Separation Anxiety
It had taken mere seconds.
Mana—something even the gifted supposedly needed days to even sense—Alex had felt it in the blink of an eye.
"So this is... mana?"
The exclamation slipped out of him on its own.
The overwhelming 'mana' that filled everything around him, something he had never once perceived before, was staggering—staggering to the point of wonder.
Ah.
His own mana, of course, and the mana of Leo sleeping in the bedroom, and the mana of the chickens they raised in the backyard, all the way out to the mana of the neighbors next door.
Every last thread of it registered, distinct and separate.
Ah...
And then, farther still.
The crops growing in the fields, the grass and trees at the foot of the hill behind the house, and the mana of the animals that lived there.
...Ugh.
And then, beyond the village itself.
As his senses stretched outward, the mana poured endlessly into Alex's mind—wave after wave of it, along with the information woven inside—overflowing until it came spilling out.
His head began to ache, and thought became impossible. It felt like his eyeballs were being pulled from their sockets, like his brain had been shaken violently inside his skull.
His overtaxed brain finally rebelled, and blood began to trickle from Alex's nose.
[Ooh! Guess this really is another world—the mana here is way denser than on Earth.]
[Still, sensing mana this fast wouldn't be easy for anyone.]
[It's not like you're a polymorphed dragon, Alex.]
[Is it because of me?]
[Is it because I'm just too amazing?!]
Lee Baek, who had been chattering away, finally noticed Alex's state.
[Whoa, hey!]
[This is dangerous!]
At his words, the expansion of mana-sense that had been spreading in every direction came to a halt. The range in which Alex could feel mana began to shrink, little by little.
At last.
When only the mana near the house remained, the pain vanished, and Alex was finally able to breathe properly again.
"Haa... what just happened?"
[The way I can feel your senses? Now you can feel mine. That's all.]
[And I already know what mana is and I'm used to handling it.]
"Ah."
With that explanation, Alex understood.
For a lich who had reached the very pinnacle of magic, sensing mana would be as easy as breathing.
"And because I used it, everything went sideways."
[Exactly. A human body has its limits, apparently. Besides, you're no mage—you're just an ordinary guy.]
Hoo.
Wiping away the trickle of blood, Alex let out a long breath.
"So how did you shrink the range?"
[Simple. I did it like closing one eye to narrow your field of vision.]
[Or pinching your nose shut to block out a smell.]
The analogy was easy to grasp, and Alex nodded along.
[Now that you can sense mana, we can move straight on to forming your circle.]
"Is that... allowed?"
When it took other people weeks, sometimes months, it felt wrong to blaze through it like this.
[It's fine!]
[Enjoy it. Like I do.]
"I think you enjoy things a little too much."
Still, Alex decided to take it in stride.
The faster he learned magic, the brighter Leo's future would become. That was reason enough.
[But let's stop here for today.]
[Forming a circle requires focus in perfect condition.]
[And magic demands a strong will, too.]
Alex agreed.
The pain was gone, but the crushing weight of what he'd felt, and the dazed numbness that came with it, still lingered.
Rubbing the space between his brows, Alex returned to the bedroom—and the moment he saw Leo asleep, a smile spread across his face without a thought.
"Mmm. Nom nom."
The grilled meat at dinner must have been truly delicious, because Leo seemed to be eating it even in his dreams—and Alex couldn't help laughing.
This is what happiness is.
With a look of deep contentment, Alex lay down beside him.
Just as he was about to drift off, however, a stray thought surfaced and opened his eyes again.
"Come to think of it, didn't you tell me to catch something?"
[Me? Catch what?]
"Before I grabbed the glass orb—the life vessel. It sounded like you said, 'The stone. Catch it.'"
At Alex's words, Lee Baek tilted his head. He didn't have a head, but the gesture came through all the same.
[I never said anything like that?]
[Besides, you can only hear my voice when you're touching the life vessel. If that weren't the case, I would've called out to humans ages ago!]
"Really?"
So then it wasn't Lee Baek.
"But the voice sounded so similar."
Now that he thought about it, he had the strange sense that he'd heard that mysterious voice not in the present, but from the future.
Then who was it?
It wasn't the voice of Solenius, the chief deity. And the one he'd assumed it resembled—Lee Baek—swore it wasn't him.
No other candidates came to mind.
After a moment's consideration, Alex shook the question off and closed his eyes.
