Possessiveness (4)
“Bishop Lowen... could you spare a moment?”
Her voice drooped like blanched bean sprouts.
She had seemed perfectly fine all the way through evening prayers, yet now her energy had plummeted.
“Of course. There’s no reason I couldn’t.”
Lowen adjusted his glasses.
He rose from the seat where he had been writing in his diary and crossed to the sofa set against one wall of the reception room.
“Come over here.”
When he beckoned her toward the sofa, Ariel—who had been hovering by the door—toddled over on small steps and plopped her bottom down.
“Um... Saintess?”
At Lowen’s call, Ariel tucked a falling strand of hair behind her ear and looked up.
“Yes?”
“Is there a reason you sat here?”
A distance where their shoulders might brush.
A distance where they could feel each other’s body heat.
Ariel had left the opposite sofa empty and settled right beside Lowen.
“...Is it not allowed?”
She tilted her head, resting it against the pillow she hugged to her chest.
Her purple eyes shone with pure, guileless light.
Since it wasn’t forbidden, Lowen merely shrugged.
“So what brings you here at this late hour?”
“It’s not that... there’s anything particular...”
Ariel, who had been gazing up at him, averted her eyes and muttered as if to herself.
“I just... wanted to talk with Bishop Lowen......”
Thinking she must have grown lonely after he had spent the past few days focused only on Seria and neglected her, Lowen offered a gentle smile.
“I see. As it happens, I wanted to talk with the Saintess as well.”
With that, he rose from his seat.
“Please wait just a moment first.”
Lowen left the reception room as he was.
Ariel rocked her body back and forth, staring blankly at the door while she waited for him to return.
“Sorry to keep you waiting.”
About ten minutes later, Lowen came back.
“Hmm?”
The instant he stepped into the reception room, a sweet scent sparked Ariel’s sharp curiosity.
The source of that sweetness was the pink mug in Lowen’s hand.
“The night is late, but sometimes we have to indulge in a little mischief like this.”
Lowen smiled slyly and held the mug out to her.
Ariel tilted her head and accepted it.
“Wow...! Hot chocolate!”
Hot chocolate made by melting milk chocolate thickly into warm milk.
Atop a hill of whipped cream, dark chocolate grated like flower petals had been sprinkled.
In the very center of that cream hill sat a toasted marshmallow, and as the finishing flourish a strawberry was nestled in place.
“Definitely... eating something like this at night is a bad thing... gulp...”
Ariel swallowed hard and stared down at the hot chocolate boasting its devilish calories.
“Today the moon is hidden behind clouds, so even the Lord won’t be able to see.”
“Is that so?”
“If we happen to get caught, I’ll take full responsibility then.”
“No. Since Bishop Lowen made it and I drank it, let’s be accomplices together.”
“Understood. Then from this moment on, we are in the same boat.”
After that joking exchange, Ariel beamed and took a sip of the hot chocolate.
The rich sweetness of the chocolate melted smoothly across her tongue.
“Mmmph! It’s delicious!”
Eyes sparkling, she made a fuss in a loud voice.
Lowen raised an index finger to his lips.
“Shh. If you raise your voice too much, we’ll be found out.”
“Oops.”
Ariel wiped the whipped cream from the corner of her mouth and whispered softly into Lowen’s ear.
“As expected, Lowen’s hot chocolate is the best...”
Hot breath tickling his ear canal.
It was mischievous like a fairy whispering, and at the same time lewd like a succubus gently scratching inside the ear.
“Ehehe.”
Though the breath was playful and sensual, Ariel’s smiling face remained young and utterly innocent.
Lowen and Ariel talked until the hour hand passed twelve and reached one.
Three days.
To some it would feel short; to others, long.
To Ariel it had clearly been long, for her excited voice showed no sign of stopping.
The topics themselves were ordinary.
“It was hot today. Summer must be coming.”
“The children said there’s a place near the village where you can play in the water.”
“We should go swimming sometime too. I can’t swim, but I love playing in the water.”
“I’ll only trust Bishop Lowen. If I start to sink, you have to come rescue me right away, okay?”
“A swimsuit? I think my nun’s habit would be plenty.”
“I’m joking. I can’t increase Bishop Lowen’s laundry load. When we get the chance later, let’s go buy swimsuits.”
After chattering happily for a long while, Ariel took a sip of her now-lukewarm hot chocolate and spoke in a quieter voice.
“Um... Bishop Lowen?”
Hugging the pillow, she glanced up at him.
“Go ahead.”
Ariel hesitated a moment before continuing.
“I really... completely by accident overheard something, you know?”
While she had been staring blankly at the ceiling in her bedroom, she had heard the Holy Knights talking beneath her window.
They had been smoking and chatting about Lowen and Seria.
That Lowen had once been Seria’s escort knight.
That Seria showed him particular favor.
And that Seria had formally asked him to become her escort knight again.
“Yes, I’m listening.”
Lowen watched Ariel’s lips move as she fumbled for words and gave her his full attention.
“Is it true that the Second Saintess... asked Bishop Lowen to come to the Grand Cathedral?”
“Saintess...”
“You want to go to the Grand Cathedral too, don’t you...?”
Before Lowen could even answer, Ariel pressed on.
