46. The Path to Becoming a Magical Girl
46. The Path to Becoming a Magical Girl
Aboard a luxury passenger ship.
As if the whole "medieval" identity had been tossed overboard somewhere along the way, the vessel surged forward, its magical engine churning with vigor.
Feeling the briny sea breeze slap against my face on the deck, I couldn't help but grumble about this absurd reality.
"Hey, it's been twenty years in my past life and twenty in this one—forty years total since I went on a school trip, so my memory's fuzzy. But do school trips normally happen after summer vacation ends?"
"Who knows? Different worlds, different seasons—maybe that's why?"
"That's... is that even an answer? More importantly, do universities even go on school trips?"
"Uh... normally they don't?"
"Then what kind of trip is this, happening two months from now?"
"..."
Nicol fell silent.
Even he had no word to define this situation.
If we had to deduce the cause, the only way to explain this mess was that a reincarnator who came long before us had conveyed the concept of a "school trip" in some bizarrely distorted fashion.
I stared out at the almost cruelly blue horizon and retraced how we'd gotten here.
As you could see, we were heading for Karamzin Territory.
Because a school trip—something I'd never asked for—had been scheduled there two months from now.
Since things had come to this, I admitted defeat and headed for Karamzin Territory, figuring it was better to take the beating early.
Wow, an advance rehearsal for a school trip.
Go ahead—try and find another student as diligent as me.
The one small mercy was that the Calamity Duke was so busy he often left the territory, and Karamzin Territory itself was vast. Unless I sought him out or he came after me, we wouldn’t meet.
...Or so I indulged in a fantasy that had no chance of coming true.
I sighed and turned my head. Diane had been sunbathing on the deck and was waving at me.
The prime culprit behind this whole mess looked utterly at ease.
Let's think about this logically.
The name Karamzin came up in front of me, the lord's daughter happened to be there, and then the school trip destination was set to her territory. Could that really be a coincidence?
And on top of that, they'd only invited the Hero Department.
It was so blatant that I almost wondered if it was some reverse-psychology high-level mind game.
But no matter how much I complained, rationalized, or indulged in wishful thinking, reality wouldn't change. I gave up and headed for the railing.
I'd wanted to use a portal, but some of the filming equipment couldn't pass through teleportation or portals, so we were traveling by ship—the height of inefficiency.
Still, romantic ideals were practically synonymous with inefficiency.
And I knew a particular romantic pleasure you could only find on this ship.
"Boss, where are you going?"
"When I've got a lot on my mind, nothing beats fishing."
Squinting against the harsh, beating sunlight, Nikolai looked at the railing I'd pointed to.
Where his gaze landed, there was a black line that seemed a bit too thin and a bit too limp to be part of the railing.
More like... a fishing line.
"Huh?"
Ignoring his dumbfounded noise, I started reeling in the line I'd hung from the rail.
Something heavy definitely seemed to be on the other end.
Diane, who'd been watching me with curiosity, came up beside me.
"What're you doing?"
"Net fishing."
"Ooh, how exciting."
As it happened, she seemed interested in net fishing too, so she started helping me haul the net up.
Around the time the net had come up partway, Nikolai finally snapped back to his senses and jabbed a finger at me.
"Wait, when did you even set this up?!"
"About five minutes after we departed?"
As I answered Nikolai, I inspected the net we'd hauled up—six fish were flopping around inside.
"Is this a good catch?"
"Hmm... decent enough."
I answered and began putting the fish into a water barrel.
Still, all six were decent fish for sashimi, so this was above average at least.
I stowed the net and promptly pulled a cutting board from my bag, laying a single mackerel on it.
Under Diane's glittering gaze, I quickly filleted it—and she, who'd been watching even this as if it were wondrous, asked me a question.
"What are you making?"
"It’s sashimi. You’ve heard of it, right?"
"I've had it. A chef from the Eastern Kingdoms made it for me. But I didn't know you could make mackerel sashimi."
