Why Are You Acting Like That? (2)
"Don’t move! Anyone who moves is the culprit!"
"...What the hell is he talking about?"
"Please, try to understand. It’s not like he’s only been like this for a day or two."
Baek Cheon let out a long sigh as he watched Chung Myung hiss like a venom-drunk viper.
Behind Chung Myung’s back was a sack of Purple Wood Grass. The moment they returned to the Southern Barbarian Beast Palace, he’d snatched it away and was now acting as if it were his sacred duty to guard it.
"So cute. Adorable, really."
"Please don’t say things like that even as a joke. He’ll think you’re serious."
Jo Gul shuddered, and Baek Cheon snorted with amusement.
Of course, Chung Myung’s current state was absurd enough to make anyone blink twice, but...
It’s not exactly hard to understand.
Just because they had gotten their hands on it more easily than expected didn’t make the Purple Wood Grass any less important. That grass was necessary to make the Honwon Dan, and only when the Honwon Dan could be refined would Mount Hua be able to restore its former glory.
To Mount Hua, that sack of Purple Wood Grass was worth more than gold. It was only natural that Chung Myung was on edge.
"If it’s that important, then we shouldn’t just leave it here and keep watch over it. We should get back to Mount Hua as quickly as possible."
Chung Myung nodded.
"This dragged on way longer than expected. I bet the elders’ necks have stretched at least an inch by now."
"...?"
Baek Cheon, suddenly imagining the elders with elongated necks, quickly shook his head to fling the wicked image away.
Yes, the journey really had gone on far longer than expected.
Who would have thought that getting hold of a handful of weeds would involve so many twists and turns?
Thinking of it that way made the sack of Purple Wood Grass feel even more precious to Baek Cheon.
He turned to the other disciples and asked, "Are you all ready to leave?"
"There’s not much to prepare, honestly. We don’t have much luggage."
"Mm, that’s true."
He nodded quietly, then lowered his voice a little as he looked back at Chung Myung.
"Then let’s waste no more time and go offer our respects to Palace Lord Maeng before leaving. He’s shown us great kindness, so we should properly thank him."
"Mm, that’s right."
Chung Myung nodded.
As much as he would have preferred to skip the farewell altogether and head straight for Shaanxi, it was necessary to maintain a good relationship with the palace lord.
Because the Purple Wood Grass is basically a hostage now.
Chung Myung’s brow furrowed slightly.
The more he thought about it, the more he had to admit the Beast Palace Lord was a smart man. He had given them Purple Wood Grass—something that meant little to him—thereby winning Mount Hua’s favor, and had even set up fields of it around the Divine Pond, laying the groundwork for a continuing relationship.
Of course, it was a gain for Mount Hua as well. They had secured the Purple Wood Grass with relative ease, and with it, a future supply route too.
At that moment, Yoon Jong and Jo Gul quietly approached Chung Myung.
"What? Don’t come any closer!"
"We’re not stealing it, you idiot! We’re Mount Hua disciples too!"
Jo Gul shouted in indignation, while Yoon Jong spoke with a faintly serious expression.
"Chung Myung."
"Hm?"
"I have something I’d like to discuss with you for a moment."
"Hm?"
Surprised by his earnest tone, Chung Myung tilted his head.
"Why are we the ones who have to do that?"
His voice rose sharply. Yoon Jong, on the other hand, seemed perfectly calm, as though he had expected this reaction.
"No, think about it carefully."
"We’re not the ones blocking caravans to Yunnan and stopping them from going! If they don’t want to do it, why the hell should we be the ones to convince them?"
"There are many reasons."
"Let me guess, you’re going to say people are starving again, right? Senior brother Yoon Jong. Senior brother Yoon Jong, that’s not something we should be sticking our noses into. I mean, sure, I feel bad too. But there are things we can do and things we can’t, right?"
"No, it’s not only for that reason."
At that point, Jo Gul, who had been listening quietly beside them, waved a hand and joined in.
"Chung Myung. If senior brother were just trying to do something out of pity, I would’ve stopped him before the words even reached you. But if you think about it, this isn’t such a simple matter."
Chung Myung narrowed his eyes slightly.
"Then?"
"It makes money."
"Huh?"
"Money!"
Jo Gul’s eyes gleamed.
At the mention of money, Chung Myung looked at the two of them with a strange expression.
