Chapter 94
Chapter 94
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 94
Chapter Title: Great Cleanup #4
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Luna tossed me a plant with striking red petals. It was the same stuff that had grown on those giant rats' heads before, and Somnia had chewed it raw.
Heshishi, was it? I knew its power all too well from experiencing it firsthand.
"Hey! They say even an elephant blacks out for a whole day if it eats this raw!"
"B-But there's no other way!"
She was right, no doubt about it. With that monstrous freak glaring us down, now wasn't the time to be picky.
"Grrrrr! Kyaaarrr!"
"Fuck off!"
Seizing the moment while Somnia's fist was jammed in the wall, grinding against it, I snatched the Heshishi flower and shoved it into my mouth, half-resigned to my fate.
Crunch crunch. The instant I chewed, a scorching pain hit my tongue—utterly vile.
No, this wasn't flavor. It was pure agony.
"Ughhhhaaa!!"
It was so insanely hot my sanity nearly flew out the window.
Now I got why Somnia's skin had flushed red and drool had poured from under her mask. Yeah, scarfing this down raw would drive anyone mad.
『Temporary Strength +3.』
『Acquired Temporary Skill: Mad Wall.』
『Relic Pluto's Pupil nullifies harmful mental walls.』
Other messages floated by, but I was too dazed, tears streaming, to focus. My whole body tensed up hard.
Sweat poured off me, my mouth burned like fire. I was fucking pissed.
"Shiiibaaak!"
It felt different from what I'd imagined, but no denying the surge of unnatural power.
Channeling that rage, I gripped my club tight and swung it sideways at Somnia's back with everything I had.
Whoosh! Crack!
"Gyaaak!"
My hit landed hard; she screamed from beneath the mask. I'd put my full swing into it.
I figured a bone or two might snap, but her body was tougher than expected.
"Die already, you fuck!"
Thwack! Thwack! Thwack!
I kept pounding her torso with the club while she was pinned, fist stuck in the wall. They say a madman's cure is the stick, right?
"Eek! Heok! Hik!"
Seemed to work like a charm.
But no matter how much I beat her, Somnia just screamed—no sign of collapsing or passing out. Guess I needed a finisher.
I raised my club high with both hands. Then brought it down full force on that massive, ridiculous liquid-proof mask.
Whoosh!
"S-Stop!"
Whether she'd snapped out of it or not, she yanked her arm from the wall and jerked her head back. Too late—my swing was an arrow loosed from the bow.
Crack!
My club shattered the mask on her head, exposing her bare face to the world.
First thing I saw: filthy bandages. Then, sprouting unevenly between them, pink hair.
Her ear and forehead, uncovered in the chaos, were grotesquely twisted.
Burn scars, probably. Was all that bandaging to hide them? Whatever it was, it looked painful as hell.
"D-Don't... look...!"
Somnia, who moments ago had been rampaging like a beast, now covered her face with both palms, frantic.
"D-Don't look...! You bastard! I'll gouge your eyes out!"
She trembled like a fledgling whose nest a predator had found. Ashamed of her hideous face?
That unexpected sight made the tension drain from my grip on the club.
My fighting spirit just... vanished.
Right then.
"Hassan! Don't let your guard down!!"
Luna burst from somewhere, hoisting her Silence Totem high with both hands, and smashed it straight into Somnia's face.
Crack.
"Gyak!"
Somnia toppled, rolling across the floor from the direct hit to her face.
But Luna's frenzy didn't stop.
"Cultist! Die! Die!"
"Eek! Ack! Hiiik!"
Thud! Thump! Thump!
"Ungh! Hng! Heok! Hik! Kweeeek!"
Luna hammered her face over and over until Somnia could only twitch and spasm wordlessly. Only then did Luna sigh and halt.
"Huu. We got her...."
Pssshhh.
Somnia's flushed, bloated body spewed eerie smoke and shrank to normal size. Down for the count?
Luna threw her arms up in joy.
"Whew, yes! Hassan! We took her down!"
