Mayo's Bizarre Food Mukbang (2)
“As everyone knows, an appetizer exists to whet the appetite before the main meal even begins, geosida. Therefore, mayonnaise baby formula is an excellent appetizer, geosida!”
The viewers, completely hypnotized by Mayo's intense and sincere declaration, failed to even notice that Half-Cam had already been switched on.
Only when Mayo enlarged the Half-Cam feed until it covered nearly half the left side of the screen did they finally catch on and snap their eyes wide open.
“Alright, alright. Mayo is always dead serious about mukbang, geosida. That's why she spent the last few days carefully selecting only the finest ingredients, geosida. One look here and you'll understand just how serious she is, geosida.”
What the Half-Cam showed was a modest desk.
The first thing that jumped out was a bottle of Ottogi Gold Mayonnaise, its brand logo so crystal-clear it might as well have been a paid product placement.
Beside it sat stick-type baby formula packets and a cup of warm water prepared in advance.
As always, the casual viewers cared more about the side dishes than the actual ritual.
They were already clamoring for her to lean forward just a little so they could see her upper body or legs.
Honestly, from this point on it was entirely up to Mayo's discretion.
It wasn't like I could suddenly possess Ju-ttak and instantly remodel Mayo's physique or anything.
So how exactly was Mayo going to navigate this situation?
“Mayo knows exactly what you all want, geosida. But if she goes all-out with her sincerity, she'll be way too sexy and none of you will be able to focus on the food, geosida. She doesn't want to slap a 19+ rating on the stream, geosida.”
Viewers were expressing their dissatisfaction with the aggro in the roughest terms possible.
In the end, unable to withstand the fierce public opinion, Mayo leaned her body forward with a look of reluctant surrender.
“Mayo already warned you, so don't go regretting it, geosida. She perfectly polished the pose Seo-a unnie showed during her Half-Cam, geosida. Everyone's gonna fall for her at first sight, geosida.”
The pose I had shown at the café...
Surely she wasn't talking about that finishing move where you deliberately tilt your upper body so the mid-line just barely grazes the edge of the table?
But Mayo, that isn't a technique just anyone can pull off.
“Ooh! Ha! This is what sexy looks like.”
Unfortunately, our Mayo was a friend whose measurements hovered endlessly close to the Korean female average.
In her own mind she had twisted her body seductively, but with that scrawny frame the whole thing just looked like a teenager secretly trying on her college-age sister's clothes and striking awkward poses in the mirror.
Right there in front of the viewers, Mayo's true form had been completely exposed.
Ta-da! The 19+ sexy appeal artist known as Mayo was, in reality, a stunted little shrimp of a friend who could easily be mistaken for a middle schooler.
Honestly, even I had been a little shocked the first time I saw her during the test stream.
I genuinely wondered whether an actual middle schooler was lying about her age and pretending to be 19.
When she calmly explained that her home environment had been so messed up she never got to eat properly growing up, I stopped asking any further questions.
Between Lucy and Mayo, why were both of them living in such unstable circumstances?
She added that it used to be like that but things were fine now, so I simply said I understood.
If I started poking around out of idle pity and meddling, it would only end up hurting her more.
Once we got closer, the day would come when Mayo brought it up herself and I could respond properly.
“I keep seeing chats calling me a middle schooler, and Mayo admits she might look that way because she's so baby-faced, geosida. Also, Mayo is still right in the middle of her growth spurt, geosida. If she's already this much now, she's terrified of how sexy she'll become after she finishes growing, geosida.”
Thankfully, Mayo continued bantering with the viewers without the slightest wrinkle of self-consciousness.
Even though she was different from what the casuals had expected, they found her overflowing confidence and shameless banter entertaining enough to stick around.
Most importantly, today's main content hadn't even started yet.
“Mayo is a body full of sin, geosida. Today alone she has created far too many followers who fell for her charm, geosida. As an apology she will put her absolute all into today's mukbang, geosida.”
Mayo's small, snow-white hands immediately tore open a formula stick and boldly dumped it into the hot water.
They were so tiny it almost looked like a little kid fiddling around with a dollhouse tea set.