"Would you like to try it, then, now that you have the chance?"
"Sure."
When I portioned out some sashimi for her onto a plate, she eyed it with fascination and ate a piece.
"Delicious."
Nodding, she finished the mackerel sashimi and then stared intently into the water bucket.
"Which one should we try next?"
"You can eat all of those as sashimi?"
"Yes. It's possible."
She peered closely at the fish in the bucket, then used magic to scoop one out and place it on the cutting board.
Squeak. Squeak-squeak.
The fish that landed on the board puffed up its body and made an odd noise.
As a bonus, when she poked it with her finger, water trickled out of its mouth.
"This one was delicious when I ate it before. The chef that time said something about it..."
"That it'd be so delicious you wouldn't even notice if one of you died eating it?"
"Yeah. That's what he said. Do you know how to prepare this thing?"
"Can’t say I’m an expert. I usually prepare it roughly and detoxify myself afterward."
"I know how to detoxify it too."
Our eyes met.
And although no words passed between us, I immediately raised my sashimi knife.
She was looking at the blowfish with sparkling eyes.
But her expectations were destined to go unfulfilled.
Because just as I was rolling up my sleeves to meet her expectations and fillet this creature, a mana bullet suddenly flew in out of nowhere and sent the fish hurtling over the horizon.
"Ah..."
"..."
Both of us glared in the direction the mana bullet had come from.
There stood the captain—whom Nikolai seemed to have summoned—pale as a sheet, aiming his staff.
*
The moment the ship docked, I called a Bon Voyage Assembly.
Before long, the other members who'd been on the ship all gathered on the deck.
"Hey, I heard you were trying to eat blowfish."
"Yeah."
"You knew how to prepare blowfish too?"
"Nope?"
"Then what the hell were you thinking, trying to eat that?"
"Willpower and mana?"
"..."
"Why are you taking this so seriously? I ate some when I was little and I didn't die."
"Ugh, my head..."
My tongue did go a little numb, but honestly, that was part of the charm.
Leon wasn't the only one pressing his hand to his forehead at my words.
Karl, standing behind Leon; Nikolai and the magical-girl duo, who'd been listening; Pia, who'd come along with Leon for some reason; and even her armored knight—they all smacked their foreheads.
I almost felt aggrieved that among this entire crowd I didn't have a single person on my side, but fortunately, there was one more here who was.
"It's fine. Even if you eat blowfish, you won't die."
Resting a hand on my shoulder, Diane flashed me a thumbs-up with a solemn face.
Maybe it was her words that dealt the finishing blow.
Leon staggered, then collapsed right where he stood.
Leaving Leon there with his knees buckled, I walked over toward Pia.
As for why she was here at Bon Voyage Studio, the answer was "just because."
She'd shown up at the studio with an innocent face and said she wanted to tag along for the shoot.
Leon hadn't told her, and there was no one here who'd leak information, so it was a mystery how she knew—but I'd accepted gladly.
"Didn't get seasick?"
"It wasn't too bad."
"Hey now. Don't lie to my face. Your complexion is pale—what do you mean it wasn't too bad?"
"Ha ha... was it that obvious?"
"Drink this."
She ducked her head and drank from the water bottle I handed her.
Leon's expression as he watched that was awfully close to the look of someone who'd just seen something they really shouldn't have.
Why did his little-sister treatment keep getting harsher by the day?
He had to act hostile toward her in official settings anyway, so wouldn't it be nice if they at least got along in private?
When I relayed those exact words to Leon, he fumed with an expression of cosmic injustice.
"Hey! That's not the point! This fox—"
Thwack.
Pia's textbook-perfect joint lock hit Leon with devastating effect.
She stuffed a handkerchief into his mouth to stifle the scream ready to burst out and apologized to me in his place.
"Mmph! Mmmph!"
"I'm sorry, Allen. My brother's been having trouble sleeping lately, so his nerves are a bit frayed. Despite how this looks, we actually get along well in private, so please don't worry too much."
