He Really Has No Shame, Damn It. (1)
People packed the gates of Mount Hua until there was hardly room to breathe.
“I said don’t push!”
“Hey, you? You’re the one who cut in line, and now you’re blaming other people?”
“Cut in? I’ve been standing here since dawn!”
“Dawn? Dawn, my ass. I’ve been here since last night, taking the night dew on my face! And you stroll up at some lazy hour like you got here early? You’re hopeless!”
“T-there’s no way that’s true! What kind of bluff are you spouting—!”
As the two men started to grab at each other, the people beside them hurried to pull them apart.
“Have you two lost your minds? Do you know where you are, starting a fight here?”
“This is Mount Hua, Mount Hua! Are you trying to get struck by lightning?”
“If you get us all kicked out because of you, I’ll throw you off the cliff myself!”
While sweeping the training ground, Yoon Jong stared at the scene with a dazed face and muttered, “Jo Gul.”
“Yes, Sasuk.”
“Why have all those people come here? And what are all those bundles?”
“No, how can you be the one who’s going to be the next Sect Leader and not know something this basic? Didn’t they come because they heard Mount Hua opened its gates?”
“...All of them?”
“Not that many.... No, well, there are a lot.”
Looking at the endless line stretching beyond the mountain gate, Jo Gul cleared his throat awkwardly.
“If you think about it, it’s not that strange. Even before the closure, Mount Hua always had a lot of visitors.”
“That’s true.”
“Now everyone who hasn’t seen us in three years is coming to pay their respects all at once, so this much is only natural. Besides, Mount Hua’s standing has risen compared to before.”
Even before the sect’s closure, Mount Hua had nearly secured its place as the representative sect of Shaanxi. Then, by stopping the Evil Faction’s invasion this time, it had made that position almost unshakable.
Since the prevailing opinion was that even if Zhongnan opened its gates it wouldn’t be easy to overturn this situation, the influential figures of Shaanxi were all desperate to connect themselves to Mount Hua.
Even outsiders trying to curry favor with the Heavenly Alliance were making the long journey here, so that line was certain to grow longer by the day, not shorter.
“Well, people really do go around doing things...”
Seeing Yoon Jong shake his head, Jo Gul laughed under his breath.
“You, more than anyone else, need to get used to it, Sasuk. When you become Sect Leader, you’re going to be the one dealing with all those people.”
“... ”
Yoon Jong looked at the people crowding Mount Hua’s gates with a tired expression.
Him? All of them?
“No, wait. It won’t just be this many. Right now it’s already like this, so by the time you become Sect Leader, they may well be lined all the way to the foot of Mount Hua.”
“T-that’s a bit much...”
“Come on, that’s only the minimum.”
“The minimum?”
“Of course. By the time you take the position, it’ll be at least twenty or thirty years from now, won’t it? The Sect Leader is still in his prime, and Sasuk is still alive and kicking too.”
“...The way you put that sounds a little strange. But anyway.”
“What do you think that bastard Chung Myung will be like thirty years from now?”
“... ”
Not Mount Hua, but Chung Myung?
“W-what do you mean, what will Chung Myung be like? Thirty years from now...”
Yoon Jong shut his mouth.
“Until recently he was the Mount Hua Divine Dragon, and now he’s the Mount Hua Sword Hyeop. In thirty years, what else would he be? Probably the World’s Number One Plum Blossom Invincible Sword Emperor or something.”
“...A joke is supposed to make the other person laugh too, but the problem is that this doesn’t sound like a joke.”
“It’s not a joke.”
“... ”
“If you have that kind of monster under you and still need to run a sect, Sasuk, you’re going to get one hell of a headache.”
Jo Gul snickered. For the first time, Yoon Jong seriously considered handing the position of Sect Leader over to Jo Gul instead.
“...The Sect Leader really does have a hard lot in life.”
And then, at that moment—
“Mount Hua Diviiine Dragooooon! No, Mount Hua Sword Hyeeeeop! T-there’s trouble, there’s troubleee!”
