Chapter 136: NO. 136 Hanazono Room (1)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 136: NO. 136 Hanazono Room (1)
The daughter, who had been wandering after losing her father, returned home.
The wife and mother, who had lost her husband, reclaimed the daughter she was on the verge of losing.
Time flowed around the two women who had found their happiness again, and before long, the season had turned into the scorching peak of summer.
Today, as usual, Irene, Helena, and I were radiating a terrifying chill in the kitchen of my mansion.
“Young Master, I’ve bought up all the highest quality milk from the nearby ranches.”
“Good. Irene, what about the sugar?”
“I brought everything that came into the Magic Tower.”
“Perfect. Now, let the 35th experiment begin.”
As any quick-witted person might have guessed, the experiment we were currently pouring our hearts and souls into was the recreation of ice cream.
While certain aspects had developed uniquely thanks to the existence and advancement of magic, the current era of the Empire wasn't much different from the medieval period.
In other words, the only way to endure the summer heat was with things like lukewarm ale.
Of course, thanks to inexhaustible magic power and spells, one could keep their surroundings pleasant or make a lukewarm beer cold enough to elicit a refreshing "Ahhh!!" with just a snap of the fingers...
Even so, one cannot become an omnipotent being.
To put it simply, you cannot create 1 from 0; you cannot create something from nothing.
“Leon, I’ve finished cooling the milk after evaporating the moisture.”
“Young Master, the fruit juice concentrates and other toppings to be added to the ice cream are ready.”
“Good. Then... first, let’s remake the sherbet and shaved ice we made last time. The Duke’s daughter and the former Ardrin upstairs have placed an order.”
Helena swung her sword at ultra-high speed, instantly grinding a block of milk ice the size of a person.
Irene then topped the milk shaved ice Helena created with fruit juice that had been boiled down and concentrated several times, along with various toppings, completing the otherworldly version of bingsu.
As for the serving...
“Oh! Is it finished? Give it to me! I shall deliver it to Valeria and Andrasta myself!”
“Don't eat it all by yourself on the way, Sitri.”
“I know, I know. Honestly, what do you take me for?”
“The Great Demon of Shaved Ice.”
“Fufufu, that has a nice ring to it! Shaved ice is a wonderful civilization!”
After entrusting the serving to Sitri, I returned to the kitchen.
Why was I making such a fuss about creating ice cream all of a sudden?
It was simple.
Now that my martial fame was known throughout the Empire, I needed to spread a fresh and novel kind of reputation.
Everything was for the sake of laying Empress Alexandra down in my aesthetic room—my spiderweb and my hunting ground.
If the Emperor is the father of the nation, the Empress is the mother.
The Mother of the Nation is the woman who stands at the pinnacle of all women in the land.
To invite such a woman to my hunting ground, the "specialness" that can only be enjoyed there is an absolute necessity... however.
“Hmm... this won't do either. The texture is too coarse. We need to simmer it more to evaporate the moisture completely.”
“As you said, the texture of this ice cream with the moisture completely removed is fine... but the flavor is weak. It’s decent, but 'decent' won't satisfy the Empress’s palate, let alone Lady Valeria or Lady Andrasta...”
The recreation of ice cream was currently hitting a major snag.
Unfortunately, in my past life, I was a liberal arts major.
The only thing I knew how to cook was ramen; far from knowing how to make ice cream, I was the type who just ate it endlessly.
Well... it wasn't like we were failing every time. We had easily succeeded in recreating the shaved ice that Andrasta and Valeria just ordered, but...
“How on earth can I make this vanilla ice cream?”
In fact, shaved ice or sherbet made by grinding ice or frozen milk would have been enough.
The Empire was a country with a very frugal and restrained national character, in both good and bad ways.
Consequently, the dessert culture of grinding down subordinates' labor to create delicacies hadn't really developed.
That was why Valeria had guaranteed that even the Emperor or Empress had likely never tasted this shaved ice... but I couldn't be satisfied.
There were limits to what sherbet or shaved ice could do.
To fully unleash the infinite 31 possibilities of ice cream, vanilla ice cream—the base of all ice creams—was indispensable.
It was just a hunch... but the Empress I saw seemed to be very, very greedy.
Almost as much as I, who still feels hunger even after spending passionate nights with six women.
Thus, I was throwing in every spice from inside and outside the Empire and squeezing the cows in the nearby ranches dry, but.
“Ugh, ptui. What did you put in this, Helena?”