"Y-Yeah...!"
"But she'll snap out of it soon! Hurry and restrain her!"
Luna's call was spot on. Shaken by Somnia's revealed face, I shook it off and helped tie her up.
Gag in the mouth, arms and legs twisted back and bound to my club.
No blindfold handy, so we emptied a leather pouch and yanked it over her head.
Only after trussing her up excessively did relief wash over me, strength ebbing from my limbs.
"Hoo, fuck, I really thought I was dead. Never imagined a cultist down here. Hamelin knew, right? Why the hell didn't she warn me?"
Talk about throwing someone to the wolves. I was pissed. Body aching all over, mouth burning like I'd swallowed a bomb.
"Shit! There's a talisman in the pouch! Super rare!!"
Even then, Luna rifled Somnia's pouches for loot. Taking the victor's spoils is basic, after all.
"Dagger!"
Of everything, the one that lit her up most was the conical dagger Somnia had wielded like a weapon.
"F-Fucking awesome.... It has enchantment spells.... Real obsidian dagger. Haaa...."
Luna trembled, staring at the dagger in her hands like she'd scored a class-unique unique from a boss.
Wait, it basically was.
"Good stuff?"
Looked ominous to me.
The short, weird conical blade didn't seem fit for stabbing folks or butchering monster corpses.
"Insane.... H-Hassan, can I have this? Huh?"
"Sure, take it."
"Really!? Shit!"
Bounce, bounce.
Unable to contain her glee, Luna broke into some bizarre dance.
"What're you doing?"
"Joy Voodoo!"
No clue what Joy Voodoo was, but with arms on hips, she swung her waist, shoulders, and head side to side like a pendulum.
Her goofy antics melted away my tension—or whatever it was.
"Hah, fine, now let's wreck that ritual circle or whatever."
"I'll do it! You rest, Hassan!"
Anyway, with Somnia secured, we stomped the hexagram ritual etched deep in the sewer to bits.
Amazingly, the thick foliage clogging the sewer withered and twisted away. Fucking wild—no words.
That wrapped up everything Hamelin requested, right?
* * *
Back at the tent in the sewers, Hamelin awaited us outside. She didn't bat an eye at the cultist I held.
I figured I had to call her out straight.
"Hey, fuck, if you knew about this dangerous bastard, you should've said something upfront. I nearly died...!"
"...."
But Hamelin ignored my gripe, just standing there silent. Playing dumb?
People in this world could be so damn arbitrary.
Fuck, that's why you don't take guildless quests lightly.
They haggle prices for bullshit reasons or stiff you after weird jobs.
"Hand."
Finally, she spoke.
"What for."
Thinking maybe gold coins, I held out my palm. Instead, she slapped a weird brooch-like thing into it.
"...Rat?"
Luna spotted it first.
Yep, a tiny bronze rat brooch, only the eyes gleaming red like cubic zirconia. Didn't look valuable.
Fuck, what even is this? Disappointment hit quick.
『Achievement 'Great Cleanup' complete: Acquired common relic Gray Rat Brooch.』
『Karma Value +100』
『Previous Karma settled; Karma rises.』
『Agility +2』
"Ooh, shit!"
I'd seen achievements and settlements before.
Back when I was Elfriede's slave, grabbing Clepius's Staff—that's when these first popped up.
"Bit different from expected. Anyway, my part's done. Gonna rest. Curse ward. Tired. Sleeping long."
With that, Hamelin ducked back into the tent. Even breaths soon followed. Out like a light, as claimed.
I'd been raging hard.
But direct stat boosts and karma gains left me stunned, anger gone clean.
"...Chaos Eternal."
Muttering too low for ears, messages appeared.
『Name: Hassan Lv. 10 → 12
Strength: 5 (+3)
Agility: 2 → 4
Vitality: 3
Karma: 412
Blessings: Blessing of Chaos | Shining Hand | Cloak of Night』
Numbers had jumped clear as day. The (+3) Strength from the Heshishi?
