An Unwavering Gaze
Unwavering eyes stared straight at Taein. He had seen that look from her before. It was the day she first confessed that she wanted to become a nun.
“Sister Agnes must have already told you… That’s why I left the convent.”
Taein’s clenched fist trembled faintly. Even hearing the words directly from Sua’s lips, he couldn’t believe them. He wanted to demand answers. How could someone who had dreamed of becoming a nun her entire life change her mind so easily over one man?
“Sua.”
He forced down the emotions surging inside him. Taein knew all too well that pressing her now would accomplish nothing.
“I’m sure you chose carefully. If you left the convent after dreaming of becoming a nun your whole life, you must have agonized over it.”
He pretended to empathize while subtly slipping in his true feelings.
“But are you certain it’s a choice you won’t regret? You might have fallen for him so quickly because you’ve never been with a man before. If you just take a little more time…!”
“I know what you’re thinking.”
As if she had predicted his reaction, Sua spoke in a calm, steady voice.
“I went around singing that I would become a nun just like Sister Agnes for my whole life, yet my heart changed in only a few months. It must be hard to believe.”
Sua had denied it to herself countless times. She had convinced herself that God was testing her every time Tezman’s face floated into her mind. Perhaps it really had been a divine trial. In the end, she had betrayed God anyway.
“Every time I met him, I felt like I was falling into corruption. I prayed for repentance so many times. No matter how firmly I resolved myself, my heart would waver the moment I saw him.”
It had been nothing but confusion. The fact that she, who served God, could be so easily swayed by one man.
“I even planned to return to Korea. I thought that if I stopped seeing him, I might go back to the way I was before.”
But she couldn’t. Her heart had turned toward him so completely that she even forgot she was supposed to go back. The moment she stopped denying her feelings and accepted them, a strange peace settled over her.
“Then why didn’t you come back?! If you had returned right away…!”
At Taein’s outburst, Sua nodded as if she understood exactly how he felt.
“I realized I had given him my heart so fully that I forgot about returning at all.”
Taein’s parted lips slowly closed. This wasn’t some fleeting emotion. The realization that Sua truly carried that man in her heart made Taein’s chest feel so heavy he could barely breathe.
“You… You really mean it.”
She had chosen that man over God. Of course her feelings were sincere.
“Yes.”
Watching Sua smile so sweetly, Taein felt his heart twist. He could no longer bring himself to tell her to reconsider. Having grown up together, he knew her personality too well. The way she was acting now meant she had already made peace with her decision. There would be no changing her mind.
“I’m curious.”
Then he needed to see for himself. What kind of person could change Sua so completely?
“What kind of man he is that you would give your heart to him.”
Sua blinked her round eyes twice before a shy smile spread across her face.
“He’s a good person to me.”
She couldn’t bring herself to say he was a good person in general. After all, the fact that Tezman was part of the mafia remained unchanged.
“Then will you introduce him to me?”
Sua had spent her entire life shut away in a convent. How good could her judgment of men possibly be? He might be the type who looked polished on the surface but only knew how to make women cry. And even if he seemed decent, every person had flaws. Taein intended to latch onto those flaws and expose them.
Just as he had relentlessly hounded countless criminals until he finally threw them in prison.
“Introduce him?”
“Yeah. You’re like family to me. So I want to meet him. I want to see if you’re really being loved the way you deserve.”
“I’ll ask him. It would be nice if we could all meet.”
Taein gazed quietly at Sua’s innocent smile before speaking again.
“Sua.”
He called her name with the same gentle affection as in the old days, when the two of them had only each other.
“Yes?”
“I’m staying in Italy a few more days.”
He knew how kind she was. He knew how weak she was to rejection. And he knew she would try even harder to accommodate him if the request came from him.
“It feels lonely wandering around alone. If it’s okay with you, want to go sightseeing together? We used to explore everywhere together back at the orphanage.”
He even brought up the orphanage. It was a precious place for both of them.
“Sure. I’m fine with that.”
It was exactly the answer he had wanted.