I'll figure it out slowly, in time.
The next morning.
Cock-a-doodle-doo!
The moment the sun rose and their chicken crowed, Alex's eyes snapped open. He immediately checked on Leo lying beside him.
"Mmm..."
There he was, six years old, sleeping soundly without stirring in the slightest.
"Haa."
Alex, who had been wound tight with tension, let out a sigh of relief.
Experiencing something so impossibly happy—the very thing he'd only ever dreamed of—he had honestly wondered if it was his life flashing before his eyes before he faded away for good.
"But it's not, huh."
Alex gave Leo's soft, squishy cheek a gentle poke and burst out laughing. Haha!
[What, you're up already?]
He'd hoped it was all a dream, just a little.
With a light sigh, Alex looked at Leo again and broke into a goofy smile.
[By the way, is there no one else in this house?]
[Where are the kid's parents?]
Lee Baek asked, figuring children usually slept with their parents.
"My sister and her husband went out on mercenary work about five years ago and never came back."
Alex said it plainly.
Six months after Leo was born.
Having recovered and steadied themselves, his sister and brother-in-law had left home for a big commission.
According to plan, they would finish the job and then spend a long stretch living together with Leo and Alex—watching Leo grow, and teaching Alex the sword.
But neither of them ever returned.
"I was fifteen at the time."
From that day on, a fifteen-year-old boy began caring for a six-month-old baby. Without the villagers' help, Leo would never have grown up this healthy.
[Uh... sorry?]
"It's fine. It wasn't your fault."
A lich apologizing for something that wasn't even his doing.
You really did live long enough to see anything, Alex thought.
Besides...
In terms of his soul's age, twelve years had already passed since then. The twenty-year-old young man was already thirty-two inside.
The longing and grief for the sister and brother-in-law who never came home still lingered, but it was no longer the raw, burning thing it had been in his childhood.
"Anyway, Leo is what matters now."
The age of ruin had taught him, thoroughly and without mercy, that the living mattered more than the possibly dead.
"I have a question. If I run into a mage or a priest, is there any chance they'd figure out you're inside my body?"
[Mages should be fine.]
[Try feeling the mana around you.]
At Lee Baek's prompting, Alex exhaled lightly and focused—and just like the night before, the mana of his surroundings came flooding into his awareness.
The mana of Leo sleeping right in front of him, the mana of the chickens clucking away in the backyard, and even the mana of the neighbors who had begun stirring for the day.
Whether it was Lee Baek's doing or not, the range of mana-sense fit Alex perfectly.
Imagining it as a nose pinched shut is kind of hilarious, though.
Either way.
Even trying it again, it felt wondrous.
[Look at the mana around you.]
[You only sense your own, right, Alex?]
"I guess so."
Just as Lee Baek said, the only mana radiating from Alex himself was his own—a pale spring-green mana, like a sprout just breaking the soil.
[My soul and mana are veiled beneath your soul, your body, and your mana. Like a lid placed on top.]
[So the mages won't catch on.]
If so, that was a relief.
[Priests, though, I'm not so sure about.]
[Divine power works on completely different principles.]
[And this isn't even my home world.]
...Which was the unfortunate part.
[Do you know any priests around here? Might be easier to just ask one directly.]
Alex thought about it for a moment—then turned his gaze to Leo, who had just woken up.
"Mmmh... Uncle..."
Fresh and fluffy as a baby chick, Leo looked at his uncle, already awake, and beamed. Alex smiled right back.
"Morning, my Leo! Sleep well?"
"Yep! Oh, Uncle—you know what? I ate meat in my dream! It was sooo good?"
Leo grinned wide as he chattered, and Alex burst out laughing. Haha!
"Well then, let's get washed up and have breakfast."
"Okay!"
"Hey, Leo. Is there anything weird about Uncle?"
"Weird?"
Leo tilted his head and looked his uncle over carefully. Those sky-colored eyes brimmed with affection.
"Nope! Nothing!"
Exactly the same as always.
Alex grinned and ruffled Leo's hair, and Leo squealed with laughter at the roughhousing.
[I said ask a priest, so why are you asking Leo?]
Well—because Leo was the boy destined to become the Hero, wielding divine power stronger than even the Pope's.
Not yet, anyway.
Still, somehow, Leo's answer was easy to believe.