Someone vaulted over Mount Hua’s gates like a bolt of lightning and shouted at the top of his lungs.
“...And he’ll have to deal with people like that too.”
“Yeah.”
The two men, confirming that it was none other than Hong Dae-gwang—the beggar who had jumped over the gate—shook their heads in unison.
“Maehwado?”
“Y-yes!”
Hong Dae-gwang gulped down the water Hyun Young had prepared, wetting his parched throat before continuing.
“The Namgung Family has occupied Maehwado! Our adorable Thousand-Mile Bluebird flew all the way here to bring the news!”
“...At that point it’s basically animal abuse.”
At the end of the day, it was just a pigeon. So what if its wings were a little blue? They kept making it fly a thousand miles whenever they felt like it. Poor thing.
Chung Myung stared intently at the blue pigeon perched on Hong Dae-gwang’s shoulder, grooming its feathers.
What, does that thing get fed something tasty so it doesn’t fly away even after going a thousand miles? If it were Baek Ah, it’d probably eat two wild boars on the way, lie on its belly to rest, and even have a drink before coming back.
Well... now that was something. Come to think of it, it was awfully useful....
“Ah, no you don’t!”
Hong Dae-gwang yelped and hurriedly cupped both hands around the Thousand-Mile Bluebird on his shoulder.
“What?”
“You’re eyeing our Thousand-Mile Bluebird, aren’t you? This is a spirit beast of the Beggars’ Sect! Absolutely not!”
“Hey, don’t be so stingy. Good things are meant to be shared.”
“I said no!”
“Tsk. Even the Beggars’ Sect has gotten petty. They weren’t like this back in the day.”
“When exactly is this ‘back in the day’ you keep talking about?”
“There was such a time.”
Right. Back then, they weren’t like this.
They’d sneak around with a jar of liquor hidden in their robes, then if they happened to run into him, they’d respectfully offer it with both hands and insist on giving it to him even after he said he didn’t need it. Tsk tsk. These days, they really were...
“No, forget that.”
Hyun Young cut the whole thing off and asked again.
“You mean the Namgung Family drove off the water bandits and took over Maehwado?”
“Yes. That’s right, Elder. The Beggars’ Sect disciples confirmed it on the Yangtze, and the Thousand-Mile Bluebird flew straight back with the news. It’s fresh from the main branch—our very first report to reach us.”
“Hmm. The Namgung Family...”
Hyun Young looked over at Hyun Jong with a distinctly displeased expression.
“Things are starting to look serious, Sect Leader.”
“...Indeed. To think the Namgung Family would...”
While Hyun Jong and Hyun Young spoke, Hong Dae-gwang shot Chung Myung a fresh glance.
What kind of bastard is this, anyway?
With things turning out like this, he was honestly dumbfounded.
Before this even happened, Chung Myung had come to him and asked about the Namgung Family’s movements. When no one else—Beggars’ Sect included—had even considered Namgung as a variable, this brat had been sitting all the way out in Shaanxi, seeing straight through what would happen on the Yangtze.
Can just being smart even explain that?
He had thought he knew enough about Chung Myung by now, but the more he learned about this strange Taoist brat, the harder he was to predict.
“Hey, Hong Branch Leader.”
“Yes, Sect Leader.”
Hong Dae-gwang snapped back to attention and looked at Hyun Jong. It would be rude to be thinking of other things in front of a sect leader—especially Mount Hua’s Sect Leader.
“What does the Beggars’ Sect think about this? The Four Hegemons Alliance won’t just sit still, I imagine.”
“The Beggars’ Sect has also been keeping a close eye on the movements along the Yangtze.”
Hong Dae-gwang swallowed hard.
“But it’s difficult to predict exactly what will happen next. As you know, there are so many variables...”
In a conventional war, the flow is not actually that difficult to predict. Even if the number of participants grows, the ones actually directing the army are still only a handful of people.
