I Want to Get Out of the Skeleton Forest (3)
“Aaaaaargh!!!” Woong— “Aaaaaagh!!!” Woong— “Kyaaaaagh!!!” Woong—
The skeleton swung its sword and my body flew sideways in a bizarre, repeating dance. Every missed strike only smashed the innocent piles of bones behind me.
“Ughhh…” I seized the opening and dove behind the nearest bone pile.
“Phew…” The creature swiveled its head, scanning for me.
‘Figures. The stronger the attack, the more forceful the dodge…’
After a few exchanges I’d figured out a couple of things about the Emergency Dodge Maneuver.
‘One. Just like Momo said, the optimal path includes my survival.’
The skill was dodging with my continued existence in mind. When the skeleton had tried to take my head off earlier, it hadn’t simply snapped my neck backward; it had twisted my waist and torso so the blade would miss.
‘As long as it’s not an absolute worst-case scenario, I probably won’t die.’
Now that I’d confirmed it, I was using the skeleton to run a few experiments.
‘This must be what Momo intended.’
People learn best through their own bodies and minds. No matter how much someone lectures you, if you don’t experience it yourself the lesson never really sticks. …And yes, I’m exactly the same way.
‘Two. It uses the absolute minimum movement necessary.’
Wide-area attacks left no choice, but for ordinary downward cuts my body would simply pivot so the sword whistled right past my nose.
‘At first I nearly pissed myself…’
Now I was almost getting used to blades flying at my face.
‘And three, building on the last point—the bigger the attack, the more power the dodge applies.’
I didn’t understand the principle, but every time the skill triggered an unidentified force took over my center of gravity and hurled me out of harm’s way. The strength scaled with the opponent’s power and range. A heavy, sweeping strike sent me flying like a ragdoll, while weaker ones only needed a slight twist.
‘That’s about it for now…’
I organized everything I’d learned and double-checked the plan.
‘Good. Still within expected parameters.’
Luckily the “method” I’d come up with at the beginning seemed perfectly viable.
‘Then…’
I slipped behind the mountain of bones, keeping out of the skeleton’s sight while I searched for the perfect spot.
Clatter!!—
The instant I poked my head out, it spotted me and charged.
“Shit!”
I sprinted for the location I’d scouted earlier, but—
“Urk!”
It was angry now; its speed had doubled.
Clatter!!!—
The gap between us shrank fast. My lungs burned.
“Huff… huff…”
Boom!
The sword must have swung; my body lurched forward and I tumbled. The blade, denied its target, shattered the floor and sent shards flying.
Woong—
“Ack!”
My body automatically rolled to dodge the ricocheting fragments, which bought me a little more distance.
“Ugh…”
I scrambled up before the skill could fling me around again.
‘Just a little farther…!’
One more stretch and I’d reach the spot for my plan.
Clatter!!—
My exhausted legs refused to obey. Meanwhile the tireless skeleton radiated bloodlust, sword raised high as it closed in.
‘Damn it…’
I grabbed my trembling thighs and forced myself upright. That was the limit—my legs had officially gone on strike.
‘Just a few more steps…!’
I measured the distance. One good leap and I’d make it.
“Fuck…”
But my body wouldn’t listen.
“Momo…”
‘Wait, I’m seriously going to die here?’
“NO!!!!!”
Clatter?
“I don’t want to die here! I don’t want to die here, damn it!!!!!”
My scream made both Momo and the skeleton flinch.
“Aaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!”
I roared, wringing out the last of my strength, and charged straight at the bewildered skeleton.
Clatter!—
It recovered instantly and swung its sword in a huge arc.
Woong—
The Emergency Dodge Maneuver moved my body perfectly. Passing by the skeleton wasn’t an option, and both flanks were blocked by the shattered floor fragments.
‘Then the only path left is… one…!’
Because of the wide swing, a single route remained—and the skill yanked me toward it with monstrous force.
“Grrrrk!!!”
An invisible power dragged me backward. The speed kept accelerating.
I flew straight into the colossal mountain of bones behind me.
Rumble—
The enormous pile that had barely been balanced slammed into me at full speed and began to collapse with a deafening roar.
Clatter?—
Krrrrrrraaaaaaaaash—
The avalanche of bones swallowed both me and the pursuing skeleton.
‘Perfect… exactly as planned!’
I’d originally meant to lure it in and time the collapse myself, but—
‘Well, it collapsed. Mission accomplished, right?’
“Obviously!”
“R-right…”
“…Obviously.”
Clatter!!!—
The mountain thundered as it came down. The skeleton disappeared beneath the crushing weight.
I calmly stepped out of the danger zone.