"So, in other words..."
"Let me expla—"
But before Jo Gul could even begin, Chung Myung cut him off and rattled it all off himself.
"Since Yunnan’s food situation looks bad, if we buy food and trade it for Yunnan tea and sell that, we can make a ton of money?"
"Uh..."
"Of course, there are already small-scale trading routes, but that alone isn’t enough to meet demand. So if we get control of Yunnan’s tea trade rights, we could make money on the same scale as the ten biggest merchant houses in the Central Plains?"
"...?"
"And since my senior brother’s family could handle the operation, we’d be killing two birds with one stone? Is that what you’re saying?"
Jo Gul stared at Chung Myung, dumbfounded.
"...You’d already been thinking about it?"
"Do you take me for an idiot?"
"Yeah."
"What?"
"Ah, no."
Chung Myung snorted.
"I get what Senior Brother’s thinking, but that’s the kind of answer you give when you know one thing and nothing else. What matters to us isn’t making money in Yunnan. What matters is keeping a good relationship with the Beast Palace."
"...?"
"There’s no need to go out of our way and do something the other side hates just because we think it’s for their own good. Money? Sure, it matters. But in this world, there are things more important than money."
Yoon Jong and Jo Gul stared at him blankly.
Then they exchanged a glance.
He said he’d go crazy if we brought up money.
We all thought so too! Who’d have expected those words to come out of that money-obsessed demon’s mouth?
Chung Myung looked at the two of them like they were hopeless.
"So stop thinking nonsense and pack your stuff."
"...Ugh."
Yoon Jong bowed his head with a groan.
"Then could we at least get in there by one degree?"
"Huh."
Chung Myung gave him a clearly displeased look. But Yoon Jong didn’t seem willing to back down so easily.
"The Beast Palace Lord seems to care quite a bit about you. He might listen to what you say. In truth, the reason the Beast Palace is blocking tea trade with the Central Plains is because they dislike Central Plains people. If you personally stepped in, it might work out well for both sides."
Chung Myung’s brow furrowed a little.
Come to think of it, it wasn’t entirely wrong...
After a moment’s thought, he finally spoke.
"Fine. I’ll only poke my nose in that far."
"Yes. I won’t ask for anything more."
"But in return!"
"Hm?"
Chung Myung grinned.
"You two need to prepare something for me."
"Hm?"
"Nothing big."
Chung Myung’s grin widened.
"Just a set of clothes that’ll make the negotiation go a little smoother."
Unease settled on Yoon Jong and Jo Gul’s faces.
"...?"
Baek Cheon stared at Chung Myung with a dazed expression.
"Th-that..."
"What?"
"...No."
His gaze swept from the top of Chung Myung’s head to the tips of his toes.
"Why are you like this?"
"So, what’s wrong with me?"
"Ughhh."
Baek Cheon let out a deep sigh.
Chung Myung was wearing a blue scholar’s robe and holding a fan made of pure white tail feathers in one hand.
He looked vaguely like Zhuge Liang, but something about the workmanship was so crude that the whole outfit failed to carry the look.
Chung Myung fanned his face twice with the shabby white feather fan, then puffed his chest out with obvious satisfaction.
"If you’re going to negotiate in Yunnan, you should dress the part."
Watching him walk around with his hands clasped behind his back, chuckling in a way that was somehow completely unlike him, Baek Cheon eventually scrunched up his face and turned away.
But the moment he turned, he saw something even worse.
"What the hell are you two wearing?"
"...?"
Yoon Jong and Jo Gul wordlessly wiped the moisture from the corners of their eyes with their sleeves.
In truth, the white feather fan in Chung Myung’s hand hadn’t been bought anywhere. It had been made personally by those two.
Chung Myung had demanded the scholar’s robe and fan, and the two of them—unable to bring themselves to go all the way to Kunming’s shops—had gone into the forest and run themselves ragged chasing after birds with long tail feathers.
They had been scratched by branches, covered in plant rash, and slashed half to death by bird claws, ending up a complete mess.
That damned bastard.
He’s worse than a dog would bite.
Still, they had somehow succeeded in making a decent-looking fan before their deadline. The tear-soaked result was now in Chung Myung’s hand.
"Hah. History always repeats itself! At this point, they’ll listen to me on their own, right? Kekekekekek."
