Chapter 54
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 54
Chapter Title: To the Heart of the Capital
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"That white elf?!"
"He's male. Not an elf."
"A man?"
Kira stared at me intently, tilting her head.
Doesn't this girl even know what a man is?
"Ah! I get it now... But aren't men supposed to have muscles like balloons? This guy's not that buff."
...
That was the most irritating thing I'd heard all day.
So she thought I wasn't even a man?
"I'm sorry. Let me apologize on her behalf. I'm sure she didn't mean it that way."
The girl in the silver robe noticed my mood souring and apologized, but it wasn't enough.
"Biska."
Nod.
Biska stepped back at my call.
"Hey, magic girl. Why'd you butt in? You don't wanna throw down with the reps, do you?"
"Of course I wanna fight!"
"Fine, then. I dunno when I became the rep, but you wanna go at it with me?"
The word "go" carried all sorts of double meanings.
Obviously, I meant "have sex."
I locked eyes with Kira.
"Sure!"
The vibration energy had been building up nicely anyway.
New technique, uterus punch...
Nah, that's goddess-tier. Might not need to go that far.
<Pussy Climax>
How many times? Like 500-fold...
I briefly released my divine presence while thinking that.
"!"
Kira leaped back like she'd sensed a massive threat.
Almost ten meters.
Now far away, she glared at me with her fur bristled like an angry cat.
"Wh-what were you trying to do?!"
Her senses are insanely sharp.
Of course, it wouldn't save her from Pussy Climax anyway.
"Um, there seems to be some misunderstanding here."
The silver-robed girl spoke up.
"We got jumped out of nowhere, and you're talking misunderstandings?"
"Would you take a look at this?"
"What is it?"
The girl handed over some paper. It smelled of lavender.
"Ah, if you can't read the common tongue, I can read it for you?"
She was so thoughtful and kind.
"No, I can read it."
"To all the goddesses of the kingdom."
"I, Semen Man, intend to rape every goddess and steal your divinities."
"To start, I have neutralized the Goddess of Silence, Belzaria."
"I will not stop until you all kneel before me."
"Do not interfere."
"If you block my path,"
"I will kill you without exception."
"What the hell is this shit?!"
I flung the letter to the ground.
"I've never sent out crap like this!"
"This anonymous letter arrived at our Temple of Precepts too. So we heard about the guy described here, that... S-Sem... uh."
The girl coughed awkwardly, unable to say "semen."
"Anyway, it mentioned a white figure... so Kira and I decided to wait right here."
Biska picked up the letter, read it, and turned to me.
"What the hell is this, White?"
"No idea. Well..."
I had a hunch.
That crazy bitch. Why was she impersonating me and scattering challenge letters?
I'd still get wrecked if I fought Belzaria.
...What the hell was she thinking, revealing my existence to the other three goddesses?
Doesn't she care if I die?
This was driving me nuts.
"Ah, so this white elf was the southern rep!"
"It's right there in the letter. Why'd you get us mixed up!?"
"Heh heh."
Kira scratched the back of her head sheepishly and grinned.
What the...
"I'm the north's top warrior! Someone challenges me, I gotta fight, right? That's all I was thinking."
"I just came to get my S-rank license like it's a driving test."
The situation just got complicated. Should I bail?
"The goddess sent me with you for a reason."
Biska handed the letter back to the girl, who bowed politely to receive it.
"So... you didn't write this letter...?"
"Obviously. Who'd be insane enough to do that? I don't even know who your goddesses are!"
"..."
"..."
The girl let out a relieved sigh, like she'd been holding her breath.
"That's a relief."
"What? Forged letters like this can just reach Dragon Mama?"
Dragon Mama? What's that?
And this forgery wasn't some back-alley scam—it was done by a goddess herself.
The expert lurking behind Belzaria could've easily slipped it to her.
I had no idea why she kept sowing discord.
But now, other zones would be gunning for me.
It was like that time I marched on the capital pretending to be crazy to charge Belzaria. No, worse.
I had to subdue a goddess somehow to survive.
Or flee to some nowhere land.
That option was off the table now.
