Trap Card Activated (3)
Go to hell.
Laughter spilled out of my mouth.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew I should probably stop laughing, but I was past the point of restraint. The snickers just kept leaking out, one after another, and there was nothing I could do to hold them back.
Since I was being surrounded by people who were trying to comfort me and fuss over me, I’d intended to keep it together. Instead, I kept twitching with suppressed laughter.
“I-it looks like he’s having a seizure. Priests, keep chanting. M-mages, please check whether there’s any runaway mana in his body.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Thanks to Lee Jihye covering for me by saying I was having a fit, I had no choice but to grab at the arm clinging to me and roll around once more.
Kasugano Yuno, who had somehow approached as well, was pacing nearby with a flustered expression.
Truthfully, there was no reason to keep hanging around here.
My body was already recovering, and rather than becoming a spectacle for the crowd, it would be far better to rest in the comfort of my own room.
The reason I was still putting on this little performance was obvious.
We’re the victims, you bastards!
I wanted to say.
Of course, the person putting on the most convincing show in this entire room was none other than Jung Hayan.
“Waaaaaah, Oppa! H-huuuuuuuhh….”
“It’s okay….”
“Huuuuuuh….”
She was pouring out tears and snot in equal measure, and just looking at her made my chest ache.
For Jung Hayan, all of this was one hundred percent real.
The man she adored more than anything had almost died the moment he took the filthy fiend’s hand and let out a scream of agony, so of course she was in tears. Anyone who saw her would assume I’d already slipped away to some hidden corner and died in secret.
She was crying so pitifully that a few noble ladies, weak of heart and rich in sympathy, were even dabbing at their own damp eyes.
I had already given Kasugano Yuno a heads-up beforehand, but even for her this was probably an unfamiliar sight, because she was looking at me with tears quietly gathering in her eyes.
My role was finished as long as I looked like I was in a little pain.
Still, there was no need to overdo the act on the floor.
Lee Jihye seemed to think the same thing, because I could feel that she wanted to settle the mood and move things along.
That was when Cha Heera hoisted me up over her shoulder.
That worked too.
She didn’t seem to care much about the blood soaking through my body and clothes.
In an instant her own body was smeared with it, but to the noble ladies and aristocrats of the Holy Empire, she looked nothing short of beautiful.
For this one moment, this scene would be more entertaining than any work of literature.
Being carried on her back, broad even for a woman, gave me the distinct impression that I was actually being protected.
Without having to touch her all over, I could tell how solid she was.
This wasn’t the uselessly overbuilt sort of bulk Park Deokgu had. Her muscles were compressed to perfect density.
Thinking about Ito Souta getting hit full force by the monstrous fist that body could throw made me laugh all over again.
It’s impressive he didn’t die.
He must have thrown up every scrap of defense he had the instant it landed.
Even so, the fact that he was coughing up blood meant he’d suffered a fatal injury of his own.
To be blunt, I figured Ito Souta had taken at least twice the damage I had.
We hurried out of the banquet hall a little too quickly.
Jung Hayan was still trailing after us, wiping away tears as she came, while Lee Jihye stayed behind to keep talking, probably because she thought she should calm the room down.
Now that she’d confirmed I was safe, she must have decided it was more useful to stay and keep working the crowd.
I was a little disappointed, but that was exactly like Lee Jihye.
And it was in my favor, too….
In any case, the Lee Kiyoung Express was moving full speed ahead.
It was barreling toward the comfort of a private hospital room without so much as a stumble.
The moment we arrived, Cha Heera laid me out on the bed, and her expression still looked grim.
Even while the priests came rushing in and the treatment began once more, I could barely suppress my laughter.
With Jung Hayan standing back and watching me from a distance, Cha Heera quietly spoke.
“How is he?”
“He seems to be much better, Lady Cha Heera. If he rests now, I don’t think there will be any further complications.”
“Good work. You can all leave now.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Second, you go out too.”
“I don’t want to….”
“Hayan, there’s a letter in the second drawer in Oppa’s room. Go take it to the shaman for me now.”
“O-Oppa… h-huuuu….”
“My body’s fine, so you should listen to Oppa, right?”
“Y-yes….”
“You can change your clothes and wash up, too. I’m really fine now. Deliver that first, and then we can stay together again. All right? Tell Kasugano Yuno I’m fine, too.”
“Yes. Yes….”
I wasn’t sure why Cha Heera had ordered Jung Hayan out as well, but I, too, would very much have liked her to leave the room for a while.
The errand she absolutely had to run was the perfect excuse.
I felt a little bad seeing her with tears still brimming in her eyes, but I couldn’t exactly burst out laughing in front of that worried expression.
The priests had already hurried out, and Jung Hayan, after a little reluctant hesitation, was slowly making her way out of the hospital room.
Only then did I finally let out the laughter I’d been holding in.
“Puhihahahahahaha!”
“……”
“Pwahhhhehahahah! Cough!”
“……”
I was laughing so hard I started coughing. Cha Heera watched me without saying a word.
“Feels like ten years’ worth of indigestion just dropped right out of my gut. Noona, did you see Ito Souta’s face? Cough. Puhuhut.”
