Inspection Tour (2)
The number of barbarians coming at us was, in a word, just right.
Not too few, not too many — an average-sized bunch.
Since we made a point of deliberately wandering only through remote backwaters wherever we went, the barbarians had swallowed the hook like fish and lined up to lunge at us, one after another.
The behavior of these barbarians, arriving to dig their own graves, followed the same pattern every time.
One of them would sidle closer with a vile smirk.
"Hand over everything you've got!"
And the man who'd swaggered up so boldly would bellow that stock line straight off the page.
"Guaaagh──!!"
The barbarian who declared himself so proudly was always the first to die.
Runner-up favorites included "Forget that guy — why not play with us instead?" and "Kill the men and keep the women!"
Those who said the latter were put down even more painfully. Even I ached just watching.
"Wh-what? I didn't even see anything?"
The barbarians witnessing their comrades die would panic at first, at a complete loss.
After a moment they'd recover and press their advantage of numbers, attacking in force — but there was no chance in the world of getting past Seo Yeo and Lü Bu that way.
Swept away like autumn leaves, only once more than half of them had been cut down did the barbarians finally sense that something was off.
"Run!"
In the end, the handful left — countable on one hand — realized they'd picked the wrong people to trifle with and scattered, tripping over one another in their flight.
I'll grant, watching them wheel their horses with the practiced skill of true steppe riders was fairly impressive — but it availed them nothing against Red Hare.
Hiihihiing—!
Red Hare, boasting speed so overwhelming that a single glance set her worlds apart from any other horse, ran down the fleeing barbarians with ease.
One man's face froze in open horror just before the Sky Piercer Halberd sheared his head from his shoulders.
And so it went, day after day of suppression.
Watching the barbarians slowly stop showing their faces, I nodded with reasonable satisfaction.
"This should just about do it."
Every time we set the trap, a hundred or so would pop out, and we'd smashed quite a few such groups by now.
At this point the rumors would spread whether anyone liked it or not, so it was time to retire the bait.
Which meant it was about time I paid a call on Han Sui, the man who'd failed to deal with these barbarians himself.
I found myself looking forward, just a little, to what excuse he would come up with.
"I can't have misheard, can I?"
At the bewildering report, Han Sui heard himself ask the question right back.
The Qiang deputy who'd delivered it nodded and repeated himself.
"Yes, sir. Word is that a mysterious girl on a red horse has lately been riding about Xiliang, clearing away our nuisances one by one."
"……."
"They say the number of men who've lost their heads to that girl alone has already passed a thousand. Perhaps you ought to summon her and bestow a fitting reward—"
The sight of his subordinate, utterly failing to grasp who this person was, wrung a long sigh from Han Sui.
"You dense fool. You still can't work out who she is?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"Aigoo, you exasperating idiot!"
Frustrated, Han Sui pounded his own chest, thump after thump.
Was the man simple-hearted, or just plain stupid?
These fellows were superb fighters, but when it came to turning a thought over in their heads, they were hopeless.
"Red hair, red eyes, riding a red horse — that was the report, no?!"
"Yes, sir."
"Then who else in the whole world could it be but Lü Bu?!"
The deputy's reply came back laced with doubt.
"But Lady Lü Bu is in Luoyang, is she not? There'd be no reason for her to come looking for us without so much as a message—"
"That's exactly the problem!"
"I beg your pardon?"
That same idiotic blank stare, again!
Watching his man fail to understand a single word, Han Sui felt his chest begin to burn.
"You do know that Lü Bu answers to the General-in-Chief alone, don't you?"
"Does she, sir?"
"……."
I kept this one at my side because he was the only mild-tempered soul among those brutish Qiangs — and now he means to be the death of me, bursting something inside my chest.
After a round of deep, deliberate breathing, Han Sui spoke again.
"……Lü Bu being here means the General-in-Chief has come for some purpose of his own."
"What sort of purpose, for instance?"
"Well now. If he's slipped in without a word of warning, then it could only be a shakedown inspection—"
Han Sui broke off mid-sentence, his eyes flying wide, and shot up from his seat.
"Hey! Get word to Ma Teng this instant — have the soldiers whipped into line and the camp scrubbed spotless inside and out!"
"Yes? Yes, sir…."
"Every moment counts! We must hurry—!"
"General! There's trouble!"
Just then a soldier came dashing into the room.
One look at the man's face told Han Sui the news was urgent; a cold sweat broke over him as he forced the question out.
"Wh-what is it?"
"The General-in-Chief has just entered the city, leading General Lü Bu!"
"……."
The words blurred before his eyes, and for a long moment Han Sui's mind simply went white.
A short while had passed since we took our place before the gates of Wuwei.
"Next…. Whuh—?!"
The soldier who'd been waved over to check our faces turned corpse-pale the moment he got a good look.
What's this? Does he know my face?
While I was still wondering, the man — color entirely drained from his cheeks — murmured something to a soldier who appeared to be his replacement and hurried off somewhere at a run.
No doubt he'd been dispatched to report to his superiors.
Frankly, I hadn't expected to slip into the city unnoticed in the first place.