But the wars of the martial world were a different beast entirely.
Every sect had its own distinct character, and each formed an independent power, so orders didn’t always take root easily. That was why the course of a conflict often ended up shaped in ways the planners had never expected.
Even this time, who had seriously expected the Namgung Family—the same family that had stayed quiet for three years—to hear the news and rush all the way to the Yangtze to beat the water bandits senseless? No one.... Well, almost no one.
“So the Beggars’ Sect also asked for Mount Hua’s opinion.”
“Our opinion?”
“Yes.”
Hong Dae-gwang’s eyes flicked sideways.
Hyun Jong caught that glance and smiled bitterly. So that was why the Beggars’ Sect, who were unrivaled when it came to information, had specifically come asking Mount Hua’s opinion.
It’s that brat Chung Myung.
He must have said something to Hong Dae-gwang to investigate the situation on the Yangtze, and that message had properly made its way here.
“Chung Myung.”
“Yes?”
“What do you think that Four Hegemons Alliance will do?”
“Well...”
Chung Myung shrugged carelessly.
“That depends on Jang Il-so’s mood.”
“W-well, yes.”
It was true, though utterly useless.
“But honestly, that part doesn’t matter much.”
“And what do you mean by that?”
Chung Myung grinned.
“The Four Hegemons Alliance itself is a given. It’s obvious as hell what those bastards are going to do now.”
“Then?”
“The variables are those bastards over there. The bald bastard and the horse-nose bastard.”
“B-bald...”
Of course, the bald bastard meant Shaolin, and the horse-nose bastard meant Wudang.
“First, we need to see what that horse-nose bastard does.”
Chung Myung snickered.
“Even if they’ve shut their gates, it’s not like they’ve sealed off their ears too. If they hear that the Namgung Family is out there smashing the evil bastards, they’re definitely going to start boiling over.”
“...Yes, that certainly seems likely.”
Right now, the people most desperate to recover their honor were none other than Wudang. No matter how much the Namgung Family had trembled with shame over the Yangtze massacre, could that shame and rage compare to Wudang’s?
“If it were me, I’d’ve opened the gates and run straight to the Yangtze this instant.... But unfortunately, their Sect Leader is Heo Do.”
Chung Myung scratched his cheek.
Heo Do-jin-in’s thoughts were so easy to predict that they were, paradoxically, hard to predict.
“And even more important than that is the bald bastard....”
“Hmm.”
Hye Yeon, seated in the corner, let out a groan.
But Chung Myung cleanly ignored Hye Yeon’s reaction and went on.
“What that guy does will change things a lot.”
“What do you think he’ll do?”
“...You want my guess?”
“Yes. Your guess.”
“If it were me...”
Chung Myung made a strange face.
“I think I know.”
“Yes.”
“I’d rather he didn’t. If a person has even the smallest shred of shame, he shouldn’t do it. But that bastard doesn’t have any shame, so I’m pretty sure he will.”
“A-and what exactly does that mean?”
“That’s hard to explain, but if I’m right, then by now...”
And then—
“Sect Leader!”
Bang!
Unam burst through the door in a hurry. His face had gone slightly pale.
“What is it?”
Hyun Jong, sensing that something serious had happened, asked at once. Unam opened his mouth with an alarmed expression.
But—
“Right now!”
“...Huh?”
Before Unam could finish, someone else cut in first. Everyone’s eyes turned to the one who had spoken: Chung Myung.
“At the mountain gate.”
“... ”
“The Abbot of Shaolin has come.”
“... ”
“Right?”
Unam stared blankly at him as if he’d run into a ghost, then nodded in a daze.
“H-how did you know? I was about to come running to tell you myself.”
“Ha.”
Chung Myung gave a short laugh and looked up at the ceiling.
“Damn, he really has no shame. A beggar would have more dignity than that. That rotten bald bastard. A monk with all that money, and he’s worse than a beggar.”
Hye Yeon, seated in the corner, turned red as a plum blossom.