The Ponytail Girl Is Too Strong (1)
The Ponytail Girl Is Too Strong (1)
The plan is simple.
Stall for as long as possible inside the clearing, and get friendly with the Ponytail Girl.
Unlike the other cowards, the Ponytail Girl doesn't leave this clearing even though she's more than strong enough.
I don't know why. Maybe she's really trying to hit one hundred thousand sword swings for some hidden piece, or maybe she has some noble cause about protecting the weak.
But that doesn't matter.
What matters is that she knows how to handle a sword.
"And so, the Lord God created this Tower. To punish foolish humanity."
The fairy was rambling about something, but my gaze was fixed solely on the Ponytail Girl in the corner.
The Ponytail Girl was gently stroking the scabbard of her sword, her eyes cool but tinged with unease.
"...What is it?"
As I stared at her, something felt off. Like I'd seen something that shouldn't have been there.
Like... I was missing an important detail...
"Alright, that's enough background. Now, take whatever catches your eye..."
Done with the explanation, the fairy dropped a heap of weapons in the middle of the clearing.
"Ah."
I realized what was off.
The fairy hasn't even handed out weapons yet—so why does that woman already have a sword?
When the Tower summoned me, I only had whatever I was carrying at the time.
Clothes, my wallet, a rice burger coupon stuffed in my pocket. I'd left my phone by my pillow to charge, but when the Tower summoned me, it was gone without a trace.
Meaning, only the items you were carrying at the exact moment of summoning count...
Which means that woman is a certified lunatic who was walking around with a sword in the real world too.
"...Wait. Let me rethink this."
This is actually good.
To carry a real sword in the real world... you need a weapons permit? A sword permit?
Anyway, I've heard you need the government's permission to possess a real sword.
I don't know the details, but that process is probably a huge pain in the ass... and despite all that, a young woman is carrying a real sword?
It's reasonable to assume she's someone professionally trained with a blade.
Meaning, she's not just good at swordsmanship because of a Tower trait she got after arriving.
My decision to learn swordsmanship from her was correct.
And so, I kept watching the Ponytail Girl for a long while.
"Status Windoooooow!"
This is the critical moment.
How will she react while most people are shouting for their Status Window?
The Ponytail Girl was generally light on emotional expression, so reading her face was incredibly difficult. But I was so completely focused on her expression that I barely managed to catch it.
First, confusion.
Her eyes widen slightly, as if she wants to say, "Really?"
Then, deliberation.
Her gaze drops low, and the hand gripping the scabbard tightens.
Finally, resolve.
Looking a little embarrassed, she moves to the edge of the clearing and her lips move in a small mumble.
Probably said "Status Window".
Right after that—
"!!!"
The Ponytail Girl's eyes go wide.
She looks around her, clearly startled.
"...What?"
That's a pretty surprising reaction from the usually cold Ponytail Girl.
What did she even see in her Status Window to make her jolt like that?
No, more importantly, are other people's Status Windows even the same as mine?
Maybe they don't just have a trait like I do—maybe they have stats, a shop, all sorts of different features.
Could be that I'm just missing all that because I paid for it with the cheat ability of regression.
That stray thought made my head spin.
The instant I lost sight of the Ponytail Girl—
"Hey."
"...Yes?"
I heard a cold woman's voice from behind me.
No way. It can't be.
Praying it wasn't, I slowly turned my head.
Smack!
Along with a fierce impact, my vision was forcibly jerked about eighty degrees.
"You perverted bastard."
The Ponytail Girl dusted off her hands and walked back to her spot.
Did... did I just get slapped? I was dumbfounded.
I ran my tongue across my teeth and tasted blood in my mouth.
Wait, blood?
[You have taken damage.]
[Regressing to the moment you first entered Floor 0.]
***
"Fuck! Where am I!"
"Fuck..."
I swore the moment I woke up.
Why did I get hit? Did I look like a pervert? I have absolutely no idea.
Through all my regressions so far, I've never been slapped like this.
Okay, let's think rationally.
There must be a difference between then and now. Something changed, so the Ponytail Girl's reaction changed too.
The only difference between then and now... is that I observed her obsessively...
"Ah."
The great cat Schrödinger once said,
'Merely the act of observation can change the outcome.'