At least until I reclaimed my elf harem!
"So the white elf beating the Goddess of Silence was fake too?"
"..."
"..."
The mood turned awkward as I stayed silent.
The silver-robed girl watched me quietly too.
"That's..."
"True."
Biska answered for me.
"The goddess lost her divinity. It's common knowledge in the south now."
"For real!?"
Kira's eyes sparkled.
"Amazing, amazing, amazing! First time seeing a goddess-slayer! A historic powerhouse was right here."
"Hey, too close, back off..."
"Fight me. Kinda scary, but you're worth it...!"
"Even after clearing up the misunderstanding?"
"I wanna fight you!"
Tsk. Guess no choice then.
I wanted to anyway. Heh heh heh.
"Gotta get compensation for the wrecked cart anyway, and revenge for the cart guy."
Hah, no helping it.
I started stretching like it was inevitable.
"If I lose, do whatever! Kill me, enslave me!"
Kira bared her transparent battle aura and grinned.
"Northern warriors follow the winner's will if they lose. That's Dragon Mama's precept!"
"That I like."
Meaning she's undefeated so far.
From how wildly she's acting.
The match would end in an instant once it started.
Right then.
"Um... How about finishing the rest at the S-rank exam hall?"
"Hm."
It was a very polite plea to stop.
...
Honestly, the girl was so courteous and tried to clear things up, so I could kinda see her point.
"Yeah, maybe? White elf's aiming for S-rank, right? Me too."
"Yeah? You're not S-rank yet?"
"Basically am. First exam, though? Warriors care about proof. Let's throw down with a huge crowd watching."
Hmm. Sure, why not.
"I'll crush you miserably in front of everyone."
"Hee hee. Sounds perfect?"
I shook hands with the twintail beauty.
Quite an intense first meeting all around.
She took my taunt about humiliating her publicly and loved it.
"You coming too? To the S-rank hall."
"Yes..."
The girl seemed distracted elsewhere.
She was worried about the passersby watching the wrecked cart and commotion blocking traffic.
"We should clean this up first. Can't inconvenience everyone."
"..."
"I'll compensate the Shadow Guild... Sorry."
"Uh, yeah, sure..."
No reason to stop her if she's handling it.
She's an unusually kind type, I thought.
Soon she asked the guards for help gathering debris, and Biska and I awkwardly joined in, turning it into a volunteer cleanup crew.
"Hee hee, we got so much. Feels good seeing the street clean."
She seems a bit off too...
Just my imagination?
"Oh, time already... See you at guild HQ then. Biska, and... um."
The hesitant girl.
"Not Semen Man. Call me White. That's the official name."
"White... White. Nice. Means white, right?"
Yeah, White means white...
She's shaking my hand, so probably not germaphobic.
Kira had already bounced off alone.
"Oops. Biska! She didn't help with the cart."
"Guess she only cares about fighting..."
"Fucking bitch..."
Add that to the debt tab.
She started it, why's this girl paying?
Are they friends or something...?
"Ah, White, Biska. Please take this."
"Hm?"
"?"
Suddenly, she pulled out a soft silk robe from her bag—like one she was wearing. Looked expensive.
"Please wear this."
"No, we..."
"Please, I insist."
"What's this? Religious garb?"
I took it at her earnest request.
Biska followed suit, fondling the fabric.
"So soft."
"Like satin."
Too pricey for a casual gift.
"A present?"
"Yes. Don't worry about me. Bodies are precious for men and women alike. Don't expose them vulgarly."
"..."
The moral lecture I'd half-expected.
"This because of our outfits?"
"No, don't mind... Poverty makes it unavoidable sometimes... I'll help!"
"..."
"..."
Biska and I exchanged glances.
Sensing fatigue ahead, Biska donned the robe.
"There. On."
"Wow, perfect. Looks more dignified and beautiful."
"..."
Biska scratched her head.
"Now, White too..."
"Can't wear it."
I just handed the robe back.
"Huh?"
"Got a curse like that..."
"Really...?"
"Yeah."
The girl looked crestfallen, leaving me awkward.
Man, what can I say.
Hard to refuse her.