“Ah, that... I don't quite remember either. I believe it was... mushrooms...”
“Let’s... leave out all types of mushrooms.”
“Yes, Young Master. To be honest, I didn't put them in because I wanted to...”
“What about Irene?”
“I... well... I'm sorry...”
“There’s nothing to be sorry about...”
As such, the situation was desperate.
Desperate enough that even Helena, who knew her way around a kitchen, felt forced to put mushrooms in frozen milk.
Desperate enough that even Irene, who was a master of alchemy—a field synonymous with cooking—couldn't find a breakthrough.
The day we would reach vanilla ice cream was far, far away...
“Lena~ Could you make me just one more bowl of this shaved ice~?”
“Yes, Sister. But... I gave you quite a lot, have you finished it already...?”
“Fufufu, actually, I shared it with Armin. And... no matter how much I eat now, I don't gain weight, do I?”
“That is true... but as a Sword Saint and a noblewoman, you should show some restraint...”
“A realm built on asceticism is predictable. If you want to get stronger, you have to eat and eat again! Oh, and put more toppings on this time.”
“That... sigh, yes...”
Unlike me, who was lost in worry, Natalia went out to the garden carrying another mountain of shaved ice.
No matter how I looked at it, it didn't seem like all of that would fit in her stomach... I wasn't the only one transcending humanity, it seemed.
“Phew, let’s call it a day. Good work, everyone.”
As a sign of gratitude and reward, I filled Helena’s and Irene’s wombs with my cream.
Did that seem like a bit of a leap?
I just wasn't in the mood for anything else right now...
Anyway, as soon as the experiment was wrapped up, someone appeared, screaming ungracefully.
“Mom!!!! I told you! Don't meet that bastard!”
“Oh my, Merlin. What is with that language? Your father and I didn't raise you to be so unrefined. Fix that vulgar way of speaking immediately.”
“Ugh...!”
Ah, come to think of it, there was Merlin.
Seeing Merlin barge into my mansion and scream her head off again today, a thought occurred to me.
Since I’ve been feeling a bit down lately, maybe I should refresh my mood with an elf mother-daughter bowl...
*
Any red-blooded man living in 21st-century Korea would have seen this kind of work.
An actress who stops all movement as if time has frozen at the words, "Time Stop!"
The setting is, of course, a swimming pool.
It’s the so-called time stop genre.
Ironically, the point to watch in the time stop genre isn't the situation of frozen time itself.
The main point of appreciation in the time stop genre is the actress's expression.
The fact that time is stopped means, in other words, there should be no reaction to any stimulus.
But since time hasn't actually stopped, the actress has to act out the situation.
Blinking might be overlooked, but shedding tears or making a sound of breath is an immediate NG.
'The erotic point of the time stop genre lies right here...'
No matter how much the male actor licks and sucks, no matter how much he rummages and probes, even if he stimulates an erogenous zone that makes her leak just by touching it, the actress must maintain a blank expression.
No matter how much she feels, she must pretend not to.
But even the most professional actress is human in the end.
When will this woman give up her acting?
When will this woman break down!
To repeat, the true value of the time stop genre lies in this precarious boundary and the moment that boundary collapses.
“...It’s a bit much for me, the Great Demon of Lust, to say this, but Leon... you...”
“What, what is it?”
“No, never mind...”
“You still love me, though, right?”
“Fufu, you’re stating the obvious.”
“Hahaha.”
It was a moment when I was sharing such thoughts and conversation while strolling through the night garden with Sitri.
As if someone had jumped over the wall, the sound of feet hitting the ground echoed with a whoosh.
Of course, our Great Demon...
“How dare you!”
To protect her precious, precious final contractor, she extended her long red claws.
I hugged the somewhat overprotective Demon Maman and soothed her gently.
“Now, now. Calm down and wait for me in the bedroom. I’ll dote on you plenty later. Okay?”
“Urgh... Haa, fine. Come back quickly, Leon.”
“Yes, Mother~”
“Pfft...”
Once I sent Sitri back to the bedroom, the uninvited guest immediately revealed herself before me.
“...Is she gone?”
“Yeah. Hmm, there’s no need to be so scared. The more you see her, the more cute and lovely she is.”
“Hmph.”
The uninvited guest snorting as if it were none of her business was Merlin.
She was the one who told me to stay away from her mother, yet here she was, seeking me out on her own today.
As for the reason she came...
“I told you! Stay away from my mom! You said you would!”
