Jiaozhou (1)
A few minutes had passed since I picked a suitable spot and settled in to wait.
Just as Zhang Jue had predicted, Lü Bu returned to me before long.
I put the question to Lü Bu, who was carrying herself with some strange, indescribable air.
"So where were you, and what were you doing?"
"Huh? Ah... nothing much."
Though she claimed it was nothing, Lü Bu showed not the slightest intention of explaining what exactly she'd been up to.
Contrary to her hopes, however, I had a fairly good idea what she'd been doing.
...
"Wh-what? Why are you staring at me like that?"
And no wonder — on the Sky Piercer Halberd in her hands, I could make out flecks of blood she hadn't quite managed to wipe clean.
The moment Lü Bu realized where my gaze had landed, she jolted and began stammering in a panic.
"Uh... uh?! What on earth is this?!"
...
"...See, the weapon's color looked a little boring, so I figured I'd give it a fresh coat of paint—"
"Do you honestly think that excuse holds water?"
"Ubbhbhbhb—!"
I seized the cheeks of this teller of ridiculous lies and yanked them hard.
"Be honest with me. What were you doing?"
"Ca-, cah'd say ih—! (I can't say it—!)"
Lü Bu, who normally bent to my will easily enough, seemed to have some wind in her today; even under my interrogation, her lips stayed firmly sealed.
There was exactly one situation in which Lü Bu acted like this.
Whenever she judged that something might, by her own standards, bring me harm, she would flee to the ends of the earth rather than let me hear a word of it.
The Peerless Under Heaven herself, turning her back on me and running away....
Was I supposed to be proud of that?
"You really won't tell me?"
"Ab-, abbolubly nah! (Absolutely not!)"
In any case, I could feel how strong her resolve was — that here, with every eye in the place fixed on us, she simply could not speak — so I let go of her cheeks, which had been stretching out like taffy.
Right. This Lü Bu wasn't someone who would go around cutting down innocent people.
It was my absolute faith that she would never do the things I despised.
Even if Lü Bu sensed I was giving her the deliberate silent treatment, she wouldn't throw a colossal tantrum over it.
She would simply stand rooted to the spot and, just as Seo Yeo once had, burst into tears like a broken faucet.
...Honestly, the mere thought of that scene made my chest twinge with guilt, which was precisely why I had never actually gone through with it.
No matter how hidden-camera the prank, going too far would be a problem, wouldn't it?
Having released Lü Bu's soft, squishy cheeks, I heaved a long sigh and spoke.
"Fine. But you're telling me later, no matter what."
"Y-yeah...."
At my gentle admonishment, Lü Bu nodded, her face flushing red.
The truth was, I already knew the people serving under me were up to things behind my back.
The purple-haired Little Strategist alone — I still remembered how stunned I'd been when I heard she'd once taken spies captive and produced a complete record of the mysteries of the human body....
"By the way, Sima Yi — have you ever tortured anyone before? Why are you so practiced at it?"
Not so long ago.
I had asked her exactly that in a dungeon, while she worked over Ze Rong and his gang with altogether too much expertise.
"Hm? Did I never report it?"
Sima Yi had glanced back over her shoulder at me as she replied.
"Most of the spies locked away in Luoyang right now would know my face on sight."
"..."
"I moved personally to hunt them down, throw them in cells, and pull information out of them. It would be stranger if I weren't used to it."
No wonder every spy who landed in her cells spilled everything in one breath....
To be perfectly honest, I felt in that moment like I'd glimpsed the abyss of a Little Strategist.
Of course, there had been times I worried that operating solo like that might invite a catastrophic accident, but I trusted the abilities and the character of the talents under my command.
Keeping everything under my own control would have been far too Big Brother for my taste — and besides, I lacked the ability to manage it in the first place.
A leader must never mistake her subordinates' talents for her own.
It's a fine thing when a leader is passionate about the work of the state.
But what if that leader is so incompetent that everything they touch turns to ruin?
In that case, well....
People would tell you that the single most helpful thing you could do is sit still and do nothing.
Even so, I'd once been an ordinary soldier, so lending a hand with shovel work or trench maintenance was well within my abilities....
"...Master."
Seo Yeo had clung to my hand and refused to let go.
"Wh-what do you think you're doing right now!! What if you get hurt—!!"
Lü Bu had practically launched herself out of her seat as she shouted.
...Well, odd jobs are odd jobs — once in a while you slip, take a tumble, or scrape yourself.
It wasn't as if I'd never experienced it myself.
"...Master. You'll hurt yourself."
"Did anyone ask for your help?! Those oblivious bastards, I'll...!"
But the reactions of the people nearby were simply too much.
All I'd done was catch sight of a shovel, have old memories come flooding back, and wrap my hand around it once — that was all.
"Okay, okay, I get it. Calm down."
The look in Lü Bu's eyes as she glared at the soldiers had been so alarming that I'd had no choice but to push her aside and remove myself from the scene.
That was the sort of thing I was: a kind of living totem whose duty was fulfilled simply by setting the faction's course and then standing quietly in place.
Hmm... on second thought, perhaps "attachment doll" was the more accurate word than "totem."