"Fine, I'll try. Watch..."
I dramatically tried to put it on.
[Equip Failed]
Shwooo!
"Kyaa!"
Just draping it summoned a gale, knocking the girl flat on her back.
"Ah..."
We stared, shocked.
Her robe hood flew off, revealing her face—stunningly pretty.
One hell of a beauty.
Skin pale as if untouched by sun, sparkling blue eyes.
Bleached-white hair.
Kind eyes and slender jaw gave a frail impression.
"S-sorry."
She quickly hooded up and stood.
"There really is a curse..."
"...Yeah."
"...Poor thing."
? Crying?
Already?
She grabbed my hand, looking up with teary eyes.
"Please come to our zone. I'll help however I can."
"...Uh, sure."
My pitiful state was real, after all.
Couldn't even take clothes off...
But the timing for comfort had passed; now it was just embarrassing.
I was used to this anyway.
Wearing something felt weirder.
"I'm Nibia. Means snow-white. Like White!"
"..."
Nibia said that sweetly, bowed politely, and headed central.
Pretty.
Wanna see her figure too. Guess my libido's strong.
"Gotta walk from now on, White."
"Yeah. What do you think of them?"
"...If they're our exam opponents, it'll be tough. Especially Nibia. Seems blessed with dragon power."
"Dragon power?"
"Glimpsed it in her right eye. You missed it."
Was there?
Only thought her face was pretty.
"East zone's under the Goddess of Precepts, White Silver Dragon Eltria. Nibia looks like her top priestess."
"Something in her eye?"
"Heard they get dragon power based on piety... Usually manifests in the eyes."
...Total bullshit.
Dragon power on top? What chance do others have?
I had artifacts too, but still.
"More importantly, goddesses gunning for me—sure we gotta go?"
"Might be better to show the central zone we're no pushovers. Safer than direct goddess fights."
...Right. Think that way.
Easier if I'm the one hunting goddesses, not vice versa.
This bullshit was daily now.
Central zone, Adventurer's Guild HQ.
The southern branch was just the tip of the iceberg—this place was massive.
Building rivaled a major hospital. First-floor reception packed with diverse adventurers.
My outfit didn't stand out here oddly.
Avg B-rank+, they figured artifact and moved on.
Nice vibe.
Adventuring might not suck.
Loved the spotless white marble floors.
"White. Over there. Let's register."
"Sure."
S-rank exam registration: done.
The receptionist was a black-haired bombshell with a beauty mark under her eye.
Wow.
Capital's different? Pure human hotter than elves.
"I'll help with S-rank registration. Eight in queue. Round 1 in two days. Okay?"
"Yes."
"Sign here."
...
"This guild bears no responsibility for injuries, unconsciousness, death, or mental breakdowns during S-rank exams."
"Sudden combats, anomalous magic, fights with nonhumans, or guild secret exposures causing abnormalities are solely the applicant's choice; no compensation claims allowed."
My signing hand paused.
Most brutal contract I'd seen.
"No biggie. Just sign."
Yeah.
Whining meant no S-rank.
Scribbled like Biska said, then toured central zone.
Cool white stone buildings, blue-tile roofs gleaming.
"Schedule prep exercises to peak condition till then. I'll help, White."
"Let's play."
"Huh?"
"We're here—time to have fun. Biska, date?"
"Wh-what, cheesy."
Biska's voice pitched up.
Blushing at unplanned date talk.
That's when I felt our relationship had shifted post-sex.
I hadn't been ignoring her boyish side.
"Take off the robe."
"N-no. Not now."
"C'mon. Why."
"..."
Biska pulled her hood low, turning away like hiding her face.
Oh ho. Knows to be shy.
"Fewer stares here, and who cares what they think inside. I wanna have fun too."
"Goddess gave plenty travel money."
"Food first then."
"You sure? Twintails tomorrow—shouldn't peak form now...?"
"Nah. Don't worry."
Honestly, S-rank was paperwork wait time.
That Kira girl? Vs me, 3-sec max. Doom awaits.
"If you say so..."
"Shall we?"
Under her hood, Biska's lips curved in a slight smile.