“Every cleric wants to live at the Grand Cathedral. And if it’s the cathedral of the Second Saintess—the one they call the next Grand Saintess—even more so. If I weren’t a Saintess and just an ordinary cleric, I would have prayed every night to go there too.”
Yes. Every cleric dreamed of the Grand Cathedral.
To learn a deeper faith.
To gain greater enlightenment.
They longed to offer prayers every day in that sacred place.
Ariel hugged the pillow tighter.
She squeezed so hard the pillow puffed up as if it might burst.
“And... someone like me, a hopeless Saintess who only makes things hard... being with a proper Saintess would... be better for Bishop Lowen too, right?”
Listening, Lowen nodded.
“Yes, I think so as well.”
“Hic...!”
Ariel’s shoulders jerked as if she had hiccuped.
“If I went to the Grand Cathedral, I could live more comfortably than I do now. I wouldn’t have to prepare meals, I wouldn’t have to do laundry, and all sorts of other things would be taken care of by other people while I lived at ease.”
Lowen listed the advantages of the Grand Cathedral one after another, as if for Ariel to hear.
As he spoke as though he intended to go, a sharp ache began in one side of Ariel’s chest.
Why?
Shouldn’t she be congratulating him?
Why had she even brought this up in the first place?
Her head could not understand, so Ariel left everything to her heart.
She caught the tip of Lowen’s sleeve with her fingertips.
“Can’t you... stay here?”
Her long lashes trembled.
She looked up at him, glanced away, then looked up again.
“It’s selfish of me, but... I want Bishop Lowen to keep staying here. I know going to the Grand Cathedral is a good opportunity for you too, but... still... please stay here. Next year I want to look at the flowers in the dandelion field with Bishop Lowen again. Is that not allowed?”
Even she did not understand why she was saying these things.
Only that her heart was speaking.
Her heart was sniffling, I want Bishop Lowen to stay here.
Lowen released the hand clutching his sleeve and gently stroked her hair.
“Ah...”
Soft silver hair.
Each stroke released a faint scent of peach from the anointing oil.
Lowen smiled softly.
“Saintess, when did I ever say I was going to the Grand Cathedral?”
“What?”
Ariel’s eyes went round.
“B-but...”
“It is true that Lady Seria invited me to the Grand Cathedral. But I refused her on the spot.”
Ariel’s lips flapped open and shut in a flustered babble.
“Y-you refused?”
Lowen shrugged once and nodded.
“I don’t know why the Saintess thought I was going to the Grand Cathedral, but I will stay here.”
The cozy days spent in a rural cathedral, even if inconvenient, were better than the comfortable life of the Grand Cathedral.
And if he went to the Grand Cathedral only to draw the pursuit of the knight order, his position would become awkward.
No matter how much the Second Saintess protected him, those people were a group under the Empire’s command.
There was no telling what methods they might use.
Threats would be the least of it; they might even attempt a kidnapping.
“That’s right. The Saintess really is a hopeless person.”
“Hic...!”
“But a hopeless Saintess needs a hopeless bishop right beside her.”
She should have protested, “Bishop Lowen isn’t hopeless at all!” yet the words stuck in her throat.
It was because of the sheepish smile on Lowen’s face.
The warm smile in his eyes behind the glasses melted the frozen worry inside Ariel.
A real smile...
It was the first time.
The first time the man who always wore a false smile had truly smiled.
A warm spring breeze blew.
Dandelion seeds whirled wildly through Ariel’s heart.
It was three in the morning.
Until then, Lowen and Ariel had talked about every trivial subject under the sun.
“Hwaaaam... mmnya...”
Ariel yawned so widely her mouth nearly split.
“You should go upstairs and sleep now.”
“Nooo... I still want to talk more with Lowen...”
Rubbing her sleepy eyes, Ariel drew out the end of her words and listed sideways.
Still hugging the fluffy pillow, she ended up resting her head against Lowen’s shoulder.
“Saintess.”
“I can’t make it to my room... hwaam... Tonight I’ll... sleep here...”
With her head on Lowen’s shoulder, Ariel closed her eyes and dozed, nodding.
“Bishop Lowen...”
She spoke as if talking in her sleep.
“Sing me a lullaby...”
Lowen let out a short, incredulous laugh.
He had half-jokingly titled his diary “Ariel’s Child-Rearing Journal,” and it really did feel like looking after a child.
Would raising a daughter feel like this?
“Honestly... you’re not a baby. What lullaby?”
“Uung... um... awoo...”
Ariel made strange little sounds like a babbling infant.
“Hah...”
Lowen shook his head.
“Just this once.”
He laid Ariel down on the sofa, cleared his throat a few times, and began to sing a lullaby.
“Lullaby, lullaby...”
Even while thinking, What on earth am I doing?, Lowen sang the awkward lullaby and gently patted Ariel’s shoulder.
“Hmm......”
His hand patted slowly in time with his heartbeat.
“Bishop Lowen...... thank you...”
With those final words, Ariel drifted into dreamland while listening to Lowen’s voice grow distant.
“......Kooo......”
Lowen poked the sleeping Ariel’s cheek with a fingertip and smiled softly.
“You really are a hopeless Saintess.”