It occurred to me that maybe, I got slapped precisely because I watched her too intently.
"...Let's test it."
The foundation of experimentation is repetition.
And time is something I have in spades.
**
After roughly six regressions, I could finally be certain.
The Ponytail Girl did hit me because I was blatantly staring. When I played in the dirt instead, she didn't come over to hit me.
But the key point is that she only ever noticed me staring after she checked her Status Window.
So what the hell is her trait?
Something like heightened senses? A trait she has to activate in her Status Window?
I decided to run one more experiment.
The current timeline is the moment when people have started forming small groups and leaving the clearing.
The firefighter hasn't left yet, and the Ponytail Girl is diligently swinging her sword.
I cautiously watched my step and moved.
"Hello?"
The person I approached was the Short-haired Girl I'd seen before. Her face was cute, and she'd stuck in my memory because she'd once asked me if I had anything to eat.
"...Can I help you?"
The Short-haired Girl looked a little guarded. Like she suspected me.
"Ah, it's nothing much. I just had something to say."
Sorry to the Short-haired Girl, but you're going to be my test subject.
She was positioned at the exact opposite end of the space from where the Ponytail Girl was swinging her sword. The furthest possible spot.
"It's important, so... could you lean in a bit?"
"...It really is important, right?"
Hesitant, she cautiously tilted her ear toward me.
I whispered in a very quiet voice.
"I'm quite fond of your chest."
"...Excuse me?"
The Short-haired Girl's mouth fell open, as if she couldn't believe what she'd just heard.
"And your hips look like the childbearing type. You'd give birth well."
The most vulgar sexual harassment I could possibly muster.
Just before the horrified Short-haired Girl could scream—
Wham!
"Gyaaahk!"
Along with a violent impact, my body floated through the air and slammed into the bushes.
My back hurts like a son of a bitch. I can't feel my toes.
I turned just my head to look back, and the Ponytail Girl was slowly lowering her fully extended leg.
"...For trash like you, even my sword would be a luxury."
Her face was filled with utter contempt.
[You have taken damage.]
[Regressing to the moment you first entered Floor 0.]
***
"...Would've been nice if it killed me faster."
My back still stings. Is this phantom pain?
After taking a direct hit, I'm starting to think Death Regression might not be such a great ability.
Getting kicked is this painful—if I actually died, the aftereffects would be a total mess.
"But now I know for sure."
My voice was so quiet that not just a regular person, but even a beast with good hearing couldn't have caught it.
And we were pretty far apart.
But the Ponytail Girl flew over in an instant, kicked me flying, and cursed me as trash.
Meaning, from that distance, she heard what I said to the Short-haired Girl.
Which means what, exactly?
It means that after checking her Status Window, the Ponytail Girl can perceive every movement in this clearing.
All while endlessly swinging a sword, no less.
I don't know what rank her trait is, but it has to be at least SS-rank, right? Showing off a monstrous ability like that the moment you enter the Tower.
But the mystery is solved.
The reason the Ponytail Girl cut me down when I asked her to teach me swordsmanship.
She knew all along that I was putting on an act.
She could've been monitoring my every move that whole time, so she probably already knew I wasn't some model young man sacrificing himself for others.
Thinking about it that way, getting rejected isn't unreasonable.
Whack!
I hit my shoulder hard, as if to punish myself.
[You have taken damage.]
[Regressing to the moment you first entered Floor 0.]
***
This time, I didn't look at the Ponytail Girl. I listened intently to the fairy's explanation too. I had to be a damn good actor.
<Tutorial Stage>
-Clear Condition 1: Swallow a 'Golden Orb' hidden somewhere in the forest to proceed to the next stage. Only 50 Golden Orbs exist.
-Clear Condition 2: Defeat the Boss, Goblin Shaman, and a portal allowing passage to the next stage will be generated.
Now, while everyone's reading the notice and a brief silence settles, this is my chance.
Clap, clap!
"Everyone!"
I stood up and clapped a couple of times to draw their attention.
"My name is Kim Jun-ho! Everyone, please lend me your ears for just a moment!"
Ponytail Girl.
So you like nice guys, is that it?
Then in this run, I'll be the nicest guy you've ever met.