After emptying every last bit of powder from the stick, Mayo stirred vigorously with a tiny teaspoon.
Once the mixing was finished, only the final step remained.
Without the slightest hesitation Mayo squeezed the mayonnaise bottle hard, dumping a lump easily the size of two spoonfuls straight into the cup of formula.
Viewers let out groans of despair at the sheer cruelty of not even giving them time to brace themselves.
The chat window exploded with demands for compensation for the eyesight lost to the ocular terrorism.
“All you taste-blind people keep yapping this and that, geosida. One taste of this and you'll finally open your eyes to true gourmet cuisine, geosida.”
“No point dragging this out—Mayo's going in hot and hard right now, geosida. Everyone, cheers, geosida.”
Mayo thrust the cup toward the camera so the contents were crystal clear, then, true to her word, downed it in one smooth gulp without a single moment of hesitation.
Gulp, gulp—!
Because it was Half-Cam the actual act of drinking wasn't visible, but the realistic sound effects combined with the high-performance virtual avatar's facial tracking reflected Mayo's expression in real time.
“Kyaa! This is exactly the taste, geosida. The mayonnaise gently wraps around the unpleasant aftertaste of the formula and completely tames it, geosida.”
Viewers couldn't help but marvel—no, they couldn't help but be horrified—at the sheer audacity of one-shotting mayonnaise formula without flinching.
What kind of taste buds would make even the neighborhood mutt cry and run away?
“First dish cleanly cleared, geosida. Moving straight to the next one, geosida.”
Because she had already ordered delivery before going live, prepping the next food took no time at all.
The next menu to appear was fermented skate three-combo.
A dish with its own dedicated fanbase: boiled pork slices and raw fermented skate eaten together with kimchi.
But what if mayonnaise got added on top of that?!
“Ugh! The smell is way too vicious, geosida. Mayo's sensitive nose has been wounded, geosida.”
The fermented skate three-combo sat prettily arranged in a pure white bowl.
Originally the white tones of the skate and pork should have been wrapped by bright red kimchi, but that kimchi had been completely smothered under a thick layer of mayonnaise.
Behold: fermented skate three-combo, mayonnaise-dunk style!?
“Uurp! My nose... my nose feels weird, geosida!”
The moment Mayo's virtual avatar made a teary face and started fidgeting restlessly, the chat window was instantly plastered with “lmao”s.
She might claim she could eat anything as long as there was mayonnaise, but smell was a completely separate issue.
A brand-new reaction was born on the spot: she shot up from her seat and stamped her feet as if her sinuses had been blasted clean open.
“Ugh... last up is dessert time, geosida. Mayo's nose went weird and she died and came back to life, geosida.”
The final bizarre dish was an extremely simple combination.
A steady seller in the bizarre mukbang scene: cheesecake paired with kimchi!
And then a generous squeeze of mayonnaise piled on top.
“Then Mayo's going in right away, geosida. Nom!”
Judging by the way her avatar kept chewing, she had taken a huge bite.
Every viewer waited with pounding hearts for Mayo's taste review score.
“The softness of the cheesecake and the crunchy texture of the kimchi create a exquisite contrast, geosida. And the mayonnaise covering it all brings out a creamy sensation while adding a rich savory flavor—it's the perfect dessert! Highly recommended to everyone, geosida.”
Bizarre mukbang was originally content where viewers cackled while watching the streamer suffer, yet Mayo was instead flaunting her mutt-level taste buds by declaring everything delicious, and that was setting the viewers on fire.
They were already screaming for a second round of bizarre mukbang and calling for pinball donations.
Plenty of people were regretting that they should have recommended even more extreme menus during the funding stage, all because Mayo was raising her nose and asking if they couldn't even handle this much.
“You guys are all so low-tier you can't even satisfy a gourmet like Mayo's palate, geosida. Try a little harder, geosida.”
True to a League of Legends player whose passive was trolling, Mayo unleashed an area-of-effect taunt.
In that moment I became certain.
Right here, today, the undisputed number-one bizarre mukbang virtual streamer of Pangea TV had been born.