Chapter 51
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 51
Chapter Title: 6.3 Rain
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The drizzling rain brings my feet to a halt.
But I couldn't spare the time to go back and borrow an umbrella.
I wanted to see her right now.
Yuuki. I wanted to see you.
I step out of the building and plunge into the rain.
-Splash splash splash splash.
I kick off the rain-slicked road and run.
The March rain feels a little cold.
But it's okay.
Because I'll see Yuuki soon.
When she sees me, Yuuki will embrace me tightly, warming my chilled body.
Maybe she'll even cry from emotion.
Or get mad at me for worrying her.
Then I'll apologize, tears streaming down my face.
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for everything up until now, Yuuki.
And Yuuki will say it's okay, hug me tight, and tell me never to leave her side again.
Ahh. Yuuki.
I want to see you so badly.
I want to see you, Yuuki.
She'll worry that I'll catch a cold since I'm soaked through.
She'll drag me inside to the bathroom and tell me to take a hot shower.
I'll wash up with warm water, then change into Yuuki's clothes.
Will they be men's clothes or women's?
Either is fine. As long as they're Yuuki's.
Yeah. Now that Yuuki's a girl too, we can even bathe together.
Why didn't I think of that?
Becoming a girl isn't all bad.
We can bathe together, go to the bathroom together, change clothes together.
And I can tease her when I catch a glimpse of her naked.
Ahh.
I want to see you.
I want to see you, Yuuki.
I run.
Toward Yuuki's house.
Running to see Yuuki.
"Hah, hah, hah..."
My body has no strength left.
My steps slow to a crawl.
I'm out of energy. Out of magic power.
I need to recharge my magic soon.
Otherwise... I'll end up back there again...
Yuuki.
Yuuki, Yuuki, Yuuki.
Help me, Yuuki...
'Do you really think Yuuki will forgive you?'
Of course.
I love Yuuki this much.
And Yuuki... loves me too...
So...
My feet come to a stop.
「Kurosaki」
Before I know it, I'm in front of Yuuki's house.
"Hah, hah..."
But.
I can't bring myself to press the doorbell.
'Do you really think Yuuki will forgive you?'
...Shut up.
Shut up, Naibusu.
Shut up. Please, just shut up!
..........What if.
What if Yuuki doesn't forgive me?
I'm sorry.
I was wrong.
So please forgive me.
You will, right?
Yeah.
Yuuki will forgive me.
"Hoo."
-Ding-dong.
My finger trembles as I press the bell, and it's not just from the cold.
-Yes? Who is it?
A mature woman's voice comes through the intercom.
Yuuki's mother.
"...Uh, um, this is Tsukimiya Akane, Yuuki's friend."
My voice is shaking.
I used to be close with Yuuki's mom... until Yuuki became a girl.
She's as kind as Yuuki and always treated me well as her friend. She even called me Yuuki's bride when we were kids.
The first day I saw Yuuki as a girl, I might have... said something rude...
But it'll be fine.
It has to be fine.
-...Akane?
"Yes! It's Akane! Please tell Yuuki that Akane's here!"
-...Wait just a moment.
Good.
I was worried she'd turn me away at the door or hang up midway.
As long as she tells Yuuki... surely...
My body is cold.
The trembling is getting worse.
Because of the cold weather, the rain, stopping after running, the lack of magic.
'Do you really think Yuuki will forgive you?'
And the fear that Yuuki might reject me.
The shaking won't stop.
A moment later.
After minutes that feel like eternity.
The intercom finally responds.
...But it's not the voice I've been waiting for.
-Akane?
"...Yes?"
Why is it Yuuki's mom again?
Is she answering while Yuuki comes out to see me?
That's not necessary.
I just want to hear her voice right now.
To dispel this anxiety...
But her next words make my heart sink.
-I'm sorry, but Yuuki says she doesn't want to see you. Could you come back another time?
"............Yes?"
-It's late, so please go home for today.
"W-Wait a second!"
-Click.
The intercom cuts off before I can say anything.
Yuuki... doesn't want to see me?
That can't...
'Do you really think Yuuki will forgive you?'
"...Ugh!"
Tears surge up uncontrollably.
No way.
It can't be.
-Ding-dong. Ding-dong-ding-dong-ding-dong. Ding-dong-ding─
I mash the doorbell repeatedly.
No time for second thoughts.
I have to see Yuuki.
Apologize, kneel, prostrate myself if I have to—whatever it takes to get forgiveness.
Otherwise, I─
-...Who is it?
"Mom! I'm sorry! Please, just tell Yuuki one more time! Akane's here, it's urgent...!"
My voice cracks with sobs as emotions overwhelm me and tears pour out.