"Well, seeing as you're the one saying it, I'm sure you two can handle yourselves."
I waved goodbye to Leon as Pia dragged him off helplessly, and we gathered our own filming equipment.
With my hands full of gear, I told the rest of the group, who were each carrying their own gear, what our next destination was.
"I already found out where the Sanctuary is, so we just need to secure lodgings. Any of you know a place near the Sanctuary?"
Shake shake.
This was where the inconveniences of the Middle Ages tripped us up.
Sure, they had communication crystals and maps.
But there was no internet.
So even if you wanted to make a reservation, you couldn't look up a number, and even if you managed to find one, there was no way to know if the place was actually any good.
"And yet it somehow became a tourist destination."
The only ones who found this situation inconvenient were Nicol and me, since we had our past lives as a control group.
"Still, I heard the Duke and his vassal nobles have been separately training locals to be guides. If we ask them, we should be able to find a decent place."
"Why bother asking them? We've got our own local right..."
"Ah, shit."
I had been deliberately not saying that.
As if waiting for the cue, someone tapped my shoulder.
But I resolutely ignored the sensation and moved my feet toward the information center near the harbor.
At that moment, from behind my head, a voice laced with mana reached my ears as an incantation.
"<Stop>."
Her words, uttered unconsciously in a trance state, reflected into reality as they were and pinned my feet to the ground.
It was a neat trick; it felt like only the soles of my feet had been frozen to the floor.
"..."
"I'll handle the guiding."
"You must be tired from filming—"
""
Next to her, as she snapped out of another trance, two fireballs floated up into the air.
"Um... I’m just asking to make sure, but what about the lodgings...?"
"My house."
At her bombshell declaration, Riv Karamzin—the Calamity Duke's eldest son—froze with his cutlery in hand.
"Please, can't you spare me just that one thing?"
The thought of waking up in the morning with a Duke sleeping upstairs made me feel like I'd rather die.
No, before that, I wasn't even sure I'd be able to fall asleep.
"Talk back to me one more time and I'm telling my father."
"..."
"There, let's go."
Her rough psychokinesis lifted me, floor and all, and dragged me away.
I considered resisting, but it was a futile struggle anyway, so I just let my body be carried off.
Leon and Nikolai, watching this scene, whispered to each other.
"Wow. That's the first time I've ever seen Allen get completely bulldozed."
"I never imagined I'd see Boss get shut down so fast, either."
"I can hear you, you bastards."
My desperate efforts proved utterly pointless, and in the end, our lodgings were decided as the Karamzin Duchy.
*
Clatter, clatter.
Under a chandelier that was less dazzling and more searingly bright, the only sound filling the banquet hall was the clinking of cutlery.
In the suffocating silence, the sole keepers of the privilege to speak were the master of the mansion and his bloodline.
"Hm."
As he cut a piece of meat into a small slice and placed it in his mouth, the master of the Karamzin household let out a short murmur.
That alone was enough to make my body, a guest, stiffen rigidly.
"Is the meal not to your liking, perhaps?"
"No, sir. It's delicious."
"Hm."
He resumed his meal.
Unable to tell if the food was going into my mouth or my nose, I just crammed it down my gullet.
Nikolai, who had been watching me act strangely, whispered to me.
"Boss, why are you so tense?"
"...You've never seen a nuclear explosion firsthand, have you."
"Uh..."
I had.
I was someone who had, from a distance, witnessed people evaporating beneath a massive mushroom cloud.
And so, I was confident that I understood the power of a nuclear bomb better than anyone else in this world.
And the middle-aged man in front of me, going "Hm, hm," was the human equivalent of two of those nuclear bombs combined.
How could I not be scared shitless?
Forcing the meat into my stomach, I checked the complexions of my comrades.
Unfortunately, it seemed I was the only one in a serious state here.
While I alone was creaking my joints like a wooden puppet, Diane, who had been cutting her meat next to me, seemed to remember something and paused her meal.