Seeing Chung Myung laugh all by himself, Baek Cheon spoke in a grave tone.
"...Listen carefully, all of you."
"Yes, Uncle-Master."
"This stays absolutely secret once we return to the Central Plains. If the Zhuge family finds out, they might come after us with swords in hand."
"...Understood."
The Mount Hua disciples let out one sigh after another.
Whether they did or didn’t, Chung Myung seemed pleased with his outfit. He spread his arms left and right and cleared his throat with a smug "ahem."
"All right, now let’s go see the pal—"
Just then—
"Are you inside?"
"Hm?"
At the voice from outside, Chung Myung opened the door. A Beast Palace attendant was standing there, waiting respectfully.
"The palace lord requests your presence, Daoist Chung Myung."
"Huh?"
Chung Myung tilted his head.
"Why?"
"I do not know the reason. He asked that you come to his chambers when you have time."
"Really?"
Chung Myung nodded.
He had been wondering how to go see him anyway, so this was actually convenient.
"Then I’ll go."
"Umm..."
"Don’t worry. I’ll handle it well. I used to be called Zhuge Chung Myung, you know."
"...Zhuge Chung Myung my ass."
"Ahem!"
Watching Chung Myung stroll away with his hands behind his back, Baek Cheon spoke with a stiff face.
"You lot."
"Yes, senior brother!"
"Pack your things."
"Pardon?"
"Keep your bags in your hands at all times so you can run at any moment."
"...Yes, senior brother."
Baek Cheon looked after Chung Myung with deep, lingering anxiety.
Please, let’s not cause trouble. Chung Myung.
Please.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇
"You came?"
"Yes. Did anything happen last night?"
"What could have happened... But why are you dressed like that?"
"I thought I’d make a little effort."
"Hahahahahahahaha! Look at you, you really do look like some kind of scholar!"
"Right? Hehe!"
Chung Myung spread his arms slightly and trotted forward to sit down across from the Beast Palace Lord.
"You called for me, so I came."
"Mm, yes. I had something I wanted to ask you."
"Yes, go ahead."
The Beast Palace Lord fixed Chung Myung with those fiercely glaring eyes of his.
"It feels a bit strange to say this myself, but the Beast Palace has been very accommodating to Mount Hua, hasn’t it?"
"Khh, we’re truly grateful."
That much was sincere.
The Plum Blossom Sword Saint might have been the hero of Yunnan in the past, but treating and considering his descendants so generously was by no means an easy thing to do.
So he had no choice but to be grateful.
Then the Beast Palace Lord, uncharacteristically a little awkward, opened his mouth.
"I’m not saying this only because of that, but..."
"Yes?"
Seeing that imposing face turn uncomfortable made Chung Myung feel oddly squirmy himself.
"I have a request."
"A request?"
"Yes."
The Beast Palace Lord exhaled slowly and looked at Chung Myung.
"This is a request from the Beast Palace to Mount Hua, and from me, Maeng So..."
"Wait a second."
"Hm?"
"Your name is Maeng So?"
"Yes."
"So as in 'small'?"
The Beast Palace Lord nodded.
"I was so tiny when I was born that my father apparently gave me that name."
"...?"
No.
What exactly did you go through while growing up after being that tiny at birth to end up looking like this?
Did you eat Ink-Scaled Blood Python porridge or something as baby food?
"Ahem, in any case!"
Maeng So continued with a slightly embarrassed face.
"This is also a request from me, Maeng So, to the Daoist Chung Myung of Mount Hua."
Chung Myung straightened his back.
If it had come this far, it meant this was something serious. When someone had shown you kindness, it was only right to treat them accordingly. Uncharacteristically, Chung Myung’s face hardened.
"Go ahead."
"The thing is..."
Maeng So seemed to choose his words several times, then finally let out a long sigh.
"I know it’s a difficult request, but... could Mount Hua perhaps step in directly and handle trade with Yunnan?"
"...Huh?"
"Trade..."
"Yes?"
"Tea trade..."
"...Pardon?"
"Of course, I know it’s not easy."
Chung Myung stared back at him in a daze.
"You want Mount Hua to do tea trade?"
"That’s right."
"Mount Hua?"
"Indeed."
"...?"
Chung Myung looked at Maeng So with utter disbelief.
No, why are you the one acting like that?
That’s supposed to be what I was asking for.
How the hell did things get twisted like this?