Alex had no intention of parading around under a priest's nose, but he figured he could breathe a little easier for now.
After breakfast, Leo ran off to play with his friends,
[So what are you doing now?]
[How about we go catch a rabbit? I've never had it before, and I'm curious.]
Alex, half-tuning out Lee Baek—who was already completely absorbed in thoughts of lunch—followed after Leo instead.
[Huh? You're following Leo?]
A little way off, Leo had met up with his friends and was talking excitedly.
"My uncle grilled meat for me, and it was SO good!"
"Whoa! Really?"
It had been Lee Baek's recipe and his instructions, but at Leo's praise, Alex's chest puffed up all the same.
"Huh? It's Leo's uncle!"
"Hm? Uncle?"
Leo hadn't known Alex had followed him, and at his friend's words he spun around—then waved with a huge grin.
"Uncle!"
Alex waved back, smiling.
"Play safe, Leo!"
"Okay! We're going to go see the horses today!"
Not that they could get close—too dangerous—but sometimes, when the man watching over them had a moment to spare, they were allowed to feed the horses.
Alex trailed behind Leo and the children as they sprinted off, giddy with excitement.
[Huh? You're following them again?]
[Why?]
"It's just... if he's out of my sight, I get anxious."
Alex still couldn't quite believe this reality was real. Some part of him kept insisting it was all an illusion—that any moment he'd open his eyes to find an eighteen-year-old Leo, dead.
And besides...
He had followed Leo everywhere for twelve years. Being suddenly apart from him now felt impossible.
[Separation anxiety?]
"Maybe."
Alex smiled, a little bitterly.
And then—
"Leo!"
"Yeah? What is it, Uncle?"
He loved the way Leo turned around whenever he called. He loved it—the way the boy would meet his eyes and answer him. He truly, desperately loved it.
[Are you crying?]
It moved him to the point of tears.
Which was why he kept calling.
"Leo!"
[You've called Leo's name fifteen times already.]
...That many?
While Alex, who hadn't even noticed, stood there stunned, Leo—who had been playing with his friends—came running up with a pouty face.
"Come on, Uncle! If you keep calling me like that, I can't play with my friends!"
"...Sorry."
Alex felt guilty—but at the same time, he was quietly overjoyed.
Unlike Hero Leo, who had been forced to fight his enemies without a moment even to complain, the Leo of today was free to whine and sulk to his heart's content.
"You should go work too, Uncle. That's how we get yummy food again tomorrow."
"You used to tell me not to go when you were little..."
"That was when I was little! Grown-ups have to work!"
At the spirited little speech from six-year-old Leo, Alex burst out laughing. Haha!
"Alright, alright. Uncle will go to work."
"Yep!"
"...You're really going?"
"Go already!"
At that, Alex deliberately turned away with a exaggerated sulk. And then—
"Uncle!"
Leo's voice rang out.
"Good luck! I love you!"
The sulky uncle must have bothered him, because Leo shouted it as loud as he could. The friends beside him dissolved into giggles.
"I love you most of all, my Leo!"
Alex answered with a smile as bright as the morning sun.
[Is it like this every day?]
"More or less."
[An uncle and nephew completely unashamed about their love. Nice.]
"We're the only family each other has."
[Oh...]
Having, without meaning to, left Lee Baek at a loss for words, Alex headed out to the fields to work.
Not that the separation anxiety had vanished—he still kept glancing toward wherever Leo was playing.
And along with him, the scenery of the village drifted into his eyes.
In the future, this place had been packed and chaotic with the shanties of fleeing refugees—but right now, it was simply a quiet, peaceful village.
He loved that peace, truly loved it. And he wanted to protect it.
So, for the sake of what he really had to do, Alex returned home and made his way to the study.
There, he drew out a sword—well cared for, its edge immaculate.
This was the sword his sister had once bought him as a gift.
It was also the sword sixteen-year-old Leo had carried with him when he set out on his journey in the future.
[Oh! Sword training, huh?]
[So you WERE hiding your strength all along!]
[And here I thought you were just a plain old farmer—you were secretly powerful this whole time!]
Lee Baek sounded inexplicably delighted, and Alex pulled a face of pure disbelief.
He didn't even know what the guy was talking about, let alone why he was so worked up.
[Wait, no—you're a farmer, so that makes you a Power-Hiding Farmer?!]
Alex genuinely had no idea.