Woong—
Thanks to the Emergency Dodge Maneuver I escaped without a scratch.
Rumbleeeeeeeee—
The entire bone mountain collapsed. Dust choked the air.
“Cough, cough—ow, there’s so much dust…”
“Yeah… cough, cough…”
I covered my mouth with one hand and waved the other to clear a path, stumbling forward.
“Stop.”
A low, heavy voice rang out. Something cold pressed against my throat.
“Huh…?”
I rolled my eyes down. Instead of the rusty blade I’d been dodging, a gleaming blue edge rested against my neck.
“Hands up.”
I slowly raised both arms above my head.
“Name and affiliation.”
“Um… my name is Lee Siwoo…”
“Affiliation. Where did you come from? How did you get here?”
“Well… you probably won’t believe me, but I’m a hero summoned from another world…”
“…”
No reaction.
‘Yeah… even I have to admit it sounds ridiculous.’
“Walk forward. Slowly.”
I obeyed, letting the stranger lead me.
“This place is…”
“Kneel.”
He guided me into what looked like his living quarters. I dropped to my knees, hands still raised like a criminal awaiting punishment.
“So… you claim to be a hero?”
The red-haired stranger looked me over, suspicion thick in his voice.
“Probably…”
“What do you mean, probably?”
“I mean…”
“Enough. Answer only what I ask.”
“Yes…”
His crimson eyes narrowed. He spoke slowly.
“How did you enter this sanctuary?”
“Uh… I fell from above…”
His gaze sharpened dangerously.
“N-no, that’s not the whole story—”
I hurriedly spilled everything: the summoning, the chuunibyou introduction, the underground prison, all of it.
“So in short… you’re an idiot who talked nonsense trying to look cool and fell down here?”
“That’s… um… yeah…”
His eyes now carried the distinct look of someone staring at a pathetic creature.
“So… may I ask who you are, sir?”
I cautiously lifted my head. He glared.
“How dare you look me in the eye while speaking?”
He fetched a cloth and began wiping his sword, never taking his eyes off me. I quickly lowered my gaze. A sigh came from above.
“Vampire?”
“What did you say!!!!!”
The stranger had been sitting in a nearby chair watching me; suddenly the sword was at my throat again.
“You… how did you know what I am?”
“W-well…”
“Nosferatu…?”
“You!!! How dare you utter that name!!!!!”
“That’s not—”
“Give me one good reason or I’ll take your head. Five… four…”
“Aaaaah!!! H-he’s a friend of that person…!”
Cold sweat poured down my back as I babbled.
“Friend…? What kind of nonsense—”
“Momotani Himeko! …He said you’d understand if I mentioned her!”
The moment I spoke her name the stranger slowly lowered his sword and stepped back.
“…Who are you? What is your connection to the Blood Crimson Swordswoman?”
“Blood Crimson Swordswoman? Who’s that?”
“…? Are you truly ignorant? Momotani Himeko, the Second Hero, was known as the Blood Crimson Inspector or the Blood Crimson Oni. Did you not just speak her name?”
“Huh? For real?”
I lowered my head, trembling with excitement.
“That sounds so badass!!!!! Give me a cool title like that too!”
I grabbed the red Oni mask fixed to my head and shook it, eyes sparkling.
“Is she… sealed inside that mask?”
The stranger had moved beside me. He held one side of the mask, firing questions rapidly.
“Mother spoke of you often. She said she had no idea how shocked she was when you suddenly vanished…”
“But why Blood Crimson Inspector? Red blood? Is there a deeper meaning?”
“Have you been here the entire time? If only my body were in better condition, I could have searched this place myself…!”
“Right! How did you know he was a vampire? Does it have something to do with the title?”
“Are you truly the Blood Crimson Oni? Ah, I’m not doubting you… I’m simply a cautious person…”
“Do heroes always get awesome names like that? Then maybe I could also—”
“…”
“…?”
When I suddenly fell silent, the stranger gave me a puzzled look.
We realized we’d been standing the whole time. Momo calmed us and made us take seats.
“…Let’s sit.”
“Yes…”
I sat across from the stranger at the table in his hideout. He seemed slightly embarrassed by his earlier outburst.
“So… you really can hear Lady Blood Crimson Swordswoman’s voice.”
“You can’t hear her?”
“Gilles de Rais.”
“Sorry?”
“Vlad Gilles de Rais. That is my name.”
“Ah… like I said before, I’m Lee Siwoo…”
“Family name?”
“…? Lee.”
“Understood. Lee Siwoo.”
“…?”
“No, just Siwoo is fine…”
“Hmm? Then… Siwoo Lee Siwoo?”