Whenever I remembered how they would sometimes cling to me for no reason at all and go completely soft, that seemed like the better fit.
"Lü Bu's back, so let's get moving."
"Yes."
"Understood."
When I signaled that the break was over, Guan Yu and Sun Ce resumed their advance, directing their small escort details.
We seemed to have locked up nearly all the quack doctors by now, which meant all that remained was welcoming whoever would be coming up from the south.
...
Zhang Jue, who traveled in my retinue, was gazing at the slowly sinking sun, sunk deep in some grave thought.
...Her expression looked somehow a touch grim.
Had she sensed an omen of some great calamity to come?
Though I had to wonder whether our faction still had a single calamity left that deserved the name.
How many days had I basked in the rowdy daily life of Jiangdong after that?
"Come on! Just one bout, that's all I'm asking!"
"Hyaaah! This tiger is trying to maul a poor, innocent kitty to death—!!"
I was shaking my head at those two, as lively as ever today without fail, when Liu Bei arrived to make her report.
"General-in-Chief. Envoys from the south have arrived bearing gifts."
"From the south?"
I briefly mulled over who exactly was down south before asking.
"Jiaozhou... no, an envoy come up from the direction of Jiaozhi?"
These regional names were genuinely confusing.
Every other province went by zhou, but this one insisted on being a zhi all by itself.
While I was mulling that over, Liu Bei fielded my question in her usual calm voice.
"Yes. The man calls himself Shi Xin."
Shi Xin... Shi Xin, was it....
As I tilted my head, Zhuge Liang, standing nearby, slipped in a quiet word.
"He is the offspring of Shi Xie, Inspector of Jiaozhi."
"Oh, right, of course."
With Zhuge Liang's explanation, the question mark hanging over my head flipped into an exclamation point.
If my memory served, he would be Shi Xie's eldest son.
Hmm... so he'd come all this way to lay his head before me?
Recalling what attitude the Shi Xie of true history had once shown toward Sun Quan, I gave Liu Bei my answer.
"A precious guest has arrived. See that he's received properly."
"By your command."
Hearing my order, Liu Bei bowed with perfect courtesy and vanished from sight.
The wait was not a long one.
"This subject, Shi Xin! I offer respectful greetings to the honored Gukseo of Han, General-in-Chief of the realm!"
"Er... right, welcome."
He was prostrating himself far more crisply than I'd expected.
In a nation that prized Confucian propriety, greeting etiquette was so elaborate that the morning, noon, and evening salutations each had their own separate forms — and yet Shi Xin bowed with a posture that did not err by a single hair's breadth.
"...Ahem."
Zhuge Liang — who never failed to insist that propriety toward me be observed to the letter — covered her mouth behind her White Feather Fan, satisfaction written all over her face.
That look alone told me exactly how many hours of practice Shi Xin had put into this.
...To be honest, even I, who was in and out of the Imperial Palace constantly, couldn't keep the forms that flawless.
Watching Shi Xin's bearing, I could roughly guess what Shi Xie intended by sending me his eldest son.
"Right. You've come to deliver the Inspector of Jiaozhi's message, haven't you, Shi Xin? What does it say?"
"Yes! It proclaims that we were subjects of Han in days past and remain subjects of Han today, and that we shall spend this one body of ours unsparingly in service of Her Majesty!"
In other words: please don't cut me clean in half and make a Shi/Xie out of me.
No, wait — if the head came off first, wouldn't that make him an S/hi Xie instead?
Traitors who raised their banners against the state were often torn limb from limb, so he could well have ended up as S/h/i/X/i/e.
Well, from where Shi Xie stood, there really was no path open to him other than groveling to me.
Yi Province, Jing Province, Yangzhou.
I had swallowed whole all three regions that bordered Jiaozhou, so he must have felt death breathing right down his neck.
Holding off a single one of them would have been trial enough — with armies bearing down from all three at once, Shi Xie would simply have been crushed flat beneath the sheer difference in bulk.
I had watched plenty of people surrender to me by now, but never one quite like Shi Xie.
Liu Tan, Governor of Yi Province, and Liu Yao, Inspector of Yangzhou, had each been battered by the Nanman and the Shanyue respectively before fleeing behind my back to surrender, and there were plenty more like Gong Ju, Inspector of Ye Province, who only capitulated after I marched over in person for a show of force.
In other words, this was the first time anyone had ever come to me first, of his own initiative, to offer his submission.
If I had to name a comparable case, Cao Cao was the closest thing — and hers was a rather special circumstance....
"...Hm."
"I-is something the matter, my lord?"
"No, nothing at all."
I was simply marveling at the sheer political acumen of the man called Shi Xie.
He'd spared me no end of trouble, so it was only right to cut him some slack in return.
"You've traveled a long way, so rest comfortably today."
I said it with a smile to Shi Xin, whose nerves were plain as day.
"We'll speak of particulars tomorrow."
"...I am humbly grateful for your consideration!"
With Jiaozhou swallowed whole, perhaps it was about time I started thinking about trade routes.
...Jiaozhi, not Jiaozhou, for the moment.
Sooner or later, I'd have to petition Her Majesty and have the name changed.