Chapter 21
Chapter 21
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 21
Chapter Title: The Fingers
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Six years ago, on the very day Lena had been summoned to her father's study, she was dragged off again. There was no time to bid farewell to the household or pack her things. She was bundled into a strange carriage as if kidnapped, and for nearly ten days afterward, she traveled without knowing their destination. Not knowing where they were going or how long it would take left Lena tormented by anxiety day after day. She was no better off than a beast caught in a trap.
That's why she cried so much during the carriage ride. She cried and cried, on and on until it felt like she would dry up and die. Her tears finally stopped flowing endlessly around the time they arrived at the Southern Duke's castle.
Lena, who had been gripped by extreme fear, ended up with an empty heart, slumping like a doll with its strings cut.
It might be better to just die, she thought. She had no means to escape and no courage to face reality, so wouldn't that be preferable? Resigning herself brought a strange relief to her crumbling mind.
But even so, when she saw that bizarre rift, tears poured out once more.
"Welcome. This is the path I prepared for you."
The man who had brought her here spoke in front of the rift.
A crack in the empty air. Within it, a red sky and black earth writhed like a nightmare, things Lena had never seen before in her life.
"Don't be too scared."
The man's voice—Clavis's—was gentle even amid all this. That made it seem all the more insane.
"Have you ever seen a Wraith before?"
Clavis asked, stroking Lena's head. She shook her head, trembling violently. Wraiths were something that existed in the South. Or occasionally appeared in the North. That was all she had ever overheard from adults.
"I see, you haven't. Corpses pile up day by day outside the cities, but you've been safe in the mansion, dressed in pretty clothes and eating cake, so you haven't seen them yet?"
Clavis whispered mockingly. Lena's heart sank once more.
"It's okay. I'm not blaming you. That's your blessing. It's only natural for someone born with good fortune to live in luxury."
Clavis comforted the sobbing Lena. But it wasn't truly for her sake. What he really wanted to say was something else.
"Don't look for a reason, just like you enjoyed things without reason. Bear it, even if it hurts, even if it feels like dying. That's how everyone lives."
With those words, Clavis kissed Lena's forehead. Then he grabbed her frozen wrist and pulled.
"Come on, stop crying and let's go."
Where? Lena asked silently. Clavis noticed her pitiful expression and smiled brightly.
"That place you see is the land of the Wraiths. It's what His Imperial Majesty discovered—a hell from our perspective. I sent a lot of friends there out of curiosity, but none have come back."
Clavis pushed Lena's back, his voice excited.
"So I matched the conditions. I thought maybe it needs a girl raised delicately like the Emperor. It's a bit sad to think even hell discriminates by status."
He said it was sad, but Clavis's eyes looked delighted.
"If you return safely, you'll be as great as the Emperor. Of course, you might not."
Clavis spoke irresponsibly as he shoved her. Lena desperately stepped back. One might think his heart would soften at the sight, but Clavis smiled innocently and dragged her along. And in the end, he pushed her into the abyss with a farewell.
"Then I'll wait. You can get revenge if you want, but please come back."
That was it. With that whisper as the last thing she heard, Lena fell. Into an endlessly deep and low place. There, she confronted an unfamiliar world. Just as the Emperor had long ago.
***
The day after Founding Day, the Southern Duke was in a foul mood from early morning.
"Did you sleep well last night, Your Grace?"
"It doesn't seem like it. Your expression looks poor, Gramps."
"It's rude, Young Lady. His Grace always has that face."
"Ah, well..."
When the young maid expressed her regret with sad eyes, the Southern Duke finally snapped, unable to hold back.
"Do you think my face is like this because of whom?"
"Surely not because of me?"
At Lena's innocent question, the Southern Duke squeezed his eyes shut and let out a long breath. It was the morning after Founding Day. The moment dawn broke, he had summoned Lena because of the blunder she committed the day before.
"Do you know what wrong you did yesterday, Lady?"
"The Eastern Duke?"
"You do know!"
The Southern Duke bellowed, but Lena and Uni didn't even flinch. That drove him even madder. Yesterday, in front of everyone, Lena had bowed her head to the Eastern Duke. She approached him first like fawning on a superior, introduced herself, and even expressed thanks. All actions unfit for the South's representative.
"Once you don the South's uniform, you are the South, and the South is you. Even if you're ignorant, how can you bow so casually!"
"It was just a thank you for the help."
When Lena explained calmly, the Southern Duke nearly shouted again. But she added first.
"You would have been badly hurt if it weren't for the Eastern Duke."
Not me, you. At Lena's silent accusation, the Southern Duke was speechless. His face twisted like someone choking. He was already going mad over the arrogant Eastern Duke saving him. That bastard, of all people—why?
As the Southern Duke grew confused, Lena asked with innocent eyes.
"Receiving help in front of everyone and ignoring it would seem rude. I thought upholding basic etiquette was a matter of dignity. Did I err?"
Her voice was so fragile as she asked. The Southern Duke ground his teeth, unaccustomed to seeing his executioner like this.
"If you had to greet him, you could have done it quietly."
"Then why bother greeting at all."
"Uni, shh."