Noticing made my mouth tingle again.
Fuck, never eating that taste again.
We headed up to the surface. Midway, Luna piped up like she'd just remembered.
"But Hassan, how do we get out? Ladder's busted."
"Oh, right. What now?"
Stuck at the broken entrance, we pondered.
"Should we yell? Someone might pass by."
Sounded solid—no other ideas.
"Anyone out there! We're trapped down here!"
After hollering at the busted ladder awhile, a voice came from above.
"What're you lot doing down there?"
lutt, the Genreal store owner.
"Ladder's broken!"
"Sheesh, hold on."
Down came a long wooden ladder through the manhole. Fuck, saved from overnighting in the sewer.
"Don't recognize you. And that one's trussed up tight—not good people, huh?"
lutt helped me up the ladder, eyeing Somnia on my back.
"Doesn't look ordinary, that's for sure. Heard yelling, came to check. Glad you're okay."
"Thanks!"
"Man, I've always thought it, miss, but your sentences are short."
"Yeah yeah!"
With Luna's curt thanks, we hustled toward the Mars Guild building.
Tattered ruins beside it hosted tent barracks like a battlefield camp.
"Anyone there?"
Rustling, then a woman emerged. New armor threw me—Hippolyte.
Got new gear? Fuck, jealous.
"Hassan of Samaria, didn't I say guild ops are suspended for now?"
"Hippolyte! Caught a cultist!"
"Eep! Ahem, ahem. N-Noxdoty's here too. Throat's been rough lately, coughs now and then. Ahem. Anyway, cultist?"
"Right here."
I set Somnia down before Hippolyte. Only then did I relax.
Like dropping a bomb-filled bag in a safe spot.
Hippolyte's tough as nails. If the cultist thrashed, she'd handle it. Sun still up, too.
Slight frown.
"Hm."
"This one's maskless—wondered who. Yep, a cultist sorcerer wielding idols and undead. You subdued her? Big skill gap there."
"W-Well, luck, I guess."
"Yes, luck. Key in victory. Good work. We'll jail her. Details tomorrow here. Go rest."
Back to weekend vibes.
We hit the baths, scrubbing sewer grime from body and clothes. Emerging, night had fallen—twin moons in the sky.
"Dinner time!"
Luna cheered, but I had zero appetite. Heshishi still scorched my mouth.
"I can't eat. Mouth hurts too much—any fix?"
Luna fidgeted, towel-drying her damp hair, looking troubled.
"Hm, not no way. B-But tricky and complicated...."
"What? Anything—do it. Feels like dying from spice!"
"O-Okay, come here."
She led me to a dark corner. Patted my knee and thigh to make me squat.
"S-Sit here like this. Pretend there's an invisible chair in midair...."
"Invisible chair?"
"And close your eyes!"
Weird-ass ritual.
But I'd eat dirt to kill this burn, so I followed.
Eyes shut, squatting awkwardly in air.
"Like this? Good?"
"Y-Yeah! Stay still now—."
Slight touch.
Something small and warm brushed my eyelids and forehead. Her palm? What the—?
Squish.
Soft, plush warmth hit my lips, then something softer and warmer slipped inside.
Eyes covered, it felt like my face was in another world.
"Slurrrp... D-Done!"
Opening up, Luna's moonlit face glowed pink from the bath. Sweet, faint scent tickled my nose—nice.
"H-How? Not spicy now?"
She wiped her lips with her hand back, grinning.
My face burned, heart pounding huge. Heshishi aftereffects? Battle adrenaline? Or her strange spell?
Blushing hard, Luna peeked at her toes, mumbling.
"Uh, race home? Loser buys tomorrow's breakfast!"
"Go!"
"You cheater!"
Victory's world is lutthless.
[Author's Note]
Nearing 100 chapters already...!! One month serializing... 100 chapters... What the hell is this...!!!
But Hassan's such a dunce he can't even properly seduce Luna, so no smut opportunities...
Miss Choo-ri...
Holding breath again... Hngggg-!