“……”
“It was even more perfect than I expected. Seriously… actually, it would’ve been best if he’d managed to dodge your fist there, but that ended up being a little disappointing. If he’d been beaten to death there, things would’ve been a lot easier. No, come to think of it, it’s a relief he’s still alive. I’ve still got a lot of gifts prepared for him, and he can’t die before he gets them. You held back too, right? Or was that bastard just too quick? Hah. Either way, it was fine. Cough.”
While I kept laughing, Cha Heera’s expression began to change little by little.
I couldn’t explain why, but for some reason I couldn’t shake the feeling that she was irritated.
What’s wrong with her?
Of course I had to read the room.
There was even a trace of anger on Cha Heera’s face. After staying silent for a long while, she finally opened her mouth again.
“Jagi.”
“Yeah?”
“Do you think this is funny?”
What’s got into her now?
“I’m asking if you think this is funny, you bastard. You do realize Ito Souta and all that crap aside, you almost fucking died just now, right?”
“I didn’t die….”
“Cut the bullshit about ‘it’s fine because you didn’t die.’ If we’d been a little later, you really could’ve died. You might’ve even spent the rest of your life crippled. If I hadn’t cut off your arm….”
“That’s why I told you I trusted you, Noona.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about your attitude. I’ve seen plenty of crazy bastards in my life, but you’re the first one this insane, you bastard. I’ve seen people gamble with their lives before, sure, but you’re the first one who laughs while doing it. Do you want to die that badly?”
“No….”
“If you want to die, just say so anytime. I’ll beat you to death myself.”
“Why are you like this, Noona?”
Something felt very unlike her.
I’d expected Cha Heera to laugh along with me at the perfection of the setup, so I was just as thrown off as anyone.
But when I saw her lower lip bitten tight, I could roughly guess why she was reacting like this.
Hah….
I had never imagined the Mercenary Queen would make a face like that.
Could she seriously…?
I’d considered the possibility that Cha Heera might actually be falling for me, but I still had to shake my head at it.
No matter how hard I tried to picture it, I couldn’t see her hanging on my neck like that.
I was a little confused, but there was no denying she’d been worried about me.
No, as she herself had said, it was true that she liked me. However you looked at it, that counted as a green light.
“Were you worried?”
“Shut up….”
When I lightly brushed her face, her mouth fell quiet, and the expression on her face became clear at a glance.
“Don’t worry, Noona.”
“You….”
“It’s because you were there. That’s why I could laugh. I never once thought you’d make a mistake. I wasn’t gambling my life. I was certain I wouldn’t die.”
“You….”
“Thanks, Heera.”
With the one arm that still barely obeyed me, I took her face in my hand and pulled her slightly closer. Ridiculously enough, her body came with it. I brought my lips to hers quietly, and I could feel her shaking all over.
She’s nervous.
I could barely believe it myself, but Cha Heera was definitely nervous right now.
Of course, that only lasted a moment; the way she immediately started chewing me out afterward made me certain that half of my guess had been right.
Even the way she squeezed my injured arm was something to behold. Perhaps thinking I might lunge at her, she let out a short cry.
“Ah!”
“S-sorry.”
“It’s fine, Heera Noona.”
This reaction was new, too.
She probably realized even she had done something out of character, because she looked a little embarrassed. I caught her desperately trying to change the subject.
“A-anyway, I’m glad it worked out as you planned.”
“Yeah. This is enough. The situation’s been turned around for good.”
“You do have another plan, right? We did go ahead and swing at them the way you said, but everyone’s going to be wondering what secret you know. They’ll want to know why Ito Souta tried to kill you. If you don’t have solid proof, he might get off without much trouble.”
“I know that. The Holy Empire hates conflict.”
“Executing the master of a major guild is definitely a tricky matter, too… and if you think about the fact that the Papal Office is backing the Yamato Guild, then maybe in about a week he could reappear at a gathering like nothing happened.”
“Don’t worry. I’m only telling you this, Noona, but I’ve got something else in the works.”
“What?”
“The errand I sent Hayan on just now is related to that, too.”
She looked deeply curious.
I did wonder whether it might be better to keep my mouth shut, but it would come out eventually anyway.
Revealing it a little early wasn’t going to ruin the plan.
For her, it would probably sound like a completely random piece of news.
“I’ve started flooding Japan with potions.”
“What?”
“Blue has been distributing potions into Japan through Kasugano Yuno. Officially, of course, the shaman and Blue will take the position that they have nothing to do with the potions… and the truth people will come to believe is that a new Japanese clan is developing and distributing them.”
“You… you bastard….”
“Of course, rumors will also spread that the real mastermind behind using that new clan to distribute the potions is Ito Souta. Right now, while the procedures are tying him up, this is the perfect time for media play. Naturally, we won’t be spreading the rumors directly from our side. I’ve got a fair number of safety nets in place. The truth will be revealed little by little… and that will eventually tighten around his neck.”
“You do know Ito Souta has a good image with the nobles, not just the pope, right, Jagi?”
“That’s exactly why it’s better, Noona. People don’t care much when a villain commits crimes. In fact, if his image is good, he becomes easier to handle. If I had to guess, by the time Ito Souta shows his face in high society again, public opinion against him will already be beyond repair. I can wreck his image to the point where he can’t recover.”
“……”
“Do you know what these kinds of people enjoy most in the world?”
“What…?”
“Talking behind other people’s backs.”
Cha Heera’s face, clearly thrown off balance, came into view.