When the old man stubbornly insisted, Uni, who had been listening quietly, grumbled. Lena hurriedly stopped her, but the Southern Duke had heard clearly. His face flushed red. In truth, wasn't that little one just a ventriloquist dummy Lena carried to provoke enemies? He suspiciously entertained the near-delusional thought and swallowed his anger. Watching him, Lena felt a bit sorry. In fact, she had stepped in yesterday purely to help Rin. Claiming it was for the South's dignity was a half-hearted excuse, but the rigid Southern Duke took it seriously. Sensing the old man's inner conflict, Lena's conscience pricked her, and she belatedly soothed him.
"I know what worries you. I fell short as the South's representative. I'll be more careful from now on."
"You talk well."
"I was just saying...!"
As expected, Uni jumped in, but fortunately, Lena's hand was quicker than Uni's mouth this time. Covering Uni's mouth, Lena whispered, "Uni, shh." At the young lady's plea, Uni reluctantly shut up, and seeing her frustration, the Southern Duke finally relaxed. Confirming his mood had improved, Lena casually added.
"Actually, the best thing is to avoid such situations from the start."
"Hm?"
"No need for thanks if no help is needed."
The Southern Duke raised an eyebrow at Lena. His face said, what are you suddenly on about? She carefully broached the main point.
"In that vein, may I ask what's happened to the Southern Knights? Where are all those who joined the Silent War?"
At Lena's question, the Southern Duke sighed deeply.
"...Nothing's as fierce as the aftermath of war."
He muttered like someone forcing out unwelcome words. In truth, it was a talk that had to happen anyway. But uncomfortable exposing weakness, he had delayed—now, with her asking directly, he couldn't avoid it.
"Those you know are handling postwar matters across the South."
After a great fire, ashes remain. Extinguishing flames is desperate struggle; rising from ashes is grueling penance. Likewise, the postwar period was as brutal as the war. Repairing crumbled castles, guiding exhausted populace, devising survival—all required capable hands, not amateurs. Thus, the Southern Duke dispatched his wartime aides across the South. The valiant Southern Knights scattered, and to fill the voids, he assembled a new order with fresh faces.
"So this side is filled with green rookies, is that it?"
"Green rookies—shortened to greenhorns."
"Ahem...!"
At the tandem remark from Lena and Uni, the Southern Duke coughed awkwardly. "Greenhorns" stung, but undeniable, worsening his pain.
"So that's what you meant by grasp the situation first."
"Still, all from notable noble houses."
The Southern Duke muttered defensively and beckoned his secretary nearby. The secretary handed Lena a prepared report.
"This is?"
"The Knights' roster. Better than endless talk—see for yourself. I already ordered a meet-and-greet; you'll see them this afternoon."
Lena flipped through the report with Uni. It listed knights' names, ages, families—all scions of well-known houses, as the Southern Duke said. But Lena focused less on origins, more on birth order.
"'Third son of a count, second son of a viscount, another second, fourth over here...'"
Mostly second or third sons, or later. One firstborn caught her eye. Curious, she checked and burst out laughing.
"Count Pieta must have been precocious from childhood."
At Lena's jest, the Southern Duke quietly pressed his forehead. By Lena's knowledge, Count Pieta of the South was early thirties, still young. Yet his firstborn on the list was twenty-two. Unless the count started heirs at ten, this firstborn was adopted.
"Now I get the picture."
A knightly order of noble seconds, thirds, and adoptees. Lena understood the implication and smiled bitterly.
"They're the discard pile, these men."
The South endured precarious, ravaged days from war's aftermath. Yet the Emperor commanded conquests of the dukes, South included. No choice, they formed a new knightly order. To minimize burden while showing imperial fealty required tricky selection.
"Imperial decree demands notable nobles, but no hope of return—so spare heirs, send seconds or thirds. Adoptees if needed."
Lena's analysis darkened the Southern Duke's face further. Exactly as she said. Ruthless loyalty demand sparked noble backlash; this compromise was the result. Seeing the old man grieve, Lena smiled.
"Harsh choices all. Or rational ones?"
"Don't mock. What parent sends a child gladly? No finger hurts less when all ten are bitten."
"Fingers? Such strong words."
Lena murmured laughing; the Southern Duke took it as sarcasm and clicked his tongue. But Uni saw it: Lena's eyes flicker faintly. Lena felt their plight mirrored hers. The less painful finger, selected sacrifice, discarded child. Beings remembered only thus, or soon forgotten. No, not similar—identical. That touched her heart; Uni sensed and grew uneasy. But the Southern Duke, oblivious, continued.
"Say what you will. But don't treat them as discards. I called you to prevent that."
"Then I'll have to try even harder."
Lena replied with calm eyes once more. Sincere. An unpredictable journey, unprepared knights, all knowing yet boarding the sinking ship. Were their choices love for family, duty to house, or inescapable coercion? Lena pitied them, no different from her past self. She resolved to protect them with all she had.
...
But an hour later, Lena Rubel's resolve crumbled before it began. A Southern knight said,
"We cannot accept you as our commander."
That was the first thing Lena heard at the meet-and-greet.