall depart."
"Sorry! I climbed up without thinking, I'm sorry!"
Hooking up with the goddess was a no-go. But hey, worth a shot, right? When a hot goddess offers to grant your wish, it's hard not to get ideas.
"Poor human child, what dost thou desire?"
"Make me a Tentacle Monster in my next life."
If I got to be reborn, I wanted to come back as a tentacle monster. That was a wish I'd harbored for ages.
"Thou wishest to be born a monster?"
Premium blinked in slight surprise, her eyes widening. It was the first change in expression I'd seen from her. Was wishing to be a monster that shocking?
"Isn't being born human the usual deal?"
"I am the mother of monsters. I cannot shape thee as a human."
"Perfect then!"
"Monsters are ever shunned and reviled."
Now her eyes even looked a little sad. Maybe a bit exaggerated, but it seemed like she wanted me to take it back.
"No regrets! It's the life I've always wanted."
"......"
Premium enveloped me with her hand. I, now a blob of light, tumbled right into it.
"Come forth! The sweet life of a delectable chokgoe!"
"...This will not do."
"Huh?"
Why the sudden change?
"Thou saidst thou wouldst grant my wish! Are you really a goddess?"
I shrieked.
"Tentacle Monsters do not exist."
It hit harder than that truck.
"...A blonde twintail ultimate beauty goddess who revives the dead exists, but no tentacle monsters?"
"To begin with... what even is a tentacle monster?"
"The mother of monsters doesn't know!?!"
She doesn't know? Screw it, go big or go home! I'm dead anyway! Like a raging hamster, I scampered across the goddess's palm.
"A tentacle monster is an ero★creature that conquers every hole on a woman's body with its countless tentacles!"
"......"
"Its secretions are hentai juice that gets absorbed into a woman's body, amplifying pleasure 3,000 times! No, up to 10,000 times!"
"Enough."
"Even the most rebellious woman screaming 'no' at first ends up eyes-rolling-back, squirting like a fountain from this sex machine!"
I put extra emphasis on "sex."
The goddess Premium gazed at me with pity.
"Such a creature... could not possibly exist in reality, could it?"
"......Is it possible? A 10,000x pleasure ero creature!"
"There are no tentacle monsters."
Nooooo! It can't be!
"You fake goddess, get lost!"
I wailed like the end of the world had come. It's over! No matter what anyone says, tentacles are the root of it all, right? A world chasing sweet pure love or harem crap without any romance—I'll pass!
"Is it not laughable to expect such a being, born of thy filthy imaginations, to exist in nature?"
Then why does a big-titted blonde twintail goddess exist...
"...Was it such a shock, that tentacle monsters do not exist?"
"Hic... sob...!!"
No tears came, but damn, it hurt.
"...No helping it, then."
"Goddess?"
"I shall newly create thee. And thou shalt be reborn—not in thy old world, but in another."
As a tentacle monster?
"I love you, tsundere goddess!! I'll serve you forever."
"Harbor no resentment, even if it is not the life thou desired."
A brilliant light illuminated everything around us. For some reason, my chest swelled with emotion, leaving me speechless.
Thank you, Goddess.
The touch of the goddess's hand reached me.