And if we actually had managed it… well, I'd simply have found one more thing to turn on its head.
The wait was not a long one.
Before much time passed, a man who looked every inch a senior official came sprinting up, gasping for breath.
"General-in-Chief! What brings you all the way out here to Wuwei…?"
"Just wanted to have a look around the city."
"I-is that so!"
The forced smile he wore as he said it made me feel sorrier for him than anything.
I shook my head.
"I won't be needing a guide. Just see me through the gate."
"Of course, of course! I'll handle every formality myself, so please go wherever you please!"
With that, the man snapped to and cleared a path with impressive crispness.
In my past life, the sentry sergeant back at base had been exactly like this whenever we came in through the gate. Not that I was ever much different, mind you.
The memory surfaced out of nowhere, and I set off with a quiet chuckle.
"The security itself seems to be in good order."
Hardly surprising, for the northernmost city in Xiliang, where barbarian incursions were a constant menace.
At my words, Lü Bu — who had been surveying our surroundings — slid her gaze over to me.
"You check each and every one of those?"
"Only whatever happens to catch the eye."
Honestly, who on earth would come up clean if you shook them down to the last coin?
Rather than tear the whole place apart and sift through it piece by piece, my plan was to wander at a leisurely pace and see what problems surfaced on their own.
If something jumped out at me even during a casual stroll, then that was a serious flaw indeed — one that demanded fixing.
With that in mind I made a loose circuit of the city, and the result was that there was remarkably little to find fault with.
The commonfolk weren't laboring under any unreasonable oppression, and nowhere did I catch officials lining their pockets.
I had worried that the barbarians, said to have melded so smoothly with the Han people, might prove a source of trouble — but watching a Qiang man grin ear to ear at a baby cradled in its mother's arms, I somehow couldn't picture it.
They had already come to think of this place as their own home.
Seeing the Qiang so completely woven into the fabric of the Han, I had to admit that Han Sui and Ma Teng were men of genuine ability.
There was no sign of starvation anywhere either — so what in the world were these bandits who kept surfacing all across Xiliang?
It might actually be a far graver problem than I'd assumed.
I headed for the government office to find Han Sui.
"General-in-Chief! Welcome!"
And the moment I approached the office, there stood Han Sui, waiting at the door.
What the—? Don't tell me he's been standing out here the whole time.
"……How long have you been waiting out here?"
"Since the very moment word reached me that you had entered the city, General-in-Chief!"
I had taken my time on the tour, so a good two hours at the least must have passed since then — and he had waited the entire while.
It was a strange feeling, honestly.
This was a commander who truly knew, down to the bone, exactly how to keep a superior in a good mood.
"Let's head in and take our time with it."
"Yes, sir! This way, please!"
Han Sui attended upon me with the deepest courtesy, straining his utmost to keep my spirits pleasant.
Walking along with Han Sui in tow, I spoke up.
"I looked around the city, and there wasn't much I could find fault with."
"Thank you, General-in-Chief!"
"But there was a problem on my way here."
At those words, Han Sui's smile froze solid on his face.
I asked my question slowly.
"The roads were crawling with an extraordinary number of bandits. Can you tell me what in the world is going on?"
At that, Han Sui dropped flat to the floor.
"……I beg your forgiveness! It is all the fruit of my own inadequacy!"
Springing this on me out of nowhere — that caught me off guard. I very nearly let my composure slip.
Do I really come across as some bloodthirsty tyrant who lops off heads on a whim?
"I'll hear you out first, then decide. So stop groveling."
"Th-thank you…."
Watching my face carefully, Han Sui rose slowly from the floor.
"As you well know, General-in-Chief, the rebellion that rose in Xiliang drew the support of many beyond myself."
"That's right."
I remembered plenty of men joining the revolt besides Han Sui and Bian Zhang.
"But some of those men could never shake their old habits, and they've taken a taste for banditry."
"Explain. In detail."
Han Sui bowed himself lower still.
"There is a man who has dug himself in at a place called Jincheng, beyond my own Wuwei, and his outrages grow worse by the day!"
"…Hm."
"When the people try to resist, he terrorizes them, claiming that the General-in-Chief himself stands behind him—"
"Hold on. What did you just say?"
I had the distinct feeling I'd just heard something I was not meant to hear.
Han Sui opened his mouth with great care.
"Yes, General-in-Chief. They drape themselves in your name and work the people however they please."
"……What is this man's name?"
Sensing my darkening mood, Han Sui answered at once.
"Beigong Boyu!"
"I see."
Even without this, word was already flying across the realm that I had kneaded the Emperor like dough to vault straight into the General-in-Chief's seat — and on top of that, these clowns pull a stunt like this?
If they were doing it deliberately to smear my name, I'd almost have to salute the craftsmanship.
But these fools didn't seem to harbor any such design. They were doing it for the simplest reason of all — because they wanted to.
"Han Sui."
"Yes, sir!"
"Ready the soldiers."
"At once!"
Whatever else might be said, these bastards were getting smashed.
Having given my orders to Han Sui, I stepped out of the government office.