When Sua returned to the estate, Tezman was working in his study. She had no idea he had been watching her the entire time. He had instructed the capo who went to pick her up to take his time. That way Tezman could return to the estate first and pretend to be calmly working as if nothing had happened.
Sua, completely unaware, simply assumed he had been working all afternoon.
“Have you been working this whole time?”
He reached out to her as she approached the desk.
“I had to do something while you were gone.”
He pulled her onto his lap with practiced ease and continued.
“Did you have a good time with your friend?”
“Yes. He’s become really manly. He used to just be a kid.”
“A man?”
“Ah, yes. His name is Park Taein…”
As she spoke, he buried his face in the nape of her neck. He pressed his lips to the pale skin there, then opened his mouth and bit down.
“Ah…”
“I don’t remember hearing that your friend was a man.”
Sua’s body trembled as he kissed the reddening bite mark.
“I think one man is more than enough for you, Sua.”
“Tezman.”
She pushed against his chest and lowered her eyes. Tezman simply watched her in silence, waiting for her to continue.
“Don’t worry about anything unnecessary. Taein is like family to me. I could never see him as a man.”
He already knew she didn’t see Taein that way. The real problem was whether Taein saw her as a woman.
Hiding his true thoughts, Tezman offered her a gentle smile.
“Are you telling me this because you’re afraid I might get jealous?”
“No… I just didn’t want you to misunderstand…”
“Or maybe you want me to be jealous?”
His mischievous question annoyed her, but she was also relieved. At least he wouldn’t misunderstand her relationship with Taein.
“I was afraid you might get the wrong idea, that’s all. I explained everything properly.”
The fact that she had explained pleased him. He stroked her back softly and asked.
“What exactly did you tell him?”
“Just… Anyway, there’s no need to worry.”
When she averted her gaze in embarrassment, he persistently followed her eyes until their gazes locked.
“I’m not worried. Any man with a functioning brain wouldn’t lay a hand on another man’s woman.”
“He’s not that kind of person.”
“I don’t like you defending another man in front of me.”
“…He’s not a man.”
Sua glanced at him before continuing.
“The only man for me is… Tezman.”
His hand paused in the middle of stroking her back. Overwhelmed by an emotion he had never felt before, Tezman let out a low, rough breath.
“Ha, Sua.”
She was unbearably lovely. He wanted to carry her straight to the bedroom and cover every inch of her with kisses. Her words—remembering what he had said, declaring there was only one man for her—sent adrenaline flooding through his veins. His heart pounded harder and harder, making him feel as if he had taken some powerful drug.
“That’s right. For you, one man is more than enough.”
It was the ultimate drug. More intoxicating than any alcohol, narcotic, or cigarette. No—it was beyond comparison.
“It had better stay that way from now on.”
To him, a man surrounded only by darkness, Sua was the single ray of light. His only salvation.
“For a lifetime.”
Hearing him emphasize the word lifetime, Sua smiled with pure, radiant joy.
“You made me quit being a nun… Isn’t it obvious?”
“I suppose it is.”
“Oh, Tezman.”
As if she had just remembered something, Sua spoke up.
“I promised to meet him two more times before he goes back. I don’t know when I’ll see him again… He said touring alone feels awkward. Is it all right if I go?”
Ah.
So she was going to see that bastard again. Tezman nearly let his true feelings show on his face, but he forced his voice to remain calm.
“When are you meeting?”
“We decided on the day after tomorrow, so… that would be Friday. Oh, and Taein asked me to introduce you. Would you like to come with me?”
He asked to be introduced to me? Tezman’s eyes narrowed.
“To me?”
“He’s curious. He wants to know what kind of person could make me give up becoming a nun.”
Watching her innocently repeat the words, Tezman gave a small laugh.
“I’m sure he is. But what can we do? I have an important meeting that day.”
There was no meeting, of course. He simply had no intention of falling for such an obvious trap.
“Ah, that’s all right. It can’t be helped.”
“Instead.”
He still needed to show his face. Only then could he accurately judge the situation—whether this Taein had feelings for Sua or not.
“I’ll come pick you up. We can greet each other then. You, me, and that friend of yours named Taein.”