-Akane.
But Yuuki's mother cuts me off coldly.
-I don't want to let a child who bullied Yuuki see her.
"Wha..."
Bullied her?
I didn't bully Yuuki that badly...
-Go home. If you ring the bell again, I'll call the police. And don't ever come to our house again.
"W-Wait..."
-Click.
The intercom cuts off again.
...Why...
...Why is Yuuki's mom blocking me from seeing her? She definitely didn't tell Yuuki I was here. Otherwise, Yuuki would want to see me, right?
Haha. She's really going too far. Did she hear some bad rumors about me? Did Naibusu say something? Or has she never liked me to begin with?
...But.
I can't give up, Akane. You died and came back to life, remember? Miracles happen. The tougher the situation, the brighter the victory shines.
"Yu-Yuuki... Yuuki!"
I shout at the top of my lungs, calling for Yuuki.
"Yuuki! Kurosaki Yuuki! Are you listening? It's me, Akane! Come out!"
I yell loudly. For Yuuki.
If she hears me, please come out.
"Yuuki! Yuuki! Yuu! It's me! Akane!"
Please... please come out.
Let me apologize. Accept my apology.
Forgive me.
"Yuuki...!"
-Rattle.
The sound of a window opening.
"Yuuki!"
A face appears inside the window.
It's definitely Yuuki.
Her face looks even more girlish now, but there's no way I wouldn't recognize her.
It's unmistakably Yuuki.
"Yuuki! Your mom wouldn't let me see you! Isn't that too much? I came all this way..."
"Akane."
Yuuki's voice rings out clearly even through the rain.
Cold and emotionless.
So ruthless it makes me doubt if it's really the Yuuki I know.
"Don't make a racket and go home."
"Yuu..."
I'm speechless.
Her icy gaze shows no room for excuses.
"Don't ever come to our house again, Akane. I never want to see you again."
-Slam.
The window closes, and the curtains are drawn.
Yuuki's face disappears from view.
"Yu-Yuuki...?"
'Do you really think Yuuki will forgive you?'
Naibusu's words echo in my head over and over.
Again and again.
Asking if I really thought Yuuki would forgive me.
...No.
Deep down, I knew.
That Yuuki might not forgive me.
No.
The truth is, I already knew.
That she wouldn't forgive me.
That the one Yuuki truly opened her heart to wasn't me, but Naibusu—just like he said, so it had to be true. I already knew that.
But I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to accept it.
I wanted to believe there was still hope for me, a chance for forgiveness, a chance to go back to how things were...
Because if I didn't believe that... I couldn't go on living...
"Ha, haha, hahahaha."
My throat is parched.
No strength left.
My magic power is truly hitting rock bottom now.
I see. So I'm going to die now.
...I don't want to die.
Even if I die, I wanted to apologize to Yuuki, get her forgiveness, and die in her arms.
Die with a happy smile.
That way, even in that eternal darkness, I could smile remembering those happy memories.
...I didn't want to die like this.
With my final memory being Yuuki abandoning me.
The memory I'd dwell on in that darkness being this.
...No.
I don't want to die like this...
I stumble through the rain.
My legs are heavy. I can't keep my balance.
Where should I go? Should I go curse out my family one last time, the ones who sold me off?
But their house is too far. I have a feeling I'll collapse before I get there.
...Then where should I go?
Not knowing where to go or what to do.
I just walk aimlessly. Searching for a place to die, I walk.
Even then, someone calls out to me.
"Hey, missy, where you headed in this rain?"
"...?"
I look up at his face.
A stranger.
"Lost your way? Or did your folks kick you out?"
A creepy guy eyeing my chest.
My uniform is soaked, clinging transparently.
...Ahh. I see.
There is still a way for me.
A way to keep living.
"...Mister, are you a Rune Holder?"
"Huh? You like that? Uncle here's not a Rune Holder, but I know a soldier─"
...Yuuki. I'm sorry.
This is perfect for a filthy girl like me.
"...Mister, then─"
"─Pure Love Fan Kick!!"
"Guak?!"
As I start to speak, something flies in and kicks the guy away.
Golden hair, blue eyes.
Naibusu.
...Interrupted again.
By the Naibusu I hate the most.
Interrupted again.
I try to get angry.
But.
...Somehow, I feel relieved.
Finding myself like this pathetic, I let out a hollow laugh.
"...What? Playing hero? That's not even─"
-Slap!
A stinging pain on my cheek.
I collapse onto the rain-slicked ground.
...Did he hit me? Naibusu?
I touch my slapped cheek and look up at Naibusu.
Naibusu glares down at me.
With eyes even scarier than when he was about to kill me.