“Well, I don't think I ever said that. And what can I do when Irene comes to see me every day, saying she misses me?”
“Then kick her out!”
“I can't do that. I have a duty to welcome precious guests when they visit. I am a noble, after all. Besides, turning away an Archmage Marshal is something even the Emperor couldn't do.”
“You...!”
Seeing Merlin huffing and puffing at me was quite~ cute.
So much so that I reflexively wanted to shout, "Time Stop!"
Oh, good. Let’s go with this this time!
While I was thinking that for a moment, Merlin took a step toward me.
“Don't touch my mom! Anyone else might be okay, but not you! No, nobody should get close to her!”
“Why? Irene loves me, and I love Irene. Falling in love isn't a crime, is it?”
“You’re a philanderer!”
“A philanderer? Father isn't such a scoundrel who touches just any woman, my dear daughter.”
“If you flap your mouth like that one more time...!”
“Hahaha.”
As I’ve said before, I’m not the kind of person who likes just any woman.
Rather, I’m closer to a very, very picky gourmet.
That’s why my women are happy to be mine.
...Well, I made them that way, though.
Anyway... whether I was thinking that or not, Merlin raised her voice again, screaming her head off.
“Don't meet my mom! Don't touch her! You trashy con artist bastard!”
Still, this was getting too noisy.
Like a noble who never loses his dignity and elegance, I brought my index finger to my lips.
“Your voice.”
“Mmph...!”
“Don't raise your voice so high, Merlin.”
Man... I get goosebumps every time I recite this line.
It feels like the eighth-grader syndrome I’d forgotten is flaring up again.
Pressing Merlin down with my Spiritual Pressure like this, I took a step toward her this time.
“...”
“Haha, no need to glare so fiercely. I won't do anything.”
Not yet.
Releasing the Spiritual Pressure that had silenced Merlin, I continued the conversation.
“I want to continue my relationship with Irene, but you wish for me not to. What should we do about this...”
“Right. Don't think you can talk your way out of this. I have no intention of backing down.”
“Hmm~ But I think there’s room for negotiation. Oh, how about this?”
“...What.”
In any case, Merlin knew all too well.
She knew that with the power she possessed, she couldn't stop a single hair on my head no matter what she did.
So... if I said I’d play at her level...
“Let’s make a bet. If you win, I’ll cleanly end my relationship with Irene. In exchange, if I win... you know what happens, right?”
“...Fine. You’ll keep seeing my mom.”
“No. That’s something I’m already doing, so I’d gain nothing even if I won the bet. Right?”
“Ha... just say what you want to say. What is it?”
“It’s simple. If I win, you become my woman too. Hmm... saying 'become my woman' is a bit unrefined. Oh, how about you and I also become a couple in love?”
“What? Are you crazy?”
“If you don't like it, then don't. You’re the one who’s desperate, not me.”
“You... you son of a bitch...!”
Merlin’s psychology was obvious.
Just as her only father was her deceased father, Irene’s only loved one should be her deceased husband.
Therefore, Merlin had no choice but to accept this condition.
She had no way to deal with me head-on, but with a bet, there was at least a possibility.
“...Fine, I’ll do it. But I’ll decide the method of the bet.”
“No? I’m going to decide.”
“You really! Hey!”
“What.”
“Ugh, fuck... I’m seriously so pissed... I want to kill you...”
As I said before, Merlin was the desperate one, not me.
I was just using the advantage I had to make Merlin fall into the illusion of, 'Maybe there’s a chance...?'
“Haha, don't be so scared. At least it’s not the kind of bet you’re thinking of.”
“What...?”
“It’s honestly embarrassing to say it myself, but I am the Lion King Leon, renowned as the strongest warrior and knight of the era. Plus, as you know, I’m a mage superior to even an Archmage. It would be my loss if I beat you with strength or magic. A bet should be fair, shouldn't it?”
“...So. What is it you want to say?”
“Hmm~ Let’s talk about that when we meet tomorrow afternoon. It’s late now. Hurry home, your mother will worry. It’s time for good children to go to bed~”
“Ah! Seriously, I’m so pissed! This is so annoying!”
“Get home safely~ my dear daughter~”
“Drop dead!”
“Hahaha.”
With that, Merlin hopped over the wall just as she had come.
Geez, what would her late father say if he saw his daughter using his legacy to jump over someone else’s wall?
I couldn't help but chuckle as I walked back into the mansion.
Merlin didn't know, but Irene was waiting for me in my bedroom today as well.
“Hehehe...”