And then, out of the blue, she said—
"Oh, right, Dad. I'm going to be a magical girl."
Freeze.
At her bombshell declaration, the cutlery of the Calamity Duke's eldest son, Mr. Riv Karamzin, stopped.
To be precise, it hadn't just stopped; it was visibly trembling.
The Calamity Duke, ignoring his son's state, swirled his wine glass and answered nonchalantly.
"It suits you."
"The hell."
When I looked toward where the sound came from, there was Diane's older brother, sampling his dessert with perfect composure, as if nothing had happened.
However, the soup splattered everywhere in front of him and his trembling spoon were speaking for his true feelings.
*
Meanwhile, while Diane was having a cozy (if somewhat distorted) family moment with her family, Pia was enjoying her meal in a corner of the dining room.
Normally, as a royal, especially one involved in a succession struggle, one should be cautious of one's every single move, but she was utterly and completely careless.
Not only did she eat the food served to her without a hint of suspicion, but she also treated the Duke without reserve, as if he were an uncle she hadn't seen in a long time.
Even to Leon, a fellow royal, her behavior seemed incredibly immature and thoughtless.
Pia's problems weren't limited to her conduct inside the Duchy.
Before leaving the Academy, she had shown up at the studio unannounced and invited herself on this trip.
During the voyage here on the ship, with a single word about wanting to try fishing, she had troubled the sailors.
And on the journey from the harbor to the mansion, she had openly invoked royal privileges, inconveniencing countless people on the way to the Duchy.
She was wielding her power far too irresponsibly, with no consideration for the fallout she could cause.
Wetting his throat with the wine before him, Leon looked at his naive little sister with disdain.
"Pia. We may be among ourselves here, but it seems to me you're letting your guard down too much."
"It's fine, Brother. I am a princess, after all."
Right after those words, Pia, as if bored, began scraping the bottom of her soup with her fork.
- "Toying with the soup. What a truly distasteful reception."
"What remarkably rude table manners."
- "What a damnably miserly reception."
With those words, Leon handed her a napkin.
- "Was it the will of the Ducal household, or the steward acting alone?"
She divided the napkin into two, left one on the tray, and wiped her mouth with the other.
- "It was the one who served this tray. The Ducal household is uninvolved."
"How was your trip today?"
- "Were they connected to the purpose of this journey?"
"It was excellent. Thanks to it, I was able to spread the name Pia Parma far and wide across this Duchy."
- "Of course. It seems they were drawn in by the commotion I caused."
"I see. How very fortunate."
- "The operation is proceeding smoothly."
"However."
- "However."
"However?"
- "However?"
"There was one thing that I, Pia Parma, the rightful heir to the Empire, found rather displeasing."
- "There's one thing that isn't going quite as expected."
Leon also wiped his mouth with a napkin.
- Leon spat out the poison that had been in the soup.
"Oh? I didn't notice anything."
- "Speak."
"About the fishing on the boat. Perhaps I scattered too much bait, but the fish weren't biting well."
- "The bastards are more cautious than expected. Perhaps they're wary of us."
"There's no such thing as too much bait. You must have lacked patience. Or perhaps the boat was too fast."
- "That's unlikely. Wait just a little longer. We may have moved too quickly."
"I see. Or maybe the surroundings were too noisy. If it's all right with you, I'd like to enjoy the fishing alone next time."
- "Understood. However, just in case, I would like to lure them out alone next time."
"As you wish. Just don't cause too much trouble for the people."
- "Permission granted. Just don't cast the net too wide."
"Thank you, Brother."
- "I shall endeavor to do so, Your Highness."
The two, who had been wiping their mouths, set down their napkins simultaneously.
- "We shall conclude the report here."
"Oh, Brother. I'll go tip the steward, so don't wait up for me."
- "Ah. I'll deal with the steward myself."
Folding their napkins to hide the black stains on them, the two finished their meal.
- There was no need to drag filth into the light, so the two exchanged no further words after that.